I am sure all 4 talents are derived from marital experience. Although we should make fun on the retarded or his wife.

Go ahead... elect McCain

/He does better frozen fries.

Oh? She's destined to be First Lady? Is subby on the board of Diebold and know something we don't?

I think Abigail Adams and Dolly Madison may be the top two, but she could very will place third.

Should be better than some of those other stuffy biatches w/ sticks up their morally superior asses.

So your daddy owning a Budweiser distributorship makes you a "beer heiress" now?
Hmmm.

Unfortunately, McCain became involved with Cindy while he was still married to his first wife.

This is adultery and will not be tolerated by the Party of Family Values^TM and their pure, righteous evangelical allies, who will, of course, mention his sins frequently and declare that he is not fit to be President.

Oh, wait, McCain has an "R" next to his name...never mind, no problem here.

More like Best. First Lady. Nevar.

I'm gonna miss Laura Bush the drug zombie who killed her boyfriend.

Goodspeed, Lumpy.

I doubt Obama would ever leave Michelle for the Stepford wife. That's probably still her best chance to win that title, though.

Best. First. Lady.Blogger. Evar?

If people with stories like these wrote them, they'd still be cool.

Special Ed Teacher, huh?

Is that the kind that bang their students?

Lionel Mandrake: Unfortunately, McCain became involved with Cindy while he was still married to his first wife.

This is adultery and will not be tolerated by the Party of Family ValuesTM and their pure, righteous evangelical allies, who will, of course, mention his sins frequently and declare that he is not fit to be President.

Oh, wait, McCain has an "R" next to his name...never mind, no problem here.

I still think the saddest part is the painkiller episode. I think it was the first time she really began to realize what she had done to herself by marrying McCain. I think she is actually a good woman and it must have been very hard for her to admit to herself that he only married her for the money to further his ambitions. The only possible reason that I can think she stayed is because of the kids.

Did you know that she is strongly pro-choice? I bet that is something that doesn't get brought up in Republican circles.

Best. First. Lady. Evar?

McCain thread?

It's missing something:



That's better.

RagingLeonard: So your daddy owning a Budweiser distributorship makes you a "beer heiress" now?
Hmmm.

She's worth $100 million, so yeah, I guess so.

worlddan: Lionel Mandrake: Unfortunately, McCain became involved with Cindy while he was still married to his first wife.

This is adultery and will not be tolerated by the Party of Family ValuesTM and their pure, righteous evangelical allies, who will, of course, mention his sins frequently and declare that he is not fit to be President.

Oh, wait, McCain has an "R" next to his name...never mind, no problem here.

I still think the saddest part is the painkiller episode. I think it was the first time she really began to realize what she had done to herself by marrying McCain. I think she is actually a good woman and it must have been very hard for her to admit to herself that he only married her for the money to further his ambitions. The only possible reason that I can think she stayed is because of the kids.

Did you know that she is strongly pro-choice? I bet that is something that doesn't get brought up in Republican circles.

I dig the fact that you NEVER see his adopted non-lily white daughter.

What does a First Lady do, really?

They always give her some trite little "cause" that everybody supports anyway just so she'll have something to do and stay out of the way.

I mean, don't get me wrong, I guess Cindy McCain's alright, but why should I let her influence my opinion of John as President at all?

PullmyHair: Hey, now, it almost worked last time, remember?

Wait, so you're saying that John McCain is similar to John Kerry because they're both married to heiresses?

Or do you know something about Theresa Heinz-Kerry and stealing painkillers to feed her habit that I'm not aware of?

Hideously Gigantic Smurf: What does a First Lady do, really?

1. Bring peace to Ireland
2. Bring peace to Bosnia
3. Craft NAFTA
4. Improve the economy

Just to name a few...

McCain cheated on his first wife (the mother of his first three children, who we never see or hear about). Oh yeah, and after his first wife was crippled in a car accident he left her for someone 20 years younger and worth $100 million more.

Nice.

I don't know what's worse, that, or when Cindy McCain created a medical charity to send painkillers to soldiers abroad and then was caught by the feds for stealing from her own charity to support her own drug habit.

But he's a well-respected maverick! Love that straight-talk express!

KrispyKringle: PullmyHair: Hey, now, it almost worked last time, remember?

Wait, so you're saying that John McCain is similar to John Kerry because they're both married to heiresses?


That's the way I took it. It's a time honored tradition. The winner of them all is actually John Warner (R-VA). He actually divorced his wife (heir to the Mellon fortune) for a cool $30 million.

Has she never really been proud of her country? 'Cause I understand that seems to be an important issue...

Jesus. It's like Teresa Heinz, Betty Ford, and Laura Bush were all programmed into the same Stepford Wife.

