Police launch full scale search to find man that kills deer with a rope

That Brasky is a sunuvab*tch!

/To Bill Brasky!

I could kill a dear with a string. I'm that badass.

He was just out walking his deer and it got loose from the rope?

Probably Chuck Norris.

/nothin'

^^^
wanted for questioning

I demand a photoshopped pic of Chuck Norris killng a deer with some rope NOW!

My sister calls me up the other day. Wants to know what she thinks of her new idea.

See, she has gotten some deer to come up and eat food out of her hand. The image of this is bambi falling in love with the kind helpful human.

So her idea is this-She wants to use a taser on the deer, and then cut its throat while its down. Killing it in a spray of arterial blood that will no doubt look like something from the kill bill movies-with the volume turned down. She can't shoot them because its not hunting season and the neighbors might call the cops over the gunfire,

Genius? insanity? or "hey yall, come watch this!"? Either way I have volunteered to video tape her attempt just in case the deer kicks her ass. I have some hopes she will call me to come video it as soon as she gets a taser gun. I'm almost tempted to get her one just for the possible entertainment value if a deer kicks my sisters ass.

"The woman believes the man was hunting for deer since it is a woody area

She hasn't seen my woody area.....

/had to

Take double edged razor and embed in a groove of salt lick.
Wait for deer.
When deer suns tongue up lick it will cut its tongue and lift its head and drink it self to death.
If a bear approachs, run like hell.
A bear with a slit tongue will tear the hell out of anything in a 3 mile radius whene it realizes it's been rick rolled.

You can also take a razor and swim behind a deer crossing a river and when it is almost to the other side, climb on its back and slit its throat. Clean it in the water.

/the more you know.

killgorn oh dear

Wanted for questioning.

Greywar: My sister calls me up the other day. Wants to know what she thinks of her new idea.

See, she has gotten some deer to come up and eat food out of her hand. The image of this is bambi falling in love with the kind helpful human.

So her idea is this-She wants to use a taser on the deer, and then cut its throat while its down. Killing it in a spray of arterial blood that will no doubt look like something from the kill bill movies-with the volume turned down. She can't shoot them because its not hunting season and the neighbors might call the cops over the gunfire,

Genius? insanity? or "hey yall, come watch this!"? Either way I have volunteered to video tape her attempt just in case the deer kicks her ass. I have some hopes she will call me to come video it as soon as she gets a taser gun. I'm almost tempted to get her one just for the possible entertainment value if a deer kicks my sisters ass.

Your sister wouldn't, by any chance, be from Louisiana?

Lampmonster: I could kill a dear with a string. I'm that badass.

I could strangle a bull moose with a garrote made of thread woven from strands of its own nad hairs.

/ Hardcore.

Your sister wouldn't, by any chance, be.....

MooseUpNorth:
I could strangle a bull moose with a garrote made of thread woven from strands of its own nad hairs.

/ Hardcore.

I could kill a bear with an eyelash

/hardercore

From an otherwise unfetchable website and written by 'an author that would like to remain anonymous' I had this idea that I was going to rope a deer, put it in a stall, feed it up on corn for a couple of weeks, then kill it and eat it.

The first step in this adventure was getting a deer. I figured that since they congregated at my cattle feeder and do not seem to have much fear of me when we are there (a bold one will sometimes come right up and sniff at the bags of feed while I am in the back of the truck not 4 feet away) that it should not be difficult to rope one, get up to it and toss a bag over its head (to calm it down) then hog tie it and transport it home.

I filled the cattle feeder, then hid down at the end with my rope. The cattle, which had seen the roping thing before, stayed well back. They were not having any of it. After about 20 minutes, my deer showed up, 3 of them. I picked out a likely looking one, stepped out from the end of the feeder, and threw my rope. The deer just stood there and stared at me. I wrapped the rope around my waist and twisted the end so I would have a good hold. The deer still just stood and stared at me, but you could tell it was mildly concerned about the whole rope situation. I took a step toward it. It took a step away. I put a little tension on the rope - and received an education.

The first thing that I learned is that while a deer may just stand there looking at you funny while you rope it, they are spurred to action when you start pulling on that rope. That deer EXPLODED!

