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(Daily Mail) Interesting Bermuda residents haver their shorts in a knot over government proposal to scrap Queen of England's birthday as a national holiday (w/ pic of Queen vowing vengeance)   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 58
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FredaDeStilleto [TotalFark] 2008-04-17 08:27:29 PM  
As often as I have tried, I could never haver my shorts into a knot.
I guess I need a bigger haver.

 
zorgon 2008-04-17 08:46:08 PM  
Ah, April. The month in which everyone in Bermuda who owns a boat suddenly remembers it exists and works frantically to get it in the water by May Two Four.

/former expat

 
AlabamaGirl [TotalFark] 2008-04-17 08:51:37 PM  
watch out for that triangle

 
mcwebe0 [TotalFark] 2008-04-17 09:51:34 PM  
I'm pretty sure that headline is asking for a sack joke, but I'm just not sure what it would be.

 
Somacandra [TotalFark] 2008-04-17 10:21:28 PM  
img1.picturewizard.com

I wouldn't mess with her.

 
blitzy 2008-04-18 02:42:33 AM  
i would walk 500 miles for a piece of hot royal english ass

 
dArthvAter 2008-04-18 02:42:34 AM  
Would it be petty to make fun of "haver"? No? Cool!

 
lordargent 2008-04-18 02:43:01 AM  
FredaDeStilleto : As often as I have tried, I could never haver my shorts into a knot.

You need bermuda shorts.

 
hyperspacemonkey 2008-04-18 02:44:00 AM  
Why would anyone scrap a holiday? Jeez. I would retaliate by never letting the Prime Minister sleep. I can't rest, he can't rest. Cymbals and air horns all night, baby. This means war.

 
HappyHarryHardOn [TotalFark] 2008-04-18 02:44:27 AM  
static.nme.com

Send these guys in to sing a special song for her

 
named 2008-04-18 02:47:19 AM  
There is a Bermuda shorts joke in there too I think.

 
shawn82 2008-04-18 02:47:30 AM  
I hope that lady gets raped to death by rabid baboons.

 
goblues 2008-04-18 02:47:53 AM  
Motherfark all royalty! What the fark makes them so farking special?


/inbred worse than Georgia

 
Churchill2004 [TotalFark] 2008-04-18 02:48:12 AM  
Bermuda is farking awesome. Government's a bit heavy handed, though.

 
goblues 2008-04-18 02:48:39 AM  
goblues: Motherfark all royalty! What the fark makes them so farking special?


/inbred worse than Georgia


not me...them.

 
AtikuX 2008-04-18 02:49:52 AM  
hyperspacemonkeyWhy would anyone scrap a holiday? Jeez. I would retaliate by never letting the Prime Minister sleep. I can't rest, he can't rest. Cymbals and air horns all night, baby. This means war.

They're not, just renaming it:
The June bank holiday is to be replaced next year by a National Heroes' Day in October.
[...]
Observers point out that October 13 coincides with the prestigious Grand Slam of Golf, which features the winners of the game's four major tournaments and has been awarded to Bermuda for two years.

October 13 is also a Monday.

Maybe the protesters just don't like Golf?

 
rackrent [TotalFark] 2008-04-18 02:53:21 AM  
blitzy: i would walk 500 miles for a piece of hot royal english ass

I see what you did there.

members.cox.net

 
blitzy 2008-04-18 02:57:07 AM  
rackrent: blitzy: i would walk 500 miles for a piece of hot royal english ass

I see what you did there.


i was about to lose faith... thank you

/nothing obscure

 
awalkingecho 2008-04-18 03:04:01 AM  
Whatever the fark that means, man.

 
hyperspacemonkey 2008-04-18 03:04:53 AM  
AtikuX: They're not, just renaming it...Maybe the protesters just don't like Golf?

Oh. Phooey.

 
supertoad 2008-04-18 03:09:54 AM  
i'd be pissed too. what moran decided there was a need for less holidays in the year.

