Wow. I'm surprised. I thought that the newt man was safe. People really must be sick of Labour and the feral state that London (and other cities) are turning into.


Link (man killed for cellphone)

Link (Parents beaten by drunken teenage gang after coming to rescue of son cornered in takeaway)

Link (WPC kicked unconscious by 30-strong gang of teenage drunks after she asked them not to throw popcorn on a tram)

I left England in 2000 to emigrate to the US and am sad at what's happening to my country.

fredcat: I thought that the newt man was safe.

He got better.

/burn her anyway!

A total drunk and playboy. This will be fun to watch.

I look forward to the coming "Bore His Johnson" jokes from our limey friends

You're next, Gordy!

fredcat: Link (man killed for cellphone)

Link (Parents beaten by drunken teenage gang after coming to rescue of son cornered in takeaway)

Link (WPC kicked unconscious by 30-strong gang of teenage drunks after she asked them not to throw popcorn on a tram)

Well, you can feel better about the fact that since all those links are from the Daily Mail, it's almost guaranteed that none of those things actually happened.

Good luck with that guys...

fredcat:
I left England in 2000 to emigrate to the US and am sad at what's happening to my country.

I doubt you'll be missed, Mr Daily Mail reader.

fredcat: I left England in 2000 to emigrate to the US and am sad at what's happening to my country.

which one?

You doesn't has ta call me Johnson...

What about Anne Marie Decicco?

Phil Moskowitz: What about Anne Marie Decicco?

Wrong London. When she was at The Scot's Corner during the World Cup in 2006 she was cheering for Italy, for that she can never be forgiven.

To be fair though, she was probably just media whoring as TSN and Alan Frew were broadcasting from there for the Australia-Italy game.



\\Australia deserved to win that game
\\\Freaking refs awarding a penalty on the last play of the game
\\\\I hope Francesco Totti gets testicular cancer in the ass

Also, if the entire country is willing to be bullied by a bunch of punk kids they deserve what they get.

Where I grew up yobbish behaviour is a sure-fire ass-beating.

There was a bit where Ahnahld was watching Boris speak and said "Wow, he is fumbling all over the place".

When the current Governor of California thinks you have a speaking issue, then you do.

There was a bit of the speech and his reaction on Have I Got New For You last season.

I will try and find it on youtube.

His Da said Boris hasn't had a drink in three months, which, if true, means he must be dead serious, or dead.

This just in--John Thomas appointed Chancellor of the Ex-Check-Her-Out.

Ooomph.

Tiddle.

Followed by the sweetest of Bangs.

Approves

VICTORY!

God I love Boris Johnson

I voted for Boris(1). I voted straight Labour in everything else. If asked why, I would say I was tired of Ken at the beginning sounding like he was tired of being asked, and in the later stages just repeating how bad he thought the Tories would be in government. When he came into power, bus fares were 80p a far, and 8 years late, no better and 2 quid a fare. The tube sucks balls, and all Ken could say was how shallow he though Boris was. Well, sorry. I think Boris will be a bad Mayor, but at least he wants it enough to tell us what he would do. I voted against Ken, not for Boris.
(1: Not voting does nothing. Voting in no confidence at least registers)

I left England in 2000 to emigrate to the US and am sad at what's happening to my country.

I left England in 2000 to re-emigrate to the US and miss it every damn day. Every damn day.

/you think none of the stuff you mention ever happens in the US?

i left england in 2005 and i regret the decision every day :(

Dear Labour: Suck it for your craven cowering before the murdering George Bush. Have fun in the political wasteland for 10 years as punishment for your complicity in thousands of murders.

Tenebreux: I voted for Boris(1). I voted straight Labour in everything else. If asked why, I would say I was tired of Ken at the beginning sounding like he was tired of being asked, and in the later stages just repeating how bad he thought the Tories would be in government. When he came into power, bus fares were 80p a far, and 8 years late, no better and 2 quid a fare. The tube sucks balls, and all Ken could say was how shallow he though Boris was. Well, sorry. I think Boris will be a bad Mayor, but at least he wants it enough to tell us what he would do. I voted against Ken, not for Boris.
(1: Not voting does nothing. Voting in no confidence at least registers)

Wanna translate this to English...'Merican English

I'll give it a shot, generaltimmy. Let's do it...1996 stylee.

Tenebreux: I voted for Dole(1). I voted straight Democrat in everything else. If asked why, I would say I was tired of Clinton at the beginning sounding like he was tired of being asked, and in the later stages just repeating how bad he thought the Republicans would be in government. When he came into power, bus fares were $1.60 a fare, and 8 years later, no better and four bucks a fare. The subway sucks balls, and all Clinton could say was how shallow he thought Dole was. Well, sorry. I think Dole will be a bad president, but at least he wants it enough to tell us what he would do. I voted against Clinton, not for Dole.
(1: Not voting does nothing. Voting for the opponent at least registers)

The Third Man: I'll give it a shot, generaltimmy. Let's do it...1996 stylee.

