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(Some Guy) Obvious You never want to accept a package of marijuana that's hand-delivered by the police (w/ "Buttsecks?" mugshot)   (thenorthwestern.com) divider line 63
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T.M.S. [TotalFark] 2008-04-13 01:56:49 AM  
He was arrested after taking the package from the porch, and acknowledged he was expecting the package and knew it contained marijuana

It was just a box sent to his address via a non US governmental carrier.

He had no prior knowlege of who had sent it, nor what it contained. It was a box with his address. Nothing more.

For some reason he revealed knowlege of the impending (illegal)content delivery to the authorities.

I can only assume he is not a student of US drug laws.

 
clancifer [TotalFark] 2008-04-13 02:06:52 AM  
The Sheboygan County Multi-Jurisdictional Enforcement Group, the county drug unit, received a phone call in the early morning hours Thursday alerting them that a package of marijuana was being delivered from California via FedEx.

Sounds like he picked the wrong day to dump his girlfriend.

 
cambie [TotalFark] 2008-04-13 02:26:22 AM  
I love the FedEx man. He's a drug dealer and doesn't even know it.

Seriously though, who the hell ratted him out here? I hear people FedEx pot from CA all the time, and have very little issue.

 
xtex 2008-04-13 02:30:14 AM  
I'm amazed more people don't get caught this way; you'd think the feds would just park some drug dogs in the FedEx/UPS sorting facilities...

 
Cagey B [TotalFark] 2008-04-13 02:59:14 AM  
Random Lake...that sounds like an interesting place to live.

 
colatf [TotalFark] 2008-04-13 03:16:15 AM  
cambie: I love the FedEx man. He's a drug dealer and doesn't even know it.

And he's always... on time.

 
Derek313 2008-04-13 03:16:32 AM  
I'm more of a DHL guy.

 
McBotulism 2008-04-13 03:19:10 AM  
img.photobucket.com

 
McBotulism 2008-04-13 03:19:50 AM  
img.photobucket.com

 
EsteeFlwrPot 2008-04-13 03:20:32 AM  
I like FedEx. UPS... eh, not so much.

 
McBotulism 2008-04-13 03:20:52 AM  
img.photobucket.com

 
War_Kittens 2008-04-13 03:21:04 AM  
Wow. This country is out of control. 25 years old and he'll probably never be able to get a job again with that on his record. Six years in jail for 2 pounds of pot he was probably going to use mostly himself and distribute to some "friends". Now, he has a criminal record with drug charges that will prevent him from being gainfully employed and whatever jail time he serves. Non violent offender today, god knows what in six years.

\Good jorb DEA
\\Morans

 
TheJoe03 [TotalFark] 2008-04-13 03:23:09 AM  
EsteeFlwrPot: I like FedEx. UPS... eh, not so much.

You don't like the United Pot Smokers?

/Old joke, I know.

 
SharkUW 2008-04-13 03:25:18 AM  
War_Kittens: Wow. This country is out of control. 25 years old and he'll probably never be able to get a job again with that on his record. Six years in jail for 2 pounds of pot he was probably going to use mostly himself and distribute to some "friends". Now, he has a criminal record with drug charges that will prevent him from being gainfully employed and whatever jail time he serves. Non violent offender today, god knows what in six years.

\Good jorb DEA
\\Morans


Hey, he can still deal drugs. I think he should get a different supplier though. This one seemed a bit off.

 
permaculture 2008-04-13 03:26:08 AM  
My name? Oh, sure. It's, ... it's ... Toby, er, um, D, er, um, Frank, ... Hess. Yeah, Frank-Hess.

Toby D. Frank-Hess

 
WFern 2008-04-13 03:32:51 AM  
You know what? I thoroughly oppose the criminalization of marijuana, but this idiot got what he probably deserved. I just find it difficult to sympathize with anyone so blatantly stupid about this matter.

 
rackrent [TotalFark] 2008-04-13 03:33:05 AM  
Cagey B: Random Lake...that sounds like an interesting place to live

I understand that's Werner Heisenberg's address?

 
WFern 2008-04-13 03:35:55 AM  
McBotulism: [Bulbsecks?]

Tell me that isn't real. Why would you even think to put one there?

 
Hacker_X 2008-04-13 03:37:27 AM  
lolmao666: The DEA and the CIA are dealing drugs, that's a fact. From Colombia to Afghanistan, to Kosovo... it's a huge business, and black market money can be used for a lot of interesting stuff. Corrupting politicians, corrupting foreign governments, corrupting soldiers... black budgets for the CIA and other secret agency...

