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(London Times) Asinine Nanny State cracks down on yet another dangerous enemy of the people: bagpipers   (entertainment.timesonline.co.uk) divider line 97
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FarkinNortherner [recently expired TotalFark] 2008-04-20 06:55:02 AM  
Good. Throw the screeching windbags in Loch Lomond. And the bagpipes, too.

 
Jenthelibrarian [TotalFark] 2008-04-20 07:04:05 AM  
Northerner
When did you return?
*Hug*

Definition of a gentleman?
Someone who can play the bagpipes but doesn't.

 
malcy 2008-04-20 07:24:41 AM  
Headline so full of troll.

'Typically, a pipe band played at full volume peaks at 122 decibels outdoors, noisier than the sound of either a nightclub or a chainsaw, which rises to 116 decibels.'

Quite right to make the bastids STFU a bit.

 
eddyatwork [TotalFark] 2008-04-20 07:37:16 AM  
Carnegie Mellon University surrenders!

/only bagpiping major offering school in the country

 
Aardvark Inc. 2008-04-20 07:44:09 AM  
Meh. The English tried something similar a few hundred years ago and that didn't work either.

 
roadkillontheweb 2008-04-20 07:50:37 AM  
Thank God
What the hell took them so long?

 
YixilTesiphon 2008-04-20 07:51:20 AM  
eqtworld: malcy: 'Typically, a pipe band played at full volume peaks at 122 decibels outdoors, noisier than the sound of either a nightclub or a chainsaw, which rises to 116 decibels.'

Jebus.

I am all for making fun of the BS nanny laws in the UK, but I don't think there is any western country where you can get away with making that kind of racket.


This is a workplace regulation, meaning that the bagpipers themselves are required to wear earplugs. Try tuning your instrument when wearing earplugs.

 
Dubya's_Coke_Dealer 2008-04-20 07:51:43 AM  
Sometimes you NEED a nanny state.

 
log_jammin [TotalFark] 2008-04-20 07:56:08 AM  
geeez people....The average Brit doesn't need and DOESN'T WANT bagpipes! They don't have a bagpipe culture like the US does.

Sure, if someones job requires bagpipes they can get licensed and have bagpipes at a local bagpipe range. Or replica bagpipes if they are putting on a play or a reenactment of some sort(and the replica bagpipes are locked in a secure container when not in use).

If you have such a small penis that you need bagpipes, go for it. But normal people are happy with not getting piped by bagpipe nuts while walking down the street.

 
baltimoreblonde 2008-04-20 07:56:56 AM  
OK, now they're going too blasted far!

 
Smellvin 2008-04-20 07:59:14 AM  
log_jammin: geeez people....The average Brit doesn't need and DOESN'T WANT bagpipes! They don't have a bagpipe culture like the US does.

Sure, if someones job requires bagpipes they can get licensed and have bagpipes at a local bagpipe range. Or replica bagpipes if they are putting on a play or a reenactment of some sort(and the replica bagpipes are locked in a secure container when not in use).

If you have such a small penis that you need bagpipes, go for it. But normal people are happy with not getting piped by bagpipe nuts while walking down the street.


Pipe grabber.

 
log_jammin [TotalFark] 2008-04-20 08:01:42 AM  
Smellvin: Pipe grabber.

from my cold dead hands...

 
Eddie_Dean_NY [TotalFark] 2008-04-20 08:02:03 AM  
img241.imageshack.us

"They may take our lives, but they will never take our
FREEDOM WAILING BAGS OF DYING CATS!"

 
DjangoStonereaver [TotalFark] 2008-04-20 08:03:42 AM  
There is nothing more beautiful than bagpipes played well.

And there is nothing more painful than bagpipes played poorly.

 
Maturin 2008-04-20 08:04:09 AM  
I predict that Scotland will declare the Crumhorn to be an obscene nuisance threaten to cudgel anyone found with one in their possesion.

 
YixilTesiphon 2008-04-20 08:05:01 AM  
eqtworld: YixilTesiphon: This is a workplace regulation, meaning that the bagpipers themselves are required to wear earplugs. Try tuning your instrument when wearing earplugs.

Oh, I see. Most countries have something like that though, here it is OSHA, if you go on a construction site you have to wear a hard hat and if there is certain machinery, earplugs.

