Animal massage? Uh...?

Smellvin: Animal massage? Uh...?

I hope that bill passes. You really don't net a vet's license to do equine massage, which is a thriving practice in certain areas.

Smellvin: Animal massage? Uh...?

Your dog wants a happy ending

I think they can safe a lot of extra work if they connect and combine the canned hunt/guranteed kill law with the buisnes owners' license to kill and/or the drunk drivers with the vanity licenses. Maybe connect them all together. It would be fun and also an enourmous potential revenue generator.

If a driver with a special license plate that marks hima a serial drunk driver enters the parking lot of a buisness, the owner will rightfully feel for his own safety and can thus legally charge customers for the chance to take potshots at them.

Smellvin: Animal massage? Uh...?

There's a rumour Tori Spelling will be in town later this year.

The Make My Day Better bill

Aw, sounds nice. Must be one of those Kucinich-hippy liberal types. What does it actually do now...free flowers? subsidized 'friends' for old people? Oh, it gives business owners the same rights to use deadly force against intruders at their businesses as homeowners have under Colorado's "Make My Day" law.

State seal is too big
Bills to remedy that and address other issues, such as canned hunts and drunken drivers, are in the hopper.
By John Ingold and Jennifer Brown
The Denver Post
Article Last Updated: 01/13/2008 02:07:06 AM MST

Leave it to the state legislature to make a to-do over a quarter of an inch.

The state seal, the little thing that gets stamped on official documents, is too large. Nobody makes the 2 1/2-inch dies Colorado uses for its official seal anymore, so the seal needs to be downsized to fit the more standard 2 1/4-inch die.

Simple, right?

Well, not really. Because the description of the state seal is written into law in minute detail, it takes a bill to change the size, which Rep. Ray Rose, R-Montrose, is dutifully carrying this year at the request of the secretary of state's office. (His bill would also allow the secretary of state to make future changes to the seal without legislative approval.)

"I'm sure when they put that in state statute and they described the state seal, no one would have had a clue that you would no longer be able to get a 2 1/2," Rose said.

Every year, amid the heaps of bills on weighty issues like health care, education and transportation, there are those that are a little out of the mainstream discussion.

Here are a few so far from this session.

House Bill 1096: The Canned Hunt.

A bill from Rep. Debbie Stafford - an Aurora Democrat and perennial advocate of animal rights - would outlaw the "guaranteed kill" of animals that have been caged, staked or confined.

About 25 businesses in Colorado are offering confined, farm-raised deer and elk for hunting, Stafford said.

"By selling a guaranteed kill, it becomes a rich man's hunting sport," she said. "I don't think that's fair hunting. There's not an opportunity for fair chase."

The legislation allows exemptions for agriculture and scientific research, such as slaughtering an animal for meat or humanely euthanizing one for health, safety or research.

House Bill 1066: The Make My Day Better bill.

Rep. Cory Gardner, R-Yuma, is back this year with a bill that passed in the House last year but failed in the Senate. It would give business owners the same rights to use deadly force against intruders at their businesses as homeowners have under Colorado's "Make My Day" law.

"I believe everybody has the right to defend themselves," Gardner said. "I think there's a lot of paranoia (about the bill). I think people think this will open up violence and make the streets run red with blood. That's absolutely untrue."

House Bill 1071: The Scarlet Driver's License.

Rose is sponsoring a bill that would require people convicted of drinking and driving to have specially colored driver's licenses. One offense would require a license with a green background. Two offenses in five years would require a red license.

Red licenses already exist, Rose said, and mean that a person can drive only between home and work.

The idea came to Rose from a constituent, whose daughter was killed by a repeat drunken driving offender.

"I'm sure I'm going to hear in testimony about how this discriminates against a DUI offender, and on, and on, and on. I would rather discriminate against a DUI offender," Rose said, "than have that person kill someone."

House Bill 1045: The License Plate Ax.

A bill by Rep. Joe Rice, D-Littleton, and Sen. Bob Hagedorn, D-Aurora, would place most of Colorado's specialty license plates under the same set of rules and subject them to the ax if 3,000 plates are not issued by Jan. 1, 2009.

If it passes, specialty plates for Denver firefighters, the Raptor Education Foundation and the Protective Order of Elks would need to get above the mark in order to survive, according to the Department of Revenue.

House Bill 1042: Animal Massage License Exemption

. Rep. Wes McKinley, D-Walsh, and Sen. Greg Brophy, R-Wray, are sponsoring a bill that would exempt people who perform animal massages from needing a veterinarian's license.

But it only applies if they have earned a "degree or certificate in animal massage from a state-approved or accredited school."

/ saved for posterity

Most of those are reasonable bills. What is the issue?

Bored Horde: Most of those are reasonable bills. What is the issue?

Just they all sound...odd. Or laden with double-entendre win.

Is this what we elect representatives to do? I think it's time we return to our Athenian roots: if everyone votes, no bullshiat would ever get proffered.


/Except in Florida
//Is Katherine Harris still fixing her make-up?

I wish the Georgia General Assembly's agenda looked as diverse. They're just planning to send all our water and tax money to Atlanta when they start up on Monday.

FTA: "Because the description of the state seal is written into law in minute detail, it takes a bill to change the size, which Rep. Ray Rose, R-Montrose, is dutifully carrying this year at the request of the secretary of state's office. (His bill would also allow the secretary of state to make future changes to the seal without legislative approval.)"

If this bill passes, I will make it my life's goal to become the CO Sec. of State. The state seal would be totally farked... and I would be SO fired.

zenobia: I wish the Georgia General Assembly's agenda looked as diverse. They're just planning to send all our water and tax money to Atlanta when they start up on Monday.

Try living in Il. Similar to ATL, Chicago is the motor that runs this state, but they control everything. Everything i scontrolled by democraps and the douches still cant get a budget passed that was supposed to be passed last June.

This just proves how awesome Colorado is. It's so laid back, this is the most serious thing anyone there has to worry about.

/moving back this July
//can't wait

Animal Massage - this is a field of study of which I had not been aware. Who are the professionals who commit their lives to the massaging of animals?

/so, she says, I'm an animal massager, and I says, really?

i'm sorry sir, you only stamped that 4 times. the seal cannot be changed without filling out the following 10 requisite forms before resubmitting the bill for committee.

aww it ate my pic

rehosted:

lytnngseed: Is this what we elect representatives to do? I think it's time we return to our Athenian roots: if everyone votes, no bullshiatthing would ever get proffered.


And that's why Greek Democracy failed: It's more and more impossible he more people you have.