 
Korzine 2008-04-18 03:48:45 AM  
Wow, a whole 3% signed an online petition. With 1/2 of that being such well known members of society, such as Pat McKracken and Ben Dover, I'm sure.

 
Bit'O'Gristle [TotalFark] 2008-04-18 03:53:39 AM  
I'm sure that the queen of England doesn't give a fark about the people's birthday's there, so why should they care about hers?

 
Type40 2008-04-18 04:31:14 AM  
Bermuda is the best, most beautiful place on Earth, and I'm not just saying that because I was born there.

 
whidbey [TotalFark] 2008-04-18 04:32:08 AM  
God save the Queen...

She made you a moran.

 
Commander Lysdexic 2008-04-18 04:39:49 AM  
Rule Brittania, Brittania rules the waves....

 
BomboChipolata 2008-04-18 05:12:56 AM  
Firstly: Fark the Daily Mail. A bunch of toadying, suck-up royal-lovers to a man. They are so far up the collective royal Gary, they have no idea the British empire collapsed ages ago under the weight of its own jingoistic bullshiat.

Secondly: Fark the royal family - every single one of the scrounging, feckless, inbred scum. Swanning around like they own the place because the meek-minded UK public have taken in the derriere from them for hundreds of years and are too pathetic to do what the French did and get rid of them (OK, Scots excepted). Every time I see a picture of one of the irritating shiats grinning into the cameras while on holiday in one of their houses in some country or other, I want to vomit.

Wake up, Britain. You're being screwed *and* paying for the privilege. At least have them all sterilized so they can't breed any more bottom-feeding filth to plague the country.

/Brit - English, in fact.
//No, I don't really care what you might think - but thanks for asking.

 
Anagrammer 2008-04-18 05:23:00 AM  
Wow! They get Elton John's birthday off?!?


/Sorry
//When I hear "Queen" and "England", my first thought . . .

 
TaGirl_Keri 2008-04-18 05:52:01 AM  
BomboChipolata: Stop beating about the bush man, tell us how you really feel.

 
give me doughnuts [TotalFark] 2008-04-18 06:05:25 AM  
Everyone seems to have missed the most important part: the side-bar story that includes swimsuit shots of Angelina Jolie when she was 16.

 
Jamieboy 2008-04-18 06:10:19 AM  
BomboChipolata: Firstly: Fark the Daily Mail. A bunch of toadying, suck-up royal-lovers to a man. They are so far up the collective royal Gary, they have no idea the British empire collapsed ages ago under the weight of its own jingoistic bullshiat.


I guess you never saw a copy of "Majesty Magazine". Talk about toadying suck up royal lovers. I have a couple of old copies about and a friend of mine thought they were MAD Magazine spoofs.

 
PseUdononymous Savagery 2008-04-18 06:16:56 AM  
A 16 year old Angelina Jolie does make good eye bleach for the wrinkled up prune of a hag Queen of England.

Personal insult to the queen, my ass. What with the kind of crap that her crotch fruit (and their crotch fruit and spouses) have pulled for decades, I think that she has some pretty thick leathery skin by now.

 
jonnypeh [TotalFark] 2008-04-18 06:19:58 AM  
BomboChipolata: Firstly: Fark the Daily Mail. A bunch of toadying, suck-up royal-lovers to a man. They are so far up the collective royal Gary, they have no idea the British empire collapsed ages ago under the weight of its own jingoistic bullshiat.

Secondly: Fark the royal family - every single one of the scrounging, feckless, inbred scum. Swanning around like they own the place because the meek-minded UK public have taken in the derriere from them for hundreds of years and are too pathetic to do what the French did and get rid of them (OK, Scots excepted). Every time I see a picture of one of the irritating shiats grinning into the cameras while on holiday in one of their houses in some country or other, I want to vomit.

