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(Slashdot) Scary Taser corp. wins lawsuit. People no longer die of tasings, instead die of "excited delirium", a cause that doesn't appear in medical textbooks, only in police reports   (yro.slashdot.org) divider line 339
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netweavr [TotalFark] 2008-05-04 11:29:42 AM  
"excited delirium",

Commas go inside quotation marks.

 
discount sushi 2008-05-04 11:36:18 AM  
I'm really glad this non-lethal weapon for the police is used so freely and in circumstances in which it's rarely warranted.

 
panfried [TotalFark] 2008-05-04 11:45:23 AM  

Well, if you don't RESIST, you don't get tazed, bro!

Stop RESISTING!

 
VictoryCabal [TotalFark] 2008-05-04 11:51:32 AM  
It was only a matter of time of course. A weapon intended to be used as a less-lethal alternative to shooting people has morphed into a device to compel compliance. With unsuprising results.

 
SilentStrider [TotalFark] 2008-05-04 11:53:20 AM  
tasers don't kill people, excited delirium kills people.

 
unnaturalcravings 2008-05-04 11:54:46 AM  
Oh cool a new medical condition. Glaxo Smith Klyne will soon have medication for it, and all of the commercials will be vague enough so everyone thinks they have it.

 
funsized 2008-05-04 12:02:41 PM  
"Excited delirium" sounds very similar to what the Victorians invented vibrators for.

 
penthesilea [TotalFark] 2008-05-04 12:08:40 PM  
I'm delirious with excitement, bro.

 
SpinStopper [TotalFark] 2008-05-04 12:44:03 PM  
All too often, officers use a taser as if it were a sedative.

Umm, no.

 
Weaver95 [TotalFark] 2008-05-04 12:47:34 PM  
VictoryCabal: It was only a matter of time of course. A weapon intended to be used as a less-lethal alternative to shooting people has morphed into a device to compel compliance. With unsuprising results.

Did you expect otherwise?

 
VictoryCabal [TotalFark] 2008-05-04 12:52:39 PM  
Weaver95: Did you expect otherwise?

I wish I could say that I did expect otherwise, but I've learned to expect the worst.

 
Weaver95 [TotalFark] 2008-05-04 12:56:07 PM  
VictoryCabal: Weaver95: Did you expect otherwise?

I wish I could say that I did expect otherwise, but I've learned to expect the worst.


we like to think that we're not ugly, brutal and violent....but the truth is that we're not as 'civilized' as we pretend. Gitmo and CIA run prisons and the war on drugs are uncomfortable reminders of that fact. But as long as we've got hi-def TVs and world of warcraft, society won't care if we taser people on simple traffic stops or bust down the wrong door on a drug raid and kill an innocent person.

 
vudukungfu 2008-05-04 01:10:22 PM  
netweavr: "excited delirium",

Commas go inside quotation marks.


your fly is down.

 
Genta [TotalFark] 2008-05-04 01:18:16 PM  
Weaver95: VictoryCabal: Weaver95: Did you expect otherwise?

I wish I could say that I did expect otherwise, but I've learned to expect the worst.

we like to think that we're not ugly, brutal and violent....but the truth is that we're not as 'civilized' as we pretend. Gitmo and CIA run prisons and the war on drugs are uncomfortable reminders of that fact. But as long as we've got hi-def TVs and world of warcraft, society won't care if we taser people on simple traffic stops or bust down the wrong door on a drug raid and kill an innocent person.



you didnt take your soma this morning did you?

 
MeaninglessMoniker 2008-05-04 01:19:11 PM  
I get delirious whenever you're near
Lose all self-control, baby, just can't steer
Wheels get locked in place
Get a stupid look on my face
When it comes to tazin' my ass, pretty mama
I just can't win a race

 
Pluvius 2008-05-04 01:19:22 PM  
I'm guessing now neither guns nor bullets kill people, just excessive blood loss and trauma caused by bullets.

You gotta love the obtuseness of the judicial system sometimes.

