You're very clever subby, did you read the quote by Police Chief Brody?

He's not about to allow some half-assed autopsy and watch that little Kintner boy spill out all over the dock.

Well, this is not a boat accident, and it wasn't any propeller, it wasn't any coral reef, and it wasn't Jack the Ripper. It was a shark.

I'm a shaaaark.

We're gonna need a bigger paddleboard.

they're going to need a bigger boat

The problem with movies and TV these days is that they don't write scripts in which children are savagely mauled and eaten by animals.

i've had shark jerky and it's good. a little salty but good.

/umm...buffalo jerky is good too

Well? The shark's full. It's like the whole thing where people slow down when they see the cop's lights, who has pulled someone over. That's when you SPEED UP, dammit! He's BUSY!

Saw one eat a rockin'chair once.

Lets get these out of the way.

On a good note, the Solana Beach area has some nice beaches and they might now be empty, creating more of a tranquil situation for me. Or, it will draw more people to see if they can get eaten also.

/Suck my diiiick.
//Why hasn't anyone posted this yet?

rwp:
/Suck my diiiick.
//Why hasn't anyone posted this yet?

Might want to wind up your way-back machine.

I'm slow.

shamelessly hot linked from a GIS.

They don't mention it but the pictures of the guy laying on the beach, he looks longer then he should. Like he was bitten in half.

/whoops

Ya know, I've never actually watched Jaws.

And I still don't intend to go out of my way to.

wildcardjack

Ya know, I've never actually watched Jaws Jews.

And I still don't intend to go out of my way to.


/?

mrapier:

/?

Want my window seat? I think you've earned it.

So I gotta ask... where did the "suck my diiiiick" come from?

Look, white sharks don't actually eat surfers and paddleboarders. They're really hunting for seals. They take a bite of what looks to them like a big black seal, get a hunk of black neoprene, and spit it out, cause who wants a mouthful of black rubber?

It's not the shark's fault the guy inside the wetsuit dies. Stop being such a bunch of pussies and get back in the water.

If they bite you, it's because
they think you're a fat little seal.

Or a rich suit.

RoxtarRyan
mrapier:

/?

Want my window seat? I think you've earned it.

I was going to cop out and say I was drunk but then I realized that'd do more harm than good. But I appreciate your nod this a way on the "going to hell" bus.

If ever a pic needed the caption "Om nom nom nom!"

Smoegasbord + surfers = Surfursbord?

Mmm mmm. crunchy neoprene!

Approves

the sharks will be most pleased. humans are delicious.

Reminds me of that surfer girl who lost an arm to a shark and continued to surf after the wound healed.

Gyrfalcon: cause who wants a mouthful of black rubber?



/although she prefers Seal.

mrapier: RoxtarRyan
mrapier:

/?

Want my window seat? I think you've earned it.

I was going to cop out and say I was drunk but then I realized that'd do more harm than good. But I appreciate your nod this a way on the "going to hell" bus.

You're Mel Gibson, aren't you?

/knew there were some famous farkers lurking around here!

This was no paddleboat accident.

"...fair Spanish ladies..."

Who put all those sharks in our ocean?

kntgsp: I still don't understand why people don't wear bright orange wetsuits. Or something that looks completely different from a seal.

I've always wondered this. Does the suit being black serve any purpose other than getting your ass chomped?

People would rather be eaten by a shark than advertise to every other surfer in the water "I'M A BIG ORANGE MAMMA'S BOY"

They'll stick to sea lion black and take their chances.

"As you know, Amity Solana means friendship."

/The polyester suit with the anchors just *kills* me

Japanese submarine slammed two torpedoes into our side, Chief. It was comin' back, from the island of Tinian to Leyte, just delivered the bomb. The Hiroshima bomb.

Eleven hundred men went into the water. Vessel went down in twelve minutes. Didn't see the first shark for about a half an hour. Tiger. Thirteen footer. You know, you know that when you're in the water, chief? You tell by lookin' from the dorsal to the tail. Well, we didn't know. `Cause our bomb mission had been so secret, no distress signal had been sent. Huh. They didn't even list us overdue for a week.

Very first light, Chief, the sharks come cruisin'. So we formed ourselves into tight groups. You know it's... kinda like `ol squares in battle like a, you see on a calendar, like the battle of Waterloo. And the idea was, the shark would go for nearest man and then he'd start poundin' and hollerin' and screamin' and sometimes the shark would go away. Sometimes he wouldn't go away. Sometimes that shark, he looks right into you. Right into your eyes. You know the thing about a shark, he's got...lifeless eyes, black eyes, like a doll's eye. When he comes at ya, doesn't seem to be livin'. Until he bites ya and those black eyes roll over white. And then, ah then you hear that terrible high pitch screamin' and the ocean turns red and spite of all the poundin' and the hollerin' they all come in and rip you to pieces.

Y'know by the end of that first dawn, lost a hundred men! I don't know how many sharks, maybe a thousand! I don't know how many men, they averaged six an hour. On Thursday mornin' chief, I bumped into a friend of mine, Herbie Robinson from Cleveland. Baseball player, boatswain's mate. I thought he was asleep, reached over to wake him up. Bobbed up and down in the water, just like a kinda top. Up ended. Well... he'd been bitten in half below the waist.

Noon the fifth day, Mr. Hooper, a Lockheed Ventura saw us, he swung in low and he saw us. He'd a young pilot, a lot younger than Mr. Hooper, anyway he saw us and come in low. And three hours later a big fat PBY comes down and start to pick us up. You know that was the time I was most frightened? Waitin' for my turn. I'll never put on a lifejacket again.

So, eleven hundred men went in the water, three hundred and sixteen men come out, the sharks ttook the rest, June the 29, 1945.

Anyway, we delivered the bomb.

HEADLINE OF THE YEAR SO FAR.

/grats subby!

Very sad. But humans kill far more sharks, as its always pointed out.

That's some bad hat, Harry.

I wonder if he was swimming with a bow-legged woman?

I understand they caught a large... predator.

Barracuda!!!

Huh? What?

Me and my shark, E-days 2008
\~.20 BAC in that picture

wildcardjack: Ya know, I've never actually watched Jaws.

And I still don't intend to go out of my way to.

I wouldn't go out of your way, you've probably heard so much you could tell other people what happens.

Just a suggestion, if you do come across the dvd view it as a piece of film-making, not a movie. It's Spielberg at/near his best.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Candygram.

I read the headline and choked on my macaroni.

+1 lite, subby!

"I'll find him for three, but I'll catch him, and kill him, for ten. But you've gotta make up your minds. If you want to stay alive, then ante up...Ten thousand dollars for me by myself. For that you get the head, the tail, the whole damn thing."

I think I am familiar with the fact that you are going to ignore this particular problem until it bites you in the ass.


wildcardjack: Ya know, I've never actually watched Jaws.
And I still don't intend to go out of my way to.

I bet you don't own a tv either. It really is a masterpiece.