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(Dayton Daily News) Weird Wal-Mart store detective gives chase to woman who shoplifted baby wipes. Stroller overturns, discharging baby and wipes. Mother clobbers detective with baby wipes. Then it gets weird   (daytondailynews.com) divider line 90
More: Weird  

90 Comments   (+0 »)


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dletter [TotalFark] 2008-05-11 02:55:47 PM  
Although it doesn't mention it at all, I'd put a few bucks on these two being Irish Traveler's.

 
strangeguitar 2008-05-11 03:07:38 PM  
dletter: Although it doesn't mention it at all, I'd put a few bucks on these two being Irish Traveler's.

Are those like Pikeys?
i227.photobucket.com

 
ExJerseyGirl [TotalFark] 2008-05-11 03:21:03 PM  
dletter: Although it doesn't mention it at all, I'd put a few bucks on these two being Irish Traveler's.

Huh? Please explain.

 
Lew Stool 2008-05-11 04:13:23 PM  
ExJerseyGirl: dletter: Although it doesn't mention it at all, I'd put a few bucks on these two being Irish Traveler's.

Huh? Please explain.


This article (pops) will give you an idea.

hardwarelogic.com

 
dletter [TotalFark] 2008-05-11 04:26:03 PM  
strangeguitar: dletter: Although it doesn't mention it at all, I'd put a few bucks on these two being Irish Traveler's.

Are those like Pikeys?


From what I can tell on Wikipedia, they are pretty close (both Gypsy type groups).

/although your movie reference probably means you already knew that

 
Chad Michael Murray 2008-05-11 04:56:41 PM  
I'd kinda like to play the part of the store detective in the Lifetime movie about this.

 
skinink 2008-05-11 04:57:28 PM  
"Ma'am, you got a panty on yer head."

 
JuicenX 2008-05-11 04:57:42 PM  
sucks the baby has to pay for it's deadbeat mother who can't even afford wal-mart merchandise

 
Funk Brothers 2008-05-11 04:59:12 PM  
Geez...this going from bad to worse for the state of Ohio today.

 
RoyBatty 2008-05-11 04:59:55 PM  
When did it get weird? I was expecting them to find a 2000 rolled up wipes up her butt like the guy from yesterfark....

(phillydrifter, tell the stick on the left that by hitting "esc" it will stop.)

 
ultraholland 2008-05-11 05:02:58 PM  
[armchair lawyer]

I'm pretty sure you can only be charged with concealment if you haven't left the premises with the goods. She could have just said that she put them in there so she could keep her hands free, and perhaps gotten off with a warning.

[/armchair lawyer]

RE Travelers:

I saw a bunch in western Ireland. Many entrances to parks have low gates that only cars can drive under so as to prevent the damn gypsies from bringing their caravans in. Apparently they set up shop for a period of time, trash the place and move on like locusts.

 
The Angry Hand of God 2008-05-11 05:03:42 PM  
Wal-Mart store detective gives chase to woman who shoplifted baby wipes. Stroller overturns, discharging baby and wipes. Mother clobbers detective with baby wipes. Then it gets weird

There ya go RoyBatty, thats when it got weird.

 
jack21221 2008-05-11 05:08:57 PM  
The Aristocrats!!

 
Chastain86 2008-05-11 05:09:44 PM  
Way to set yourselves up for a public-relations nightmare over two bucks worth of wet paper towels, idiot.

 
zhinz1 2008-05-11 05:13:27 PM  
Oh, the store workers are the idiots, huh? As opposed to the woman who decided to steal something while pushing a stroller.

/i see how this works.
//not really

 
RoyBatty 2008-05-11 05:14:29 PM  
The Angry Hand of God: Wal-Mart store detective gives chase to woman who shoplifted baby wipes. Stroller overturns, discharging baby and wipes. Mother clobbers detective with baby. Then it gets weird.

shiat! That is weird!

 
Phony_Soldier 2008-05-11 05:16:38 PM  
Well, rather than get into a high speed pursuit, they should have gotten the plate off the stroller and arrested the perp at her home.