Wake up, Britain. You're being screwed *and* paying for the privilege. At least have them all sterilized so they can't breed any more bottom-feeding filth to plague the country.

/Brit - English, in fact.
//No, I don't really care what you might think - but thanks for asking.



commie.

 
nathimuspr1me 2008-04-18 06:36:16 AM  
haver...is that anything like havening?

 
Egon Spengler 2008-04-18 06:36:40 AM  
Jamieboy
BomboChipolata: Firstly: Fark the Daily Mail. A bunch of toadying, suck-up royal-lovers to a man. They are so far up the collective royal Gary, they have no idea the British empire collapsed ages ago under the weight of its own jingoistic bullshiat.


I guess you never saw a copy of "Majesty Magazine". Talk about toadying suck up royal lovers. I have a couple of old copies about and a friend of mine thought they were MAD Magazine spoofs.

Is it anything like Fascist Dictator Monthly?

I award an internet to anyone who catches that reference.

 
Day_Old_Dutchie 2008-04-18 06:44:18 AM  
Everyone would gather
On the twenty-fourth of May
Sitting in the sand
To watch the fireworks display.
Dancing fires on the beach,
Singing songs together...
Though it's just a memory,
Some memories last forever.


/Rush - From Ontario (obviously)

 
mirth_in_a_jiffy 2008-04-18 06:56:15 AM  
I currently reside in Bermuda and I've heard very little about this, but then again as an expat, I am told to keep my nose out of their affairs.

/I'll take off whatever days they give me

 
quatchi 2008-04-18 07:16:09 AM  
give me doughnuts: Everyone seems to have missed the most important part: the side-bar story that includes swimsuit shots of Angelina Jolie when she was 16.

Good eye.

i293.photobucket.com

Let's make Angelina Jolie's Birthday a National Holiday!

Call it "Fapday" or sommat.

The Queen? Fark that saurkraut suckin' wench with a corgi!

 
LowPlainsDrifter 2008-04-18 08:10:18 AM  
Churchill2004: Bermuda is farking awesome. Government's a bit heavy handed, though.

Yeah. I was reviewing Caribbean destinations this week, trying to see where I'd like to vacation next spring. Most of the islands are totally relaxed and have few real laws or restrictions. Then we get to Bermuda. Christ, for people living on a set of tropical islands they have to be the most uptight and rigid farks on the planet. If you can't loosen up living in the Caribbean then there is something seriously wrong on the "control issues" front. It is *painfully* obvious that they've held onto every Law And Order boneheaded thought Britain every produced.

Some of the more fun islands, especially those of French heritage, look to me like the best choice. Any place that encourages nudity and toplessness, well, that's just my kind of place.

 
Gsm136 [TotalFark] 2008-04-18 08:33:22 AM  
blitzy: i was about to lose faith... thank you



Will you send me a letter from America?

 
TheGreyPiper 2008-04-18 08:56:26 AM  
lordargent: FredaDeStilleto : As often as I have tried, I could never haver my shorts into a knot.

You need bermuda shorts.


Touche!

 
TheGreyPiper 2008-04-18 08:57:08 AM  
named: There is a Bermuda shorts joke in there too I think.

There was. You missed it.

 
TheGreyPiper 2008-04-18 08:59:39 AM  
BomboChipolata: Firstly: Fark the Daily Mail. A bunch of toadying, suck-up royal-lovers to a man. They are so far up the collective royal Gary, they have no idea the British empire collapsed ages ago under the weight of its own jingoistic bullshiat.

Secondly: Fark the royal family - every single one of the scrounging, feckless, inbred scum. Swanning around like they own the place because the meek-minded UK public have taken in the derriere from them for hundreds of years and are too pathetic to do what the French did and get rid of them (OK, Scots excepted). Every time I see a picture of one of the irritating shiats grinning into the cameras while on holiday in one of their houses in some country or other, I want to vomit.

Wake up, Britain. You're being screwed *and* paying for the privilege. At least have them all sterilized so they can't breed any more bottom-feeding filth to plague the country.

