What this thread needs is a pic of Hansen's face 'shopped onto a skateboarder.

I've seen it (or something similar) on...THAT...imageboard. If I had it, I'd post it.

/the second sentence in this post has been brought to you by the letter B

Half pipe, huh? They have pills for that now.

I do like that headline.

/yep

what do you call a double pipe? cause i have one of those...

She is a pro skater too. She can grind my rail.
/jokez

It will be funny when he gats raped in jail.

Could be worse his name could be Gator

"She was fifteen years old, going on thirty-five, Doc, and she told me she was eighteen, she was very willing, I practically had to take to sewing my pants shut. Between you and me, uh, she might have been fifteen, but when you get that little red beaver right up there in front of you, I don't think it's crazy at all and I don't think you do either."

Skater chicks are hoooooooottttttt.

Brian Patch? Holy sh*t.

Shiat, if it's going to be that kind of party, I'll just stick my dick in the mashed potatoes.

How old is 15, really?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NGb3GPXi0gw

A celebrity (even if in a subculture) sleeping with an underaged groupie - I am shocked and appalled that society allowed this to happen.

He's been at X Trials? Soon he'll be in something that rhymes with that at least.
/He's a guy molesting a girl - hang him!

flamingboard: what do you call a double pipe? cause i have one of those...

Dual with a spine?
I stopped skating (for the most part) 3 years ago after nearly 16 years of beating my body senseless on a daily basis (knees are farked). I've never heard of this guy.
However, I canceled my Thrasher and Big Brother subscriptions when I was 20, so I may missed a few things.

Josh Casper owes me beer money.

^HAVE^
Apparently my hands are farked too. Damn palm bruises.

Has he screamed "It's Not A CRIME!" yet?

flamingboard: what do you call a double pipe? cause i have one of those...

You have 2 peeners?

What is the 'lewd' act? This article tells you nothing but that some skater got arrested. BFD.

Whichever subby would describe coitus like that either has no knowledge of skateboards or no knowledge of sex, but possibly both.

Commander Lysdexic: A celebrity (even if in a subculture) sleeping with an underaged groupie - I am shocked and appalled that society allowed this to happen.

He's been at X Trials? Soon he'll be in something that rhymes with that at least.
/He's a guy molesting a girl - hang him!

Only in Texas -- other states seem to frown on capital punishment for people of exceedingly low IQ.

TSE: "She was fifteen years old, going on thirty-five, Doc, and she told me she was eighteen, she was very willing, I practically had to take to sewing my pants shut. Between you and me, uh, she might have been fifteen, but when you get that little red beaver right up there in front of you, I don't think it's crazy at all and I don't think you do either."

Thank you for sharing that Mr. McMurphy.

deevo

Pot, meet Kettle. Kettle, meet Pot.

deevo: Whichever subby would describe coitus like that either has no knowledge of skateboards or no knowledge of sex, but possibly both.

Well, they are smart enough to use a keyboard... so I'm guessing that they are not a skateboarder, but they might be TOO smart, and unpopular with the ladies.

Who cares? This happens *all the time*. Sex a basic instinct and the sooner these people get that through their heads the better.

I never liked skaters.

FTA Brian Keith Patch, 36, of Westminster is facing felony charges for allegedly committing a lewd act with a 15-year-old girl.

WESTMINSTER - A professional skateboarder is facing a felony charge of committing a lewd act with a minor, officials said.

Brian Keith Patch, 36, of Westminster is accused of committing a lewd and lascivious act with a 15-year-old girl.

Who did what where now? Half this article is just one reiterated sentence.

phillydrifter
flamingboard: what do you call a double pipe? cause i have one of those...

You have 2 peeners?

I assumed so. I'm thinking the big one takes batteries.

Satan_Himself: phillydrifter
flamingboard: what do you call a double pipe? cause i have one of those...

You have 2 peeners?

I assumed so. I'm thinking the big one takes batteries.

The small one takes vodak.

Never heard of him. He's 36 and still skating? At that age, doesn't he feel slightly out of place hanging out with a bunch of teens?