Seriously. You think the government don't deal drugs? They bring most of it in here.


So I take it you are one of those people who get *really* paranoid after smoking.

 
Elvis Christ 2008-04-13 03:41:06 AM  
If you can't do the time, don't do the crime.

I'm sure he's a liberal, though, and will sue for a lesser sentence for breaking the law.

 
TheMega 2008-04-13 03:42:26 AM  
Random Lake? Flood a lot?

/at random, even?
//exit, stage right...

i32.tinypic.com

 
Relatively Obscure [TotalFark] 2008-04-13 03:42:46 AM  
War_Kittens: Six years in jail for 2 pounds of pot he was probably going to use mostly himself

Holy crap.

 
tehotherbilly 2008-04-13 03:43:20 AM  
"Dave's not here man..."

 
Lars The Canadian Viking 2008-04-13 03:45:39 AM  
Idiot. You ship it without tracking, act suprised when the package arrives, and don't have any drugs in the place your getting it delivered to.

 
tuna fingers 2008-04-13 03:48:37 AM  
Elvis Christ: If you can't do the time, don't do the crime.

I'm sure he's a liberal, though, and will sue for a lesser sentence for breaking the law.


I'm sure he's a liberal too. You saw the pic of him fearing the butt reaming, didn't you?
Only teh fags say "if you can't do the time, don't do the crime."

 
WFern 2008-04-13 03:50:54 AM  
morning_foil: WFern: McBotulism: [Bulbsecks?]

Tell me that isn't real. Why would you even think to put one there?

He really, really wanted to see what was up there.


Scary thought: how often would they break during placement?

 
thesloppy 2008-04-13 03:54:02 AM  
Anybody worth their salt running mail-order in North America uses the good ol' postal service, and always has, as far as I know.

 
tuna fingers 2008-04-13 03:58:25 AM  
I'm going to go ahead and give myself a pat on the back. I slammed Elvis and his affiliation by merely repeating his own words.

Good one, me.

 
dj42 2008-04-13 04:02:17 AM  
WFern: You know what? I thoroughly oppose the criminalization of marijuana, but this idiot got what he probably deserved. I just find it difficult to sympathize with anyone so blatantly stupid about this matter.

What a nonsensical opinion. So you "thoroughly oppose the criminalization," but think he should be be convicted of a crime?

Do you see anything wrong with that line of thinking?

So only the "smart criminals" are protected under your opinion of decriminalization?

 
Egon Spengler 2008-04-13 04:04:18 AM  
uhh dont know what that is in the rectum x-ray, care to elucidate?


/scared

Also, FTFA: He was arrested after taking the package from the porch, and acknowledged he was expecting the package and knew it contained marijuana.


YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG, bonus unprescribed meds in the pocket.

 
nmemkha 2008-04-13 04:08:38 AM  
thesloppy: Anybody worth their salt running mail-order in North America uses the good ol' postal service, and always has, as far as I know.

Good advice! Add Federal charges for misusing US mail ...

 
signaljammer 2008-04-13 04:11:06 AM  
There was a time when narcs were held in low esteem by their brother officers. They were considered underwear sniffers who lacked a sporting instinct, as their quarry's weren't even possessed of their faculties. Under this regime, two-pump chumps like this guy were returned to society after an afternoon of terror.
What does Piper Laurie say to Paul Newman (at first) in 'The Hustler?' You're just too hungry.

 
Elvis Christ 2008-04-13 04:35:22 AM  
tuna fingers:

I'm sure he's a liberal too. You saw the pic of him fearing the butt reaming, didn't you?
Only teh fags say "if you can't do the time, don't do the crime."


If he was a liberal he wouldn't fear the butt reaming. Liberals love butt reamings.

 
Gestalt 2008-04-13 04:35:47 AM  
cmsimg.thenorthwestern.com
"Dude, I am so high right now."

 
o4tuna 2008-04-13 04:38:49 AM  
A long, long time ago, I ran around with a guy from Hawaii. Every Thursday, he got a package of 1lb of Hawaiian pot, plus a surprise of whatever his dealer in Hawaii was getting a good deal on that week. Some times it'd be acid, or hash, or Ludes, or crank or whatever. Good times...

Oh yeah, where was I?

They were shipped via overnight UPS, as was the return payment.

She sealed it in double vacuum sealed bags & dropped it in a overnight envelope. Neither one ever worried about getting caught. Hell they're probably still doin' it, for all I know. Was 25 years ago...

/Get off my lawn!

 
JerkyMeat 2008-04-13 04:42:22 AM  
That is why I have a robot who retrieves my mail.

