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(Toronto Star) Dumbass Mock samurai sword fight at martial arts dojo sends man to hospital. There can be only one punctured lung   (thestar.com) divider line 39
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5978 clicks; posted to Main » on 23 Mar 2008 at 4:49 PM   |  Make this a Fark FavoriteFavorite    |   share: Share on OMGTWITTER WEB2.0share on StumbleUponshare on Facebook  more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!

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strangeguitar 2008-03-23 04:36:23 PM  
i227.photobucket.com
That's what I call "training".
/with apologies to Buck Henry

 
eff ewe 2008-03-23 04:51:01 PM  
Belushi FTW.

 
icanhazstapler [recently expired TotalFark] 2008-03-23 04:51:40 PM  
Guess it wasn't such a "mock" sword fight after all!

 
BigSnatch [TotalFark] 2008-03-23 04:52:25 PM  
Now he will become a master of the Iron Lung.

 
The Invisible Sky Wizard 2008-03-23 04:52:42 PM  
Looks like he didn't have overdraft protection on his 1000 years of power.

 
PhiloeBedoe [TotalFark] 2008-03-23 04:53:02 PM  
Swords will cut you wide open.

 
wallytacker 2008-03-23 04:58:11 PM  
www.cnn.com

huh huh...swordfight

 
jumac 2008-03-23 05:03:25 PM  
if the student dose not live through the lesson then he was not worthy of the lesson

 
Danger Avoid Death 2008-03-23 05:07:26 PM  
Silly caucasian playing with samurai swords.

 
Dero 2008-03-23 05:08:17 PM  
I like how they added a second unrelated, yet stab-related story to lengthen the article.

 
missinglinks14 2008-03-23 05:08:36 PM  
hey a round about related question, ya know the commercial for Avis with the car complaining that it has been staring at the cement wall, she smells like new car, etc..
well i think the guy narrating that commercial is the bad guy from The Highlander.
That is all.

 
jiesenPSD 2008-03-23 05:11:38 PM  
now that's a stabbing.

 
Aluminum Falcon 2008-03-23 05:16:59 PM  
Master of a different technique... (pops)

...is not impressed.

 
Jedekai 2008-03-23 05:18:23 PM  
When I read this, all I could think of was the following:

"I have realized something, Master"
"What is that, student?"
"Not a single one of us can defeat you."
"You gain wisdom, child."
"So we'll have to gang up on you, GET 'IM GUYS!"

Here's the link to one of the greatest skits in history:

The Fanatics - Ti Kwan Leap (Boot To The Head)

Link (new window)

 
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener [TotalFark] 2008-03-23 05:22:41 PM  
i210.photobucket.com

 
Ed Finnerty 2008-03-23 05:36:21 PM  
Jedekai: When I read this, all I could think of was the following:

"I have realized something, Master"
"What is that, student?"
"Not a single one of us can defeat you."
"You gain wisdom, child."
"So we'll have to gang up on you, GET 'IM GUYS!"

Here's the link to one of the greatest skits in history:

The Fanatics - Ti Kwan Leap (Boot To The Head)

Link (new window)


Ed Gruberman would be proud.

 
analectomy 2008-03-23 05:40:29 PM  
the lung punturer was actually in cahoots with the club robber and it was some kind of man-love ritual where they stab someone at the same time from which they derive sexual pleasure simultaneously.

the club robber was the only one to accomplish this, as he is currently facing a prison sentence.

 
pinch_harmonics 2008-03-23 05:42:03 PM  
Toronto police Staff Sgt. Paul Scudds said an ambulance was called to a building on Queen St. E., east of Woodbine Ave., around 1:45 a.m. where attendants found a man who had been accidentally stabbed while he and a friend were playing with the sword.

Sensei's gonna open a can of whoop ass.

 
LordBollocks [TotalFark] 2008-03-23 06:07:02 PM  
usera.imagecave.com

 
eno 2008-03-23 06:19:31 PM  
heh heh heh... they said hot spot.

 
TastyEloi 2008-03-23 06:28:20 PM  
Ed Finnerty: Jedekai: When I read this, all I could think of was the following:

"I have realized something, Master"
"What is that, student?"
"Not a single one of us can defeat you."
"You gain wisdom, child."
"So we'll have to gang up on you, GET 'IM GUYS!"

Here's the link to one of the greatest skits in history:

The Fanatics - Ti Kwan Leap (Boot To The Head)

Link (new window)

Ed Gruberman would be proud.


I actually just listened to this the other day, off of an old Dr. Demento CD I have. Good stuff.

 
domine 2008-03-23 06:40:10 PM  
Mock samurai sword fight at martial arts dojo sends man to hospital. There can be only one punctured lung

/i see what you did there
//+1 subby
/// Highlander FTW

i193.photobucket.com

 
schizocat [recently expired TotalFark] 2008-03-23 06:41:26 PM  
Jedekai: The Fanatics - Ti Kwan Leap (Boot To The Head)

Link (new window)


That was the reading of the will, not Tae Kwan Leap. Both funny though.

Link (pops)

Audio only. Don't know that there is video. I've never seen it anyway.