Tenebreux: I voted for Dole(1). I voted straight Democrat in everything else. If asked why, I would say I was tired of Clinton at the beginning sounding like he was tired of being asked, and in the later stages just repeating how bad he thought the Republicans would be in government. When he came into power, bus fares were $1.60 a fare, and 8 years later, no better and four bucks a fare. The subway sucks balls, and all Clinton could say was how shallow he thought Dole was. Well, sorry. I think Dole will be a bad president, but at least he wants it enough to tell us what he would do. I voted against Clinton, not for Dole.
(1: Not voting does nothing. Voting for the opponent at least registers)

thanks, 1rst, 2nd or 3rd, you are the man indeed!

Tenebreux: When he came into power, bus fares were 80p a far, and 8 years late, no better and 2 quid a fare. The tube sucks balls

Yeah, but you now have a street camera per sq. meter. That oughta count for something?

/Feels like being in a docusoap when in London.

I forget what eight was for: A total drunk and playboy. This will be fun to watch.

Not to mention having been born in New York City.

Johnson?

0Icky0: Not to mention having been born in New York City.

NEW YORK CITY?

/get a rope

Boris the spider?

Creepy, crawly.

Creepy creepy, crawly crawly.

When you get back to London
Tell them Boris sent you.

/To the ex-pats who hope this is for the better

From a related article: The day of the mayoral election, The Guardian ran a piece headed "Don't choose the clown!" in which a raggle-taggle collection of 34 different people - among them Vivienne Westwood, Bianca Jagger and Alan Rickman - queued up to say, in an oddly self-congratulatory way, just why they wouldn't be voting for Boris Johnson.


Dear Alan Rickman:



Yippee-ki-yay, motherfarker

Great granddad was a Turk, so he got the Muzzie vote.
Liked his comments about pickaninnies and watermelon smiles

Tenebreux: When [Ken] into power, bus fares were 80p a fare, and 8 years later, no better and 2 quid a fare. The tube sucks balls, and all Ken could say was how shallow he thought Boris was.

Odd... I paid 90p for the bus yesterday, which turned up on time, was clean and only a few years old.

The tube is bad due to Metronet, for which we blame Gordon Brown, not Red Ken (who was opposed to its privatisation from the start). Anyway, the tube is improving - the Jubilee & Victoria line upgrades with be completed next year, as planned, the the other lines are on schedule for completed upgrades within the next decade. I accept its a long, drawn-out process, but that's what years of no investment does to it...

Tenebreux: When he came into power, bus fares were 80p a far, and 8 years late, no better and 2 quid a fare.


Buses are 90p a fare. Get an oyster card.

I voted for Ken and Sian. Mostly because I don't want a farking Etonian running my city. Jesus, central london went for Ken; the daily mail reading little-england suburbs went for Boris. They shouldn't even have a say in who runs the City. We need to recategorise Barnet, Kingston and so on as home counties.

That and we need a London alternative to the Evening Standard, with its 'Ken aide is a suicide bomber!', 'Boris the Messiah' headlines.

And i voted for sian because... well...



She's better looking than Paddick.

/Hotlinked

Johnson on Top Gear

Doesn't pop

I don't know London, but how much control does the mayor have over day to day stuff? I was under the impression that Ken Livingston was responsible for transport across all of London?

He paid tribute to Mr Livingstone and appeared to offer him a possible role in his new administration.

Is this "Conservative" mayor like a "Republican" mayor of New York City -- in name only?

London would be great if there were no people there. Get everyone out and I might consider giving London the honour of my presence again!

I for one welcome our new complete buffoon of an overlord. Eccentrics FTW!

fredcat: Wow. I'm surprised. I thought that the newt man was safe. People really must be sick of Labour and the feral state that London (and other cities) are turning into.


Link (man killed for cellphone)

Link (Parents beaten by drunken teenage gang after coming to rescue of son cornered in takeaway)

Link (WPC kicked unconscious by 30-strong gang of teenage drunks after she asked them not to throw popcorn on a tram)

I left England in 2000 to emigrate to the US and am sad at what's happening to my country.


Maybe you wouldn't feel so bad if the Daily Mail was your only news source.

Fark It that made me laugh. Thanks.

Am I the only one that read that as Brian Johnson.

Wasn't your only news source that is.

meekychuppet: I for one welcome our new complete buffoon of an overlord. Eccentrics FTW!

This.

The modern, corporate management-style administration of Britain really sucks.

It is about time we returned to the public school, out-of-touch drunken toffs that made this country great.

fredcat: I left England in 2000 to emigrate to the US and am sad at what's happening to my country.

Your country is the US now. We're well shot of whining malcontents like you.

TheHoodedClaw: I doubt you'll be missed, Mr Daily Mail reader.

Personally, I think it's fantastic that Daily Mail readers are emigrating, and fredcat should be commended for helping to make Britain great again.

I don't think most other American farkers realize how funny this is going to be.

Some of us Americans do.

Then again I watch FAR too much British TV.

Some described Boris as the MP for "Have I Got News For You". Almost right.

This is going to be fun to watch.

I need to find a copy of his acceptance speech. What little bits I saw was pretty nasty and funny. Red Ken's "transparent love of London" was a great line.