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(News.com.au) Interesting Australia opens world's first "human rights compliant" prison including cottages, flat screen TVs and mountain views. It's not a life sentence, it's a lifestyle   (canberra.yourguide.com.au) divider line 107
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Bob Down 2008-03-02 07:40:55 AM  
Anyone will tell you it’s a prisoner island, hidden in the summer for a million years.

 
ZAZ [TotalFark] 2008-03-02 08:32:06 AM  
You're lucky I'm at home with my collection of Icehouse CDs, Bob Down, or I'd have to curse you for getting that song stuck in my head all day.

 
UNC_Samurai [TotalFark] 2008-03-02 09:07:00 AM  
lounge rooms complete with flat-screen LCD televisions

They fail to mention Chopper Reed's on every channel.

 
Snarfangel [TotalFark] 2008-03-02 09:21:09 AM  
C'mon, they are in the Southern Hemisphere. The least they can do is have an Antarctic penal colony.

 
Tatsuma [TotalFark] 2008-03-02 09:30:30 AM  
What about the human rights of the people who were killed, raped, maimed, tortured, and everything you can think of?

Fail, Australia, fail.

 
dahmers love zombie [TotalFark] 2008-03-02 10:01:18 AM  
Snarfangel: C'mon, they are in the Southern Hemisphere. The least they can do is have an Antarctic penal colony.

Yeah, but it'd be a really, really small one.

 
madmann [TotalFark] 2008-03-02 11:20:01 AM  
I AM NOT A NUMBER!

I AM A FREE MAN!

[cue Iron Maiden]

 
Dubya's_Coke_Dealer 2008-03-02 11:59:50 AM  
Tatsuma: What about the human rights of the people who were killed, raped, maimed, tortured, and everything you can think of?

Fail, Australia, fail.


You're right. These people should be tortured to the brink of death every day, and kept alive by whatever means necessary to torture them more.

 
skinink 2008-03-02 12:00:50 PM  
You know you prison is classy when the men's bathroom has a condom dispenser.

 
Crow The Robot 2008-03-02 12:01:26 PM  
Awesome Australia...because flat screen tv's, cottages, bbq, and mountain views have everything to do with human rights.

 
HagarTheHorrible [TotalFark] 2008-03-02 12:01:35 PM  
Prison?? That article simply described the ultimate Socialist paradise.

 
Snarfangel [TotalFark] 2008-03-02 12:01:44 PM  
Dubya's_Coke_Dealer: You're right. These people should be tortured to the brink of death every day, and kept alive by whatever means necessary to torture them more.

Your ideas are intriguing. What kind of cost are we looking at?

 
Wolfmanjames [TotalFark] 2008-03-02 12:03:22 PM  
When Austrailia was a penal colony, the end of the line was Norfolk Island. Conditions were so atrocious and brutal under the regime there that prisoners would have a lottery amongst themselves. There would be two 'winners.' The first 'winner' was obligated to murder the second winner in front of the rest of the lottery participants. That way the survivors would be taken to the mainland as witnesses in the murder trial and enjoy the improved conditions and respite from the brutality of Norfolk Island.

Bring back the good old days.

 
Admiral_Halsey 2008-03-02 12:03:29 PM  
Dubya's_Coke_Dealer: Tatsuma: What about the human rights of the people who were killed, raped, maimed, tortured, and everything you can think of?

Fail, Australia, fail.

You're right. These people should be tortured to the brink of death every day, and kept alive by whatever means necessary to torture them more.


You know, you have a sick mind. Seriously, I think you need help.

 
Oranda 2008-03-02 12:06:46 PM  
If there are people that understand what it is like to be a prisoner, it is the Australians!

zing!

 
Jose628 2008-03-02 12:07:20 PM  
Their slogan:


DON'T DROP THE SOAP OR ELSE...

farm2.static.flickr.com

YOU GONNA GET RAPED!

 
thedarkshadow 2008-03-02 12:08:08 PM  
I guess they skipped the chapter on crime and punishment.

 
dwalder 2008-03-02 12:08:42 PM  
But TFA doesn't mention: NO BEER!

Link (new window)

 
moothemagiccow 2008-03-02 12:09:06 PM  
Dubya's_Coke_Dealer:

You're right. These people should be tortured to the brink of death every day, and kept alive by whatever means necessary to torture them more.


No. It's supposed to be a correctional facility. They're supposed to suffer the consequences of their actions and learn how to function in an actual society, learn a skill that will get them a job and keep them away from crime, etc etc.

 
moothemagiccow 2008-03-02 12:09:41 PM  
ps that was a pretty effing weak strawman, dcd

 
FilmBELOH20 [TotalFark] 2008-03-02 12:11:18 PM  
Dubya's_Coke_Dealer: Tatsuma: What about the human rights of the people who were killed, raped, maimed, tortured, and everything you can think of?