 
Fark You 2008-03-23 06:53:12 PM  
Okay, serious question.... Does anyone know the dojo in reference?

 
Lane83 [TotalFark] 2008-03-23 06:57:09 PM  
Having trained for a little over a year in kenjutsu and Western fencing, and been active a while longer with practitioners of various martial arts, I can say this:

No real school ever permits its students to use live-edged weapons in training, unless you're cutting targets. Swords do not like to be hit against other swords. It causes them (mostly) irreparable damage. And with a decent Japanese-style sword costing you upwards of $250 a pop, that's not a cheap habit. That's why they make cheap wooden practice swords. No one gets a punctured lung or a punctured wallet.

I'd be willing to bet that this was a case of two jackasses horsing around and one of them getting stabbed.

 
methodlynx 2008-03-23 07:15:30 PM  
FAIL

i29.tinypic.com

 
Espertron 2008-03-23 07:19:22 PM  
bp3.blogger.com

 
Skwidd 2008-03-23 07:21:56 PM  
Lane83: I'd be willing to bet that this was a case of two jackasses horsing around and one of them getting stabbed.

In most places you can't even spar unsupervised (with gloves, pads, and headgear). Insurance won't cover it, and smart instructors won't put up with it (even without the insurance issue).

 
Danger Avoid Death 2008-03-23 07:50:08 PM  
Skwidd: Lane83: I'd be willing to bet that this was a case of two jackasses horsing around and one of them getting stabbed.

In most places you can't even spar unsupervised (with gloves, pads, and headgear). Insurance won't cover it, and smart instructors won't put up with it (even without the insurance issue).


Shhhh... Don't mention insurance. You might wake up Libbynomore2.

 
Edge.bot 2008-03-23 08:55:11 PM  
pfft ~ a REAL katana would have cut through the floor, the wall, an engine block, 3 guys in armour, a near infinite amount of shoji screens, a statue, some candles, some staircases, some more guys, a few inferior swords (any sword not a katana), a couple of guns, and STILL have the speeed and power to insta dice that dude ...punctured lung he got off lightly.

 
melancholy_art 2008-03-23 08:59:02 PM  
Reminds me of an Iaido class I was in once. The advanced students were over drawing live blades and practicing before class. There is a slight dragging then whistle noise as it comes out of the saya and is swung. I heard the dragging noise and then a burst of profanity coming from that side of the room. That guy never came back to class again, not sure how many stitches or fingers it cost him.

 
onomatopoeon 2008-03-23 09:11:18 PM  
Jedekai: When I read this, all I could think of was the following:

"I have realized something, Master"
"What is that, student?"
"Not a single one of us can defeat you."
"You gain wisdom, child."
"So we'll have to gang up on you, GET 'IM GUYS!"

Here's the link to one of the greatest skits in history:

The Fanatics - Ti Kwan Leap (Boot To The Head)

Link (new window)


Actually, the comedy troupe was known as The Frantics, composed of Rick Green, Dan Redican, Peter Wildman, and Paul Chato. Hilarious stuff, and fine Canadian boys, as well.

img84.imageshack.us

And for the rest of you closet ninjas:

img178.imageshack.us

 
MasterThief [TotalFark] 2008-03-23 09:42:37 PM  
You can have fake fighting with fake swords.
You can have real fighting with fake swords.
You can have fake fighting with real swords.
But this is the reason why you should never have real fighting with real swords.

 
dreadnaught 2008-03-23 10:21:59 PM  
Miso, Miso
Fighting in the Dojo
Miso, Miso
Oriental Prince in the land of soup!


/classic times... crazy days

 
Magorn 2008-03-23 11:03:10 PM  
Lane83: Having trained for a little over a year in kenjutsu and Western fencing, and been active a while longer with practitioners of various martial arts, I can say this:

No real school ever permits its students to use live-edged weapons in training, unless you're cutting targets. Swords do not like to be hit against other swords. It causes them (mostly) irreparable damage. And with a decent Japanese-style sword costing you upwards of $250 a pop, that's not a cheap habit. That's why they make cheap wooden practice swords. No one gets a punctured lung or a punctured wallet.

while helping a friend move in once we discovered a pair of swords the previous owner had left in the attic one was a made in india pot-metal saber such as adorns the walls of cheap vindaloo joints, the other it turned out was an authentic 16th century wakisashi from japan, rayskin handle silk wrapped menuki and a copper and silver hibaki. (War trophy I figured) with a blade that was pitted and chipped to uselessness , obvious from having been bashed against the other POS "blade"


needless tosay I almost cired


I'd be willing to bet that this was a case of two jackasses horsing around and one of them getting stabbed.

 
Fat Toad 2008-03-24 12:17:24 AM  
I can has
Bankai

 
Fat Toad 2008-03-24 12:21:16 AM  
Not impressed
media.movieweb.com

 
Lane83 [TotalFark] 2008-03-24 01:22:08 AM  
Magorn: needless tosay I almost cired

Shh... I'm hating the previous owner in my mind right now.

 
TheCenturion 2008-03-24 03:05:38 PM  

 
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