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(CBS New York) Strange Today's Fark-ready headline: Driver blames speeding on poorly dunked Oreo   (wcbstv.com) divider line 51
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nobozo 2008-03-22 07:17:02 PM  
No pity for dunken drivers.

/ lowhanging friut out of the way now

 
Begoggle 2008-03-22 07:18:46 PM  
Sounds like he confessed to distracted driving. Slap on another charge.

 
Crazymuthafarker [TotalFark] 2008-03-22 07:19:17 PM  
Lawsuit aimed at Nabisco in 3...2...1...

 
Witty Handle 2008-03-22 07:19:42 PM  
Well, who hasn't seen this scenario play itself a thousand times?

 
Bucky Katt [TotalFark] 2008-03-22 07:20:11 PM  
hey, seems reasonable to me

 
butterwings 2008-03-22 07:22:21 PM  
who wouldn't retrieve an errant Oreo? hhhmmmmm. His only mistake was goofing it up!

 
IWood 2008-03-22 07:22:21 PM  
"Who puts gum on a roof?"

-The Tick

 
MonkeyAngst 2008-03-22 07:22:29 PM  
cdn.channel.aol.com
"Leave me out of this!"

 
Super Karate Monkey Death Car 2008-03-22 07:24:56 PM  
That sounds like something I'd actually do. Hell, I'm about to go bake cookies anyway.

 
Snarfangel [TotalFark] 2008-03-22 07:25:00 PM  
media3.washingtonpost.com
/I kid

 
SomeGuyFromColorado 2008-03-22 07:25:24 PM  
Dude should have paid the fine and STFU.

 
saluki1 2008-03-22 07:28:57 PM  
Mmmmmm Oreos and milk... I need to run to the store.

 
BullDogg34F 2008-03-22 07:29:13 PM  
I always deal with this problem by downing the whole glass of milk, problem solved.

 
Trixie Firecracker 2008-03-22 07:30:51 PM  
Hopefully the DSRL will suspend him.

 
Trance750 [TotalFark] 2008-03-22 07:36:01 PM  
Crazymuthafarker: Lawsuit aimed at Nabisco in 3...2...1...


Shhhh. Don't give them any ideas.

 
ohmyvariousgods [TotalFark] 2008-03-22 07:40:45 PM  
I can't count how many times this excuse has let me down.

 
Crocodile 2008-03-22 07:41:11 PM  
Look.

Have any of you tried an oreo lately? They changed the goddam recipe.

Try soaking them in milk, and see what happens. They don't ever get good and soggy like they used to. They continue to hold an unnatural crunch even after an obscenely long dunk.

Go try it, see if I'm lying.
The last time I tried oreos, the experience was so awful that I haven't had an urge for a single oreo since it happened.

Transfat my hairy white ass. PUT THE RECIPE BACK THE WAY IT WAS.

 
Survive1999 2008-03-22 07:41:18 PM  
Oreos and Milk....

"When you are on fire and running down the street people will get out of your way"

 
Sensory Homunculus 2008-03-22 07:45:24 PM  
Sorry to threadjack, but what the hell happened to the China/Tibet thread on the main page?

[/threadjack]

 
blkhwk86 2008-03-22 07:46:01 PM  
Who the hell is eating cookies and milk...while driving????? I don't talk on the phone and this kid is...dunking oreos. That better damn well be special milk and magic cookies because this is one of the most retarded things i've heard of someone doing.

 
ZAZ [TotalFark] 2008-03-22 07:46:39 PM  
There was a case out of North Dakota, IIRC, where the driver blamed his offense on the hot coffee spilled on his lap. I think the court ruled that the coffee was under the driver's control so he was responsible for his instinctive reaction to preserve his genitals.

 
tshetter 2008-03-22 07:47:49 PM  
Everyone knows the key to a good oreo dunk is to dunk slowly.

The cookie must be submerged long enough to absorb the correct amount of milk to become delicious.

Too little and its dry and you need to sip the milk; too moist and it falls apart as you remove it from the dunk.

No one likes broken pieces of cookies in their milk. Unless you fill the glass with cookies and pour milk over it and eat with a spoon.

And thats probably the best way to eat an oreo: in a coffee mug with milk.

I got some double stuft oreos and milk, I might need to get on this.

 
Snarfangel [TotalFark] 2008-03-22 07:48:31 PM  
ZAZ: There was a case out of North Dakota, IIRC, where the driver blamed his offense on the hot coffee spilled on his lap. I think the court ruled that the coffee was under the driver's control so he was responsible for his instinctive reaction to preserve his genitals.

They should have ruled he was too stupid to breed, and more hot water dumped on his genitals.

 
Rant_Casey's_Rabies_Buffet [recently expired TotalFark] 2008-03-22 07:49:07 PM  
www.penguinhosting.net

 
Rant_Casey's_Rabies_Buffet [recently expired TotalFark] 2008-03-22 07:50:12 PM  
tshetter: No one likes broken pieces of cookies in their milk. Unless you fill the glass with cookies and pour milk over it and eat with a spoon.

I used to do this with graham crackers.

 
Pershing123 2008-03-22 07:54:24 PM  
This would not have happened with Hydrox.

 
RL_Fixation 2008-03-22 07:54:24 PM  
Crocodile: Look.

Have any of you tried an oreo lately? They changed the goddam recipe.

