FTFA: "While the new gig is her first in politics, her name already has been tossed around as a possible vice presidential running mate. McCain has said he's not as strong on economics as he is on national security, so he needs accomplished business leaders, like Fiorina, advising him."

It's only two sentences. How could they possibly contain so many bad ideas?

If he's considering her, then he really is senile.

Whiskey. Tango. Foxtrot.

Wouldn't she have been better paired with jesus georgie?

Sounds just like the GOP.

"The black guy is running, time to show off our token chick!"

Seriously, I thought NOTHING could make me EVER vote for Hillary.

Until this.

Merger: closer to the truth than you might think (new window).

shame subby shame.

/golfclap subby.

Oh, pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease! Do it, you senile old twit!

A female version of Bush?

Well it would be a smart move in a way. If the GOP takes woman as a VP, they'll grab a solid chunk of Hillary's supporters who are bitter over losing the primary.

nemisonic: Merger: closer to the truth than you might think (new window).

And by closer, you really mean "no chance in hell would this ever be voted on in Congress and will never get past the idea stage", right?

/...right?

I believe I speak for 90% of Fark:

So. Farking. What.

War_Kittens: Well it would be a smart move in a way. If the GOP takes woman as a VP, they'll grab a solid chunk of Hillary's supporters who are bitter over losing the primary.

True

This guy thinks the idea is nuts.

/pleaseohpleaseohplease

If McCain does go with Fiorina as his VP then I'll just write in Gene Simmons or someone equally as out there on my ballot this year. Obama is a nice guy and all, but I disagree with too many of his political stances to vote for the guy.

Wasn't this the chick that got in trouble for spying on boardmembers?

It was either her or the Dell Kid.

nemisonic:

It would eliminate the immigration problem with Mexico, as everyone knows McCain is against any immigration reform! It would also do away with the cheap prescription prices from Canada.

/neo-cons suck!
//Gobama!

Nestea Plunge: Only woman to turn a can't-fail top 5 computer company into clownfest.

Only woman to have been given the chance. I'm sure any others would do as well.

The United Canadian and American States? I, for one, welcome our dragon overlords.

She is a loser and is not being considered as McCain's VP. This is just a Democrat jedi mind trick. Silly, silly, silly.

Canaduh and The States Merge?
The cops and government don't pay much attention to our Constitution either.
And we have Asian/Mexicans already. Unless you count the Fruit pickers from the country of Queerbec.
And we don't need any new laws against out Glaucoma medication.

"CEO" and "HP" were the only two words I needed to read.

nemisonic: Merger: closer to the truth than you might think (new window).

Hear hear! You know those fat cats in Washington want nothing more than to link our economy to a well managed nation like Mexico!

I bet those Canadians cannot wait to succumb to our monetary policy and assume responsibility for our debt. I'm sure they can't wait to endander their traditional manufacturing advantage created by their lower currency valuation! Those Canadians are like that. They've wanted to be a part of our country forever because they love us so much.

I know the headline was a joke (regarding the Canada thing) but that's kinda in the works right now. Google North American Union, it's not just some crazy conspiracy theory, it's something the govt is tryna force us into without letting us consent to it. New World Order people, it's going on whether you wanna believe it or not.

/Know I sound crazy right now, but just watch the signs.

Does this mean the government will operate as bad as my printer?

/laughs at headline

Now HERE is a FAIL thread.

The CPQ buyout wasn't the problem. That actually bought HP a good place in the Intel server market.

Her being a raging biatch and trying to spin off divisions into different companies were the problems.

She was on Snufalopopos this weekend and she's about as smarmy as they come.

TheJoe03: I know the headline was a joke (regarding the Canada thing) but that's kinda in the works right now. Google North American Union, it's not just some crazy conspiracy theory, it's something the govt is tryna force us into without letting us consent to it. New World Order people, it's going on whether you wanna believe it or not.

/Know I sound crazy right now, but just watch the signs.

