Screw you submitter!

(birthday just passed)

The older I get, the stupider other people get. Now go die in a farking fire, subby.

"research?" Where'd they do this research? The Alzheimer's wing of their local nursing home?

I worked in a retirement home for 3 years. They were pretty damn grumpy. Treated us dietary workers like crap. They felt they'd "earned the right" by somehow managing to avoid Darwinning themselves.

In general, the odds of being happy increased 5 percent with every 10 years of age.

You'll be 100% happy if you make it to 200.

Do I smell a remake of "Grumpy Old Men"? Perhaps "Happy but Creepy Old Men"?

On behalf of my father in law I would like to disagree. he is a cross between Abe Simpson and Jack Klampas..... without the warmth or engaging stories.

(ugh, why do old people have to tell you the SAME stories over and over????)

grumpiness is directly co-related with how much consensual sex you engage in

I think the author of this article is smoking crack.

All of my grandparents were moderately unhappy once they got past 60. That was the magical point in their lives when all of their friends started dropping dead around them. It also didn't help that my grandmothers consistently outlived their husbands (grandma #1 outlived two of 'em, grandma #2 outlived three of 'em).

And all of those commercials you see on TV with old folks taking cruises and driving restored classic cars, living the high life because they invested before retirement? Yeah, most people don't have the disposable income to do that kind of stuff. So retirement is moderately boring.

But, you do get to dance the Charleston with the old widowers down at the Elk lodge, buy discounted liquor and complain that the new girls at the lodge just aren't as serious as you are about keeping tradition.

Bullshiat

I think what you're missing is that as single
people age, they get happier.

/happy happy joy joy
/why is everybody else so stupid though? I really didn't feel this way when I was younger.

Older people seem to be happier than young people, to me at least. Although maybe that's just a facade they put up to confuse us youngsters into living a long life.

Come to think of it, these are the same folks trying to trick everyone into getting married...

no comment

No, I don't think so.

I am sustained on sheer pissiness as it is. Don't make me angry, Smitty.

So what you're saying is that happy, well-adjusted people ruined the U.S./global economy (twice), started/prolonged every unnecessary war, and elected George W. Bush (again... twice)?

/The hell you say!

What makes people think happy and grumpy don't go together?

I'm extremely happy as a grumpy old curmudgeon.

So STFU you punks, and go get me my FRIES!

That 'get off my lawn' saying is the funniest thing ever. I even laugh about it when im not farking and I happen to think about it. Good stuff.

I dont think I would be as happy when im older as I am now. Things stop working as well, you have to have other people do things for you, your body starts to sag, etc. I like being perky and fit.

My parents' and in-laws' ages range from 62 to 86. Those four people are some of the happiest folks you'd ever meet. I'm sure no more work and some well-mannered children and grandchildren have a lot to do with it, too.

If you're good to your kids and they return the favor, you'll probably remain happy as you age. If you're a prick and your children disown you as soon as they can leave the house, you'll regret it and hate everyone around you when you get old.

Andrew Wiggin: The older I get, the stupider other people get. Now go die in a farking fire, subby.

THIS

I'm noticing that, too. I hate people the older I get. I don't want to be that way, I just am, and that makes me grumpy. I'm going to be 41 in June, and speaking for all people over 40, it sucks. Why should I be happy when half my life is over, my looks are fading, I have aches and pains that I never used to have, and my parents are getting sick and old. Ya, getting old is great!

"Kids getting lazier" trifecta in play

There comes a time when you rip out the grass and replace it with beauty bark and bushes. That marks the dividing line between the grumpy "get off my lawn" years and the blissful "Welp, nothing left to see here, let's toodle on down to the farmer's market" years.

EsteeFlwrPot: That 'get off my lawn' saying is the funniest thing ever. I even laugh about it when im not farking and I happen to think about it. Good stuff.

I dont think I would be as happy when im older as I am now. Things stop working as well, you have to have other people do things for you, your body starts to sag, etc. I like being perky and fit.

Enjoy it why you can Esteegirl, I've been cleaning up, mowing, cleaning up dog crap, cutting wood, having the wife yell at me, burning branches on my lawn and my back is killing me.
/all so I can tell someone to get of my lawn

Saborlas: I worked in a retirement home for 3 years. They were pretty damn grumpy. Treated us dietary workers like crap. They felt they'd "earned the right" by somehow managing to avoid Darwinning themselves.

Well yeah...I'd be treating people like crap too if I was stuck in a home with somebody telling me what to eat all the time. Old people are probably happier thinking "Thank god, this shiat is almost over."

AlwaysRightBoy:
Enjoy it why you can Esteegirl, I've been cleaning up, mowing, cleaning up dog crap, cutting wood, having the wife yell at me, burning branches on my lawn and my back is killing me.
/all so I can tell someone to get of my lawn

Wait... isn't that what your wife is for?

the voices in your head: AlwaysRightBoy:
Enjoy it why you can Esteegirl, I've been cleaning up, mowing, cleaning up dog crap, cutting wood, having the wife yell at me, burning branches on my lawn and my back is killing me.
/all so I can tell someone to get of my lawn

Wait... isn't that what your wife is for?

actually she's still out there, I'm taking a break to fark.

the voices in your head: Wait... isn't that what your wife is for?

Hey!!! Its nice to have a man that helps his wife around the house! Things get done faster, the woman is less tired and theres more time to have teh sexy time.

EsteeFlwrPot:

That 'get off my lawn' saying is the funniest thing ever. I even laugh about it when im not farking and I happen to think about it. Good stuff.

So say you now... It changes sooner than you think.

I used to be the cool, hep guy with the hippy girlfriend that all the young folk used to look up when they wanted a safe place to hang out, drink beer and crash.

