That quote sounds like she had a bunch of legs stuck in here hoo ha.

jazzmajora: That quote sounds like she had a bunch of legs stuck in here hoo ha.

Centipedes? In her vagina? What are the odds?

I'm gonna go get the plans for my house... gotta check for crawl spaces and cellars.

You plumber - YOU BROUGHT HER!

But was the cellar dressed like a tiger?

(or a virus?)

What were they doing there in the first place?

Manly Pointer unavailable for comment.

this sounds familiar. might this be a repeat?

How nice of them to lend a hand...

/harr harr

Classic UK reporting. Embedded in the story is a huge question -what the fark were they doing there?- and it is completely ignored in the story.

It's always nice to see people helping others get back on their feet.

It will give them a leg up on their recovery!



BA-Dum-Chhh!

/Please be sure to tip your waitress

Andrew McCarthy unavailable for comment.

Thousands died


/FYI
//in case you didn't know already

True, noone seems to care how they got there or what the plans of the original owner may have been...

Wasn't there a hospital missing these limbs ? Or paraplegics missing their replacement limbs for the ones that got missing before?

White puff of smoke also possible?

Have the reporters been put on the wrong foot ?

"The average wage in Pakistan is £50 a month. State-of-the-art prosthesis cost between £2,000 to £4,000."

Getting a random peg leg from under some guy's crawlspace: Priceless. About tree fiddy.

They are giving away the property of the former owner of the house.
If he shows up and files a legal claim against them, they won't have a leg to stand on.

/Thanks, try the veal...

Guess that couple had several legs to stand on.

belgianguy: Wasn't there a hospital missing these limbs ? Or paraplegics missing their replacement limbs for the ones that got missing before?

Or did we stumble upon the lair of the Dorset Limb Snatcher?

Smell the Glove: Centipedes? In her vagina?

"Centipedes? In MY vagina?!"

I call bullsh*t. The wife was surprised. The husband was not. He's a fetishist. That is my Fark analysis.

And somewhere in England, there is a amputee centipede that wants its artificial limbs back.

I agree completely, Monkey's Knuckle! How the hell did hundreds of prosthetic legs get into their cellar (which they didn't even know they had!) Here are some of the possible scenarios I've envisioned:

1. The last owner/occupier of the place was a funeral director, and he collected the legs/crutches of dead people. (weird, but not too weird)
2. The last owner/occupier of the place was a maker of prosthetic legs and he collected his "failures" and kept them in case they might later be needed. (not too weird/creepy)
3. The last owner/occupier of the place was a serial killer who targetted people with prosthetic legs and he kept the legs as "trophies" - CREEEPY!!

I'm a thigh guy, myself...

RealFarknMcCoy2: I agree completely, Monkey's Knuckle! How the hell did hundreds of prosthetic legs get into their cellar (which they didn't even know they had!) Here are some of the possible scenarios I've envisioned:

1. The last owner/occupier of the place was a funeral director, and he collected the legs/crutches of dead people. (weird, but not too weird)
CREEEPY!!

Notice that they don't mention:

1. How long the couple has been living there
2. How old the legs are.


This is about as mysterious as a wife who finds kiddie porn adn teh husband feigns surprise along with her.

jazzmajora: That quote sounds like she had a bunch of legs stuck in here hoo ha.

At first all I saw was "wife" "plumber went down" "legs" and "hatch" so you can imagine what I thought of before I read the full headline.

My first assumption was that there was gonna be a Florida tag and something between a plumber, husband and his wife had gone terribly wrong.

It really makes you wonder what the guy that lived they first did for a living.

Because I somehow doubt that they all belonded to one person.

Will no one go out on a limb and make a snarky comment?

Um ... OK ... I'll bite.

Why did a taxi driver have a big stash of artificial limbs under his floorboards?

Nice article for not even attempting to find an answer to that question.

o4tuna: They are giving away the property of the former owner of the house.
If he shows up and files a legal claim against them, they won't have a leg to stand on.

/Thanks, try the veal...

Um. No.

