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(Chicago Tribune) Spiffy It appears that having sex with underage girls and videotaping said acts may have consequences after all as R. Kelly could finally be put in jail   (chicagotribune.com) divider line 28
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2373 clicks; posted to Music » on 21 Dec 2007 at 10:46 AM   |  Make this a Fark FavoriteFavorite    |   share: Share on OMGTWITTER WEB2.0share on StumbleUponshare on Facebook  more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!

28 Comments   (+0 »)


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kungfu jesus with a side of lime 2007-12-21 12:51:21 PM  
I am shocked, shocked, that the role models, and icons that the media has set up for our youth would set a bad example. First you have that inocent spears girls getting the preggers, and now R Kelly is going to jail. I feel that mainstream society has let down parents, and individuals everywhere. If this keeps up people may be expected to take responsibility for their actions, and that would be unexceptable.

 
Asa Phelps [TotalFark] 2007-12-21 12:59:04 PM  
I think you underestimate how much black people love R. Kelly.

If she didn't want to get peed on, she'd have just moved out of the way!

 
hachijuhachi 2007-12-21 01:02:39 PM  
Asa Phelps: I think you underestimate how much black people love R. Kelly.

If she didn't want to get peed on, she'd have just moved out of the way!


This is what I don't understand. He did some vile things, and still had the support of millions. I'm not blaming it all on black people, but I mean, there was VIDEO PROOF! No allegations. I just don't get it.

 
kungfu jesus with a side of lime 2007-12-21 01:07:48 PM  
it was all camera tricks and special effects

 
shanec2000 2007-12-21 01:13:32 PM  
Trapped in the Prison!

 
Precision Boobery 2007-12-21 02:39:16 PM  
TFA:But Kelly's attorney, Edward Genson, said that until Wednesday Kelly hadn't missed a court date in more than 100 appearances in the 5 1/2-year-old case.

100 appearances? 5 1/2 years? WTF is taking so long to lock up that no-talent piss clown?

Gaughan said he decided on leniency because of the "unintended consequences" of canceling shows, such as disappointing fans and loss of income for venue workers.

But Gaughan did order Kelly to cancel his Jan. 13 show in Hampton, Va., to give him ample time to get back to Chicago for his next court appearance on Jan. 14.

Vincent Gaughan: Spineless Hypocrite of Justice!

Meanwhile, a Chicago woman was charged with contempt of court for photographing Kelly in the courtroom with her cell phone. Jean Johnson of the 5200 block of North Ashland Avenue was ordered held overnight for a Friday hearing.
Pwned.

If you're going to do something heinous,
you had better be rich and famous.
'Cause if you are not
freedom can't be bought.
Then, seriatim in your anus

 
Atomic Spunk 2007-12-21 02:44:02 PM  
Urine some serious trouble.

 
Gavino 2007-12-21 02:44:49 PM  
Hey all he has to do is convince 12 white people that it's not him in the video. I reckon it can be done.

/haven't seen the video.
/REALLY don't want to.

 
hachijuhachi 2007-12-21 02:53:58 PM  
Gavino: Hey all he has to do is convince 12 white people that it's not him in the video. I reckon it can be done.

/haven't seen the video.
/REALLY don't want to.


So you're counting on the "All black people look the same" defense?

 
Superevil [TotalFark] 2007-12-21 03:10:12 PM  
Hey, for all I know that piss was digital.

 
jake_lex [TotalFark] 2007-12-21 03:16:05 PM  
Does this mean we won't be getting Chapters 534 through 702 of "Trapped in the Closet" anytime soon?

/thinks that may be the most batshiat crazy song ever recorded
//or "song sequence", I should say
///whatever you call it, it's farking insane

 
TheNewJesus 2007-12-21 03:18:20 PM  
You make enough money for enough people and you get to do anything. Not only that, but a bunch of slow ass tard-sicle fans will actually pay to see the motherfkucing urinator on stage.

USA! USA! USA!

 
First Post 2007-12-21 03:18:58 PM  
hachijuhachi: This is what I don't understand. He did some vile things, and still had the support of millions.

Cause he good!

 
Gavino 2007-12-21 03:28:42 PM  
hachijuhachi - well, if I was a defence attorney, I'd certainly try it on. He's already said 'it isn't me' hasn't he?

 
busy chillin' 2007-12-21 03:44:50 PM  
jake_lex

Does this mean we won't be getting Chapters 534 through 702 of "Trapped in the Closet" anytime soon?

/thinks that may be the most batshiat crazy song ever recorded
//or "song sequence", I should say
///whatever you call it, it's farking insane


I can't believe I'm going to say this, but you know what, I thought that movie was hilarious. Some parts got monotonous, but then he would hit you with a zinger and it would keep me interested.


/I bought you some pears
//I'm just gonna eat this chicken

 
Bot v2.38beta 2007-12-21 04:19:00 PM  
Boobies

One of the best episodes, that show is great.


/:)
/I typed this with my thumbs
///biatchez love smiley faces

 
Bot v2.38beta 2007-12-21 04:20:20 PM  
Boobies

Damn your handle

 
Ebenator 2007-12-21 04:57:50 PM  
Damn right he shouldn't go to jail. This is a cultural difference and condemning it would be racist.

 
pvd021 2007-12-21 06:47:01 PM  
I wonder if his song "Flirt" will be playing while he's being raped in prison.