 
WFern 2008-04-13 04:43:08 AM  
dj42: What a nonsensical opinion. So you "thoroughly oppose the criminalization," but think he should be be convicted of a crime?

Do you see anything wrong with that line of thinking?

So only the "smart criminals" are protected under your opinion of decriminalization?


My opinion is this: marijuana should not be illegal, nor should the man have been jailed by his government for dealing in it. However, don't expect me to feel sorry for the man or to come running to his rescue when he puts himself in that position.

To provide another example, I remember a story acquired on Fark about a man who had walked onto a railway while chatting on his phone. He was too distracted to hear the oncoming train and was subsequently hit. Did he deserve to die? Of course not, but it's not about to stop me from mocking that behavior, nor will I lose any sleep over the event.

 
Cyno01 [TotalFark] 2008-04-13 04:44:11 AM  
xtex: I'm amazed more people don't get caught this way; you'd think the feds would just park some drug dogs in the FedEx/UPS sorting facilities...

The conviction rate for this kind of thing is probably so ridiculously low it wouldnt be worth it. From the article it sounds like the guy was an idiot and admited to it, but all you have to say is "I wasnt expecting any package, hmm... do you know what it is fedex guy? No? Ok, see you later." and youve established enough resonable doubt for any decent lawyer to get you off the hook.

 
WOBB 2008-04-13 04:51:03 AM  
thesloppy: Anybody worth their salt running mail-order in North America uses the good ol' postal service, and always has, as far as I know.

For those of you who might be thinking of taking thesloppy's advice, check this article from my hometown paper. Pops Link (new window)

BTW he got the minimum but that happens to be 12 long years...

 
Ed Grubermann [TotalFark] 2008-04-13 04:51:38 AM  
permaculture: My name? Oh, sure. It's, ... it's ... Toby, er, um, D, er, um, Frank, ... Hess. Yeah, Frank-Hess.
Toby D. Frank-Hess


You misspelled "Maxwell Houser".

/And now I'm going to kill myself for admitting I ever saw that movie.

 
BeSerious 2008-04-13 04:56:38 AM  
/Sheboygay

 
Slug2468 [TotalFark] 2008-04-13 05:02:57 AM  
You have the right to remain silent dumbass. Don't say a word other than "Lawyer, Please". Wait, that's two words. Whatever, just shut your whore mouth.

 
King Something [TotalFark] 2008-04-13 05:03:13 AM  
"Buttsecks?" mugshot

img90.imageshack.us
"Penis goes WHERE?"

 
Jamieboy 2008-04-13 05:49:38 AM  
I wish I had the balls to have a friend, who lives in a place that grows some eff'ing good stuff, fed-ex me some. But with the draconian drug laws in our police state, its just not worth it. Especially at my time of life. I could loose everything I ever worked for with the ring of the door bell. Oh well, maybe someday things will be different. LIke when pigs fly.

 
ialdabaoth 2008-04-13 05:50:45 AM  
King Something: "Buttsecks?" mugshot


"Penis goes WHERE?"


given that that's Bridgett, generally somewhere around post 17 to 21.

 
thesloppy 2008-04-13 06:38:47 AM  
nmemkha: thesloppy: Anybody worth their salt running mail-order in North America uses the good ol' postal service, and always has, as far as I know.

Good advice! Add Federal charges for misusing US mail ...


Actually, that IS the rub. It takes a federal warrant to open US mail and then a controlled delivery with federal agents...and believe it or not, as long as you keep things small, you're not going to draw that kind of heat. On the other hand, FedEx and UPS require no warrant to open their packages, and the resulting bust can be made by the guys down at your local police office...who just might not have anything better to do, depending on where you're located. Regardless, once you start shipping anything in the range of pounds, all bets are off. Once you're seen as a distributor rather a customer, the law has an entirely different attitude towards you.

 
thelordofcheese 2008-04-13 08:10:37 AM  
While I was high yesterday and carrying my flask around some street slingers offered to hustle me some white for only $10.
/like I'm gonna buy off of street dealers
//like I'm gonna buy speed

 
BitwiseShift 2008-04-13 08:20:02 AM  
I once ordered a dress some clothes from an outfit call SheBoy. When the package arrived it didn't smell like pot.

 
LavenderWolf 2008-04-13 08:52:56 AM  
Why ship? Buy local, support your Local 420!

 
dougfm 2008-04-13 09:23:50 AM  
He was also charged with possession of drug paraphernalia, a misdemeanor with a penalty of up to 30 days in jail.

I'm sure he's sweating that, while looking at 6 years for the dope.

 
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