You'd think a journalist might have made the effort to figure out where all these legs came from. That might have made a more interesting story. And using an earthquake for a news peg for this story seemed a little strange, even if there was a link.

I don't don't want to give a knee jerk reaction, but do you thing the reporter pitched this story to the editor and he asked, does this story have legs? Run with it! The sad part is none of these people will be able to participate in the Olympics.

RealFarknMcCoy2: I agree completely, Monkey's Knuckle! How the hell did hundreds of prosthetic legs get into their cellar (which they didn't even know they had!) Here are some of the possible scenarios I've envisioned:

1. The last owner/occupier of the place was a funeral director, and he collected the legs/crutches of dead people. (weird, but not too weird)
2. The last owner/occupier of the place was a maker of prosthetic legs and he collected his "failures" and kept them in case they might later be needed. (not too weird/creepy)
3. The last owner/occupier of the place was a serial killer who targetted people with prosthetic legs and he kept the legs as "trophies" - CREEEPY!!

You forgot the possibility that the previous owner had a fetish for prosthetic legs and possible used them for sexual stimulation and gratification.

I'm not sure where that fits on your weird/creepy scale.

I personally find it fascinating, as long as he doesn't pose as a bible salesman to get close to his unwilling victims from whom he steals the legs. That would be weird and creepy!

At first all I saw was "wife" "plumber went down" "legs" and "hatch" so you can imagine what I thought of before I read the full headline.

I was also disappointed how the story failed to live up to the promise of those words.

The previous owner was saving up to pay the plumber who charges an arm and a leg and a leg and leg...

Thumbs up to homeowner for a great donation. I guess the other choice would have been to sell them to the guy who makes the Christmas Story lamps?

candiru.fish: RealFarknMcCoy2:

You forgot the possibility that the previous owner had a fetish for prosthetic legs and possible used them for sexual stimulation and gratification.

I'm not sure where that fits on your weird/creepy scale.

I personally find it fascinating, as long as he doesn't pose as a bible salesman to get close to his unwilling victims from whom he steals the legs. That would be weird and creepy!

Read upthread. You're all forgetting the current owner may be a suspect.

Ihaveanevilparrot: jazzmajora: That quote sounds like she had a bunch of legs stuck in here hoo ha.

At first all I saw was "wife" "plumber went down" "legs" and "hatch" so you can imagine what I thought of before I read the full headline.

My first assumption was that there was gonna be a Florida tag and something between a plumber, husband and his wife had gone terribly wrong.

That was my first impression, as well.

Husband has a fetish, imo.

I'd really give an arm and a leg to know how those got down there...

FishingWithFredo: Why did a taxi driver have a big stash of artificial limbs under his floorboards?

To get to the other side?

Or off. Probably off.

"We didn't even know we had a cellar, let alone what was in it."

Excellent work by the home inspector.

"The plumber was repairing the bungalow's central heating system when he came across the collection..."

Um, you're doing it wrong.

When investigating the origin of the prosthetics, police were stumped.

/You guys are getting slow.

I knew a girl with fake legs and real feet.

"You forgot the possibility that the previous owner had a fetish for prosthetic legs and possible used them for sexual stimulation and gratification."

Eww, hope someone washed them off before shipping.

I think we're all ignoring the possibility of a husband and wife cannibal tag team who prey on the lame and injured. They both feigned surprise when the plumber found the leg stash.

Or reverse vampires



Any way you slice it, it ranks up there with the piles of manual typewriters that Guillermo Del Toro always places in sewers in his films. Creepy.

this was already on fark in august...nothing new here

Bucky Katt: this sounds familiar. might this be a repeat?

No. Follow up. Came here to say that.
/being a stickler

"My wife was quite amazed when the plumber went down"

I'm not a plumber, but I've had that same reaction from your wife.

At least she knows how to use 'em.

We're forgetting about the most obvious reason of all:

Tom Cruise put them there to help the people who suffered from the earthquake!

As you know, he's the only one who can really help...
Tough luck firefighters, medics and law enforcement, seems the world can cope without you...


/Tom and friends better hurry up with their take on the Kool-Aid drinking, it's about creepy as it's funny now IMO...