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(Canada.com) Followup Rock icon Chad "Don't Call Me Turton" Kroeger of Nickelback suffers setback in DUI case after a BC judge throws out his ridiculous defence argument   (canada.com) divider line 36
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2014 clicks; posted to Music » on 05 Mar 2008 at 9:32 PM   |  Make this a Fark FavoriteFavorite    |   share: Share on OMGTWITTER WEB2.0share on StumbleUponshare on Facebook  more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!

36 Comments   (+0 »)


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klymen [TotalFark] 2008-03-05 09:14:20 PM  
Rock icon?

 
HeadbangerSmurf [TotalFark] 2008-03-05 09:28:30 PM  
As much as we all hate Nickleback, can we honestly say we wouldn't accept his level of fame and the amount of money and ass that have to come with it? I would. In a second.

Don't drink and drive, idiot.

 
Kenthehillwilliam 2008-03-05 09:47:37 PM  
if i was in Nickelback id drive drunk hoping to Die as well

 
EJ25T 2008-03-05 09:51:08 PM  
FTA:

"A Surrey provincial court judge allowed "blowing in the face" evidence in the case against Chad Kroeger..."

gross.

 
monsieurstabby [TotalFark] 2008-03-05 10:01:19 PM  
Fugly retard. If I had a car worth $176K I wouldn't drive drunk.

 
HellblazerPrime 2008-03-05 10:02:37 PM  
eqtworld: That guy is hardcore. This substance abuse related incident with the law shows that his life and music mirror Johnny Cash more and more every day.

In the age of Brittany and boy bands, Nickelback is our generation's gold standard of quality, creativity and originality.


In the immortal words of John Gabriel, I wish I could hate you to death. (new window)

 
NeauxFear [TotalFark] 2008-03-05 10:05:19 PM  
In the headline, I assumed BC = British Columbia. My assumption was confirmed when I saw this line FTFA: Prosecutor Michelle Wray said the judge's decision on the "blowing in the face"' evidence is precedent setting and could be grounds for an appeal if Turton is convicted.

Seriously, in the States the prosecutor is ready to throw you under the jail. Most prosecutors here feel that if you were innocent, you wouldn't have been arrested in the first place. Which makes their job pretty easy, I guess.

 
Nemo's Brother 2008-03-05 10:08:32 PM  
I heard these guys got in a fight with Nickelback www.myspace.com/orificedeath

 
fuzzwell [TotalFark] 2008-03-05 10:08:38 PM  
defense?

 
Bill_Wick's_Friend 2008-03-05 10:13:24 PM  
monsieurstabby: Fugly retard. If I had a car worth $176K I wouldn't drive drunk.

That....and I wouldn't drive it in Surrey.

Ewww. Trashy.

 
Mr. Slippyfist 2008-03-05 10:18:59 PM  
HeadbangerSmurf: As much as we all hate Nickleback, can we honestly say we wouldn't accept his level of fame and the amount of money and ass that have to come with it? I would. In a second.


No deal if I have to have the same hair-do.

 
carmody 2008-03-05 10:19:44 PM  
Maybe this experience will inspire him to re-rewrite that one song again.

 
2and4 2008-03-05 10:39:20 PM  
He couldn't come up with a better stage name than 'Kroeger'?

 
Take Five 2008-03-05 10:50:03 PM  
I came here to post the words rock icon followed by a question mark, but happily saw that the Boobies took care of that.

 
NeauxFear [TotalFark] 2008-03-05 10:53:09 PM  
2and4: He couldn't come up with a better stage name than 'Kroeger'?

Also, this. I have to wonder if it's a pseudo-Gothic character name for D&D. Kroeger Orcsbane, Destroyer of Hymens, Defender of Hesselbaum, Lord of the Realm.

 
Bhasayate [TotalFark] 2008-03-05 11:09:56 PM  
Nickleback is one of the worst bands ever. I can't stand any of their songs.

 
bingethinker [TotalFark] 2008-03-05 11:16:05 PM  
Eww. Danger pay for the cop who got close enough to this douche to smell his breath.

 
RaKellaKAT 2008-03-05 11:33:37 PM  
Someone once reached my (amateurish, pissant) blog by searching for "Chad Kroeger without his shirt on". Someone out there fails at Google, life, and knowing what is and is not attractive.

/could be said of Chad Kroeger as well, if we just assume that he sucks at Google.

 
weiner dog 2008-03-05 11:41:11 PM  
Turton adopted his half-brother's last name long before he was even a fixture around Vancouver. There used to be a 3rd Kroeger in the band, too. It's not a made-up "rock name" like Nikki Sixx or what-have-you.

Not a defence, just an explanation.

What's funny is that Chad lives in Abbotsford, on purpose.

 
NeauxFear [TotalFark] 2008-03-05 11:46:51 PM  
weiner dog: Turton adopted his half-brother's last name long before he was even a fixture around Vancouver. There used to be a 3rd Kroeger in the band, too. It's not a made-up "rock name" like Nikki Sixx or what-have-you.