I quit the skateboard thing when I was about 31. Thanks to skateboarding, running, skiing, and snowboarding, my hips and knees are shot. I'm jealous that at 36 he is still able to do that stuff. The thought of getting on a board sends waves of pain to my hips and knees. Even when I get new hips and have my knees worked on, I don't think I'll be doing any skateboarding. I just want to be able to walk down stairs without screaming.

/approves

Jamieboy: Never heard of him. He's 36 and still skating? At that age, doesn't he feel slightly out of place hanging out with a bunch of teens?

I quit the skateboard thing when I was about 31. Thanks to skateboarding, running, skiing, and snowboarding, my hips and knees are shot. I'm jealous that at 36 he is still able to do that stuff. The thought of getting on a board sends waves of pain to my hips and knees. Even when I get new hips and have my knees worked on, I don't think I'll be doing any skateboarding. I just want to be able to walk down stairs without screaming.

See? I didn't do ANY of that stuff and I'm FINE.

kidsizedcoffin: Shiat, if it's going to be that kind of party, I'll just stick my dick in the mashed potatoes.

Exactly the quote I thought of.

Whoever wrote the law should see the 15 year olds these days. Also, anyone not surprised this happen to a proskater?

The profession most likely to have 15 year old throwing themselves at you:
-pro skater (or any other "extreme" sports)
-disney channel star
-MTV reality show cast
-John Meyer

/feel free to make your own list
//No, I don't condone sex with 15 year olds.

deevo: Whichever subby would describe coitus like that either has no knowledge of skateboards or no knowledge of sex, but possibly both.

Take a few blows to the head while skating, have we?

Dubya's_Coke_Dealer: Jamieboy: Never heard of him. He's 36 and still skating? At that age, doesn't he feel slightly out of place hanging out with a bunch of teens?

I quit the skateboard thing when I was about 31. Thanks to skateboarding, running, skiing, and snowboarding, my hips and knees are shot. I'm jealous that at 36 he is still able to do that stuff. The thought of getting on a board sends waves of pain to my hips and knees. Even when I get new hips and have my knees worked on, I don't think I'll be doing any skateboarding. I just want to be able to walk down stairs without screaming.

See? I didn't do ANY of that stuff and I'm FINE.

Exactly. That is why I just stay home and drink beer.

Keep it out of the news until he's convicted.

15 is considered "over the hill" in Japan.

Who isnt a pro-skater these days?

marius2: Who isnt a pro-skater these days? Steven Hawking, for one.

Goddamn I'm sick of that Hanson picture. But it's a worthy trade off for the jailbait pics.

looks like she didn't tell this sk8er-boi "see ya later"

/ashamed i even know that song

Korzine: FTA Brian Keith Patch, 36, of Westminster is facing felony charges for allegedly committing a lewd act with a 15-year-old girl.

WESTMINSTER - A professional skateboarder is facing a felony charge of committing a lewd act with a minor, officials said.

Brian Keith Patch, 36, of Westminster is accused of committing a lewd and lascivious act with a 15-year-old girl.

Who did what where now? Half this article is just one reiterated sentence.

This.

This.

This.

All media repeats itself ad nauseam. Learn to write detailed and coherent articles or GTFO. Is anyone else tired of this?

Dubya's_Coke_Dealer:

See? I didn't do ANY of that stuff and I'm FINE boring.

FTFY

downtownkid: marius2: Who isnt a pro-skater these days? Steven Hawking, for one.

I beg to differ!


/Shamelessly hotlinked!

Finally, somebody puts it in words I can understand!

If that dude had done this in Canada, he wouldn't be in trouble right now.

Brian Patch is kinda hot in a "about to age out of the only thing he's even remotely good at and even that's dubious" kind of way.
Too bad I'm significantly older than 15--he probably wouldn't want me.

Bunnya69: If that dude had done this in Canada, he wouldn't be in trouble right now.

Sure he would. 16 is now the age of consent.

I'm sure someone's uploaded it recently, but here's an updated map for your pedo-pleasure.

/thank your lucky stars if you don't live in Oman.