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(Canada.com) Ironic The Onion apologizes to local firefighter after firefighter's mother saw his picture in their paper and believed that he really had lost his lifelong battle with fire   (canada.com) divider line 67
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phillydrifter 2008-02-01 05:55:29 AM  
me* after reading this headline:

www.esplatter.com

/*not really me

 
SweetSilverBlues 2008-02-01 09:03:48 AM  
"We're really, really sorry, but it's not our fault."

Yup, that's The Onion.

 
Inbredpoet 2008-02-01 09:03:53 AM  
That headline is overflowing with awesome goodness.
I give you the coveted "gold plated win"

 
tfm_copycat 2008-02-01 09:04:55 AM  
Why The Onion has to apologize for what they do? It's a fake news website, if anyone goes there believing the stories are true, don't deserve an internet.

 
SamTana 2008-02-01 09:04:58 AM  
Message for Capt. Rudy - your mom called, wants to know if you're dead.

PS: Call your mom more often.

 
PoochUMD 2008-02-01 09:07:06 AM  
How is this even mistaken for irony??

 
This 2008-02-01 09:07:41 AM  
Wait, they use real pics for their fake news? What?

 
The_Religious_Left 2008-02-01 09:08:51 AM  
tfm_copycat: Why The Onion has to apologize for what they do? It's a fake news website, if anyone goes there believing the stories are true, don't deserve an internet.

While I generally agree with that, you can't really apply that to a 82 year old lady. It just sounds like an unfortunate mix-up.

The Onion Article (new window)

 
nautimike 2008-02-01 09:10:25 AM  
And why was and 82 year old women even reading the Onion?

 
The_Religious_Left 2008-02-01 09:11:52 AM  
nautimike: And why was and 82 year old women even reading the Onion?

Maybe fark was down.

 
Bagelox-99 2008-02-01 09:20:36 AM  
Canadians, especially older ones, do tend to live in a humor-free zone.

/case in point: Lorne Michaels

 
Rev. Skarekroe [TotalFark] 2008-02-01 09:20:55 AM  
nautimike: And why was and 82 year old women even reading the Onion?

I'm guessing it went something like this:

Old lady's younger neighbor: Hey, I saw your son on theonion.com today!

Old lady: Really? Let me get on the interwebs and see... Oh my God my angel is dead!!!

 
Inbredpoet 2008-02-01 09:21:05 AM  
The_Religious_Left: nautimike: And why was and 82 year old women even reading the Onion?

Maybe fark was down.


She was laughed out of Fark for Trolling...

 
Inbredpoet 2008-02-01 09:22:05 AM  
Forgot to say
her Name is Whoopty

 
trapped-in-CH 2008-02-01 09:29:13 AM  
I'm still waiting for them to apologize for not being funny.

 
imfallen_angel 2008-02-01 09:30:41 AM  
Even at 82, I would have though that the article using a different name than her son, could have given her a clue.

I could see that she/he could have been curious to why his picture was used, but, to actually confuse something like this.

The first clue would probably be the fact that he was probably next to her, still breathing, or something like that.

/hoping that I don't get this easily confused one day.

 
jmcfarl3 2008-02-01 09:31:29 AM  
Sounds like Mom needs to grow up... what's that? you say she's already 82 but still as naive as that 12-year-old i took to prom? perhaps Mom should STFU and GTFO the internet

/matrix-style octogenarian recycling facility

 
Sid Vicious' Corpse 2008-02-01 09:32:11 AM  
From the article:

In earlier interviews, however, Capt. Lindia said colleagues who have heard about or seen the article, which was published Sept. 12, 2006, started calling him "dead man walking" whenever he entered a room.

that made me spit coffee.

 
ElFugawz 2008-02-01 09:34:17 AM  
Rev. Skarekroe: nautimike: And why was and 82 year old women even reading the Onion?

I'm guessing it went something like this:

Old lady's younger neighbor: Hey, I saw your son on theonion.com today!

Old lady: Really? Let me get on the interwebs and see... Oh my God my angel is dead!!!


Old lady (sobbing): and he's from Iowa!!!

 
sombreradoraloca 2008-02-01 09:37:15 AM  
Kind of makes the future of The Onion as it stands somewhat questionable.

 
Pert 2008-02-01 09:37:23 AM  
Subby - RTFA.

Everyone else saying things like "I'm guessing it went something like this" - RTFA

His mother "failed to see the humour in the website's story".

He's pissed off because he thought his picture had only been taken for use in recruitment campaigns. The Onion are pissed off because they paid good money to buy a stock photo of a fireman to use in an article and it turns out the guy in the photo is pissed off.

That's it, in a nutshell.