The second thing I learned is that pound for pound, a deer is a LOT stronger than a cow or a colt. A cow or a colt in that weight range, I could fight down with a rope, with some dignity. A deer, no chance. That thing ran and bucked and twisted and pulled. There was no controlling it, and certainly no getting close to it. As it jerked me off my feet and started dragging me across the ground, it occurred to me that having a deer on a rope was not nearly as good an idea as I originally imagined. The only up-side is that they do not have as much stamina as many animals. A brief 10 minutes later, it was tired, and not nearly as quick to jerk me off my feet and drag me when I managed to get up. It took me a few minutes to realize this, since I was mostly blinded by the blood flowing out of the big gash in my head.

At that point, I had lost my taste for corn-fed venison. I just wanted to get that devil creature off the end of that rope. I figured if I just let it go with the rope hanging around its neck, it would likely die slow and painfully somewhere. At the time, there was no love at all between me and that deer. At that moment, I hated the thing, and I would venture a guess that the feeling was mutual. Despite the gash in my head and the several large knots, where I had cleverly arrested the deer's momentum by bracing my head against various large rocks, as it dragged me across the ground, I could still think clearly enough to recognize that there was a small chance that I shared some tiny amount of responsibility for the situation we were in, so I didn't want the deer to have to suffer a slow death. I managed to get it lined up to back in between my truck and the feeder, a little trap I had set beforehand. Kind of like a squeeze chute. I got it to back in there and started moving up, so I could get my rope back.

Did you know that deer bite? They do! I never in a million years would have thought that a deer would bite somebody, so I was very surprised when I reached up there to grab that rope and the deer grabbed hold of my wrist. Now, when a deer bites you, it is not like being bitten by a horse - where they just bite you, and then let go. A deer bites you and shakes its head, almost like a pit bull. They bite HARD and it hurts. The proper thing to do when a deer bites you is probably to freeze and draw back slowly. I tried screaming and shaking, instead. My method was ineffective. It seems like the deer was biting and shaking for several minutes, but it was likely only several seconds. I, being smarter than a deer (though you may be questioning that claim by now) tricked it. While I kept it busy tearing the hound out of my right arm, I reached up with my left hand and pulled that rope loose.

That was when I got my final lesson in deer behavior for the day.

Deer will strike at you with their front feet. They rear right up on their back feet and strike right about head-and-shoulder level, and their hooves are surprisingly sharp. I learned a long time ago, that when an animal like a horse strikes at you with their hooves, and you can't get away easily, the best thing to do is try to make a loud noise and make an aggressive move towards the animal. This will usually cause them to back down a bit so you can escape. This was not a horse. This was a deer, so obviously, such trickery would not work. In the course of a millisecond, I devised a different strategy. I screamed like a woman, and tried to turn and run.

The reason I had always been told NOT to try to turn and run from a horse that paws at you is that there is a good chance that it will hit you in the back of the head. Deer may not be so different from horses after all, besides being twice as strong, and three times as evil, because the second I turned to run, it hit me right in the back of the head and knocked me down.

Now, when a deer paws at you and knocks you down, it doesn't immediately leave. I suspect it does not recognize that the danger has passed. What they do instead, is paw your back and jump up and down on you while you are lying there crying like a little girl and covering your head.

I finally managed to crawl under the truck and the deer went away.

Maybe it was this:

ilikmunkis:
Your sister wouldn't, by any chance, be from Louisiana?

Nope good ol oregon. I still admit though-it sounds pretty out there....but there a small part of me saying "you know...its crazy-but this just might work"

Well you could set a snare trap with a large log as a couter weight. I think I saw that in an army field manual.

/think I am legend

Un available for comment: http://youtube.com/watch?v=fukfCzoq-PM

Lampmonster: I could kill a bear with an eyelash

I could kill that same bear by spearing it with your eyelash.

Greywar: My sister calls me up the other day. Wants to know what she thinks of her new idea.

See, she has gotten some deer to come up and eat food out of her hand. The image of this is bambi falling in love with the kind helpful human.

So her idea is this-She wants to use a taser on the deer, and then cut its throat while its down. Killing it in a spray of arterial blood that will no doubt look like something from the kill bill movies-with the volume turned down. She can't shoot them because its not hunting season and the neighbors might call the cops over the gunfire,

Genius? insanity? or "hey yall, come watch this!"? Either way I have volunteered to video tape her attempt just in case the deer kicks her ass. I have some hopes she will call me to come video it as soon as she gets a taser gun. I'm almost tempted to get her one just for the possible entertainment value if a deer kicks my sisters ass.


