FTFA

John Sasser, of Tuscumbia, said, "I thought it was very offense."

They should take out a couple of billboards about the editor's birthplace

I liked the previous headline that read, "Helen Keller billboards attract stares"...with Ironic tag.

/+1 snubbed subby

Why did Helen Keller's dog kill itself?

You'd commit suicide too if your name was ARRRGHARHF.


Why did Helen Keller masturbate with one hand?

She needed the other to moan.


What did Helen Keller's parents do to punish her?

Stick a plunger in the toilet bowl.


/I predict a thread full of hell-bound assholes
//I call first class

I was expecting something shocking and offensive. Instead I got a crack about her being blind.

I wish my life was so awesome that all I had left to do was be outraged at a silly billboard.

This billboard is just about a mile south of my house on I-65. It's been up for about a month. I really don't see what's offensive about this. If you want to see something offensive about Helen Keller, watch The Colbert Report's segment where Stephen sends one of his producers to Tuscumbia, which is in Colbert County, Alabama, to set up "The Stephen Colbert Museum"...they're fricken relentless on Keller.

Link: http://www.comedycentral.com/colbertreport/videos.jhtml?videoId=78779

What you say?

People always have to biatch about something.

When reached for comment Ms. Keller replied, "MNNFMNNFMNFFFMNFF".

Has anyone mentioned that Helen Keller was a Wobblie and was one of the founding members of the ACLU?

She's been dead how long now?

"See, what she couldn't."

I guess I have eyesight issues too, I couldn't see a comma on the billboard.

"I thought it was very offense."

Huh? As opposed to defense?

"I could kind of see it..."

Har, har.

"...it come off as a joke to them."

It sho' do.

"She was extremely intelligent woman, and I don't believe herself would be bothered by that."

Who edited this disaster? A deaf, blind monkey?

HA! HA!

People with disabilities are funy

Uhm... how exactly is that offensive?

How do you confuse Helen Keller?

Give her a basketball and tell her to read it.

/Yeah, I'm Hell bound
//...and I call window.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive?

Because she's a woman.

If Helen Keller were psychic, would that be called a fourth sense?

c.j. HA! HA!

People with disabilities are funy

Like those who can't spell

FTFA: Hyde added, "She was extremely intelligent woman, and I don't believe herself would be bothered by that."

I'm guessing herself wouldn't be bothered by reading any billboard, regardless of what it said.

Too soon?

How'd Hellen Keller burn her hands?
Reading the waffle iron.

How'd Hellen Keller burn her face?
Answering the pressing iron.

/Window seat, smoking.
//Har.

What's the problem with making fun of Helen Keller?

It's not like she can hear it.

/because she's dead

Wow...either the editor is full of fail, or the town's residents speak some new form of pidgin English that I haven't heard yet...

"I thought it was very offense."

"They might not understand the full history of the Shoals area, it come off as a joke to them."

"She was extremely intelligent woman, and I don't believe herself would be bothered by that."

Yikes.

/get the forced sterilization helicopters ready...

After learning about this billboard, Muslims are outraged!
/Of course, before learning about this billboard, Muslims were outraged

scurvydog: I liked the previous headline that read, "Helen Keller billboards attract stares"...with Ironic tag.

/+1 snubbed subby

Now that gave me a decent laugh.

/How did Helen Keller's parents punish her as a child?
//By leaving a plunger in the toilet.

SnakeLee: FTFA

John Sasser, of Tuscumbia, said, "I thought it was very offense."

They should take out a couple of billboards about the editor's birthplace

'...The billboard has a young photo of Helen Keller and reads: "See, what she couldn't."...'

And why is there a comma there?

Anagrammer: After learning about this billboard, Muslims are outraged!
/Of course, before learning about this billboard, Muslims were outraged

I wonder if they're now outraged at Iron Man. I kinda hope they are.

Oh Jesus...no wonder...look at the writer:



/dueling banjos playing in the background

/Jae0o0's girl - She belongs to FARK now

Owangotang: Anagrammer: After learning about this billboard, Muslims are outraged!
/Of course, before learning about this billboard, Muslims were outraged

I wonder if they're now outraged at Iron Man. I kinda hope they are.

The writers seemed to actually make an effort not to stereotype any given group. The Ten Rings (a hint at Mandarin, I'm sure) were composed of several ethnicities, no clear religious identification, and were home to roughly half a dozen languages.

Anagrammer: /Jae0o0's girl - She belongs to FARK now

Haha...farkin' AWESOME...handicapped with a sense of humor! Gotta love it.