Twats.

/Sorry, just had a couple of beers at lunchtime and have lost patience with humanity until it's time to go home and drink wine.

 
RussianPooper [TotalFark] 2008-02-01 09:38:08 AM  
FTFA:

Castillo, who over the years had become a symbol of courage to countless individuals faced with their own deadly blazes, passed away early Sunday morning at a suburban home, surrounded by family members, neighbors, fellow firefighters, and raging, crackling flames.

Did she think that she just didn't get invited?

 
Epiphany 2008-02-01 09:38:11 AM  
i wonder if the onion has a huge farking room full of blackboards with tally marks on it every time they pown someone into thinking their fake story is real

 
sendtodave 2008-02-01 09:38:39 AM  
Mom "failed to see humor" in the Onion story.

Columnist implies that it "may have given the impression" the guy died.

Therefore, the mom feared that her son died.

In Des Moine, Iowa. Under an assumed name.

 
The_Religious_Left 2008-02-01 09:39:58 AM  
Inbredpoet: The_Religious_Left: nautimike: And why was and 82 year old women even reading the Onion?

Maybe fark was down.

She was laughed out of Fark for Trolling...


I was just thinking the other day. If my grandmother were to post on fark she'd be called a troll.

 
The Malingerer 2008-02-01 09:40:21 AM  
Like my father always said, apologies are for sissies.

 
SweetSilverBlues 2008-02-01 09:41:33 AM  
Capt. Lindia told the CBC he signed a waiver at the time, but thought it was simply a form allowing the city to use his image.

Yup, cuz reading things before signing them is SO passe.

 
ZachF81 2008-02-01 09:45:24 AM  
jmcfarl3: Sounds like Mom needs to grow up... what's that? you say she's already 82 but still as naive as that 12-year-old i took to prom? perhaps Mom should STFU and GTFO the internet

/matrix-style octogenarian recycling facility



You took a 12-year-old to prom?

/so did you get laid?

 
Ermungslos 2008-02-01 09:48:11 AM  
This reminds me of an old Doug Stanhope bit...

"Old people always tell you: 'When you've been around as long I have, then you can argue.' As soon as they're ripped off, it's a different story."

He puts on a mournful, imploring voice. "'They took advantage of me because I'm old. They called up and said I'd won a new Mercedes, and all I had to do was leave $8,000 in a locker at the bus station. I was sceptical at first, because I've been burned by this 11 or 12 times before.'"


/hilarious

 
TheNintendoKid 2008-02-01 09:50:44 AM  
People are stupid.

The one time that the Onion set a story in our little Eastern Iowa town (pop. ~3000), they ran the story in the local newspaper DIRECTLY UNDER a story headlines "Satirical newspaper "The Onion" bases story in Tipton, IA" and put a satire disclaimer directly before the article itself.

The Editor got two calls wanting to know 'who the hell the Sensenbrenners' were, and six calls asking for the recipie for 'war pie.'


Sad post-script: 2 kids I went to high school with have now been killed in Iraq. My graduating class only had 66.

 
shivashakti [TotalFark] 2008-02-01 09:51:15 AM  
sombreradoraloca: Kind of makes the future of The Onion as it stands somewhat questionable.

How so?

 
factoryconnection 2008-02-01 09:51:18 AM  
sendtodave: Mom "failed to see humor" in the Onion story.

Columnist implies that it "may have given the impression" the guy died. Therefore, the mom feared that her son died. In Des Moine, Iowa. Under an assumed name.


Even stranger is that she was reading the Onion, which is fairly clear in its satire, and all-of-a-sudden decided to believe this one, incongruous story. That being said, it was likely forwarded to her from a friend, and entire nations have missed that same point previously. Still lame, either way; the internet may not be the place for blue-haired Betty.

 
Number41 2008-02-01 09:55:39 AM  
trapped-in-CH: I'm still waiting for them to apologize for not being funny.

Generally speaking, the Onion is a collection of funny headlines, which they take and draw out to obvious conclusions in the articles. I'm not sure why they even bother following up on the headlines - when's the last time you've seen someone quote something from within the story?

 
factoryconnection 2008-02-01 10:00:06 AM  
TheNintendoKid: The Editor got two calls wanting to know 'who the hell the Sensenbrenners' were, and six calls asking for the recipie for 'war pie.'

I saw that one coming from the opening of your post, but it was worth it. I can't say I blame them, though... people who post on here daily still get burned for missing giant chunks of important story elements. Folks calling newspapers, for their part, don't have the constant reminders to RTFA before spouting off.

Sorry about your classmates; so far the several servicemembers in my HS class (including me) have maintained a homecoming:deployment ratio of 1.