Fail, Australia, fail.

You're right. These people should be tortured to the brink of death every day, and kept alive by whatever means necessary to torture them more.


Don't be a dipshiat. Of course they should not be totured, but they should not live a life of any luxuries whatsoever. They have given up every those rights by committing the crimes they committed.

They should be the ones providing services to the community like garbage collection, road work, etc. The should be required to pay back society, by replacing those jobs that society has to pay for with taxes. Then they should be locked back up in their rooms at night so they get a good night's rest before they do it all over again in the morning. Treating prisoners like anything other than, well, prisoners, is idiocy at best.

I'm going to go out on a limb and guess that you've never been the victim of a crime.

 
BobtheFascist 2008-03-02 12:12:51 PM  
moothemagiccow - Dubya's_Coke_Dealer:

You're right. These people should be tortured to the brink of death every day, and kept alive by whatever means necessary to torture them more.

No. It's supposed to be a correctional facility. They're supposed to suffer the consequences of their actions and learn how to function in an actual society, learn a skill that will get them a job and keep them away from crime, etc etc.


Say. You might want to get your sarcasm meter calibrated.

 
Jose628 2008-03-02 12:15:17 PM  
This thing is interesting as an experience. Let's wait and see how many of these folks come back to commit crimes after they're released.

If the ratio is better than the current one, I say let it be, let's change all prisons to this model.

Throwing people in godforsaken dungeons may seem like a nice "revenge" act, but it doesn't do much as far as rehabilitation goes.

 
moeriscus 2008-03-02 12:15:23 PM  
FTFA:

"the ACT Government anticipates it will cost taxpayers $336 a day for each inmate"

Holy shiat. I cannot think of a more absurd miscarriage of justice than this. There is nothing "humane" about pampering those who should be punished.

Also, I second Tatsuma's comment...

However, I do wonder what sort of prisoners will be sheltered there. Are we talking about violent criminals, or minor offenses?

/disgusted

 
2kEwL4U 2008-03-02 12:17:12 PM  
Tatsuma: What about the human rights of the people who were killed, raped, maimed, tortured, and everything you can think of?

Fail, Australia Israel, fail.


FTFY

 
altinos 2008-03-02 12:19:51 PM  
Didn't you know? In Australia, the criminals aren't at fault, it is society's fault. Therefore, the criminals must live a life of luxury while society suffers for their crimes.

:)

 
altinos 2008-03-02 12:20:52 PM  
Fail, Australia Israel, fail.

Collective punishment FTW!

 
Espertron 2008-03-02 12:21:14 PM  
moothemagiccow: No. It's supposed to be a correctional facility. They're supposed to suffer the consequences of their actions and learn how to function in an actual society, learn a skill that will get them a job and keep them away from crime, etc etc.

Aw man! I'm a law abiding, tax paying citizen and I don't get mountain views or a flat screen TV.

Now I'm encouraged to break the law to get in on those swank accomidations... at the taxpayer's expense.

Righteous!

 
Captain Darling 2008-03-02 12:21:16 PM  
If punishment is really nothing more creditable than vengeance, as we are often told by opponents of the death penalty, then it stands to reason than prisons should be as comfortable as possible.

 
Fapinator 2008-03-02 12:22:27 PM  
Okay, I'm curious ...

Is this prison actually for murderers, rapists, torturers, etc.?

Is it for non-violent offenders?

Is it for criminals who committed victimless crimes (prostitution is one example I can think of)?

Yeah, I agree that prisoners shouldn't have the luxuries that are apparently available at this prison, but to me it does make a difference just what kind of crimes the prisoners committed.

 
AmazingRuss 2008-03-02 12:24:32 PM  
Tatsuma: What about the human rights of the people who were killed, raped, maimed, tortured, and everything you can think of?

Fail, Australia, fail.


Torturing the perps will help the victims...how?

If somebody rapes murders, maims, or tortures, they're irrecoverable, and they should be euthanized so they can't do it again. People that look salvageable and will be let back out should not be turned into even worse monsters before you let them back out.

I know it doesn't satisfy the need for biblical vengeance...but then, nothing much does. Ask the people in the middle east.

Unless you're into the whole sadomasochistic victim/avenger thing...in which case, you might look int euthanasia for yourself. Most of us can do without that kind of sickness.

 
Espertron 2008-03-02 12:27:40 PM  
Austraila! You're doing it all wrong!

You'd figure a former prison colony like Australia would have better success at soul crushing incarcerations.

USA! USA!

Where 1 out of every 100 people (1% population) is in prison.

/makes me wonder how many farkers have been behind bars at one point or another in their lives.

