A moose once bit my sister

/just getting that out of the way

Unavailable for comment.

Asclepius: A moose once bit my sister

Was she Karving her initials on the moose with the sharpened end of an interspace toothbrush ?

I'm a møøse who is specially trained to mix concrete and sign complicated insurance forms, so I'm really getting a kick out of these replies.

The Onanist: Unavailable for comment.

Did Wassamatta U make a bowl game this year?

I hit a moose with my car in 2007, so I'm really getting a kick out of some of these replies.

/not kidding.
//Just some dents and scratches on the hood.
///Big Guy was watching out for me.

That's why I drive a Volvo.

For the moose, specifically.

We apologize for the fault in the subtitles. Those responsible have been sacked.

We appologise for the fault in subtitles, those responsable have been sacked.

Hey, did anyone see that part from the beginning of Monty Python and the Holy Grail? That would be hilarious if we all quoted it.

/ya arms off
//tim?
///3 sir

hemi cuda: That's why I drive a Volvo.

For the moose, specifically.

Why? Because a Volvo is just the right height to have a big moose body crash through the windshield?

ainamacil: I hit a moose with my car in 2007, so I'm really getting a kick out of some of these replies.

/not kidding.
//Just some dents and scratches on the hood.
///Big Guy was watching out for me.

hit it at less than 5mph?


I mean jesus christ, these things weigh over a thousand pounds

Wi not trei a holiday in Sweeden this yer ?

That's 5 more people than died in terrorist attacks on US soil.

Where is the war on Moose gawdammit?

Yutte Hermsgervørdenbrøtbørda approves.

Nice work there subby.

/Ni!

hankhorsey: Where is the war on Moose gawdammit?

Boris and Natatia have it covered.

No, stop it. This thread is getting too silly.

SAAB "moose test" (new window - pops)

Asclepius: A moose once bit hit my sister

/just getting that out of the way

FTFY

...and nothing is mentioned about the Llama collisions?

"the moose came in second."

My sister once bit a moose...

Dear Sir,
I wish to complain on the stronglyest possible terms about the previous entry in this thread about a møøse collition. Some of my best friends are møøse, and only a FEW of accidents.

Yours faithfully,
Brigadier Sir Charles Arthur Strong, calling an ambulance because a møøse just bit my sister in the middle of traffic.

Run away!

/quack

I'm just wondering how the mooses got drivers licenses.

I still don't think it compares to all the deer collisions you hear about here. Sure, they're smaller, but they really love to jump out in front of cars.

/Børk Børk Børk.

duffblue: hit it at less than 5mph?


I mean jesus christ, these things weigh over a thousand pounds

I figure about 30, 35. Came around a corner on MA Route 8 at night, and there was a damn moose in the road. Hit the brakes, and I was already going slow (it was a 50 zone) around the dark corner, but still. Went up on the hood, rolled off the driver's side windshield. I thought I'd hit somebody's horse.

Good thing it was a female, though, because if it had antlers, the whole damn thing would've been worse. It got up, kinda stared at me like "What the hell, dude?" and ambled off into the woods. Fortunately, I was only about 400 feet from a state police barracks, so I didn't have to go far to report it.

we apologize for the fault in the headline. those responsible for sacking the people who have just been sacked have been sacked.

The thread has been completed in an entirely different style at great expense and at the last minute.

LLAMA (new window)

MarshWoman

A moose test is a type of vehicle safety test designed to simulate the effect of a collision with an animal. The moose test originates in Scandinavia, where large ungulates, or hoofed mammals, often roam the road, posing a serious hazard to motorists. Not all car companies use moose testing, although many Northern European car companies including Saab and Volvo do.

A moose test begins with the moose, which is usually simulated with steel and other strong materials, arranged to be about the size and shape of an adult moose. In a simple moose test, the car will be slammed into the moose at varying rates of speed to see what happens. The goal is for the car to flip the moose over the roof, thereby avoiding penetration of the windshield, although this may still do substantial damage to the car.

/that's why

This is actually a fairly big deal here in New Hampshire. An often-seen bumper sticker reads: "Brake for møøse, it could save your life." One of our former neighbors had a high-speed encounter with a møøse that altered his life radically (not dead, but severely damaged, mostly ok now).

/Yeah, I left in the "øø". It's funny.
//Møøse are quite impressive up close. Like "looking in your living-room window" close.
///When møøses come walking, they walk where they will.

My passenger and I nearly added to this statistic about three months ago... Doing 80mph on the highway at 11:00pm, trying to get to a hotel.

Then there was a moose, standing smack in the middle of my lane.

The rental car had good brakes, or there would have been a lot of mess to clean up.

The_Original_Roxtar: LLAMA (new window)

Oh dear god...

One night 6 months ago or so I was driving between Norway and Lovell Maine on Route 5 which at 10:00 at night is basically deserted. I came over the crest of a hill at 70+ and noticed a black shadow in the road ahead. Instinctively I hit the brakes HARD. I was somehow able to get my S10 stopped within a couple of feet of this large, tick bitten and slightly bored looking moose. He took his time getting off the road simply because he had more important things to do such as chewing cud and examining me.

A few weeks later I was driving down a back road and noticed two moose (meese?) in a swamp. I parked my truck and found a foot trail sticking to the high ground into the swamp. The further I moved into the swamp the more moose I was seeing. I broke into a clearing and gave a final head count. 8 moose grazing in one small area. It was then that I remembered that this was in fact during mating season and that it was in my best to get the fark out of there before I got myself hurt.

/sometimes I wonder how safe the country really is.
//take two, their small

moar funny pictures
there would be less "accidents" if people just co-operated

Asclepius: A moose once bit hit my sister

/just getting that out of the way

is that where she got her knuckles?

Would not hit it. Just look at those sharp knees.

hemi cuda: MarshWoman

A moose test is a type of vehicle safety test....
/that's why

OIC

I came here for the monty python references, i leave feeling happy.

/obscure?

"The plural for moose is moose...just like goose is geese."
"What are you saying...it's meese?"

/impressed

5 is lightweight, in Finland we average about 10 yearly.

And now that I actually read the article, this was just a single state. Nevermind.

/scared of the majestic møøse when on the road
//mobile enough to scavenge, brutal enough to pillage to survive

Wik

Also wik

Maine is roughly the same size as Finland but their moose population is fairly low. Moose hunting has been banned for much of my lifetime.

New Brunswick Moose Alert: http://www.gnb.ca/0113/moose/alert-e.asp
In which you learn that moose avoid capital cities and that French people need more time to read road signs, so they just don't bother.

Here in Ottawa (capital city) moose and bears wander through the suburbs occasionally but they don't come near Parliament Hill. Their instinct is to walk down to the river and disappear. They tend to fall into swimming pools.