Rob

 
tatum 2008-05-04 01:19:23 PM  
Firing metal prongs into a human and sending a few thousand volts of electricity into the uncooperative bastard SEEMED like a good idea at the time.

Should we not have done that?

 
xuanzhiyouxuan 2008-05-04 01:23:42 PM  
Tasers restore the body's natural flow of bio-electricity. When you are being tasered, the cop is actually sealing the upper chakras so that the soul cannot escape the body in what is called "excited delerium."

 
fernandez 2008-05-04 01:24:18 PM  
netweavr

"excited delirium",

Commas go inside quotation marks.


grammar "nazi,"

 
Hal B. Sure 2008-05-04 01:25:37 PM  
unnaturalcravings: Oh cool a new medical condition. Glaxo Smith Klyne will soon have medication for it, and all of the commercials will be vague enough so everyone thinks they have it.

Do you ever notice your heart beating faster? Have you ever noticed a clear liquid being excreted from your forehead or under arms? Have you ever become irritated? If so, you may suffer from 'excited delirium', a potentially fatal condition.

Even if you've only noticed just one of these symptoms, please ask you doctor Golaidoun.

 
prgrmr 2008-05-04 01:25:38 PM  
Max: You killed him?
Vincent: No, I shot him. Bullets and the fall killed him.

 
Inspector Juve 2008-05-04 01:26:03 PM  
discount sushi: I'm really glad this non-lethal weapon for the police is used so freely and in circumstances in which it's rarely warranted.

As long as they film it and put it on YouTube, I'm ok with it.

 
Sgt Otter [TotalFark] 2008-05-04 01:26:43 PM  
netweavr: "excited delirium",

Commas go inside quotation marks.


I think it's acceptable in British grammar rules.

 
MonkeyVegetables [TotalFark] 2008-05-04 01:27:16 PM  
papers please citizen

/no?
//thats an "excited deliriuming"

 
Illfindsomething 2008-05-04 01:28:00 PM  
Tasers kill people
Tasers kill people
Tasers kill people
Tasers kill people
Tasers kill people
Tasers kill people
Tasers kill people
Tasers kill people

I might register the domain right now.

 
MonkeyVegetables [TotalFark] 2008-05-04 01:28:04 PM  
Weaver95: VictoryCabal: Weaver95: Did you expect otherwise?

I wish I could say that I did expect otherwise, but I've learned to expect the worst.

we like to think that we're not ugly, brutal and violent....but the truth is that we're not as 'civilized' as we pretend. Gitmo and CIA run prisons and the war on drugs are uncomfortable reminders of that fact. But as long as we've got hi-def TVs and world of warcraft, society won't care if we taser people on simple traffic stops or bust down the wrong door on a drug raid and kill an innocent person.


vive la revolution

 
Crow The Robot 2008-05-04 01:31:28 PM  
Weaver95: we like to think that we're not ugly, brutal and violent....but the truth is that we're not as 'civilized' as we pretend. Gitmo and CIA run prisons and the war on drugs are uncomfortable reminders of that fact. But as long as we've got hi-def TVs and world of warcraft, society won't care if we taser people on simple traffic stops or bust down the wrong door on a drug raid and kill an innocent person.

But, but...I am safe and can watch Scrubs on my Apple TV using my HDTV while drinking Starbucks coffee and wearing Ugg boots.

 
Oh_Enough_Already 2008-05-04 01:31:35 PM  
The whole "taser debate" at least from the side of those who advocate its use has been entirely impeached and is based on a LIE.

Look: the pro-taser folks argue that it is a "non-lethal" weapon that can be used where an officer might otherwise be forced to use lethal force vis-a-vis his firearm.

This is absolute and utter B.S.

In almost every single instance that we read about (or witness due to the ubiquity of video recording technology in either the hands of Johnny law or private citizens - and mark my words a ban on filming police officers has just GOT to be coming down the pike sooner or later given how much police asshattery has been caught on tape lately) the cops use tasers simply as a violent way to impose their will and or ensure compliance.

NONE of these instances would have warranted the use of a fire arm and, hence, neither should they warrant the use of a taser.

