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(Daily Mail) Cool The wreck of the Titanic was only found after a top-secret mission to -BLAM- -BLAM- ++CARRIER LOST++   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 106
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curmudge 2008-05-24 07:27:19 PM  
FTFA: He concluded that the most likely cause of the Scorpion's destruction was being hit by a rogue torpedo it had fired itself. *cough cough bullshiat cough cough*

The USS Scorpio imploded on the way to the bottom which is highly unlikely to have happened if she had been hit by a torpedo.

 
Tr0mBoNe [TotalFark] 2008-05-24 07:35:33 PM  
curmudge: FTFA: He concluded that the most likely cause of the Scorpion's destruction was being hit by a rogue torpedo it had fired itself. *cough cough bullshiat cough cough*

The USS Scorpio imploded on the way to the bottom which is highly unlikely to have happened if she had been hit by a torpedo.


Ummmm try this. Take a soda bottle and put it under 1000 ft of water. Then tap it.

Under that kind of pressure, the torpedo would break the hull and then that instability would let the mountain of sea water crush the sub like a paper bag. Nothing explodes that far down... it breaks, then is crushed.

 
curmudge 2008-05-24 08:16:25 PM  
Tr0mBoNe:
Ummmm try this. Take a soda bottle and put it under 1000 ft of water. Then tap it.

Um no: Modern submarines are not soda pop bottles and the observed damage to the hull of the USS Scorpion is not consistent with the type of damage expected from a torpedo hit. One other minor thing I said implode not explode.

 
blazemongr 2008-05-24 10:12:05 PM  
Didn't another recent thread already debate the vital importance of three plus signs on either side of "Carrier Lost"?

/doesn't actually know
//or care, that much

 
blazemongr 2008-05-24 10:12:46 PM  
Wait a minute, it was a submarine lost, not a carrier....

 
wydok 2008-05-24 10:13:23 PM  
Holy shiat. That's kind of cool.

 
simpsonfan 2008-05-24 10:14:21 PM  
Back before he went really crazy, Howard Hughes was involved in something similar. The Glomar Challenger was a ship supposedly designed for undersea mining/drilling. CIA/US Navy etc actually used it to to try and raise a sunken Soviet sub. They found it, but were unable to get it complete to the surface. Maybe they got some stuff off it, not sure. I believe there was film of their service for the crew.

 
Dellirium 2008-05-24 10:14:43 PM  
What a surprise...

 
D-Wolf2k2 2008-05-24 10:15:17 PM  
Oh god people....

No farking wars over subs.

/I prefer mine with lots of salami, pepperoni, and other meats.
//On Wheat Bread please, I have to watch my figure.

 
Cyxneo 2008-05-24 10:16:02 PM  
Here comes the nuclear subs experts

 
TheRaven7 2008-05-24 10:17:37 PM  
I'm glad the Daily Fail promptly made this shocking discovery 23 years after the fact.

 
Dr. Quasius 2008-05-24 10:17:49 PM  
simpsonfan: Back before he went really crazy, Howard Hughes was involved in something similar. The Glomar Challenger was a ship supposedly designed for undersea mining/drilling. CIA/US Navy etc actually used it to to try and raise a sunken Soviet sub. They found it, but were unable to get it complete to the surface. Maybe they got some stuff off it, not sure. I believe there was film of their service for the crew.

There was a film of a burial at sea of it's crew by the CIA. When the Glomar Explorer was lifting the sub off of the bottom the missiles slipped out of their launch tubes and went to the bottom.

 
Tillmaster 2008-05-24 10:18:03 PM  
This is fairly old news, for what it's worth.

 
puffy999 [TotalFark] 2008-05-24 10:19:15 PM  
To UltraFa.... @%#%&^#

NO CARRIER

 
ultraholland 2008-05-24 10:22:59 PM  
Did the find the lost hoagies and and grinders?
/navy beans, navy beans

 
Gobobo 2008-05-24 10:23:08 PM  
You mean we only have two opposing experts on deep sea physics here on fark? It's unpossible!

