Oh I had pneumonia
So I couldn't phone ya
But now I want to bone ya
So now I'm gonna phone ya


Stupid, repetitive and crude. I should be a rapper, but I'm a middle-aged Canadian white guy.

oh pneumonia it will own ya

i had a rapper's pneumonia
my mom sent a begonia
my honey sent a funny card
that said "i wanna bone ya"
i gotta lotta bed rest
with fluid in my chest
take out my tube and smoke a doob
that was my only request


/middle aged canadian white guys RULE the "lung infection rap" genre!

Wait, people still talk about Eminem?

Who?

They say he weighs over 200 lbs! He needs to lay off the chocolate.

Link

biatch i got sick i got the flu for you
it got old i got a cold gonna grow old with you
turnin' sixty-five when i arrive
with my pension
and apprehension
about going to the doctor like jim henson
and now i own ya
with my pneumonia

God damn ammonia.
Huffin gave me pneumonia.

Helpful tip for those attempting this rhyme: like urinating off a cliff, the p is silent.

Note to self: don't stand under cliffs.

Enuratique: God damn ammonia.
Huffin gave me pneumonia.
Watched a lot of b-ball- go Warriors of California!

In tha record biz, tha Jews own ya!

FTA: complications due to pneumonia

You heard it on Fark first. Eninem has AIDS.

Brown Jenkems: FTA: complications due to pneumonia

You heard it on Fark first. Eninem Eminem has AIDS.

/FTFM

But ewhat I really want to know is, which Farker is reading the damn Alaska newspaper???

rocinante721: In tha record biz, tha Jews own ya!

Tall Israelis are runnin' this rap sh*t.

Bologna?

My 5 year old is sick with pneumonia, so I'm really getting a kick out of these replies.

/she doesn't rap
//it'd be damn funny to watch her try though
///she's getting better (and at home)

Patagonia?

I'm holed up with this pneumonia, I knew shouldn't have boned ya
But this is all yo fault, Kim...I'm gonna kill ya.
And my Mom too. What a stupid biatch,
But I love my Haley, She keeps me rich.

uh. uh.

Turn up my headphones...can't hear the snare...

I'm serious nubian, I can't hear out of this ear!

I got a lion in my pocket i'm lyin i got a nine in my pocket.

Damn I got pneumonia, Think I got it in Estonia
But little did I know, I got it from some hoe
biatch had more fleas than a farkin dog show
But I gotta keep it clean, as I sip this Jim Beam
As I steam, from all this farkin anger
I got shiat locked up like an airplane hanger
This rhyme is a banger, motherfarker pull my finger
and then linger, and you'll hear the flatulence
Smells so bad you'll need to call an ambulance
Don't sit on the fence
Make up your damn mind, and you'll find
the truth, if your so inclined
Hit it out the park like the legend Babe Ruth
Like Mike Tyson I'll break your farkin tooth
or your teeth, your coked out like yasmine bleeth
or rick james, man i got control of these reins
speedy like secretariat, love it so much i wanna marry it
or bury it, just like your soul
while I watch and laugh as I smoke this bowl
fark payin a toll, or playin or role
cuz this ain't a damn play, this is a real damn day
and I'll just stay and watch you farkers play,
cause all the other rhymes here are real farkin gay.

AgentOrangeDrink: rocinante721: In tha record biz, tha Jews own ya!

Tall Israelis are runnin' this rap sh*t.

Nice Mos Def ref.

Look, if you had one shot, or one opportunity
To get pneumonia while ballooning up your weight to Fat-Joe proportions
Would you capture it or just let it slip?

Yo, His forks is sweaty, spoon weak, butter-knife is heavy
He's eaten cheesecake, frosted flakes mixed with mom's spaghetti
He's got pneumonia, but on the surface he looks calm and ready
To eat more, but he keeps difficulty breathin'
While heavin' that food down his chest
He opens his mouth, but only flemm spits out
He jammed a steak down his throat but now it won't come out
He's chokin, how his skin looks bloated now

You better chew your food even if you feel sick, the moment
You want it , you better never let it go
Grab a tissue and do not miss your chance to blow
This opportunity comes once in a lifetime, doh

Is there more than one Eminem now so we have to refer to THE Eminem, and not just Eminem?