/Brit - English, in fact.
//No, I don't really care what you might think - but thanks for asking.


Off with your head.

/Preferably as the culmination of the old hanging, drawing and quartering routine.

//Staunch Royalist.
///When the revolution comes, you'll be looking for me.

 
mirth_in_a_jiffy 2008-04-18 09:07:33 AM  
LowPlainsDrifter: Churchill2004: Bermuda is farking awesome. Government's a bit heavy handed, though.

Yeah. I was reviewing Caribbean destinations this week, trying to see where I'd like to vacation next spring. Most of the islands are totally relaxed and have few real laws or restrictions. Then we get to Bermuda. Christ, for people living on a set of tropical islands they have to be the most uptight and rigid farks on the planet. If you can't loosen up living in the Caribbean then there is something seriously wrong on the "control issues" front. It is *painfully* obvious that they've held onto every Law And Order boneheaded thought Britain every produced.

Some of the more fun islands, especially those of French heritage, look to me like the best choice. Any place that encourages nudity and toplessness, well, that's just my kind of place.


I really hate to point this out, but we're closer to Canada than the Caribbean

 
LowPlainsDrifter 2008-04-18 09:15:45 AM  
mirth_in_a_jiffy: LowPlainsDrifter: Churchill2004: Bermuda is farking awesome. Government's a bit heavy handed, though.

Yeah. I was reviewing Caribbean destinations this week, trying to see where I'd like to vacation next spring. Most of the islands are totally relaxed and have few real laws or restrictions. Then we get to Bermuda. Christ, for people living on a set of tropical islands they have to be the most uptight and rigid farks on the planet. If you can't loosen up living in the Caribbean then there is something seriously wrong on the "control issues" front. It is *painfully* obvious that they've held onto every Law And Order boneheaded thought Britain every produced.

Some of the more fun islands, especially those of French heritage, look to me like the best choice. Any place that encourages nudity and toplessness, well, that's just my kind of place.

I really hate to point this out, but we're closer to Canada than the Caribbean


I'm aware of that. But do a search on "Caribbean islands" or "Caribbean vacation" and as sure as rain is wet the results will almost always lead you, at some point, to Bermuda.

And no, I have no idea why, but that's what happens.

 
12bnbda 2008-04-18 09:18:07 AM  
LowPlainsDrifter: .

Yeah. I was reviewing Caribbean destinations this week, trying to see where I'd like to vacation next spring. Most of the islands are totally relaxed and have few real laws or restrictions. Then we get to Bermuda. Christ, for people living on a set of tropical islands they have to be the most uptight and rigid farks on the planet. If you can't loosen up living in the Caribbean then there is something seriously wrong on the "control issues" front. It is *painfully* obvious that they've held onto every Law And Order boneheaded thought Britain every produced.

Some of the more fun islands, especially those of French heritage, look to me like the best choice. Any place that encourages nudity and toplessness, well, that's just my kind of place.


If uptight and rigid = clean, prosperous, and safe, then I will take that over impoverished, residents-living-in-shacks-made-from-banana-boxes, don't-leave-the-resort-or-you-gonna-get-raped anyday.

And Bermuda is not in the Caribbean. Due east of Cape Hatteras.

/57 days and counting 'til I touch down in BDA

 
your mother 2008-04-18 09:26:18 AM  
customs there was a biatch, i've been to a lot of places and customs is always a pain, but they were like insistent that I was bringing pot or something in, it was crazy...

i went about a month and a half ago, i wanted it to be warmer, so be careful when you go, it's not the heat like in the Caribbean that people imagine. but it was nice being there in the off season i can't imagine how many people would be there otherwise. the houses are so cool.

 
LowPlainsDrifter 2008-04-18 09:30:49 AM  
12bnbda: LowPlainsDrifter: .