Then one night I heard some punks making revel in the street in front of my house...

I went out in my sweats, sort of squatted down on the retaining wall over them watching, it took a minute before they noticed I was there.

"Hi. Would you mind quieting down a bit?"

And in that moment, I became the GOML guy.

Your turn is coming.

Maybe because all of the unhappy people have drugged/drank/smoked/eaten themselves to death?

/gnawing on my arm

EsteeFlwrPot: I like being perky and fit.

The thought of you being perky and fit makes me very happy.

AlwaysRightBoy:

actually she's still out there, I'm taking a break to fark.

Well done.

maxheck:
I used to be the cool, hep guy with the hippy girlfriend that all the young folk used to look up when they wanted a safe place to hang out, drink beer and crash.

Ummm... does your girlfriend know about this?

EsteeFlwrPot: the voices in your head: Wait... isn't that what your wife is for?

Hey!!! Its nice to have a man that helps his wife around the house! Things get done faster, the woman is less tired and theres more time to have teh sexy time.

I played stay-at-home dad for three years. I was amazed at how often I got lucky just from getting laundry done and having dinner ready when she walked in. Considering her salary was more than double mine, I wasn't a hard decision to leave work for three years.

I think that time in our lives went a long way toward making sure we'll be happy old people. And nothing wrong with being pissed at disrespectful youth. Even when I was a teen, I had little patience for inconsiderate motherfarkers.

maxheck: So say you now... It changes sooner than you think.

I used to be the cool, hep guy with the hippy girlfriend that all the young folk used to look up when they wanted a safe place to hang out, drink beer and crash.

Then one night I heard some punks making revel in the street in front of my house...

I went out in my sweats, sort of squatted down on the retaining wall over them watching, it took a minute before they noticed I was there.

"Hi. Would you mind quieting down a bit?"

And in that moment, I became the GOML guy.

Your turn is coming.

But you said it nicely. Doesnt the GOML guy yell it out his window in that really old guy voice with a shotgun in his hand?

Or is that just the way I imagine it?

Chester J. Lampwick: And nothing wrong with being pissed at disrespectful youth. Even when I was a teen, I had little patience for inconsiderate motherfarkers.

Yeah im 22 and i've always gotten pissed off at the nasty loud kids, even when I was younger. They have no respect for anyone else or themselves. I was always the quiet type. I do get loud with my own friends but usually we arent bothering anyone else, as far as I know. We were never rowdy when other people were nearby or anything like that.

EsteeFlwrPot:

But you said it nicely. Doesnt the GOML guy yell it out his window in that really old guy voice with a shotgun in his hand?

Or is that just the way I imagine it?

I think it really starts when you buy you're first house.
/afraid of the grammar nazi

EsteeFlwrPot:

But you said it nicely. Doesnt the GOML guy yell it out his window in that really old guy voice with a shotgun in his hand?

Or is that just the way I imagine it?

Well, I think it depends on the effect.

I do know that a bunch of young-uns confronted by a powerfully built, bearded half-naked gargoyle-looking dude crouched on the wall above them were very, very respectful.

GOML has many techniques. Not just shotguns!

I'm young so I'm getting a kick out of some of these replies until I realize that you'll be taking my social security money.

EsteeFlwrPot: Yeah im 22 and i've always gotten pissed off at the nasty loud kids, even when I was younger. They have no respect for anyone else or themselves. I was always the quiet type. I do get loud with my own friends but usually we arent bothering anyone else, as far as I know. We were never rowdy when other people were nearby or anything like that.

The loud part doesn't bother me as much as the nasty. Kids cussing like it's all they know around everyone, particularly when my children are around, piss me off. I swear all the time, usually just to get a laugh out of my wife when I think something is really stupid, but never in public where anyone else can hear it, and definitely not around my kids.

One thing that's always helped me with the neighborhood delinquents is getting to know them. You'd be surprised how polite the worst kids can be if you're on a first name basis with them and engage in some casual conversation once in awhile. I don't care if they're laughing at me behind my back; at least they're not messing with my stuff.

Aar1012: I'm young so I'm getting a kick out of some of these replies until I realize that you'll be taking my social security money.

HAHA

/This.
//ya bastids!

the voices in your head:

Ummm... does your girlfriend know about this?

Given said *ex* girlfriend's behaviours, I' worry a bit more about her hep-ness.

Hence the "ex" bit. (sigh)

If you were all full of Vicodin to ease your lumbago, you'd be happy too.


/Prescription Drug Benefit ftw!

EsteeFlwrPot: Aar1012: I'm young so I'm getting a kick out of some of these replies until I realize that you'll be taking my social security money.

HAHA

/This.
//ya bastids!

Quiet, or will put you in a home

Off?

Aar1012: Quiet, or will put you in a home

but im 22 yrs old.

Chester J. Lampwick:

The loud part doesn't bother me as much as the nasty. Kids cussing like it's all they know around everyone, particularly when my children are around, piss me off. I swear all the time, usually just to get a laugh out of my wife when I think something is really stupid, but never in public where anyone else can hear it, and definitely not around my kids.

One of the advantages of being old and monstrous: Once buying fuel I ran into a couple of kids talking to the other kid behind the counter, and one in particular was just being foul...


I worked construction for years, and I've several friends who served in the Navy, so I'm no stranger to the wonders of cursing, but this was just gratuitous. And there was a middle-aged lady who could have been any of these punk's mother buying gas hearing this foul crap.

I lit into foul-mouthed boy. I told him that there was no place for that sort of language, and that with a little education he might be able to express himself better.

Of course, it helped that I'm bigger than the average bear, but what really provided gratification was that his own friends were nodding approval.