High speed chases put us all in danger.

 
sexy-fetus 2008-05-11 05:17:50 PM  
I helped my bestfriends sister carry her stroller up some stairs and pulled my side a little too high dumping the baby onto the cement stairs. Scared me shiatless since it wasn't crying untill mom picked him up.
This doesn't add anything to the conversation here, but it reminded me.

 
CruJones 2008-05-11 05:19:34 PM  
Phony_Soldier: Well, rather than get into a high speed pursuit, they should have gotten the plate off the stroller and arrested the perp at her home.

High speed chases put us all in danger.


did you read a different article, because the one linked didn't mention a high speed chase, just that she got pulled over while driving down the street.

 
puffy999 [TotalFark] 2008-05-11 05:19:48 PM  
I bet she sues.

 
justinthebull 2008-05-11 05:19:55 PM  
We see here what people have been reduced to thanks to George W. Bush's disastrous economic policies. Thanks.

 
MAYORBOB 2008-05-11 05:25:26 PM  
Then it gets weird.

In what way? According to the report, she and her gal pal got arrested.

 
Harry Freakstorm 2008-05-11 05:25:26 PM  
NFL Loudmouth 1: It's a beautiful day here at Walmart #1245. The sun is out and we are expecting a lot of action on the field today.

NFL Loudmouth 2: You said it. We have Loss Prevention Dective Lou Dankel in the game today. He is 25 and 0 for the last quarter.

NFL Loudmouth 1: That is an eviable record. The kind of record that makes most shoplifter go on down to Walmart #1246. It's only three blocks away.

NFL Loudmouth2: But it also brings out the pros. How would you like to go in to the books as the guy who ended Dankel's best season?

NFL Loudmouth1: You are so right. Dankel is going to have to bring his A game. And it looks like we have someone. That guy on camera 45. He's been fingering those batteries for some time.

NFL Loudmouth 2: Look at Camera 62. That lady just shoved a pack of baby wipes in the stroller. That's aisle 16. Dankel in right there but his back was turned, He was watching the Hispanic guy. Wait! He's turning.

NFL Loudmouth 1: Hate to see his record go away with a $2.50 pack of baby wipes. Looks like he's moving to intercept. She has an accomplice. I think you are going to see some blocking here.

NFL Loudmouth 2: He cuts past the blocker! It's just Dankel between the the lady with the baby wipes and freedom. Dankel is closing in. Oh! Look at her go. That is not a regulation stroller.

NFL Loudmouth 1: Oh! What just happened? The lady was going so fast, she tripped on the stroller and the is infant on the field! There is an infant in play! Look at that! She just latteralled the infant to the blocker. That is going on the highlight roll.

NFL Loudmouth 2: Dankel has her. Looks like it's all over. No! She hits Dankel with the baby wipes! Dankel is down! Dankel is down and they are in to the parking lot.

NFL Loudmouth 1: Cops are there. Looks like someone on Dankel's team phoned it in. Dankel's record is now 26 and zero. He must be feeling pretty good right now.

NFL Loudmouth 2: Lets go back to the start of this for the slo mo...

 
Migaloo 2008-05-11 05:28:20 PM  
As long as she didn't steal no Morton's or Duracell's her case will be acquitted.

 
Open_Mouth_Inert_Foot 2008-05-11 05:28:38 PM  
justinthebull


are ya trolling, cause if you are, I'll be liberal and give ya a 2.5 for effort.

crap like this has gone on for years in good times and bad, no need to blame el presidente

 
jj325 [TotalFark] 2008-05-11 05:29:20 PM  
WalMart has store detectives? Funny thing is, the guy who switched prices to get his big screen TV for 100.00 probably got away while Sherlock Holmes was trying to nab the baby-wipe bandit.

 
Migaloo 2008-05-11 05:36:33 PM  
dletter: I'd put a few bucks on these two being Irish Traveler's.

Are you referring to those Katrina Irish, if so I concur.

