Oh come on, Alan's Psychedelic Breakfast is awesome. When they make that sizzling bacon sound, I always want bacon.

Most of Meatloaf's hits are just way too damn long.

Stairway does go on a bit longer then needed, but it's a great song. And ANY song by Celine Dion is too long.

He referred to "American Pie" as "The Day the Music Died".

He probably thinks "Crazy Train" is called "Going off the Rails".

i would have been disappointed if Tarkus wasn't on there. I played it the other night on the jukebox when i was playing darts, and everyone was like 'what the hell is this' pretty much the whole time. one guy asked if i actively tried to find the longest song on there.

i think i need to make a playlist of insanely long songs and play them one night out. i'll spend five bucks and have 4 hours of all my music.

i don't think i'll have any friends after that though

Gordon Lightfoot, Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald

Matthew Swanson go eff yourself.

Anyone who thinks American Pie is called The Day Music Died is in no place to judge music.

He missed CCR's version of Heard it Through the Grapevine. Should have been number one.

Also, Styx's Come Sail Away, Frampton's Do You Feel Like I Do (though I have to listen to the whole damn thing every time it comes on anyway) should have been on the list.

And it's good he's only listing classic rock--there are a lot of contemporary artists who don't know when to end a song. I'm looking at you, Sam Beam, with your extended "ooooooooh...oooooooooh...ooooooooh" songs. Polyphonic Spree had one long-ass song on the end of its first album that was nothing more than fricking chirping and warbling.

Sigur Ros, Godspeed You Black Emperor and the ilk also need to learn to trim down. Don't get me wrong, I dig a good long song, but when it's dirgy-slow with long periods of near silence, it's not art, it's anaesthetic.

3. Pink Floyd, Alan's Psychedelic Breakfast: Rise and Shine/Sunny (1970)
Running Time: 13:01
What was the band thinking when they made this "song?" It's literally a guy making breakfast. It opens with him saying, "sausages . . . coffee . . . marmalade. I like marmalade."

Don't disrespect Pink Floyd. GGgggrrrrrr.

He obviously hasn't heard the song "Several small species of furry animals gathered in a cave and grooving with a pic".

Strange lyrics FTW!:

Aye, an' a bit of mackerel, settler rack and down
Ran it down by the home, and I flew
Well, I slapped me and I flopped it down in the shade
And I cried, cried, cried.

The fear a fallen down had taken, never back the raise
And then cried Mary, an' took out wi' your Claymore,
Right outta a' pocket, I ran down, down the mountainside
Back on Battlin the fiery horde that was falling around the feet.

Never! He cried, never shall ye get me alive
Ye rotten hound of the burnie crew!
Well, I snatched fer the blade an' a Claymore cut and thrust,
And I fell doon before him round his feet. Aye!

A roar he cried!
Frae the bottom of his heart
That I would nay fall but as dead,
Dead as I can by a' feet, d'ya ken?

And the wind cried Mary.


A hidden message (at half normal speed) is at 4:32-4:33. In the right speaker you can hear David saying: "This is pretty avant garde, isn't it?" If you play it at double speed, you can hear Roger saying: "Bring back my guitar"

7-8-9-10, they are all just fine and their length.

Fark off, Scienceman123, 4'33" is exactly as long as it should be, not a second too long of too short.

Perfect!

Dead for Tax Reasons- i would have been disappointed if Tarkus wasn't on there. I played it the other night on the jukebox when i was playing darts, and everyone was like 'what the hell is this' pretty much the whole time. one guy asked if i actively tried to find the longest song on there.

The first thing I thought of when I saw this link was, "Tarkus had better be on there." Most of the time I get the same reaction as you when I play it in public.

/loves ELP

These days we can skip around pretty fast with the laser technology, but imagine if you wanted to play a part you liked for someone on your record player, and you just had to keep guestimating, and dropping the needle at various places, probably even flipping the record over a couple times since both sides had the same title. That would have been exhausting, much like Ian Anderson's 14th flute solo on "Thick as a Brick," part one or two, take your pick.

Yeah, sorry there "Mr. Critic", but in those old days people tended to listen to albums, not singles.

Singles were purchased separately.

/However, Fantômas's Delirium Cordia is a little long.

Making fun of Charlie Daniels, The Allman Brothers and Don McLean is downright Un-American. He almost makes up for it by putting Jethro Tull at #1. Almost...

awfulperson: And it's good he's only listing classic rock--there are a lot of contemporary artists who don't know when to end a song. I'm looking at you, Sam Beam, with your extended "ooooooooh...oooooooooh...ooooooooh" songs.

I can think of a couple of Mars Volta songs that need to be on this list.

Judging from some of the things on that list, I half expected to see "Stairway to Heaven" listed as number one.

What the hell is it with the greenlighting of lists these days? Most of them just makes me want to tell people to get of my lawn and go back to their Fergie-records.

A couple I'd add:

Hey Jude by The Beatles
Master of Puppets by Metallica

/Yes, I know Metallica isn't classic rock. But it's well known.

muck4doo: A couple I'd add:

Hey Jude by The Beatles
Master of Puppets by Metallica

/Yes, I know Metallica isn't classic rock. But it's well known.

This!

Also, Sympathy for the Devil. whoo whoo repeated about 1000 times.

FTFA: 3. Pink Floyd, Alan's Psychedelic Breakfast: Rise and Shine/Sunny (1970)
Running Time: 13:01
What was the band thinking when they made this "song?"

