Take shiat Away?

quickdraw: Take shiat Away?

bam, right in the Boobies. Oh and thanks for your shameless cheerleading. :)

What else....

Thieves Stealing at Airport?

madmann: Thieves Stealing at Airport?

well if you can't get rid of the thieves, I guess it's better to hire them as security staffers. Hey, at least they already know how airport security works, right?

madmann: bam, right in the Boobies.

Ouch! :P

Oh and thanks for your shameless cheerleading. :)

No prob - I'm pimpin that vid all over town. Its awesome.

When I travel everything valuable goes in the carry-on. No way do I want some loser rifling through my luggage and seeing my sunglasses, camera, etc... ripe for the taking.

Weaver95: madmann: Thieves Stealing at Airport?

well if you can't get rid of the thieves, I guess it's better to hire them as security staffers. Hey, at least they already know how airport security works, right?

Also a good career move if you groping people as a hobby.

Mrs. Madmann would like to contribute the standard TSA response to complaints of lost items, "Tough shiat, Asshole".

They Steal Anything

Thousands Standing Around

Too Stupid Assholes.

The Sheep Asplode

They Stop Airplanes.

The headline. Fix it.

Giving Mcjob fools this much responsibility was BRILLIANT hillary. Thank you

And now they let someone steal a "t" from the headline!

From TFA:
A former KCI baggage handler, who asked us not to identify her, said she knows theft happens even in Kansas City.

So she wouldn't be surprised if it happened in any other city, but not in Kansas? That seems a little naive to me.

OccamsWhiskers: And now they let someone steal a "t" from the headline!

Brilliant!

OnlyM3: Giving Mcjob fools this much responsibility was BRILLIANT hillary. Thank you

I dislike Hillary, but I don't think that the powers of the TSA could be solely attributed to her.

Can it?

YixilTesiphon: Thousands Standing Around

More like "Thieves Standing Around"...

Stolen watch? Not how I travel.

...oh wait, that's not what you said.

Tiny Scrotum-ed Assholes?

I've re-read the headline 5 times now and I just can't parse it... help?

Thieves Stealing Always.

/I feel safer now that they have taken away my shoes and hair gel.

That depends on what the definition of is is.

TSA: Making the country a safer place by stealing your belongings and cavity searching Grandma.

Crid: So she wouldn't be surprised if it happened in any other city, but not in Kansas? That seems a little naive to me.

No, she's surprised that any other city exists. People get on planes and disappear into and reappear from the ether.

/KCI is in Missouri.

Am I the only one who sees TSA and thinks "Temporal Security Annex"? I played way too much Journeyman Project in the pre-9/11 era...

The TSA has allowed $31,000,000 worth of travelers stuff to be stolen under is 'watch'. What does TSA stand for again


Dor't fael bdd suppy,eye cah't spall eigher.

Olny srmat poelpe can raed this. I cdnuolt blveiee that I clu od aulaclty uesdnatnrd what I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in what oredr the ltteers in a word are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is that the first and last ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can still raed it wouthit a porbelm. This is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the word as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! If you can raed this psas it on!

The Sacrilege Agency

That's the best i came up with, but it's personal. I hate them more than just about anyone.

They Suck Ass

Those bastards inspected my luggage, didn't leave a note, screwed up my carefully packed clothes, and put my luggage lock back on broken and locked into an impossible position. Thank goodness I have really strong hands. If I hadn't gotten that lock off I would have been totally screwed.

To Steal All

Is TSA just an abbreviation for "Tatsuma"?

Have y'all noticed this recently?

My local airport is a small regional airport. 1 security check point with 1 metal detector. Recently, tsa has set up aditional screening checkpoints right at the individual gate doors. Before you can board the plane, you must surrender your shoes again. 50 feet max between tsa security checkpoint and gate door. 1 way into the gate area, and 1 way out. Only a Coke vending machine, no other amenities. 20oz sodas. Now we are not even allowed to take sodas on to the plane purchased on the "sterile side" of security. Tsa re-checks your shoes, carry on, purse. They even go as far as making people remove most of their outer clothing. All this is done as boarding is announced for a flight, at the boarding gate.

Tuxedo Swordfish Apples

As if the hassle waiting for bags at the end wasn't enough, yet another reason for carry-on only.

/happily walks straight from plane to parking lot

//Still no idea where my brand new sleeping bag disappeared to on 2004 trip

NannyStatePark: Those bastards inspected my luggage, didn't leave a note, screwed up my carefully packed clothes, and put my luggage lock back on broken and locked into an impossible position. Thank goodness I have really strong hands. If I hadn't gotten that lock off I would have been totally screwed.