KrispyKringle: 1. Bring peace to Ireland
2. Bring peace to Bosnia
3. Craft NAFTA
4. Improve the economy

Just to name a few...

IXNAY ON THE AFTANAY

Beer heiress or no, I still think Michelle Obama could crush more beer cans per hour against her forehead. And frankly, is there a more important standard for our First Lady?

/and don't get me started on who has better taste in men

Hey she went to the same High School as me.

That's enough for me who do I send my check to?!!

/Central High School.

Logweasel: IXNAY ON THE AFTANAY

Why? She was for it before she was against it.

hotter than the ads: /and don't get me started on who has better taste in men



Do you ever look at these two and wonder what they must look like when they're having sex?

GRRR! GRRRR! Don't stop! I'm almost there! GRRRRRRR!

Yeah, but can she dodge sniper fire? This is clearly an important part of the duties of the first lady.

Is there *any* first lady outside of maybe Rosalynn Carter who didn't have some wackiness going on in her past?

EW! She was just THIRTEEN when he was a POW!

Please, Dolley Madison could kick her ass while simultaneously cooking bacon and saving priceless artworks.

Hideously Gigantic Smurf: What does a First Lady do, really?


Get pinned down by sniper fire.

Might Cindy McCain be the Best. First. Lady. Evar?

I at least bet she was proud of America before this year, unlike Obama's big yap of a wife.

barneyfifesbullet: I at least bet she was proud of America before this year, unlike Obama's big yap of a wife.

So was Obama's wife.

Are you really this stupid or are you just hopping everyone else is?

Approves

barneyfifesbullet: Might Cindy McCain be the Best. First. Lady. Evar?

I at least bet she was really proud of America before this year, unlike Obama's big yap of a wife.


/ftfy
//context FTW

KrispyKringle: Hideously Gigantic Smurf: What does a First Lady do, really?

1. Bring peace to Ireland
2. Bring peace to Bosnia
3. Craft NAFTA
4. Improve the economy

5. Dodge sniper fire (PEW PEW PEW!!!)
6. Single-handedlytake out Nazi machine gun nests
7. Sustain eldritch chants to keep the mighty Cthulhu peacefully at rest in R'lyeh for another generation...
8. Select window treatments for the Lincoln Bedroom

Corvus: Are you really this stupid or are you just hopping everyone else is?

I can spell. That's what confused you.

Do you fark on first dates
Does you Dad own a brewery
Could I feel Your tits
Or would you show 'em to me
Cause you've got a nice head
And you look pretty honest
So me face'll be leavin' in quart of an hour
I'd like you to be on it

/Kevin Bloody Wilson FTW

She wasn't just addicted to painkillers, subby. She stole from charity to fuel her painkiller addiction. You left out the best part.

Crunchy Frog:
Do you fark on first dates
Does you Dad own a brewery
Could I feel Your tits
Or would you show 'em to me
Cause you've got a nice head
And you look pretty honest
So me face'll be leavin' in quart of an hour
I'd like you to be on it

/Kevin Bloody Wilson FTW


How about: "How come we see your pretty white ass on the campaign all the time but it is like your adopted sister disappeared? I mean, does your dad throw kin under the bus for politics?"

The Homer Tax: She wasn't just addicted to painkillers, subby. She stole from charity to fuel her painkiller addiction. You left out the best part.


And it only came out in public after a former employee ratted her.

Really, I'm kinda starting to lean with the McCain is a slime ass side of things. Liked him in 2000. then read more about him.

boomaze: How about: "How come we see your pretty white ass on the campaign all the time but it is like your adopted sister disappeared? I mean, does your dad throw kin under the bus for politics?"

Guess she's not hawt enough for the campaign trail...

boomaze:
Really, I'm kinda starting to lean with the McCain is a slime ass side of things. Liked him in 2000. then read more about him.

Exactly. He was one of the few Republicans I thought I could be alright with a few years ago. This election has changed him.

Crunchy Frog: Guess she's not hawt white enough for the campaign trail...

FTFY.

The base, she is somewhat racist :)

>> The Homer Tax: She wasn't just addicted to painkillers, subby. She stole from charity to fuel her painkiller addiction. You left out the best part.

In other words if she hadn't been born on 3rd base she'd be sellin blow jobs for 10 bucks to score her hillbilly heroin and she'd spend 3 months a year in jail.

But since she's rich she "had a problem"

boomaze: Really, I'm kinda starting to lean with the McCain is a slime ass side of things. Liked him in 2000. then read more about him.

He was likable then, now he teabags all the farkers that smeared him and his family, and tows the party line even when it is in direct opposition to his stated principles.

Maverick No More!