Nonetheless the cops simply use their tasers as one more tool in their arsenal to bully, abuse, assault and otherwise violate the civil rights of the citizenry.

Don't produce your licence fast enough? That's a tasing.

Smart off to the cop? That's a tasing.

Don't stand up fast enough? Tasing.

Etc, etc, etc.

Of all the dozens of videos I've seen of citizens getting tased by cops (cue the inevitable barrage of Youtube links thereof) not a single one of them would have warranted or required the use of a gun.

The cops are simply using tasers because they can and - due to their well documented below average and sub-normal intellectual capabilities - because they need to.

FTP.

 
HulkingMenace 2008-05-04 01:32:34 PM  
Clearly we should go back to clubbing people into compliance with nightsticks and batons. That never killed anyone, and is much more humane.

Idiots.

 
Lamune_Baba 2008-05-04 01:33:33 PM  
More than two dozen medical examiners across the country have found the stun gun at least partly responsible in the deaths of suspects.

Well... yeah.

Sprinting four blocks through people's backyards trying to evade the police while wired on methamphetamine was also at least partly responsible.

And really... the police were partially responsible for being there in the first place. As well as the homeowner. If they didn't have a stick in their butt about some naked man running circles and screaming in their back yard, none of this would have ever happened. The blood is on their hands, too.

 
Welcome to the Machine [TotalFark] 2008-05-04 01:33:53 PM  
What with the low standards police forces now implement for recruits, all that is required is to ask them to comply.....grab the taser.

Excited delirium my ass. Teach your officers how to deal think and hire officers capable of interacting with emotional citizens!

/flame on

 
Selfabortion 2008-05-04 01:36:13 PM  
netweavr: "excited delirium",

Commas go inside quotation marks.


Not in all English-speaking countries. The interweb extends all the way around the entire Northern Hemisphere believe it or not.

 
Shaggy_C 2008-05-04 01:36:18 PM  
Police Officer: License and reg... hey, aren't you the guy who found out he's part black?
Peter Griffin: Yes I am.
Police Officer: [into walkie-talkie] Report of a possible stolen vehicle.
Peter Griffin: But this is my car.
Police Officer: Suspect becoming beligerent.
Peter Griffin: Wha...
Police Officer: Officer down.

 
DuncanMhor 2008-05-04 01:38:02 PM  
HulkingMenace: Clearly we should go back to clubbing people into compliance with nightsticks and batons. That never killed anyone, and is much more humane.

Idiots.


As the post right above yours points out, Tazers are (nominally) substitues for firearms, not clubs.

Idiot

 
perryjo 2008-05-04 01:39:09 PM  
unnaturalcravings: Oh cool a new medical condition. Glaxo Smith Klyne will soon have medication for it, and all of the commercials will be vague enough so everyone thinks they have it.


+ mentions the side affects in a two second window. "Side affects include nausea, diarrhea, stroke, heart attack, and permanent paralysis.

"Do you feel light headed sometimes? Then you (MAY) have excited delirium!

 
planes 2008-05-04 01:39:49 PM  
www.global-air.com

 
GoGoGo [TotalFark] 2008-05-04 01:40:43 PM  
Pluvius: I'm guessing now neither guns nor bullets kill people, just excessive blood loss and trauma caused by bullets.

You gotta love the obtuseness of the judicial system sometimes.

Rob


this.

/like the great chris rock said, they should just charge more for bullets.

 
itazurakko [TotalFark] 2008-05-04 01:40:50 PM  
Pluvius: I'm guessing now neither guns nor bullets kill people, just excessive blood loss and trauma caused by bullets.

You gotta love the obtuseness of the judicial system sometimes.

Rob


Exactly.

"Cause of death was an odd round lesion leading to a rather cone shaped cavity, with tissue mysteriously missing on the reverse side, and lots of blood loss. Reports are that the guy was shot immediately prior to the appearance of these lesions, but surely that was only a coincidence."

/guns don't kill people, holes kill people!