/can anyone really tell if a bagpipe is out of tune ;)


Those regulations are also stupid.

 
FarkinNortherner [recently expired TotalFark] 2008-04-20 08:07:34 AM  
YixilTesiphon: This is a workplace regulation, meaning that the bagpipers themselves are required to wear earplugs. Try tuning your instrument when wearing earplugs.

a) Cumulative exposure limits mean you don't have to wear them constantly
b) I've never heard any evidence that a set of bagpipes can be tuned
c) Everybody will ignore this, other than at major events

But mostly (b)

 
MarshWoman [TotalFark] 2008-04-20 08:13:58 AM  
eqtworld: /can anyone really tell if a bagpipe is out of tune ;)

Why yes, many of us can. And when the pipes are played well, they are a joy to hear.
www.northernphoenix.com

 
Shadow Blasko 2008-04-20 08:14:16 AM  
Not cool... Not cool at all.

Being a piper is one of the greatest things in the world.

Women just cant resist a man who can blow, squeeze, and finger while keeping a good rhythm!

 
MarshWoman [TotalFark] 2008-04-20 08:16:30 AM  
FarkinNortherner: b) I've never heard any evidence that a set of bagpipes can be tuned

Then you must be tone deaf. All three drones and the chanter are tuned before playing.

 
Sgian Dubh 2008-04-20 08:17:07 AM  
log_jammin: If you have such a small penis that you need bagpipes, go for it.

Wow, that's a new one. I'll add it to the list along with SUV's, fast cars, guns, and speed boats.

 
Day_Old_Dutchie 2008-04-20 08:18:00 AM  
To many non-Scots, "The Pipes" sound like this...
img132.imageshack.us

(But nowhere as bad as some middle-Eastern and Asian music to "Western" ears.)

And to some rap and hip-hop to person's over 50!

Mind you, I went through this "generational" crap with my parents too, but I did eventually get a gruff concession from them that, yes, rock-n-roll does have some redeeming qualities.

But rap & hiphop? With all the glorification of violence, destructive narcotics, bling, pimps and "ho's"? Sorry, no.

 
Jenthelibrarian [TotalFark] 2008-04-20 08:19:16 AM  
Pipe dream - glorious history of Scotland's iconic instrument is made up, says expert


Link (new window)

 
Smellvin 2008-04-20 08:19:43 AM  
I almost forgot this in a bagpipe thread!

/Not a rickroll

 
Paused Broken Stop 2008-04-20 08:25:27 AM  
RFTA, it's the result of a European (or more precisely EU) directive, although I suppose it's possible the HSE could have taken a less strict approach to implementing it.

 
No Catchy Nickname 2008-04-20 08:28:20 AM  
I'm English, but I like the sound of bagpipes.
I reckon one of my ancestors must have been raped by a marauding Scot.

Marauding Scots? In MY country? It's more likely than you think.

 
Epiphany 2008-04-20 08:29:22 AM  
BOYCOTT THE NANNY STATE CLICHE


>NANNY STATE IS A STUPID farkING CLICHE

 
log_jammin [TotalFark] 2008-04-20 08:30:58 AM  
Epiphany: BOYCOTT THE NANNY STATE CLICHE

because it hurts peoples feelings and hurting peoples feelings is BAD!

 
planes 2008-04-20 08:31:46 AM  
www.global-air.com

 
The_Original_Roxtar 2008-04-20 08:33:57 AM  
log_jammin: Epiphany: BOYCOTT THE NANNY STATE CLICHE

because it hurts peoples feelings and hurting peoples feelings is BAD!


there should be some sort of law passed so that nobody gets their feelings hurt by those naughty words ever again.


/if ye don't like the pipes, then feck off!

 
yotta 2008-04-20 08:34:43 AM  
Some types of deafness are contagious.

 
wsommerv 2008-04-20 08:35:21 AM  
Paused Broken Stop: RFTA, it's the result of a European (or more precisely EU) directive, although I suppose it's possible the HSE could have taken a less strict approach to implementing it.

Exactly. It's not the Nanny State, it's the Nanny continent. But I guess Subby is going for the low reading comprehension demographic.

 
No Such Agency 2008-04-20 08:36:05 AM  
FarkinNortherner: Good. Throw the screeching windbags in Loch Lomond. And the bagpipes, too.