 
Ball of Confusion 2008-05-24 10:27:08 PM  
Isn't an American sub just a glorified bologna and cheese sandwich?

Italian sub for a big bite of WIN.

+++ATH0

/for anyone still using them

 
Alured Popple 2008-05-24 10:28:00 PM  
To find the very rare mineral needed to complete the missile defense system, since the last of the Coloradoans had loaded it on after fighting off the french.

 
Outshined_One [TotalFark] 2008-05-24 10:28:57 PM  
I'm shocked at the lack of Red October references, especially given that the USS Scorpion was supposedly hit by one of its own torpedoes.

 
dennysgod 2008-05-24 10:30:12 PM  
Maybe the torpedo story was really a cover up because the Capitan and the command crew on board wanted to defect.

 
JonnyBGoode 2008-05-24 10:30:27 PM  
Five...

Five dollar...

Five dollar foot longs!

 
faefrost 2008-05-24 10:30:54 PM  
Nothing new here. This has been public knowlege for years. A very good book on it is Blind Mans Bluff by Sherry Sontag and Christopher Drew.

In the case of teh Scorpion, speculation is not that it was struck by a torpedo that it fired, rather that a torpedo that was aboard the ship shorted and started a "hot run" and exploded while still inside the ship.

 
SirFire 2008-05-24 10:31:55 PM  
I'm the king of the world!

 
Nightmaretony 2008-05-24 10:32:23 PM  
Did the website just barely get their copy of Ballard's book RETURN TO TITANIC where he told about the missions?

FAIL

 
mesohorny 2008-05-24 10:33:11 PM  
Cyxneo: Here comes the nuclear subs experts

The titanic was a inside job! Metal > ice!!!!

//so says a pirate

 
TeddyRooseveltsMustache [TotalFark] 2008-05-24 10:34:16 PM  
z.about.com

What about the Edmund Fitzgerald?

 
Blues_Fan 2008-05-24 10:34:32 PM  
Dr. Quasius:

There was a film of a burial at sea of it's crew by the CIA. When the Glomar Explorer was lifting the sub off of the bottom the missiles slipped out of their launch tubes and went to the bottom.


Imagine the pucker in the butt of the folks watching THAT on the TV screens that were sure to be there.

 
Anagrammer 2008-05-24 10:35:17 PM  
Look, if he was dying, he wouldn't bother to type "-BLAM- -BLAM-" He'd just hear it!

Well, that's what's typed in the headline!

Perhaps he was dictating.

 
Gunz_drawn 2008-05-24 10:35:39 PM  
JonnyBGoode: Five...

Five dollar...

Five dollar foot longs!


Damnit, I knew this would happen.

/hums to self
//five
//five dollar
///five dollar foot longs.

 
NewportBarGuy [TotalFark] 2008-05-24 10:36:17 PM  
img155.imageshack.us


"Andrei, you've lost another submarine?"

 
Anagrammer 2008-05-24 10:38:49 PM  
TeddyRooseveltsMustache: What about the Edmund Fitzgerald?

I can just see that discussion:

"Wow! So you're going to be looking all over the Atlantic?"

"Yep."

"What are you searching for?"

"Ummm . . . Errrr . . . the Edmund Fitzgerald."

"But that went down in Lake Superior."

"Yeah, we believe it, um, drifted."


/Shouldn't be that hard to find
//You could send some Lightfoot

 
Metaluna Mutant 2008-05-24 10:38:55 PM  
Actually, they were looking for that lost load of byzanium ore that went down with the Titanic back in 1912.

/thank god for southby

 
Future Emperor of Pennsylvania 2008-05-24 10:41:44 PM  
The hot rumor in Titanic circles is that the British Navy located the Titanic's wreck in 1978 on a secret mission to map submarine lanes in the Atlantic. After Ballard did the work to map the lost subs, the U.S. Navy (who got the location from the Brits) rewarded him by giving him a few "helpful hints" on where to look for the Titanic.