Im going to go out on a limb and say they were high.

This writer has very trendy taste in music. He probably followed the dead back in the day.

I'm sorry, but any organization that makes a living reporting celebrity bullshiat has no business judging music.

/I'm looking at you, VH1
//and you, MTV
///and you, Rolling Stone
////and... oh fark it

Emperor Joseph II: My dear young man, don't take it too hard. Your work is ingenious. It's quality work. And there are simply too many notes, that's all. Just cut a few and it will be perfect.

Mozart: Which few did you have in mind, Majesty?

Guns N Roses "November Rain"
A person can drown by the time that song ends.


/disagree with Devil went down to Georgia being on this list

I think The English Patient was about 95 minutes longer than it needed to be.

Anything by Golden Earring should be on this list. Every time I have to hear Radar Love on the radio(I have no control over what station it is on) at work, I have to suppress the urge to get all glassy-eyed and stabby. That song is f***ing annoying.

There's a track on the Liars first album that just has a loop play over and over at the end... it sucks.

If it weren't for songs like these radio air personalities would never be able to use the can. Back in the days when all the music was on tape cartridges we called these songs "crapper carts" and alway kept a few close at hand for bathroom or other breaks.

Kurpal: FREEBIRD

THIS

klymen: Anyone who thinks American Pie is called The Day Music Died is in no place to judge music.

I hate that song no matter what anybody calls it... Seems to be fixed on the page now anyway.

awfulperson:
Sigur Ros, Godspeed You Black Emperor and the ilk also need to learn to trim down. Don't get me wrong, I dig a good long song, but when it's dirgy-slow with long periods of near silence, it's not art, it's anaesthetic.

True, but it is kind of hard to judge them in the same way as more mainstream music. I could certainly find a few places to trim Godspeed songs though...

/still awesome music

Grand Funk Railroad - Closer to Home. That song makes me want to do violent things to inanimate objects. Nearly 10 minutes, over half of it with dude singing, "I'm getting closer to my hooooooooome" over and over. Just when you think he's getting closer to the end, he kicks it up a notch for another 3 minutes of the same crap. Gah!

Devil Went Down to Georgia? wtf? There are plenty of songs under 4 minutes that sould be shortened but this isn't one of them.

I was glad not to see GY!BE on there though. BBFIII is the only one that annoys me a bit and that's b/c of the person ranting not the music. So I must disagree with you awfulperson.

Red Sparowes' song Finally As That Blazing Sun Shone Down Upon Us Did We Know That True Enemy Was The Voice Of Blind Idolatry; And Only Then Did We Begin To Think For Ourselves should go on this list for both length of the song, and it's title.

/Red Sparowes has a bad habit of way too long titles

If they are going to pick anything off Tales From the Topographic Oceans they should have picked The Ancient, which was much more obviously padded. Most of these songs are very good, and the only part of Thick as a Brick I would cut is the Do you believe in the day part.

no minutemen?

Stranglehold.

Given that the first few don't go over 10 minutes, this is nothing more than a list of music that the writer doesn't like.

Big Whoop. Hell, I'm surprised he didn't include SOD's "Ballad Of Jimi Hendrix." The length of that one must have been interminable to him.

Did he only include songs he could find Youtube links for? What about Passion Play, 2112, live version of Dazed and Confused, November Rain, Feels So Good and Magician's Birthday from Uriah Heep.

Gavin Bryars - Jesus' Blood Never Failed Me Yet

/any version

The Ghost of Freedom:
I was glad not to see GY!BE on there though. BBFIII is the only one that annoys me a bit and that's b/c of the person ranting not the music.

Speaking of vocals on Godspeed...this always gives me a little chill...

/not for the impatient
//and doesn't really have the music part, so not the best introduction to Godspeed

Waiting for the sun⁵

Nothing on this record shouldn't have been longer than 3 and a half minutes, TOPS:


/actually like the album
//still really disappointed with it

Hello...

No Green Grass High Tides?

Multiple guitar solos by different rednecks...clocks in at about 17.5 minutes.

My .02

misery faded: Nothing on this record shouldn't have been longer than 3 and a half minutes, TOPS:


Heh, Shoot Me Again actually came on while I was reading this article and I got bored and went to the next track on my random playlist after about 4 minutes.

muck4doo: A couple I'd add:

Hey Jude by The Beatles

.

are you farking kidding me?

i'd rather see a list of songs that are too short.

'Devil went down' is shiat; not 'THE shiat', just shiat.

Glad no Parliament/P Funk/Funkadelic is on the list or I would get angry.

Everone of these guy's songs are about 3 minutes too long.

www.myspace.com/orificedeath

Crazy Game of Poker - OAR

'The Ballad of Jimi Hendrix' by S.O.D.

irockalot: Stranglehold.

this.

any length of time I have to listen to a metallica song is far too long as far as I'm concerned-- bleechhh

Thick As a Brick

Fark you starpulse.com. Fark you. Thick As A Brick is one of the most awesome songsalbums ever.

Making fun of Pink Floyd is blasphemy and Thick as a Brick is one of the best albums ever. I'll admit that and I'm not even a big fan of Jethro Tull.

Thick as a Brick is amazing
Don't diss Pink Floyd
American Pie is a really good song
Devil Went Down to Georgia is much much better than he makes it out to be
Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald... fark you whoever wrote this list