Please tell us more about your strong hands.

JohDHJ: OnlyM3: Giving Mcjob fools this much responsibility was BRILLIANT hillary. Thank you

I dislike Hillary, but I don't think that the powers of the TSA could be solely attributed to her.

Can it?

Sure it can be attributed to her! It just was. That was the point. Let's try another example.

I'm a fat slob who got fired from Blockbuster for stealing plastic CD cases. THANKS A LOT HILLARY*.

* "HITLERY" or "BARACK HUSSEIN OSAMA" work too.

studebaker hoch: Is TSA just an abbreviation for "Tatsuma"?

It would be if he were an airport, maybe.

I wonder if it would really be any different if private contractors were still doing the job as opposed to TSA?

Also, I wonder how this compares to foreign security (like the security in the UK, or... well, anywhere else) in regards to luggage theft.

And I wonder how much of the luggage that's been stolen is by airline employees who are tired of hearing people biatch about their shiat every day?

According to the article, a lot of stuff gets stolen after it's been screened and before it gets loaded onto the plane. Gee, I wonder who possibly could have done that?! Now, I'm not so naive as to say that no screener has ever stolen anything, but I have a feeling that the numbers are at least somewhat misleading and that TSA isn't responsible for ALL of it. Now, if TSA were loading the bags onto the planes as well, then I would totally agree with it. I say anyone caught stealing luggage should face federal charges and go away to prison for as long as possible. There's no excuse to stealing somebody else's stuff, they don't deserve it, period.

/TSA employee
//Never stolen anything

Thieving Soulless Asshats

Terminally Shiatfaced Assistants.

At inception, TSA stood for "Taking Scissors Away", now I'll agree with outatime.

Fluffy_the_cactus: /TSA employee
//Never stolen anything

You didn't have to steal anything, you just pointed the good shiat out and collected your cut later.


JOKING!!!!

Fluffy_the_cactus: I wonder if it would really be any different if private contractors were still doing the job as opposed to TSA?

By April 2005, the agency's incompetence was so glaring that not one but two federal reports documented it. Both the GAO and the DHS found that screening was no more effective than before 9/11.

Hope that answers your question.

31 million? Seems low to me. Does that include the billions of free lighters?

The Soulless Army

JimBob1015: I've re-read the headline 5 times now and I just can't parse it... help?

change is to its and it makes a lot more sense.

AfroX: That depends on what the definition of is is.

I came in here to say this! Well played, sir.

OUTSIDE I LIVE IN MY MOTHER'S BASEMENT
OUTSIDE I SEND BILLS TO FOLKS WHO WON'T PAY
OUTSIDE I GET STRAIGHT F'S - OUTSIDE I SELL USED CARS
OUTSIDE I WORK FOR THE T.S.A.

OUTSIDE I'M UNEMPLOYED CAUSE I CAN'T GET UP EARLY
OUTSIDE I SHRED THE RECORDS THAT HUMAN RESOURCE TOSSES
OUTSIDE I ANSWER PHONES AND SCREEN MY BOSSES PHONECALLS
OUTSIDE I MAKE PHONECALLS TO OTHER PEOPLE'S BOSSES

BUT HERE, I WALK THROUGH FIELDS OF FLOWERS
HERE IF I FIGHT, I MIGHT JUST WIN
HERE, WHEN I LOG IN, I'M NOT JUST A COG IN A WHEEL,
I'M MORE REAL
AND THE SADNESS I FEEL
GOES AWAY
WHILE I PLAY
NO MATTER HOW MUCH I PAY - WHAT'S FIFTY DOLLARS ANYWAY?

OUTSIDE I'M LONELY, OUTSIDE I FEEL UGLY
FAT AND LAZY, SAD AND CRAZY
BUT HERE I'M THE PERSON I WISHED I COULD BE
IT'S JUST LIKE THE ADS SAY, BUT NOT IN A BAD WAY

YOU CAN BE A HERO HERE FOR JUST A SMALL FEE

FIFTY DOLLARS A MONTH CAN TAKE YOU SO FAR
YOU CAN BE A HERO HERE NO MATTER WHAT YOU REALLY ARE.


From a song my wife wrote about a person addicted to an online MMO... but it applies.

Toothpaste, Soda, Aftershave? (Apparently the three things they're most worried about us taking through the checkpoint.)