 
Siamese Bream [TotalFark] 2008-03-02 12:29:00 PM  
I've been in front of a few bars in my time...

 
altinos 2008-03-02 12:30:03 PM  
Where 1 out of every 100 people (1% population) is in prison.

1 out of 100 adults.

 
Espertron 2008-03-02 12:31:53 PM  
altinos: Where 1 out of every 100 people (1% population) is in prison.

1 out of 100 adults.


My bad. You're correct, of course. Thanks for the correction.

 
YouPeopleAreCrazy 2008-03-02 12:32:06 PM  
moeriscus: "the ACT Government anticipates it will cost taxpayers $336 a day for each inmate"

$10,000 mer month. 100% of my income would fall short of paying for one person in this facility.

Insane.

How many guys will reoffend, just to get back in? Especially when 'in' is nicer than 'out.

My thoughts on prison? I should never, ever see another pothole in the road. I have to work for a living, why not them?

/flatscreen TV? *I* don't have one.
//someone explain to me why *I* should pay for these clowns to have one.

 
oh_noes111 2008-03-02 12:32:23 PM  
That's it.

I'm emigrating to Australia to become a Muslim rapist.

 
Jose628 2008-03-02 12:32:41 PM  
altinos: Where 1 out of every 100 people (1% population) is in prison.

1 out of 100 adults.


Damn kids, getting away with their crimes.

 
Crazy Cat Lady 2008-03-02 12:33:44 PM  
1. Commit crime
2. Go to cushy, luxurious Australian prison
3. Complete sentence, get tossed back on the mean streets
4. ...

I know what I'd do.

 
Espertron 2008-03-02 12:33:48 PM  
www.billp.comcontextrules.typepad.com

 
Siamese Bream [TotalFark] 2008-03-02 12:34:03 PM  
oh_noes111

I'm emigrating to Australia to become a Muslim rapist.

Does that mean you're going to rape Muslims, or you're a Muslim and you're going to rape at random? It's an important distinction.

 
charlesmartel11235 2008-03-02 12:34:15 PM  
a gilded cage is still a cage

 
TxRabbit 2008-03-02 12:35:40 PM  
I see they don't mention that they are forced to listen to Inya and Celine Dion while in the scented bubble bath by candlelight.

 
scalpod 2008-03-02 12:46:14 PM  
Do the cottages come with Botany Bay windows?

 
Molavian 2008-03-02 12:46:55 PM  
We need to develop deep space travel, and quick. I need to get off this rock. It's turning into some queer bizzaro version of the universe.

 
tonesskin [TotalFark] 2008-03-02 12:48:13 PM  
YouPeopleAreCrazy: //someone explain to me why *I* should pay for these clowns to have one.

Because it gives you something to biatch about, thus allowing us to laugh at said biatching.

 
mongbiohazard 2008-03-02 12:50:41 PM  
Malbar: Dubya's_Coke_Dealer: Tatsuma: What about the human rights of the people who were killed, raped, maimed, tortured, and everything you can think of?

Fail, Australia, fail.

You're right. These people should be tortured to the brink of death every day, and kept alive by whatever means necessary to torture them more.

Because that's exactly what he said, right? There is no middle ground between excessive luxury comforts and TORTURE. You choose one or the other because these are the only options that exist!

Moron.



Exactly... You beat me to it.
Dubya's_Coke_Dealer = FAIL.

 
lelio 2008-03-02 12:50:55 PM  
"You are detained, you lose your liberty, you lose basic things that we take for granted, when you can go out, what sort of clothes you can wear and what sort of food you eat.

Sort of like working at McDonald's.

 
DontMakeMeComeBackThere 2008-03-02 12:52:53 PM  
charlesmartel11235: a gilded cage is still a cage

Naive is still naive.

It all depends on who they put in there - as described it is a much better life than some criminals have on the outside. I'm willing to bet that for some people, being locked-in at night and having to wear prison issue clothes is a small price to pay for say, knowing where your next meal is coming from, and having a bed to sleep in at night.

 
chocoboat 2008-03-02 12:54:07 PM  
$122,000 per year being spent on these criminals. LCD TVs... mountain views... who in the hell allowed this to happen?

I wonder how much per year is spent on people who DON'T break the law?

charlesmartel: Sure, a gilded cage is still a cage. It's not fun to give up your freedom in order to live in a nice place.

So what's the alternative for these people? Work all day at a crap job for little money, and live in a dump. That kind of freedom isn't worth a whole lot.

Now I don't think people will going around committing crimes with the intention of getting caught. But when the punishment is only a minor decrease in your quality of life, and is in some ways better, a lot of people will say "what the hell, I'll go ahead and rob that house" since the punishment isn't something to be feared.

 
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