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(WESH) Scary "There's no reason to become alarmed, and we hope you'll enjoy the rest of your flight. By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?"   (wesh.com) divider line 156
More: Scary  
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26480 clicks; posted to Main » on 16 Dec 2007 at 7:04 PM   |  Make this a Fark FavoriteFavorite    |   share: Share on OMGTWITTER WEB2.0share on StumbleUponshare on Facebook  more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!

156 Comments   (+0 »)


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Lundah [TotalFark] 2007-12-16 01:21:39 PM  
www.nba.com
Not available for comment.

 
Brodan [TotalFark] 2007-12-16 01:32:42 PM  
img117.imageshack.us

 
olavf [TotalFark] 2007-12-16 01:40:07 PM  
Shouldn't have had the fish.

 
Smell the Glove [TotalFark] 2007-12-16 01:41:27 PM  
Or maybe they just landed the plane and described feelings of nausea and dizziness.

Actual headline: American Airlines Crew Gets Sick After Flight

 
Julieahni [TotalFark] 2007-12-16 01:49:49 PM  
Excuse me stewardess. I speak jive.

 
Sarah Jessica Farker [recently expired TotalFark] 2007-12-16 01:53:22 PM  
I saw them do this on Mythbusters just yesterday. both Adam and Jamie flew a passenger jet simulator at NASA, first with no help at all, and second, with an air traffic controller talking them down.

by themselves, they both crashed horribly.

with the ATC talking, they both landed safely.

but they said that this has never actually happened, at least not at the time they made the episode.

 
Asa Phelps [TotalFark] 2007-12-16 01:55:16 PM  
looks like i picked the wrong day to stop sniffing glue

 
ultrachronic 2007-12-16 02:08:32 PM  
Just came in here for the Airplane references.

img230.imageshack.us

/should've let Otto take over.

 
House of Tards [TotalFark] 2007-12-16 02:20:53 PM  
Over Macho Grande?

 
Sir Cumference the Flatulent [TotalFark] 2007-12-16 02:33:51 PM  
House of Tards: Over Macho Grande?

I'll never get over Macho Grande.

 
AntiNorm [TotalFark] 2007-12-16 03:30:27 PM  
That's what you get for flying American.

/flying Delta tomorrow. it's not much better.

 
Julieahni [TotalFark] 2007-12-16 03:45:31 PM  
I just want to tell you both good luck. We're all counting on you.

 
Fluff Girl [TotalFark] 2007-12-16 04:09:30 PM  
Ah, I remember. I had the lasagna.

 
Mr Tumnus [TotalFark] 2007-12-16 04:26:39 PM  
Surely you can't be serious.

/I am serious.
/And don't call me Shirley.

 
lordargent 2007-12-16 04:37:51 PM  
Sarah Jessica Farker: but they said that this has never actually happened, at least not at the time they made the episode.

They were saying that the autopilot of today is so advanced that you can punch in a few numbers and it would fly to its destination and land the plane itself.

 
wyltoknow [TotalFark] 2007-12-16 04:58:00 PM  
The white zone is for the immediate loading and unloading of passengers only. There is no stopping in the red zone.

 
clgrin 2007-12-16 05:24:04 PM  
"Oh no!... one of the passengers is sick! Does anyone in the crew know how to sit pensively and complain?"

 
Grote-Man [TotalFark] 2007-12-16 06:03:48 PM  
The red zone is for the immediate loading and unloading of passengers only. There is no stopping in the white zone.

 
House of Tards [TotalFark] 2007-12-16 06:07:32 PM  
Don't you tell me which zone is for loading, and which zone is for unloading.

 
Julieahni [TotalFark] 2007-12-16 06:41:21 PM  
Don't start up with your white zone shiat again. There's just no stopping in a white zone.

 
wxboy 2007-12-16 07:08:43 PM  
lordargent: Sarah Jessica Farker: but they said that this has never actually happened, at least not at the time they made the episode.

They were saying that the autopilot of today is so advanced that you can punch in a few numbers and it would fly to its destination and land the plane itself.


That's not really true. You can use autopilot to get you near the runway, but it's not accurate enough to get the plane safely on the ground.

 
djslowdive 2007-12-16 07:09:28 PM  
You want me to have an abortion.

 
The Grinch 2007-12-16 07:10:24 PM  
Its really the only sensible thing to do. If its done
properly, therapeutically, there's no danger involved.

 
kilgorn 2007-12-16 07:11:26 PM  
Another one... so soon?...eats taco...not fish...

 
chewy7097 [TotalFark] 2007-12-16 07:11:38 PM  
There's a sale at Penny's!

 
Hack Patooey 2007-12-16 07:12:40 PM  
Fluff Girl: Ah, I remember. I had the lasagna.

Damnit I came here to say that!

/shakes fist

 
black_knight 2007-12-16 07:13:40 PM  
I hope they were flying on instruments...
content.answers.com

 
kilgorn 2007-12-16 07:13:49 PM  
Inspectors with Broward Sheriff's Fire-Rescue also examined the plane

The Boys Downtown aren't going to like that...

 
Stile4aly 2007-12-16 07:16:09 PM  
The fog's getting thicker

And Leon's getting Laaaaarger!

 
theoneontheleft 2007-12-16 07:16:20 PM  
How would an exhaust problem only affect the crew?

 
WRX_Smokescreen 2007-12-16 07:16:23 PM  
i5.photobucket.com

 
I_Approve_Of_This_Message 2007-12-16 07:16:35 PM  
It's a different kind of plane, altogether!

 
gimmechocolate 2007-12-16 07:16:47 PM  
I'm flying to my family's for Christmas.
My fears of crashing I wish I could dismiss.
Will I die if I refuse
To take off my shoes?
How 'bout I stay home and drink Swiss Miss?

 
lollygaggers! 2007-12-16 07:20:17 PM  
"Miss, are you tell us everything?"