 
TurboCojones [TotalFark] 2008-05-04 01:41:56 PM  
Don't excite my delerium, bro

 
Plug_Nickel 2008-05-04 01:42:00 PM  
HulkingMenace: Clearly we should go back to clubbing people into compliance with nightsticks and batons. That never killed anyone, and is much more humane.

Idiots.


Or, I don 't know, make a hint of an effort to de-escalate. It seems like this is never done anymore. Why bother cast a soothing bolt of lightning with the push of a trigger, right?

 
mOdQuArK! 2008-05-04 01:42:58 PM  
netweavr: Commas go inside quotation marks.

That's only necessary if they're part of the quotation. (If you pull out a rule book, I'm going to make fun of you for pedantically pushing tradition over common sense.)

 
Oh_Enough_Already 2008-05-04 01:43:22 PM  
unnaturalcravings: Oh cool a new medical condition. Glaxo Smith Klyne will soon have medication for it, and all of the commercials will be vague enough so everyone thinks they have it.

Remember the Chris Rock routine about how weed and such is illegal but big pharma can peddle and advertise their drugs (for largely invented "medical conditions" to everybody under the sun . . .

TV announcer voice: "Do you go to sleep at night and get up in the morning?"

"Hey, I have that!"

 
orclover 2008-05-04 01:45:43 PM  
panfried: Well, if you don't RESIST, you don't get tazed, bro!
Stop RESISTING!



Actually in Austin Texas they tase you for not producing your drivers I.D card. APD will also shoot you for holding a knife while retarded. Typically your best bet in Austin if you get pulled over is to just dive out the car window, land face down with your hands behind your head...soil yourself and then scream at the top of your lungs over and over "For the love of god these/this cop is about to kill me, Dear god help me, somebody please tape this for gods sake and tell my children I loved them!!!". Its the only way to be safe.


Ahhh Austin, long before we imported L.A's populace we imported thier cops and police comish. No really.

 
Lamune_Baba 2008-05-04 01:46:24 PM  
Oh_Enough_Already: NONE of these instances would have warranted the use of a fire arm and, hence, neither should they warrant the use of a taser.

Nonetheless the cops simply use their tasers as one more tool in their arsenal to bully, abuse, assault and otherwise violate the civil rights of the citizenry.



While I quite agree with the second comment, the first is dangerously idiotic. Even assuming the weapon was taken out of the hands of the 95% of cops that give the rest a bad name, any time the use of a firearm is warranted you want to use a farking firearm.

You shoot a gun at dangerous people who need to be made dead quickly before you or someone else is. A taser would and should never be used in a life-or-death situation because you've got one shot (sometimes two with the nicer models) at a far shorter range, with far less accuracy, and without much hope of actually stopping a dedicated attacker.

A taser should be used where a firearm is not- in a high threat situation where it does not yet warrant lethal force. The guy waving an axe at officers, or running around the park with a sword.

They're far overused to cause pain and force compliance where they are absolutely not needed, but to hold them to the same level as a firearm is dangerous and stupid.

 
culebra 2008-05-04 01:46:59 PM  
you didnt take your soma this morning did you?

Translation: "It could never happen here"

 
Feral John 2008-05-04 01:47:06 PM  
Light him up!

/nothing is obscure

 
KidneyStone 2008-05-04 01:48:10 PM  
Pluvius: I'm guessing now neither guns nor bullets kill people, just excessive blood loss and trauma caused by bullets.

You forgot lead poisoning.

/and poland

 
clevernamehere 2008-05-04 01:48:12 PM  
Suspect dies at the scene. Medical examiner's report indicates that cause of death was a highly elevated level of the humours, particularly the black and yellow biles.

 
Robokev 2008-05-04 01:49:12 PM  
"Excited Delirium" is a Friday night with 2 hot 22 year-old girls, a bottle of 25 year-old McCallan, and an endless supply of crab legs while watching the entire Mexican air force crash into an oil refinery. I wouldn't mind dying from that.

 
bsuhorndog 2008-05-04 01:50:12 PM  
HulkingMenace: Clearly we should go back to clubbing people into compliance with nightsticks and batons. That never killed anyone, and is much more humane.

Idiots.


I would rather be clubbed than tased.

 
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