Mmm, Loch Lomond...

content.answers.com

 
meekychuppet 2008-04-20 08:38:09 AM  
TFA: Nanny State cracks down on yet another dangerous enemy of the people: bagpipers

I spent last night cracking down on yo momma.

 
log_jammin [TotalFark] 2008-04-20 08:39:30 AM  
The_Original_Roxtar: there should be some sort of law passed so that nobody gets their feelings hurt by those naughty words ever again.

Exactly!

The average Brit doesn't need and DOESN'T WANT the nanny state cliche! They don't have a nanny state cliche culture like the US does.....

 
politech 2008-04-20 08:49:54 AM  
FTFA: "Audiences will see musicians in orchestras wearing earplugs in the future," said Mark Pemberton, director of the Association of British Orchestras.

From the sound of British Orchestra music I always assuemed they already did wear earplugs.

/Loves me the Pipes

 
richw 2008-04-20 08:50:16 AM  
Ban the bloody pipes before we all turn into Scotsmen!!!!

Short Version (new window)

Long Version (new window)

 
FarkinNortherner [recently expired TotalFark] 2008-04-20 08:52:27 AM  
log_jammin: because it hurts peoples feelings and hurting peoples feelings is BAD!

No it doesn't, it just brings people who either revel in their pig-ignorant insularity, like yourself, or are merely trolling, to threads where grown-ups are talking.

 
Epiphany 2008-04-20 08:55:24 AM  
log_jammin
No because its not funny, has never been funny, and therefore on the internets its pretty much farking useless as a cliche

 
tarquinrainbowtrout 2008-04-20 08:55:39 AM  
i feel the need to post this - welcome to britain (p)

 
edenza 2008-04-20 08:55:42 AM  
i134.photobucket.com
Dunna approve

/We've got a piper down!

 
log_jammin [TotalFark] 2008-04-20 09:00:19 AM  
FarkinNortherner: No it doesn't, it just brings people who either revel in their pig-ignorant insularity, like yourself

man the fark up nancy.
really...are you that farking sensitive? are you going to cry now?

threads where grown-ups are talking.

well please don't let me stop you from discussing your high minded and adult topic of "Bagpipe tuning: Believe it...or not!"

 
log_jammin [TotalFark] 2008-04-20 09:02:19 AM  
Epiphany: No because its not funny, has never been funny, and therefore on the internets its pretty much farking useless as a cliche

when people like FarkinNortherner: get their panties that twisted over it...yeah...its funny.

 
Two Dogs Farking [TotalFark] 2008-04-20 09:04:55 AM  
The only thing that gets UK Farkers' knickers in a twist more than "Nanny State" headlines are "Nanny State" headlines from the Daily Fail. That's what makes them so much fun :-)

 
betona 2008-04-20 09:15:22 AM  
Oh and, not amused.

 
No Catchy Nickname 2008-04-20 09:17:03 AM  
richw: Ban the bloody pipes before we all turn into Scotsmen!!!!
Short Version (new window)
Long Version (new window)


Holy crap!! The long version you linked to opens in New Pudsey station, which is in my hometown (between Leeds and Bradford)! That's another Monty Python-Bradford connection (part of the dance in "Every Sperm is Sacred") was shot in Lister Park, Bradford.

 
log_jammin [TotalFark] 2008-04-20 09:17:50 AM  
Epiphany:

and you live like an hour from me so you're supposed to back me up!

 
FarkinNortherner [recently expired TotalFark] 2008-04-20 09:18:57 AM  
log_jammin: really...are you that farking sensitive? are you going to cry now?

What a shame, your, at best, tenuous grasp on reality has now slipped utterly :(

 
log_jammin [TotalFark] 2008-04-20 09:21:51 AM  
FarkinNortherner: What a shame, your, at best, tenuous grasp on reality has now slipped utterly :(

the bagpipes drove me over the edge

 
richw 2008-04-20 09:30:06 AM  
No Catchy Nickname: richw: Ban the bloody pipes before we all turn into Scotsmen!!!!
Short Version (new window)
Long Version (new window)

Holy crap!! The long version you linked to opens in New Pudsey station, which is in my hometown (between Leeds and Bradford)! That's another Monty Python-Bradford connection (part of the dance in "Every Sperm is Sacred") was shot in Lister Park, Bradford.


Wow...learn something every day on Fark!

 
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