The Aristocrats!!!

//Willow did this in Buffy the Vampire Slayer. She needed the deer's blood to raise Buffy from the dead.....again.

Greywar

Is your sister single?

lol rhelaien: Please if there is a god, let something similar to this happen to my sister while I videotape it.

Don't get me wrong, I love my sister....but having something like that on videotape is priceless.

/A little something for everyone

I would think lone man + rope + woods = suicide. I guess I'm just emo like that.

Greywar: Nope good ol oregon. I still admit though-it sounds pretty out there....but there a small part of me saying "you know...its crazy-but this just might work"

It probably will. When deer get used to a human or humans in general they become pretty trusting. You definitely have to send me that video when she does it.

That deer story was awesome.

I bet Jet Li could do it.

adadkbar93: I would think lone man + rope + woods = suicide. I guess I'm just emo like that.

Lone man + rope + woods = spleunking, in my head. I bet there's CAVES in that there woods...

Wanted for questioning

Lampmonster: I could kill a dear with a string. I'm that badass.
-------------
Yes, I suppose you could kill a dear with a string. But that would get you murder charges. Killing a DEER with a string, well... THAT would take a farkload of effort.

Greek: Lampmonster: I could kill a dear with a string. I'm that badass.
-------------
Yes, I suppose you could kill a dear with a string. But that would get you murder charges. Killing a DEER with a string, well... THAT would take a farkload of effort.

I could make a deer kill & clean a bear with string.

I could kill the bear, stuff it with the deer I already stuffed with a pig, all killed with a pube.

/like turducken, but different

It's called a dragline. Geez, like you guys have never even HEARD of hunting before.

Hey nice pick Idrow, uh see you in a week I guess.

Sounds to me that the guy and his deer "friend" are into bondage.

actually, that guy was hunting beaver not deer

rhelaien: From an otherwise unfetchable website and written by 'an author that would like to remain anonymous' I had this idea that I was going to rope a deer, put it in a stall, feed it up on corn for a couple of weeks, then kill it and eat it.

I put a little tension on the rope - and received an education.
The first thing that I learned is that while a deer may just stand there looking at you funny while you rope it, they are spurred to action when you start pulling on that rope. That deer EXPLODED!
The second thing I learned is that pound for pound, a deer is a LOT stronger than a cow or a colt. A cow or a colt in that weight range, I could fight down with a rope, with some dignity. A deer, no chance. That thing ran and bucked and twisted and pulled. There was no controlling it, and certainly no getting close to it. As it jerked me off my feet and started dragging me across the ground, it occurred to me that having a deer on a rope was not nearly as good an idea as I originally imagined. The only up-side is that they do not have as much stamina as many animals. A brief 10 minutes later, it was tired, and not nearly as quick to jerk me off my feet and drag me when I managed to get up. It took me a few minutes to realize this, since I was mostly blinded by the blood flowing out of the big gash in my head.

Despite the gash in my head and the several large knots, where I had cleverly arrested the deer's momentum by bracing my head against various large rocks, as it dragged me across the ground, I could still think clearly enough to recognize that there was a small chance that I shared some tiny amount of responsibility for the situation we were in...

Did you know that deer bite? They do! I never in a million years would have thought that a deer would bite somebody, so I was very .
HAHAHAHAHA. I guess the douchebag who posted isn't dead, or s/he couldn't have written the posting. But I can't help laughing. They thought a deer was some weeny cartoon critter in a Disney flick, not a large, wild animal who would fight for its life. And they didn't bother with little legal details, like NOT POACHING. Whatever woulds this asshat got were very well deserved.

That last sentence should have said "wounds." My bad.

adadkbar93: I would think lone man + rope + woods = suicide. I guess I'm just emo like that.

The first thing I thought was stalker/serial killer/rapist.. I'm paranoid like that..

Never leave home without some rope, you never know when it might come in handy.

rhelaien, that was hilarious!

This will of course

a) Not be obscure
b) Be corrected by an anal-retentive nerd

/just sayin/
//too soon?

Cornwell: Never leave home without some rope, you never know when it might come in handy.

I am Chris Hanson. Have a seat over there.

Previous victim.

We are so enjoying the deer story.

We never leave home without two (or more) kinds of rope.