Dante Hicks: Have you become so bitter that you now feel the need to attack the handicapped?
Randal Graves: What handicap? They guy's just in a wheelchair, it's not like he's Anne Frank or something.
Dante Hicks: Anne Frank?
Randal Graves: Yeah, the chick that was all duhhh, till the miracle worker showed up and knocked smarts into her.
Dante Hicks: You're talking about Helen Keller.
Randal Graves: No I'm not, I'm talking about Anne Frank. She was deaf, dumb and blind.
Dante Hicks: No she wasn't. Helen Keller was deaf, dumb and blind.
Randal Graves: Are you sure?
Dante Hicks: Yup.
Randal Graves: Then who the f*ck's Anne Frank?

cptrelentless: Why couldn't Helen Keller drive?

Because she's a woman.

Omg. Omg I just snorted so bad at that one. wow.

Anagrammer: /Jae0o0's girl - She belongs to FARK now

That's awesome!

/funny and a knockout.

Marco.....Marco....Marco....Marco....Marco...

How did Helen Keller's mother torment her?

She put doorknobs on all the walls.

Did u hear about the time Helen Keller fell into well? She screamed her hands off.

/one please, aisle seat

I dunno, as far as Alabamans go George Washington Carver made a greater impact on my life than Helen Keller. When it comes down to it, really what did she do? There's a lot better jokes to be made about Alabamans than Helen Keller, just go to any NASCAR thread I don't have Helen Keller's House on my "must see" list-if I can't survive the Mobile Mardi Gras or get Talladega tix I'd rather visit the giant Vulcan statue then go to Stax Records Muscle Shoals Studio Museum;
www.muscleshoalssound.org (new window)

from Google;
"Welcome to Tuscumbia, Alabama -- You Should See Us Now!"

pestluvr:
Dante Hicks: Have you become so bitter that you now feel the need to attack the handicapped?
Randal Graves: What handicap? They guy's just in a wheelchair, it's not like he's Anne Frank or something.
Dante Hicks: Anne Frank?
Randal Graves: Yeah, the chick that was all duhhh, till the miracle worker showed up and knocked smarts into her.
Dante Hicks: You're talking about Helen Keller.
Randal Graves: No I'm not, I'm talking about Anne Frank. She was deaf, dumb and blind.
Dante Hicks: No she wasn't. Helen Keller was deaf, dumb and blind.
Randal Graves: Are you sure?
Dante Hicks: Yup.
Randal Graves: Then who the f*ck's Anne Frank?

I lol'd
/then felt slightly bad
//then laughed again :)

FlyingJ: I dunno, as far as Alabamans go George Washington Carver made a greater impact on my life than Helen Keller. When it comes down to it, really what did she do? There's a lot better jokes to be made about Alabamans than Helen Keller, just go to any NASCAR thread I don't have Helen Keller's House on my "must see" list-if I can't survive the Mobile Mardi Gras or get Talladega tix I'd rather visit the giant Vulcan statue then go to Stax Records Muscle Shoals Studio Museum;
www.muscleshoalssound.org (new window)

from Google;
"Welcome to Tuscumbia, Alabama -- You Should See Us Now!"

I googled Vulcan Statue and I was really kind of disappointed that it wasn't Spock.

The lies told about Helen Keller sicken me. Why is it that documents proving her role in the founding of the American Eugenics Society have been 'lost?'

Q: What was Helen Keller's favourite colour?

A: Courdoroy.

Q: What's the difference between Helen Keller and a pizza?
A: A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

Q: What is the difference between a bar of soap and Helen Keller?
A: A bar of soap doesn't die after 45 seconds in the shower.

The Helen Keller they DON'T teach you about in school (new window)

willicus I'm sorry-he also quit holding a Giant Coke Bottle in the 1950's, but you can still join the Klingon recreators drunk on Romulan Ale @ Riverside IA's TrekFest; Link (new window)

Anagrammer is that the model who was done up like Rose McGowan for the "Grindhouse" booth @ the San Diego Comic Con? She was VERY popular

SubBass49

What's shocking now? That she was a socialist? Anti-Wilson? What?

Water, Helen, Water.
We can't believe she did it. The dumb kid really did it.
Water, Helen, Water.

FlyingJ: Anagrammer is that the model who was done up like Rose McGowan for the "Grindhouse" booth @ the San Diego Comic Con? She was VERY popular

I was thinking something similar. "Nice combination: she's quite cute... and she could cosplay Grindhouse!"

Someone made a joke about Helen Keller having to masturbate with 1 hand so she could use the other to moan.
Got me to thinking that it must really really suck not being sure whether you're alone in a room...especially if you lived in a place like Indonesia where masturbation is illegal.