Prisoners hate child molestors, and he's definitely a pervert to that degree.

 
JohnnyDreamboat 2007-12-21 06:48:40 PM  
Asa Phelps: I think you underestimate how much black people love R. Kelly. OJ

If she didn't want to get peed on her head cut off in an alley, she'd have just moved out of the way!

FTFY

 
Guntram Shatterhand 2007-12-21 10:04:16 PM  
My question: was Adam West his attorney?

 
socodog 2007-12-22 12:04:02 AM  
i15.tinypic.com


[intro]
Yeah. 40 oz. of malt liquor mmake me want to tell you somethin'.

(verse 1)
Rollin round, sittin on dubs. Countin the hours, was high on shrubs.
Coolin in my Escalade. Man I'm paid, I got it made!
Take me to your special place. Close your eyes, show me your face.
I'm gonna piss on it!

(chorus)
Haters wanna hate, lovers wanna love. I don't even want none of the above.
I want to piss on you! Yes I do. I'll piss on you; I'll pee on you.

(verse 2)
your body, your body is a Porta-Potty.
And my pee I'd kick; like it know's karate. (knows karate)
i'm gonna pee on you. drip drip drip pee on you.pisss on you piss on you.
And you'll never fell quite the same once u take a whiff of my Hershey stains.
I want to poop on u too. I want to pee in your food.
Only thing that make my life complete is when I turn your face into a toilet seat.
i want to pee on you yes i do. i want to pee on you i want to piss on you

(chorus)
wont you braid my hair won't you braid my hair.
Before we start, I'm gonna fart. I'm gonna fart on you.

 
JohnnyDreamboat 2007-12-22 04:22:17 AM  
I retract my earlier posting. Had I been aware of the majestic ability of this man, I would not have jumped in on the "make fun of the rapper who is known to urinate on underage women (and videotape it)" bandwagon.
/My bad
//Don't taze or pee on me, bro

 
dereksmalls 2007-12-22 04:24:41 AM  
good thing Jimmy Page didn't have a video camera running , around 1971, at the Experience Club, Riot House or Rodney Bingenheimer's club.
or Chuck Berry.

girl; kiss me , Chuck
Chuck; why should I kiss you? you smell like piss

 
PinkyPinkerton 2007-12-22 11:05:32 AM  
socodog:

[intro]
Yeah. 40 oz. of malt liquor mmake me want to tell you somethin'.

(verse 1)
Rollin round, sittin on dubs. Countin the hours, was high on shrubs.
Coolin in my Escalade. Man I'm paid, I got it made!
Take me to your special place. Close your eyes, show me your face.
I'm gonna piss on it!

(chorus)
Haters wanna hate, lovers wanna love. I don't even want none of the above.
I want to piss on you! Yes I do. I'll piss on you; I'll pee on you.

(verse 2)
your body, your body is a Porta-Potty.
And my pee I'd kick; like it know's karate. (knows karate)
i'm gonna pee on you. drip drip drip pee on you.pisss on you piss on you.
And you'll never fell quite the same once u take a whiff of my Hershey stains.
I want to poop on u too. I want to pee in your food.
Only thing that make my life complete is when I turn your face into a toilet seat.
i want to pee on you yes i do. i want to pee on you i want to piss on you

(chorus)
wont you braid my hair won't you braid my hair.
Before we start, I'm gonna fart. I'm gonna fart on you.


This is an actual song?

Mouthbreathing cretin. Kill it with fire!

img160.imageshack.us
/not mine

 
vegas_greaser 2007-12-22 01:23:23 PM  
What I always wondered was since all the "rappers" have the money to buy expensive cars, jewelry, etc, why do they still drink Malt Liquor? Must be that Vintage malt liquor.

/'93 was a good year for Old English
//But not Stroh's..that's ghetto, man!

socodog: [intro]
Yeah. 40 oz. of malt liquor mmake me want to tell you somethin'.

(verse 1)
Rollin round, sittin on dubs. Countin the hours, was high on shrubs.
Coolin in my Escalade. Man I'm paid, I got it made!
Take me to your special place. Close your eyes, show me your face.
I'm gonna piss on it!

(chorus)
Haters wanna hate, lovers wanna love. I don't even want none of the above.
I want to piss on you! Yes I do. I'll piss on you; I'll pee on you.

(verse 2)
your body, your body is a Porta-Potty.
And my pee I'd kick; like it know's karate. (knows karate)
i'm gonna pee on you. drip drip drip pee on you.pisss on you piss on you.
And you'll never fell quite the same once u take a whiff of my Hershey stains.
I want to poop on u too. I want to pee in your food.
Only thing that make my life complete is when I turn your face into a toilet seat.
i want to pee on you yes i do. i want to pee on you i want to piss on you

(chorus)
wont you braid my hair won't you braid my hair.
Before we start, I'm gonna fart. I'm gonna fart on you.

 
Raug the Dwarf 2007-12-24 10:16:07 AM  
PinkyPinkerton:

Chappelle Show after the R. Kelly tape first broke. That's the "Gonna Piss on You" song done to the tune of Ignition. Chappelle even has the follow up...

This is the Remix edition
of the song about pissin'....

 
kidddynamite 2007-12-26 11:53:14 AM  
R. Kelly's Doodoo Butter

 
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