 
MisfitDoctor 2008-05-11 05:38:05 PM  
This story would have gotten a [Funny] tag if the baby had fallen out and gotten trampled to death by the Walk-Mart security guard. The mother loses a kid due to her theft, but wins a million dollar settlement and she never has to steal baby wipes again for a baby that she doesn't have anymore. TEE HEE!

 
RubHerDuck 2008-05-11 05:40:58 PM  
Harry Freakstorm: Play by play words...

That was great! Highly comical!

 
Jeff Bobaganoosh 2008-05-11 05:45:43 PM  
dletter: Although it doesn't mention it at all, I'd put a few bucks on these two being Irish Traveler's.

So what is being possessed by the Irish Traveler?

 
thefrailandwretched 2008-05-11 05:47:20 PM  
So she turned a misdemeanor shoplifting theft into felony burglary.

Must be the man keeping her down.

 
Anaiya 2008-05-11 05:51:03 PM  
I wonder if the charges will be changed once the DA gets hold of the case. Robbery wasn't the best choice. Robbery means you stole something through violence or intimidation. She didn't get violent until after the theft and didn't bother taking the item, so theft and assault would seem more accurate in this case. She's very likely to get off if they stick with that charge.

ultraholland: [armchair lawyer]

I'm pretty sure you can only be charged with concealment if you haven't left the premises with the goods. She could have just said that she put them in there so she could keep her hands free, and perhaps gotten off with a warning.

[/armchair lawyer]


This is true in many cases, but some areas have laws that consider anything you conceal or open without first purchasing stolen. So, all you parents that like to grab the box of animal crackers, goldfish, or whatever and give it to your kiddo to munch as you shop without first buying it, you could be charged with theft of that item depending on the laws in your area. This is true also of drinks if you decide to open it before you get to the checkout.

 
HoratioGates 2008-05-11 05:52:43 PM  
Farktastic job reading the article subby. You're ready for a job a the DMV.

 
CrackrJak 2008-05-11 05:53:46 PM  
Clearly not a "Mother of the Year" nominee

 
swahnhennessy 2008-05-11 06:05:57 PM  
What a sad story.

 
zez 2008-05-11 06:07:44 PM  
upload.wikimedia.org

wanted for questioning

 
Swede 2008-05-11 06:08:51 PM  
No Irish Travelers need apply.

 
dogslobber buttlube 2008-05-11 06:13:49 PM  
The Blessed Mother cries when mothers are chasd. Have you no mercy at all? No sympathy or empathy?
weeping and leaving
=Margaret=

 
JoeShow 2008-05-11 06:17:08 PM  
Anaiya

Robbery was the best choice, she got violent during the process of the theft, she was still on wal mart property and was still in the process of committing the crime.

she wasn't sitting at home and attacked a wal mart employee who knocked on her door asking for the product back a couple days after she got away with the theft



/works loss prevention
//needs a real job again

 
sparticle 2008-05-11 06:18:33 PM  
Swede: No Irish Travelers need apply.

dletter: Although it doesn't mention it at all, I'd put a few bucks on these two being Irish Traveler's.

Sure, Dayton is rife with 'em. (I keed.)

Travelers are also called Tinkers. When I was a girl (yes, and get off my lawn), it was a great insult in our emigrant/first-generation Irish neighborhood to be called a Tinker.

"Wash your face, you dirty little Tinker."

"Jesus, I'm not going anywhere like this; I look like a Tinker."

"I wouldn't get in with that crowd; they all steal like Tinkers."

Even though we were dirt poor working class Irish, it was good to have a group of our own to look down on.

/ended sentence with preposition.
//ya have a problem with that? C'mere.

 
stiletto_the_wise 2008-05-11 06:27:38 PM  
What the hell was he doing "giving chase"?? Those loss-prevention douchenozzles in retail stores have absolutely no authority to detain you or even touch you, let alone "give chase".

Whenever one of them wants to (illegally) stop and (illegally) search me, I just say "no thanks" and keep on walking. Most of them are at least trained well enough to know to let it go.

 
gund 2008-05-11 06:35:19 PM  
I hope she sues. Can claim she forgot about the wipes, got chased by someone in plain clothes (who was screaming and looked like a murdering maniac who wanted to steal her baby), injured her baby, tried to defend herself from him, and ran off.