How does he manage to keep looking like he's 14?

The "over 200 lbs" thing didn't seem like an issue to me until I looked him up on IMDB. I had no idea that little bastard was only 5'8".

/Put down the sammich, shortstack.

D200 - I'll sit on you

[Chorus: Eminem]
I will sit on you I don't care who you are- I'LL SIT ON YOU
I don't give a fark a-bout you or your car- I'LL SIT ON YOU

J. Frank Parnell
How does he manage to keep looking like he's 14?

The Hip Hop/Rap Fountain of Youth?

Aw, man! What happened to him? I may have gotten the gag reflex looking at his nekkid shot. His salsa used to make all the pretty girls dance and want to take off their underpants... his salsa.

:(

/he clearly ate every single ounce of the salsa.

Calvin Klein kind of...
North Carolina!

When in the hospital, did his oxygen go
'round the outside
'round the outside
'round the outside?

Where can this slutty chick go.
To, uh, bang this man with a runny nose.
Uh, uh, I don't compare to those other fat, ugly hoes.
I like me a man, that slimes from the butt,
With a crusty eye and an oversized gut.
Nothing says sexy like a pasty face,
labored breathing and a breath so nasty I can taste...
It all in my mouth, makes a girl want to slowly go down south.
Don't matter if you haven't showered for days,
Cuz you been sick in a foggy haze.
I like them sticky and stinky, to remind me that I am a lucky girl.
We can do it nice and slow. I know you out of it but in the end we can say "F*ck the Free World"

ingineervt and farkingbubbler win the Internet for today.

'Cuz this looks like Pneuomonia to me!
Every time I blow my nose, it's plain to see,
My lungs begin to hurt, have sympathy,
'cuz i have pneumonia, inside me!

/"HOLY WHACK UNLYRICAL LYRICS ANDRE!"
//"TO THE RAPMOBILE!"

This thread proves rapping takes more talent than most would like to admit.

This thread proves rapping takes more less talent than most would like to admit.

Fixed.

Try to make a living doing it then

ingineervt: This thread proves FTFYing takes less talent than most would like to admit.

FTFYed

I dreamed when I had pneumonia,
I loved you
I wanted to enthrone ya.
But I was angry
I wanted to disown ya,
I didn't need your love.

That wasn't toohard.

LewDux: ingineervt: This thread proves FTFYing takes less talent than most would like to admit.

FTFYed


touche

Words that rhyme with 'pneumonia':
'begonia', 'ammonia' and 'cubic zirconia'
/@2:20

can someone find the recent Fat Photo of him???

Got the pneumonia after getting down with Apollonia
I knew I shouldnt've boned her since
The biatch was once with Prince

/ta dah

HIV/Aids related symtoms..ownya

If Magic can gain weight, so can MM.

bingethinker: Oh I had pneumonia
So I couldn't phone ya
But now I want to bone ya
So now I'm gonna phone ya


Stupid, repetitive and crude. I should be a rapper, but I'm a middle-aged Canadian white guy.


approves

I guess penicillin could not get the illin' to stop. Amoxicillin's just not real enough.

spaghetti spaghetti spaghetti

gotta make this comedy shiat happen...

ChronosXD: ingineervt and farkingbubbler win the Internet for today.

Just woke up (3rd shift). TYFW. Will gladly claim prize tomorrow (or is it tonight?).

Just wish I could have headlined mine before it went green...

bingethinker: Oh I had pneumonia
So I couldn't phone ya
But now I want to bone ya
So now I'm gonna phone ya


Stupid, repetitive and crude. I should be a rapper, but I'm a middle-aged Canadian white guy.


Snow?!?