"Well, we are out of coffee".

"AAauuuugghhh!!!!"

 
simpsonfan 2007-12-16 07:22:25 PM  
If a passenger had to fly the plane, the pilot's union would have a fit.

 
shlabotnik 2007-12-16 07:26:07 PM  
It's Lieutenant Hurwitz. Severe shell-shock. Thinks he's Ethel Merman.

/war is hell

 
studebaker hoch 2007-12-16 07:26:44 PM  
I know one! I know one! Pick me pick me!

 
JakeElwood 2007-12-16 07:27:54 PM  
Controller #1: "They're screwed!"

Controller #2: "They're dead."

Johnny: "Did I leave the iron on...?"

 
CoRrUpTeDbUdGiE 2007-12-16 07:31:23 PM  
Never mind what happened... *opens drawer on dvd player and puts in 'Airplane!' dvd*

/needed that

 
mikesup 2007-12-16 07:32:15 PM  
wxboy: lordargent: Sarah Jessica Farker: but they said that this has never actually happened, at least not at the time they made the episode.

They were saying that the autopilot of today is so advanced that you can punch in a few numbers and it would fly to its destination and land the plane itself.

That's not really true. You can use autopilot to get you near the runway, but it's not accurate enough to get the plane safely on the ground.


Actually, most of the modern airliners are capable of what is known as a "Category IIIC ILS (Instrument Landing System)" or as pilots call it "Auto-land". Basically, the aircraft flies the approach to 200 feet above the ground using only the ILS signal for course and altitude, then because the altitude information from an ILS becomes way to sensitive as you approach the receiver near the runway, the aircraft takes over using various sensors. These include radio altimeter and inertial navigation systems. Basically from 200 feet down to the runway, the aircraft comes down at about 200 feet a minute and uses the radio altimeter to know it's "wheel height" or the height the main wheels are off the ground. Using course guidance from the ILS system, the aircraft will maintain centerline all the way through the roll out. Once on the ground, the crew can either manually brake the aircraft and deploy thrust reversers, or if the aircraft is equipped with auto-brakes and auto-throttle, the aircraft will stop itself.
This system was developed in the 70's for airports that usually get fogged in like London's Heathrow and San Francisco International, it is now used at major hubs, but only when needed as it requires a greater distance between aircraft for safety, this means less aircraft arriving and departing and more delays. Most of the time you land at an airport, you will be brought in on a Category II system, this is accurate to 100 feet above the ground, from that point the flight crew manually lands the aircraft. That is why airline landings suck, the pilot's actually landed it.

theoneontheleft, I doubt the reporter got it right, seeing as how they called it fuel from a generator. Well, the flight generators are powered by the engines themselves, they're "fuel" is air off the compressor stage of the engine. On the ground, a mini-jet engine in the tail called an APU provides power to the aircraft so the main engines don't have to run when it is on the ramp or at the gate. This uses Jet A fuel from the wing fuel tanks. I work around Jet A, while it smells like petroleum, it has little vapor and has never made me sick from being around it. My bet is that the aircraft had a pressurization leak in the AC system as that would allow the higher ozone levels at altitude into the cabin and cause sickness, but that would affect the crew. The only other thing that might have happened that would have a reporter call it a generator would be avionics cooling problems that leaked into the cockpit area, but I fail to see that affecting the stewardesses in the back. Honestly, it doesn't make a bit of sense, IMO it is another case of stupid reporter. Seeing as this is from Florida, I would go with that hypothesis.

 
Tax Boy 2007-12-16 07:32:37 PM  
Do you like movies about gladiators?

 
skinink 2007-12-16 07:32:43 PM  

"It was unclear if anyone was taken to the hospital."


A hospital? What is it?


 
mark12A 2007-12-16 07:33:35 PM  
I know if you have to fly the plane you get double frequent flyer miles

/pilot
//if the plane has cat IIIA avionics, it can land itself. All you have to do is push the brakes after touchdown

 
wxboy 2007-12-16 07:34:29 PM  
skinink: "It was unclear if anyone was taken to the hospital."
A hospital? What is it?


It's a big building with patients, but that's not important right now.

 
give me doughnuts [TotalFark] 2007-12-16 07:35:24 PM  
skinink: "It was unclear if anyone was taken to the hospital."

A hospital? What is it?


A big building with patients, but that's not important right now.

 
shinjitsuism 2007-12-16 07:36:02 PM  
www.worldhum.com

Striker, have you ever flown a multi-engine plane before?

\No, never.
\\Shiat. It's a God damn waste of time. There's no way he can land this plane.

 
give me doughnuts [TotalFark] 2007-12-16 07:36:21 PM  
give me doughnuts: skinink: "It was unclear if anyone was taken to the hospital."

A hospital? What is it?

A big building with patients, but that's not important right now.


55 seconds! Curse you wxboy!

 
Feldspar Q. Walrustitty 2007-12-16 07:37:15 PM  
I just wanted to tell you both good luck, we're all counting on you.

 
Arthur Two Sheds Jackson 2007-12-16 07:38:10 PM  
I say hey sky, s'other say I won say I pray to J I get
the same ol' same ol.

 
Rat [TotalFark] 2007-12-16 07:41:17 PM  
Ted Striker: My orders came through. My squadron ships out tomorrow. We're bombing the storage depots at Daiquiri at 1800 hours. We're coming in from the north, below their radar.
Elaine Dickinson: When will you be back?
Ted Striker: I can't tell you that. It's classified.

©

 
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