She's single! I'm first in line!

Alison Krauss > All women singers

Just look at them now....

He served his purpose. She's moving on.

BobtheFascist: He served his purpose. She's moving on.

This. Time for her to hire a new producer find a new husband.

Suicidal Writer: Alison Krauss > All women singers

I am partial to Charlotte Church, myself.

It's sad to see love between two mutts fade.

She don't impress me much.

If you're a guy and you don't think she's hot, you're gay.

bulldg4life: She's single! I'm first in line!

Met her once, about 8 years ago. Hotter in person than anywhere else you've seen her.

Let the fight begin.

That impresses the fark out of me, because now I have more of a chance than I did yesterday! fark all y'all!

Not a fan of her music, but she's smokin'.

I guess he's not still the one anymore.

Oh man, I had a huge crush on her back in the late 90s.... Yowza. I would be in line for that. Even way in back, I don't care.

True story:

Shania hates mayo all right, and she can't eat chicken salad, thats no joke. We gave it to her once, she threw up in the limo - the lady hates chicken salad. So I bring out a bunch of tuna fish sandwiches - she still doesn't believe me - I say, Shania, I'm allergic to mayo - which, by the way, is a lie. Shania still doesn't believe me so I eat two of the sandwiches in front of her to prove it. So she eats one and a half sandwiches, one and a half sandwiches... before she realizes, its chicken salad.

So does this mean that he can go back to producing AC/DC?

mysticcat: If you're a guy and you don't think she's hot, you're gay.

Correct.

I met her about 6 years ago in Detroit. Wasn't overly friendly but wasn't a beotch either. She was nice to my 4 yr.old daughter and called her "sweetie"! She's still hot!

I'd post the pic if I knew how...

Opiate of the Lasses: True story:

Shania hates mayo all right, and she can't eat chicken salad, thats no joke. We gave it to her once, she threw up in the limo - the lady hates chicken salad. So I bring out a bunch of tuna fish sandwiches - she still doesn't believe me - I say, Shania, I'm allergic to mayo - which, by the way, is a lie. Shania still doesn't believe me so I eat two of the sandwiches in front of her to prove it. So she eats one and a half sandwiches, one and a half sandwiches... before she realizes, its chicken salad.

Why do you think that you tell the mayo story so much?

pestluvr: Why do you think that you tell the mayo story so much?

How am I not myself?

/just rewatched that movie earlier today
//everything really is connected like a blanket

I'd Shania her twain.

/what?

om nom nom nom

/fap
//fapfap
///fapfapfap

He is 16 years older than her. She did not like the prospect of pushing his drooling ass around in a wheelchair within the next 10-15 years.

Lets see First Jodi Foster is single, my great state legalizes gay marriage, and now surprise Shania is single. Coincidense? I think not. I'll be in my bunk.

Opiate of the Lasses: True story:

Shania hates mayo all right, and she can't eat chicken salad, thats no joke. We gave it to her once, she threw up in the limo - the lady hates chicken salad. So I bring out a bunch of tuna fish sandwiches - she still doesn't believe me - I say, Shania, I'm allergic to mayo - which, by the way, is a lie. Shania still doesn't believe me so I eat two of the sandwiches in front of her to prove it. So she eats one and a half sandwiches, one and a half sandwiches... before she realizes, its chicken salad.

So..... The point is you're an asshole?

First I saw her was on some awards show ten years ago when she was wearing the 'woman's version' of a tuxedo, with the top hat and the veil attached to it.

She sang 'Man, I feel like a woman'
yeah, just sang the shiat out of it, let me tell you...

Pardon me, I just remembered somthing I gotta do...

(f a p...f a p... fapfapfap....FAP!)

Dumb-Ass-Monkey: Opiate of the Lasses: True story:

Shania hates mayo all right, and she can't eat chicken salad, thats no joke. We gave it to her once, she threw up in the limo - the lady hates chicken salad. So I bring out a bunch of tuna fish sandwiches - she still doesn't believe me - I say, Shania, I'm allergic to mayo - which, by the way, is a lie. Shania still doesn't believe me so I eat two of the sandwiches in front of her to prove it. So she eats one and a half sandwiches, one and a half sandwiches... before she realizes, its chicken salad.

So..... The point is you're an asshole?

You, sir, fail! Ha ha ha!

Have you ever transcended time and space?

I'd let her wear the bonnet.

Time, not space. Or, space, not time. Or, I don't know what you're talking about.

coping with fame



boo hoo

I'd put something on her OxyClean wouldn't take off.

mutt lange ruined the cars.

Suicidal Writer: Alison Krauss > All women singers

Really like Krauss, but I have to tip my hat to Mary Chapin Carpenter.

/not the stuff you hear on the radio, either.

How about Alison and Shania Together?

Shania Twain & Alison Krauss - Forever And For Always (new window)

Really, not that bad. But Alison looks insanely hot in this video. Just ignore the dirty old hippy she's singing with.

The official video to "Please Read the Letter" (new window)

I don't know if she's wearing a mini or shorts, but wow. In my bunk, I will be ensconced.

I'd knock the bottom out of that shiat.

I'd throw you all into a wood chipper just for a single date with her. Well not really, cause you're all cool. But don't get in my way.

I'm still the one she runs to, the one who she belongs to. I'm still the one she kisses goodnight.


So the line starts behind me.

Wight on time you pulled into town
Countwy's queen of the twacks
I wonged to meet you down at the station
For me there was no holding back
But it must've been fate
I got stopped at the gate
You just passed me by
As I fought to bweak woose
To gwab the caboose
All I could do is cwy:

I wanna wide, wide, wide, wide, wide on Shania's twain
I wanna wide, wide, wide, wide, wide on Shania's twain
I wanna wook at your twain
Hop on your twain
Stwetch out on your twain
Eat a snack on your twain
I wanna wide, wide, wide, wide, wide on Shania's twain!

Folderol:

Met her once, about 8 years ago. Hotter in person than anywhere else you've seen her.


True, She is much hotter in person. I met her on serveral occasions while I was working at awards shows during college. She jokingly used me as a human shield once to seperate her from some fans. Ahh the good days.

Moses To Sandy Koufax: I'm still the one she runs to, the one who she belongs to. I'm still the one she kisses goodnight.


So the line starts behind me.

Who are you? Her crack pipe?

davynelson
coping with fame
boo hoo

...

..so she got a divorce, and you're the one b*tching?

sounds like you're trying to cope with her fame, genius.

man, i'd love to tap that.

Kiribub: Suicidal Writer: Alison Krauss > All women singers

I am partial to Charlotte Church, myself.

My sister has sung vocals on her albums and went on tour with her once as backup singer. She's a real prima donna to work with, but my sister said that she was actually ok at the bar. Fortunately that tour was in Europe so I had a good excuse not to go.

/love my sister's voice but not a fan of that type of music.

Shania Twain = Fran Drescher without the annoying parts

/angry farmer style

Shania is pretty hot. ..but Gretchen Wilson is 100% my speed...core meltdown.

Shania Twain = Super MILF. WANT!!!!!

Mutt Lange = Have a lot of respect for him, since he was the music producer for AC/DC. Fark yeah.

Like the old saying goes....No matter how beautiful she is, no matter how fine, some guy somewhere is sick and tired of dealing with her shiat.

/bottom line