 
FunkyBlue 2008-02-01 10:05:05 AM  
Number41: Generally speaking, the Onion is a collection of funny headlines, which they take and draw out to obvious conclusions in the articles. I'm not sure why they even bother following up on the headlines - when's the last time you've seen someone quote something from within the story?

Oh, I don't know. I've seen references to this one before...

 
mruttan 2008-02-01 10:06:00 AM  
Heh, bunch of laptop quarterbacks in here today.

 
Monkey's Knuckle 2008-02-01 10:06:46 AM  
The solution is simple: kill the firefighter.

The Onion MAKES news.

 
discospinster 2008-02-01 10:07:35 AM  
Inbredpoet: That headline is overflowing with awesome goodness.
I give you the coveted "gold plated win"


The headline must have changed after it was greenlit.

 
WiteBuddha 2008-02-01 10:07:46 AM  
well people are stupid, but its nice to hear the onion apologized for the mixup even though it honestly wasn't their fault...

they could have easily told the old bat to 'fark off' and no one would have cared... but they took a high rode not often seen on the internet...

/can't get too mushy, though, they might soften up too much

 
Bagelox-99 2008-02-01 10:10:45 AM  
sendtodave: Mom "failed to see humor" in the Onion story.

Columnist implies that it "may have given the impression" the guy died.

Therefore, the mom feared that her son died.

In Des Moine, Iowa. Under an assumed name.


Alzheimer's FTW.

When nothing makes sense anymore, suddenly anything can make sense. Especially if it triggers deep memory: family, home, childhood, soup-or-sex...

/better make it soup

 
ruta [recently expired TotalFark] 2008-02-01 10:16:40 AM  
Just because she "failed to see the humour" in the article does not mean that she took it seriously. I expect that many people's mothers would fail to see the humour in... well... most Onion articles. For the last couple of years I've failed to see the humour in the Onion. I know it's satire, but they ran out of funny 'round about 2000, picked up a bit with "HOLY SHIAT AMERICA UNDER ATTACK!", and then lost it again.

Nonetheless, the firefighter was a bit of a doofus for not reading the fine print when he signed his photo away.

 
angry_scientist 2008-02-01 10:27:15 AM  
Bagelox-99: , soup-or-sex...

/better make it soup


I'll take the Super-Sex, please

 
AeroBrewer 2008-02-01 10:31:00 AM  
tfm_copycat: Why The Onion has to apologize for what they do? It's a fake news website, if anyone goes there believing the stories are true, don't deserve an internet.

I think they're doing it to be gentlemen about the whole matter. They've been thrusting into this situation by someone else's jackassery. Someone owes these people an apology, I commend The Onion for being super-grownup and doing for the shameless asshats.

 
FlatusJones 2008-02-01 10:35:13 AM  
Rev. Skarekroe: Old lady: Really? Let me get on the interwebs and see... Oh my God my angel is dead!!!

Yeah, even though the article is talking about some other guy who lives in Des Moines.

 
tuna fingers 2008-02-01 10:47:25 AM  
Bagelox-99: Canadians, especially older ones, do tend to live in a humor-free zone.

/case in point: Lorne Michaels

//John Candy (when still with us)
///Brent Butt (wait, maybe I like that show)
////John Candy (still not funny)

 
tuna fingers 2008-02-01 10:51:09 AM  
The_Religious_Left: Inbredpoet: The_Religious_Left: nautimike: And why was and 82 year old women even reading the Onion?

Maybe fark was down.

She was laughed out of Fark for Trolling...

I was just thinking the other day. If my grandmother were to post on fark she'd be called a troll.


Maybe not, I think it would depend on her pics in profile. Does she BIE?

 
Shakespeare's Monkey 2008-02-01 10:59:13 AM  
I still think The Onion has some funny bits. This one made me laugh.

 
ZAZ [TotalFark] 2008-02-01 11:02:36 AM  
One of my greenlights from years past: Newspaper tells worried readers that just because they read something in The Onion doesn't mean it's true. "Apparently some in the country are less Internet savvy than others"

 
The_Religious_Left 2008-02-01 11:12:48 AM  
tuna fingers: Maybe not, I think it would depend on her pics in profile. Does she BIE?

Hell no. She has more self respect than that. If you want to see anything, you better have some beads.

 
Bacontastesgood 2008-02-01 11:13:21 AM  
SweetSilverBlues: Capt. Lindia told the CBC he signed a waiver at the time, but thought it was simply a form allowing the city to use his image.

Yup, cuz reading things before signing them is SO passe.


Exactly. So many people just see a line on the bottom of a form and put their sig on their as a reflex.

 
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