If I was on the jury I could believe that. Reasonable doubt and all.

/At least be a pig, being a store detective looks really bad on your resume. You fail at life so badly you can't get into the academy?

 
NYZooMan 2008-05-11 06:35:58 PM  
WIPE OUT!

 
Thats an 827 2008-05-11 06:38:53 PM  
Plagiarize Raising Arizona?

 
JoeShow 2008-05-11 06:39:30 PM  
What the hell was he doing "giving chase"?? Those loss-prevention douchenozzles in retail stores have absolutely no authority to detain you or even touch you, let alone "give chase".


i guess i should tell every company i have ever worked for about your version of what a loss prevention douchenozzle has the authority to do.

/i hate my job

 
Anaiya 2008-05-11 06:39:32 PM  
JoeShow: Anaiya

Robbery was the best choice, she got violent during the process of the theft, she was still on wal mart property and was still in the process of committing the crime.

she wasn't sitting at home and attacked a wal mart employee who knocked on her door asking for the product back a couple days after she got away with the theft



/works loss prevention
//needs a real job again


Do you follow the cases once they leave the premises? Just curious. I have a minor in business law and it was common practice at the local DA's office to adjust the charges alleged criminals were arrested for because of minor details such as these.

It's possible the robbery charge sticks, but DAs like to have something that will stick without much question. If she goes before a jury, they will be given the law as it is written to determine if the charge is accurate to her circumstance. Since it wasn't her intent to use violence or intimidation to steal the item, the jury would be more apt to convict her on assault and theft/shoplifting charges than they would on robbery charges.

I'm not saying it wasn't a fine charge to arrest her on, just that it may not be the best charge to convict her with.

 
Tony326 2008-05-11 06:43:44 PM  
HoratioGates: Farktastic job reading the article subby. You're ready for a job a the DMV.

??

Makes sense to me.

"The subject ran with the baby stroller when confronted by the complainant, and the stroller tipped over. She took the baby out and handed it to a female who was with her. The subject then struck the complainant in the face with the container of baby wipes."

Unless you're arguing about whether or not the baby was actually "discharged" during the overturning.

 
djdole 2008-05-11 06:49:23 PM  
...then it gets weird?
What, was the baby a midget in a diaper?
allaboutmidgets.typepad.com

Definitely reading this article...but it had better be good. :-p

 
JoeShow 2008-05-11 06:51:22 PM  
I hope she sues. Can claim she forgot about the wipes, got chased by someone in plain clothes (who was screaming and looked like a murdering maniac who wanted to steal her baby), injured her baby, tried to defend herself from him, and ran off.

If I was on the jury I could believe that. Reasonable doubt and all.

/At least be a pig, being a store detective looks really bad on your resume. You fail at life so badly you can't get into the academy?



or the real version

1. lady selected product
2. lady put product in stroller not shopping cart continues shopping
3. lady paid for other products
4. lady exits store
5. LP confronts lady saying he is LP and would like to talk to her inside about the unpaid merchandise
6. lady causes a scene and runs off
7. LP runs after her while calling police and gets assaulted by lady
8. lady gets arrested by police


If the lady had been dragged back into the store i would agree with you, but in reality Wal Mart LP's are trained to not drag people back in kicking and screaming - the last time the company allowed that they killed a couple people in the parking lot.

How does being employed look bad on my resume? Not everyone who is a LP wants to be a cop or even cares about the law, i work with two ladies who just wanted a day job and didnt want to refold clothes and deal with the general public

it looks better than on a resume than flipping burgers and it pays better

/i really hate my job
//have been recruited by police departments in every major city in texas (and a few small ones) and still dont want to be a cop
//its a job til i can pay all my bills with my own company, or i find a better one

 
djdole 2008-05-11 06:52:28 PM  
djdole: it had better be good

:-( Disappointed.
Even Seinfeld had a better ending.

 
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