Try soaking them in milk, and see what happens. They don't ever get good and soggy like they used to. They continue to hold an unnatural crunch even after an obscenely long dunk.

Go try it, see if I'm lying.
The last time I tried oreos, the experience was so awful that I haven't had an urge for a single oreo since it happened.

Transfat my hairy white ass. PUT THE RECIPE BACK THE WAY IT WAS.


*searches for www.oreofreakout.com*

Damn, that would have been a good one.

 
mordantkitten [TotalFark] 2008-03-22 07:54:49 PM  
Crazymuthafarker: Lawsuit aimed at Nabisco in 3...2...1...

crap, I came in here to say EXACTLY this.

 
wallytacker 2008-03-22 07:56:33 PM  
home.earthlink.net

Oreos were always too mainstream for me.

/I miss Hydrox
//for the slightly chemical taste

 
TeddyRooseveltsMustache [TotalFark] 2008-03-22 07:57:17 PM  
You leave oreos out of this!

 
CornFedIowan 2008-03-22 08:10:14 PM  
Crocodile: Have any of you tried an oreo lately? They changed the goddam recipe.

Try soaking them in milk, and see what happens. They don't ever get good and soggy like they used to. They continue to hold an unnatural crunch even after an obscenely long dunk.


AHA! I'm NOT the only person who noticed the change!

 
Gyrfalcon [TotalFark] 2008-03-22 08:54:48 PM  
I thought the whole point of Oreos/milk was to leisurely enjoy the experience of the dunk & soak. Why would you try to eat Oreos & milk while speeding down the road?

This guy's a double-fail.

 
almejita [TotalFark] 2008-03-22 09:14:03 PM  
Sorry to threadjack, but what the hell happened to the China/Tibet thread on the main page?

Shut up, we're talking about Oreo's

 
tshetter 2008-03-22 09:14:39 PM  
Rant_Casey's_Rabies_Buffet: tshetter: No one likes broken pieces of cookies in their milk. Unless you fill the glass with cookies and pour milk over it and eat with a spoon.

I used to do this with graham crackers.


I love graham crackers and milk.

Also good when you put butter on them.

/did indeed eat double stuft in milk.
//twas the bomb.

 
almejita [TotalFark] 2008-03-22 09:16:28 PM  
I like cheese

 
almejita [TotalFark] 2008-03-22 09:18:31 PM  
Ohhh....I like purple too

 
Juniper Jupiter [recently expired TotalFark] 2008-03-22 09:19:18 PM  
I just came here to post this picture!


And yes, this is a deep fried Oreo!
gloriana.files.wordpress.com

OM NOM NOM NOM!!

 
almejita [TotalFark] 2008-03-22 09:19:24 PM  
I also play WoW, but I don't ride a moped

Go figure

 
IWood 2008-03-22 09:20:26 PM  
Crocodile: Look.

Have any of you tried an oreo lately? They changed the goddam recipe.

Try soaking them in milk, and see what happens. They don't ever get good and soggy like they used to. They continue to hold an unnatural crunch even after an obscenely long dunk.

Go try it, see if I'm lying.
The last time I tried oreos, the experience was so awful that I haven't had an urge for a single oreo since it happened.

Transfat my hairy white ass. PUT THE RECIPE BACK THE WAY IT WAS.


They were much better when they were made with lard.

 
Mega Steve [TotalFark] 2008-03-22 09:21:04 PM  
With the new Oreo cookies, pinch them a little so both sides have a crack in them and they'll soak up milk like any other cookie.

/The best tasting one was always the one I dropped in the cup and got extra soaking time

 
almejita [TotalFark] 2008-03-22 09:21:42 PM  
Sometimes, on weekends when things get really boring


I get bored

Playing WoW later, cuz ATM, am posting on teh FRAK

 
SlowTimedRapid 2008-03-22 09:22:02 PM  
What's next -- a poorly deep-fried Twinkie?

 
almejita [TotalFark] 2008-03-22 09:23:25 PM  
I also like all CAPS

ATM

not always though

 
almejita [TotalFark] 2008-03-22 09:26:23 PM  
a bugs are biting my ass

maybe it's a pimple

yes, I know I'm gonna probably get banned

but I is really bored and our Gruul run isn't 'til later

yes, I did my daily's already

 
almejita [TotalFark] 2008-03-22 09:28:41 PM  
More things to get me in trouble Not a RR (new window)

 
the voices in your head 2008-03-22 09:43:04 PM  
almejita:

Your schizophrenia is showing.

 
Xxplosiv 2008-03-22 09:51:30 PM  
CornFedIowan: Crocodile: Have any of you tried an oreo lately? They changed the goddam recipe.

Try soaking them in milk, and see what happens. They don't ever get good and soggy like they used to. They continue to hold an unnatural crunch even after an obscenely long dunk.

AHA! I'm NOT the only person who noticed the change!


its because your getting fresh cookies now, the stale old ones hold milk the best.

/prove me wrong

 
Deez Nutz 2008-03-23 12:09:49 AM  
This excuse is so insane it must have been true.

 
AuntiAnxiety 2008-03-23 08:30:34 AM  
Was it this guy? Link (new window)

 
bunner [TotalFark] 2008-03-23 12:42:28 PM  
"Z0MG my Or3o is t3h bad dunkzor I have t3h c0okiez in my B3em3R!!11!"

Sell his car and use the money to feed a family that can't afford Oreos.

 
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