What's the deal with all the fail this month?

First the Patriots*, then these creationists , and now this. On top of all that, Hillary may fail before the month is out.

Strads are, quite honestly, pieces of crap. They are as much of a marketing ploy as the chunks of rock known as diamonds.

Violins, violas, cellos, etc., have been made in my family for three generations.

King Something: What's the deal with all the fail this month?

Word is the Freemasons have sent people back in time to put a weird chemical in the water supply.

I'm a clumsy oaf, so I'm really getting a kick out of this Stradivarius

Must have been a pretty shiatty case.

Poor sap, I'm playing the world's smallest violin for him.

I was laughing like mad all through the story, because it was the living manifestation of a Monty Python skit. If you don't have "Another Monty Python Record" (the one with the classical album cover all crossed-out in crayon) GET IT! It has this bit where a virtuoso's trying to play a concert and he keeps crushing violins. Meanwhile, God-of-comedy Michael Palin is describing it in the calm tones of a classical radio jock.

It's followed by another virtuoso playing Vivaldi during a 400-foot plunge into a bucket of boiling fat.

Funniest. Disc. Ever.

How many violins did this Stradivarius dude make in his life, because every self-respecting violinist seems to have one. And are they really so special that no one in the past 300 years has been able to reproduce that sound?

SpinStopper: Violins, violas, cellos, etc., have been made in my family for three generations.

We are to take it that your family name is not Stradivari, then?

bikkurikun: How many violins did this Stradivarius dude make in his life, because every self-respecting violinist seems to have one. And are they really so special that no one in the past 300 years has been able to reproduce that sound?

Because he made them from wood during the "mini ice age," the wood was more dense then what is available today.
http://www.acfnewsource.org/art/nice_weather_music.html

Though, to me it seems you could just use mountain top trees that also grow much slower. Those trees are generally protected though.

bikkurikun: How many violins did this Stradivarius dude make in his life, because every self-respecting violinist seems to have one. And are they really so special that no one in the past 300 years has been able to reproduce that sound?

Not all that many. (new window)

Has to be said...

Lars The Canadian Viking: Those trees are generally protected though.

Not against chainsaws.

I'm sure the fines would be offset by the sales of the instruments. Curious if any of the governments in these locals have anything subjecting future prices of the wood to fee/taxes.

/obligatory

Crescent City Cat-Daddy: /obligatory

The lower-3 shocker, nice going.

I've heard David Garrett play and he is a wonderful musician. I feel bad for him, but with his look and talent, I'm sure he'll get over it. As for the Strad, I'm willing to bet that thing is insured for any possible damage, including being vomit on by larks, or smashed by a larch.

/had to get in a MP ref

With modern technology, I don't see why composite wood with the same properties can't be replicated.

In 1999 the world-renowned cellist Yo-Yo Ma...

Yo mama jokes must be the bane of his life.

binnster: In 1999 the world-renowned cellist Yo-Yo Ma...

Yo mama jokes must be the bane of his life.

Yo mama was so tone def that she couldn't tell a middle C on a Stradivarius from a B sharp.

Stevie Ray Vaughan's Stratovarius had it's neck snapped when a stage prop fell on it not long before he died. Everyone who ever got a hold of it said it was the best-sounding Strat they'd ever played.

kidsizedcoffin: Crescent City Cat-Daddy: /obligatory

The lower-3 shocker, nice going.

Well, I won't claim to be an expert a lot of topics, but in THIS particular field, I am willing to put my credentials against the leading people of this field.

What is definitely shown in this photo is "the show stopper" Worry not. I shall waive my fee for this consultation.

The accident threatened to leave the musician without a suitable instrument to play

That is such garbage. People make violins today that are as good as any Strad, and they cost only $5,000. When they test their violins in an audio lab, their violins are as good or better than a Strad.

Strads and Amatis are expensive because people of our era can't believe that such wonderful instruments could have been made back then.

They are paying for a piece of history.

kidsizedcoffin: binnster: In 1999 the world-renowned cellist Yo-Yo Ma...

Yo mama jokes must be the bane of his life.

Yo mama was so tone def that she couldn't tell a middle C on a Stradivarius from a B sharp.

Hah! Nice musical Rotsky.

kidsizedcoffin: With modern technology, I don't see why composite wood with the same properties can't be replicated.

A flute made out of concrete sounds exactly the same as one made out of metal or wood, but people still insist on having one made out of trees on the verge of extinction.

SpinStopper: Strads are, quite honestly, pieces of crap. They are as much of a marketing ploy as the chunks of rock known as diamonds.

Violins, violas, cellos, etc., have been made in my family for three generations.

So you wouldn't be biased or anything ehh?

kidsizedcoffin
Yo mama was so tone def that she couldn't tell a middle C on a Stradivarius from a B sharp.