 
IAmSuperBeast 2008-05-24 10:46:14 PM  
Well, if no one else is gonna do this October quote...

"Torpedo dead ahead!"
"You arrogant ass, you've killed US!"

 
Gunz_drawn 2008-05-24 10:46:31 PM  
Future Emperor of Pennsylvania: The hot rumor in Titanic circles is that the British Navy located the Titanic's wreck in 1978 on a secret mission to map submarine lanes in the Atlantic. After Ballard did the work to map the lost subs, the U.S. Navy (who got the location from the Brits) rewarded him by giving him a few "helpful hints" on where to look for the Titanic.

And they said " Oh, here it is "

 
torquestripe 2008-05-24 10:46:57 PM  
The Titanic never existed. All that footage was filmed in a NASA sound stage aquarium somewhere.
Just look at the light angles, they defy physics.
And where are all of the starfish!
People will believe anything.

 
One F Jef 2008-05-24 10:47:39 PM  
++ EASY GREENLIGHT ++

This one isn't incredibly funny though. Sopranos versions are better. Fail, imo.

 
Dr.Salvador 2008-05-24 10:47:57 PM  
Snake- what's going on?
SNAKE?
SNAAAAAAAKKKEEEEEE!!!!!!

 
planes 2008-05-24 10:51:01 PM  
www.global-air.com

 
alacy52 2008-05-24 10:53:46 PM  
But did they find any rare gold coins I can buy off the TV?

 
ceejayoz 2008-05-24 10:54:08 PM  
nashBridges: You know something everybody else doesn't?

Huh?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/USS_Scorpion_(SSN-589)#Observed_damage

 
epyonyx 2008-05-24 10:54:38 PM  
The wreck of the Titanic was only found after a top-secret mission to -BLAM- -BLAM- ++CARRIER LOST++

Ultrafark?

 
DirtyDeadGhostofEbenezerCooke 2008-05-24 10:54:47 PM  
Here's the real story: the body of Leonardo di Caprio, drifting down for decades, became entangled into the USS Scorpion's diving planes, jamming them into the...uh...boat-go-down position. Fortunately, Indiana Jones let go of the periscope just before the final dive.

 
mksmith 2008-05-24 11:02:57 PM  
Ball of Confusion: Isn't an American sub just a glorified bologna and cheese sandwich?

Italian sub for a big bite of WIN.


Never had a New Orleans muffaletta, have you? Or stop in at the nearest "Subway" -- they're almost as ubiquitous as Starbucks.

 
Lusiphur 2008-05-24 11:08:15 PM  
Did someone say Scorpio?
/hotlinked because I'm lazy right now

 
medius [TotalFark] 2008-05-24 11:08:31 PM  
IAmSuperBeast: "You arrogant ass, you've killed US!"

well, that covers that

 
Lusiphur 2008-05-24 11:10:28 PM  
Lusiphur: Did someone say Scorpio?
/hotlinked because I'm lazy right now



Swing and a miss. Again, with no hotlinking this time.

img378.imageshack.us

 
Oznog 2008-05-24 11:11:02 PM  
curmudge: FTFA: He concluded that the most likely cause of the Scorpion's destruction was being hit by a rogue torpedo it had fired itself. *cough cough bullshiat cough cough*

www.internationalhero.co.uk
Maybe the wrestling was so bad that he cut his OWN head off.

 
DrForrester 2008-05-24 11:14:25 PM  
Rasheed just fouled out.

/forgot what thread I'm in

 
Doran 2008-05-24 11:16:52 PM  
Anagrammer: Look, if he was dying, he wouldn't bother to type "-BLAM- -BLAM-" He'd just hear it!

Well, that's what's typed in the headline!

Perhaps he was dictating.


Perhaps he was going to the Castle of Aaaaarghh.

 
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