I heard that the UN put secret markings on the back of our street signs so that the tanks will know where to go when they get here. The UN is totally going to take over our country! I'm so scared because I have never seen a more capable and effective fighting force than the UN. Just you wait. This will all happen once the head of the EU is revealed as the Antichrist!

It will be Joe Lieberman.

But a red, white and blue ipod would look sharp.

I saw this a couple of days ago and thought it was speculation and/or wishful thinking. Now that it is gaining some traction, it scares me. With the Dems doing everything they can to lose in November (infighting, drawn out primary), the Republicans are doing all they can to get on the crazy bandwagon. All the slogans stolen from anti-depressant pills in the world won't fix this trainwreck.

Presenting the voters with "grandpa and the world's worst CEO" and "that closet Muslim with the racist preacher and ties to a radical american terrorist + the mill worker with purty hair and a new jet ski (if he gets a second stab at VPing)" as the two major choices this fall will show we are a one party with two names country.

Does this mean that printer ink and gasoline will achieve price parity?

GoodasGold:

It will be Joe Lieberman.

That works for me, too. Just so long as it's someone who makes an already bad candidate even worse, I'm good.

Carly Fiorina, ex-CEO of HP, may be in the running to be McCain's running mate. Among her proposals: a costly, inadvisable merger with Canada that backfires and leaves both countries in worse shape

Is she the ex-CEO of HP who was forced to resign after allegations that she was spying on her board of directors?

War_Kittens: Well it would be a smart move in a way. If the GOP takes woman as a VP, they'll grab a solid chunk of Hillary's supporters who are bitter over losing the primary.

Exactly. This way even if the Obaminator picks Hillary for his VP Cain will have a white woman on his team who appeals to rich right-leaning moderate white women even more than Hillary. He has to go for the moderates to win this election. Screw you; I'm eating!

If anyone would have sold us out it would have been Cluess Capellas (Michael Capellas), a name we gave him at Compaq.

Aaand suddenly, with the potential Obama/Edwards vs McCain/Fiorina tickets, we're back to the giant douche vs turd sandwich race...

Let's get out and vote!
Let's make our voices heard.
We've been given the right to choose,
between a douche and a turd.
It's democracy in action!
Put your freedom to the test.
A big fat turd or a stupid douche,
which do you like best?

Ugh.

John Paul Jones: FTFA: "While the new gig is her first in politics, her name already has been tossed around as a possible vice presidential running mate. McCain has said he's not as strong on economics as he is on national security, so he needs accomplished business leaders, like Fiorina, advising him."

It's only two sentences. How could they possibly contain so many bad ideas?

Goddamn that's funny.

I enjoyed this:

Still, supporters say Fiorina has been vindicated by HP's success since her firing.

Rather like saying your sexual technique was vindicated by your ex's many orgasms with her new boyfriend . . .

mama's_tasty_foods: I enjoyed this:

Still, supporters say Fiorina has been vindicated by HP's success since her firing.

Rather like saying your sexual technique was vindicated by your ex's many orgasms with her new boyfriend . . .

Win.

I worked for HP during the Canada outsourcing, and all I can say about this is:

fark this biatch!

TheNewJesus: Sounds just like the GOP.

"The black guy is running, time to show off our token chick!"

Ayup. "Hmmm...lots of Hillary supporters are pissed off at the DNC right now...what could we do to sweeten the deal for them to join the dark side?"

No matter that the candidates in question suck or anything. It's of little importance. Voters are dumb that way. Just ask Alan Keyes.

If you don't know who Carly Fiorina is, or what she has done, allow me to summarize.

If she were the VP candidate on a ticket with Jesus, endorsed by Boutros Boutros Ghali, and rode a unicorn instead of a car to limit her carbon footprint-I still would not vote for her.

She strives for incompetence and yearns for catastrophes.

This is a bi-partisan matter as far as I'm concerned.

FTFA:After running one of Silicon Valley's powerhouse companies for six years, into the ground, Carly Fiorina now has her sights set on the White House.

FTFT

Yeah... Canada wants to join your sinking ship...