Yeah. I was reviewing Caribbean destinations this week, trying to see where I'd like to vacation next spring. Most of the islands are totally relaxed and have few real laws or restrictions. Then we get to Bermuda. Christ, for people living on a set of tropical islands they have to be the most uptight and rigid farks on the planet. If you can't loosen up living in the Caribbean then there is something seriously wrong on the "control issues" front. It is *painfully* obvious that they've held onto every Law And Order boneheaded thought Britain every produced.

Some of the more fun islands, especially those of French heritage, look to me like the best choice. Any place that encourages nudity and toplessness, well, that's just my kind of place.

If uptight and rigid = clean, prosperous, and safe, then I will take that over impoverished, residents-living-in-shacks-made-from-banana-boxes, don't-leave-the-resort-or-you-gonna-get-raped anyday.


Because if it's not Bermuda, it's Crap, right? heh
Lots of nice islands besides Bermuda, fyi.

And Bermuda is not in the Caribbean. Due east of Cape Hatteras.

/57 days and counting 'til I touch down in BDA


I know where Bermuda is. What I was (unsuccessfully) trying to convey was that I was doing a Google on "Caribbean islands" and every time I went to a source of information, Bermuda always seemed to be on the page. So I'd click and then go "wait...what?!?" when looking at the 4,324,222 rules associated with a visit to Bermuda.

If you need proof of this, do a google on Caribbean islands. If you go to "summary" type pages that list them all you'll almost always see Bermuda on there somewhere. And as I said in my last post, I have no idea why.

 
mirth_in_a_jiffy 2008-04-18 09:43:17 AM  
LowPlainsDrifter:


If uptight and rigid = clean, prosperous, and safe, then I will take that over impoverished, residents-living-in-shacks-made-from-banana-boxes, don't-leave-the-resort-or-you-gonna-get-raped anyday.


/57 days and counting 'til I touch down in BDA


THIS

I've lived in Bermuda for over a year and the people are friendly as long as you say hi to them.

/I think it's time for a Bermuda Fark Party

 
xria 2008-04-18 09:54:14 AM  
BomboChipolata

Firstly: Fark the Daily Mail. A bunch of toadying, suck-up royal-lovers to a man. They are so far up the collective royal Gary, they have no idea the British empire collapsed ages ago under the weight of its own jingoistic bullshiat.

Secondly: Fark the royal family - every single one of the scrounging, feckless, inbred scum. Swanning around like they own the place because the meek-minded UK public have taken in the derriere from them for hundreds of years and are too pathetic to do what the French did and get rid of them (OK, Scots excepted). Every time I see a picture of one of the irritating shiats grinning into the cameras while on holiday in one of their houses in some country or other, I want to vomit.

Wake up, Britain. You're being screwed *and* paying for the privilege. At least have them all sterilized so they can't breed any more bottom-feeding filth to plague the country.

/Brit - English, in fact.
//No, I don't really care what you might think - but thanks for asking.


I seem to remember England previously did exactly what you suggest, and ended up with a megalomaniac religious extremist in charge instead, which fairly closely matches what happened in France as well, so it doesn't seem like it is always a good idea (as long as the monarch isn't being a dick and abusing their powers I guess). And I seem to remember the current royalty is more down to Scotland than England (and Germany more than both of those), so not sure why you are giving them a free pass on anything related to the topic.

You also seem to have the facts backwards on cost, for 2007 for example:

This profit is the net income the government receives from the Crown Estate and certain other hereditary revenues. This financial year the gross income was 184.8 million pounds. In return, the government funds the costs of the British Crown, which last year were 37.4 million pounds. The profit therefore amounts to 147.4 million pounds.

I never really understood principle republicanism - I can understand that if you were actually being restricted in some way, or had the threat of it, from a member of the monarchy that you would want to replace them with something else. When they are just part of the furniture of the governmental system, and have no legal way of actually influencing the government outside of the same ways any media celebrity might be able to, who gives a damn?

 
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