Oh! I see what you did there...

WHAT?! A wool cap and hip clothes while playing with an orchestra?! He didn't just break his violin, he broke all the rules.

Strads are like the Monster cables of the violin world.

bikkurikun: are they really so special that no one in the past 300 years has been able to reproduce that sound?

I saw a report on Nova about this years ago. They weren't able to reproduce the sound, until they did an analysis of the varnish/shellac. It turns out that back in the day, they used powdered sapphire in the varnish. Once they reproduced the varnish, the sound was indistinguishable. You would think that the "modern Strad" would be widely used by pros, and only the highest-end performers would have a real Strad.

Haven't I seen this story before? (new window)

kidsizedcoffin:
Yo mama was so tone def that she couldn't tell a middle C on a Stradivarius from a B sharp.

Haven't you heard you gotta treat yo mama with respect?

/I can highly recommend it. (^)

biobot: kidsizedcoffin:
Yo mama was so tone def that she couldn't tell a middle C on a Stradivarius from a B sharp.

Haven't you heard you gotta treat yo mama with respect?

/I can highly recommend it. (^)

As much as my momma must have been dissed, I have youtube blocked on the network. Internal studies suggest that this has increased our IQ.

I can't believe I got tired of "FAIL" before I got tired of lolcats.

/rly

It's "Electric Dreams" all over again

In 1999 the world-renowned cellist Yo-Yo Ma left his £1.25m 1733 Stradivarius cello in the boot of a New York taxi.

When he travels, Ma buys an extra first-class seat for his Strad. One flight my wife was stewing for him and she grabbed the thing and said, "Here, let me stow this for you!"
He about had a fit.

Zonc: I can't believe I got tired of "FAIL" before I got tired of lolcats.

/rly



Does that help?

In 1999 the world-renowned cellist Yo-Yo Ma left his £1.25m 1733 Stradivarius cello in the boot of a New York taxi.


Before that goof he was only known as Ma.

Yo wife stews for Yo Mama?

What a nice daughter-in-law!

I almost cried when I read this article. It's a priceless instrument, yes; but it's an extension of yourself too. My violin is nowhere NEAR the quality of a Strad; it's a bare bones $1000 instrument. But if something ever happened to my instrument, I'd die. It's a part of me. Something that can't be understood by people who are not true musicians.

kidsizedcoffin: As much as my momma must have been dissed, I have youtube blocked on the network.

My condolences. Look up "John Butler Trio" sometime. You won't be sorry.

Internal studies suggest that this has increased our IQ.

There's a Fark headline there somewhere. I'm just too stupid to see it.

binnster: In 1999 the world-renowned cellist Yo-Yo Ma...

Yo mama jokes must be the bane of his life.

Did you hear about the time Ma's mother stole a toy from the rapper 50 Cent?
50 tracked Ma down and was heard to say, "Yo yo yo, Yo-Yo Ma! Yo mama got ma yo-yo!"

Stratihoovius?

Juylie: But if something ever happened to my instrument, I'd die. It's a part of me. Something that can't be understood by people who are not true musicians.

Nonsense. I feel exactly the same about my willie.

biobot: kidsizedcoffin: As much as my momma must have been dissed, I have youtube blocked on the network.

My condolences. Look up "John Butler Trio" sometime. You won't be sorry.

Internal studies suggest that this has increased our IQ.

There's a Fark headline there somewhere. I'm just too stupid to see it.

I may or may or not agree with said fark headline, but I have yet to see a youtube link that warants my mass ban. I'm alwasy willing to test them as a test for the DMZ, but they are mostly filtered on my network.

I once got to play a Stradivarius. One year in high school, my orchestra stand partner was a girl who was very, very good at all things music-related. Her whole family was. They had a Stradivarius in their family, and she would only bring it to school to play in concerts. Before a concert one day, while we were warming up, she let me try it out.

I expected it to feel and sound way better than my violin (a fake Stainer whose only redeeming quality was that it was handmade). Imagine my surprise when I found that I couldn't tell any difference in the sound, and it felt the same as mine. I was pretty shocked, to be honest (especially considering I hadn't changed my strings in over a year at that point... I didn't take very good care of my violin).

I gave the Stradivarius back to her and told her what I thought. She refused to talk to me for about a week.

0Icky0

When he travels, Ma buys an extra first-class seat for his Strad. One flight my wife was stewing for him and she grabbed the his thing and said, "Here, let me stow this for you!"
He about had a fit.

FTFY

NURBS: I gave the Stradivarius back to her and told her what I thought. She refused to talk to me for about a week.

Most people can't tell the difference. Not insulting you, most people can't tell the difference in music recorded with a 20khz and a 22khz limit.

Those who are able to hear it, don't represent the public, but it may be worth noting, that they may be your reviewers.

What Juylie said...