Not a defence, just an explanation.

What's funny is that Chad lives in Abbotsford, on purpose.


Yeah, but what's sad is that you know this. ;)

 
Martstar 2008-03-06 12:05:00 AM  
HeadbangerSmurf: As much as we all hate Nickleback, can we honestly say we wouldn't accept his level of fame and the amount of money and ass that have to come with it? I would. In a second.


Well, since it would mean waking up every day and singing and playing Nickelback songs, I think I'd actually take a pass on that. There are some things money just can't buy.

 
weiner dog 2008-03-06 12:28:37 AM  
NeauxFear: weiner dog: Turton adopted his half-brother's last name long before he was even a fixture around Vancouver. There used to be a 3rd Kroeger in the band, too. It's not a made-up "rock name" like Nikki Sixx or what-have-you.

Not a defence, just an explanation.

What's funny is that Chad lives in Abbotsford, on purpose.

Yeah, but what's sad is that you know this. ;)


I live in the area (not Abby) and listened to Canadian modern rock radio in my teens. It's only been about 10-12 years since, and, due to their success in the States (and subsequently, worldwide), I've not been fully able to expunge the knowledge. They need to disappear completely before this will be possible, unfortunately.

:)

 
Bill_Wick's_Friend 2008-03-06 12:34:26 AM  
What's funny is that Chad lives in Abbotsford, on purpose.

Maybe he's really into church?

Or meth?

Or the smell of manure?

(honestly...i can't think of anything else that Abbotsford offers)

 
Stradavus 2008-03-06 12:38:58 AM  
As much as I hate this dude's music, I think it's bullshiat that they ruled the evidence unconstitutional but still accepted it.

 
rrahrrahrrah [TotalFark] 2008-03-06 06:17:08 AM  
Bhasayate: Nickleback is one of the worst bands ever. I can't stand any of their songs.

There, FTFY.

oh and eqtworld, +1, would read again.

 
kpottruff 2008-03-06 06:17:48 AM  
better headline (rage) etc.

sad panda here.

Mine made mention of the fact he tried to give his VISA card as ID for gods sake.

/grabs beer sobs moves on.

 
PYROY 2008-03-06 10:22:41 AM  
NeauxFear: Destroyer of Hymens

Ah, my old high school title.

 
skotsour 2008-03-06 12:39:52 PM  
eqtworld: That guy is hardcore. This substance abuse related incident with the law shows that his life and music mirror Johnny Cash more and more every day.

In the age of Brittany and boy bands, Nickelback is our generation's gold standard of quality, creativity and originality.


Don't you DARE compare that douchebag to Johnny.

 
bottsicus 2008-03-06 02:14:55 PM  
Chad Kroeger and his band are the definition of suck.

That is all.

 
lacydog 2008-03-06 02:16:09 PM  
skotsour: eqtworld: That guy is hardcore. This substance abuse related incident with the law shows that his life and music mirror Johnny Cash more and more every day.

In the age of Brittany and boy bands, Nickelback is our generation's gold standard of quality, creativity and originality.

Don't you DARE compare that douchebag to Johnny.


Successful troll is succesful.

Also, Nickleback sucks.

/the most original of comments, I know

 
mynameismark 2008-03-06 04:24:38 PM  
eqtworld: Nickelback is our generation's gold standard of quality, creativity and originality.

holy. farking. christ. you didn't just say that for real, did you?

/hint: there is also music you don't hear on the radio

 
hockeyfarker [TotalFark] 2008-03-06 05:31:43 PM  
eqtworld: That guy is hardcore. This substance abuse related incident with the law shows that his life and music mirror Johnny Cash more and more every day.

In the age of Brittany and boy bands, Nickelback is our generation's gold standard of quality, creativity and originality.


Preach it, brother. Amen. Suck it, haterz

 
mynameismark 2008-03-06 06:59:42 PM  
thats funny. the word suck used in a thread about nickelback...and not referring to nickelback!

/generic, pop-metal, top 40 garbage

 
WrongTrousers 2008-03-07 12:45:47 AM  
Bill_Wick's_Friend: What's funny is that Chad lives in Abbotsford, on purpose.

Maybe he's really into church?

Or meth?

Or the smell of manure?

(honestly...i can't think of anything else that Abbotsford offers)


How about all three?

 
BabaG 2008-03-10 01:42:42 AM  
bottsicus
Chad Kroeger and his band are the definition of suck.


THIS.

 
kling_klang_bed 2008-03-11 02:13:30 PM  
WrongTrousers: Bill_Wick's_Friend: What's funny is that Chad lives in Abbotsford, on purpose.

Maybe he's really into church?

Or meth?

Or the smell of manure?

(honestly...i can't think of anything else that Abbotsford offers)


He lives there because it offers a safe pocket of bland and suck. Like if he lived where there was anything cool and exciting, it'd show right away in Nickelback's music (I'd presume), and that would tear them apart. Not sucking would be anathema to the very idea of Nickelback: music convalescence. They would literally turn into dust the moment they stop sucking.

 
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