Teaching 1st graders has to mess you up...I don't blame the poor teacher one bit.

What's the best part about twenty six-year-olds?

/Doesn't really work in written format.

Sometimes the best examples are the worst examples. She should get tenure. I'd bet most of her students would grow up to be responsible drinkers.

Have you ever been on an elementary school field trip? The third grade trip to the fish hatchery is legend in my house. I only wish I'd had the forethought to drink heavily enough to pass out, and I was only a parent volunteer!

Teachers, I admire your dedication. My son has had some really outstanding teachers who have demonstrated the patience of Job--I don't know how they do it.

Insert funny but very dirty joke with punchline "There are twenty of them!" here.

deadapostle: What's the best part about twenty six-year-olds?

Never mind; I see I'm not needed here.

Dallymo: Have you ever been on an elementary school field trip? The third grade trip to the fish hatchery is legend in my house. I only wish I'd had the forethought to drink heavily enough to pass out, and I was only a parent volunteer!

Teachers, I admire your dedication. My son has had some really outstanding teachers who have demonstrated the patience of Job--I don't know how they do it.

Heavy drinking? Drugs maybe? Both?

Ha! Wimp. When I was in grade school there were 35-40 kids in a class.

I was a Cub Scout Den Leader for a few years. I understand completely.

/and that was only for a couple of hours one night a week

How else are you expected to deal with 20 six-year-olds?

Stoned to the bajeebus?

I don't see anything unusual about this behavior.

not impressed

Well, did she have a signed permission slip to do all that?

Does it even mention a gender in the article?

I_Can't_Believe_it's_not_Boutros: Well, did she have a signed permission slip to do all that?

She forged her mom's signature.

I used to work with 6-year-olds on a daily basis, so I'm getting a kick out of these replies... (And kind of understand.)

/Day camp counselor is a great job if you can afford the summer off
//Get paid to go to arts and crafts, archery and hit on the lifeguards
///Kinda miss it. :(

Interrupted Infinitum She forged her mom's signature.

I found a couple practice forgeries hidden in my folks house since 9th grade. Had my dad's signature down.

Finally, a headline that's actually somewhere in or approaching the TA-DA! range and subby swings and misses.

/Hell of a day at the office

NeauxFear: Insert funny but very dirty joke with punchline "There are twenty of them!" here.

deadapostle: What's the best part about twenty six-year-olds?

Never mind; I see I'm not needed here.

I came in here to make that same joke. On Fark, you gotta wake up pretty early...

You can use a 30 round magazine on these, so even if you miss on a few shots you can still deal with the problem

She's also looking to try out for mother of the year

FTFA: A judge ordered the educator to stay away from alcohol after police found the teacher's child waiting in a car outside a bar.

There's also a charge of DUI, and the latest -- a hit and run and reckless endangerment charges from early this year.

Mom?


/had to be done

how do you make a 6 year old girl cry twice?

/nevermind

....link....useless....no photo....

It is easy to handle youngsters. You just need the properly equipment.

/BabyCage.net FTW!!

How else are you expected to deal with 20 six-year-olds?

Lots of duct tape.

deadapostle: What's the best part about twenty six-year-olds?

/Doesn't really work in written format.
WIN
This thread was over before it even began..
Or more accurately shortly after the beginning.

You know what the best part about twenty six-year-old boys is?

There's twenty of them!!!

Onelith is right - no mention of gender. Which kind of leads me to suspect it's a male, since mentioning gender would narrow it down greatly in that case.

Unless, of course, gender was unidentifiable...

"Witnesses reported seeing the teacher vomit on a field trip and then leave first-graders to wander through a corn maze by themselves"

Wait, what? I challenge whoever wrote this biased nonsense to follow 20 six year olds through a corn maze. I distinctly remember being in gradeschool and wondering around a corn maze unsupervised. Can someone please explain to me when everyone under 18 became retarded?

Now if the teacher was driving the bus...

Well, at least she didn't have sex with her students...even though she was drunk and, therefore, had a "legitimate" excuse!

So, laugh if you will, I guess this makes here a bona-fide "Teacher of the Year" by default, if you ask me.

/And, yes, I'm aware that you didn't.
//Half of my kids' teachers are great.
///Half of them aren't, so results are average for the general population...go figure.

The extremely low standards for teachers under the "no child left behind" plan, leaves us with teachers who are drunk and rape our children, not to mention under-educated. And if that's not enough we pay excellent teachers the same salaries as poor ones. Our most intelligent teachers leave because there is no incentive to stay.

I've seen excellent teachers, but not many!

Raise the standards for our teachers and raise the standards for our children. If we don't we are leaving the next generations with disasterous environmental and financial ruin, without the education to get themselves out of it.

I'll ask again, does anyone see where it mentions the teacher is a woman? It might, but I don't see it.

I didn't encounter any alcoholic teachers until high school. Deprived childhood?

Onelith: Does it even mention a gender in the article?

I noticed the same thing and was amazed that such a long article could remain so elusive about gender.

Hero tag strangely missing...

I am sure there are two sides to this story.

Mom?

So, did anybody else read "vomits on children" at first glance?

angryatgwb: The extremely low standards for teachers under the "no child left behind" plan, leaves us with teachers who are drunk and rape our children, not to mention under-educated. And if that's not enough we pay excellent teachers the same salaries as poor ones. Our most intelligent teachers leave because there is no incentive to stay.

I've seen excellent teachers, but not many!

Raise the standards for our teachers and raise the standards for our children. If we don't we are leaving the next generations with disasterous environmental and financial ruin, without the education to get themselves out of it.

This is overblown. I'm a teacher from a family of teachers, and I have two elementary school age kids in public school. There are always a few deadweight teachers in each district, a few flakes, and an occasional perv, but most teachers are dedicated professionals doing an extremely difficult job and often paying for supplies out of their own meager salaries.

They do their best to make sure kids are learning what they are supposed to learn, and are behaving in a manner that allows the classroom to run as smoothly as possible, and they often do this with parents and administrators questioning and confronting them every step of the way. Yet they still come to work each morning and do the best job they possibly can, and they still care about their students.

There could definitely be improvements in education, but you are doing a disservice to the profession to characterize most teachers as under-educated drunks and rapists.

Oznog: You know what the best part about twenty six-year-old boys is?

There's twenty of them!!!

We could have done without the MJ pics. That makes me vomit, no alcohol needed. Of course, I suppose it's a step up from the vomit ones the school bus driver may or may not have of the teacher.

angryatgwb: The extremely low standards for teachers under the "no child left behind" plan, leaves us with teachers who are drunk and rape our children, not to mention under-educated. And if that's not enough we pay excellent teachers the same salaries as poor ones. Our most intelligent teachers leave because there is no incentive to stay.

I've seen excellent teachers, but not many!

Raise the standards for our teachers and raise the standards for our children. If we don't we are leaving the next generations with disasterous environmental and financial ruin, without the education to get themselves out of it.

Looks at username, reads post, back to username, check. yep, troll. Throw in things like "environmental" and "financial ruin" for people that aren't even born yet.

2/10. It's been tried already.

And what do you call the act?

Onelith: Does it even mention a gender in the article?

Not in this article but if you search the site that the story is on the first article is about the same teacher quote:

WAPATO -- A Wapato teacher may have ended a long-time career after parents, teachers and students believed she may have put her class at-risk.

A couple sources close to the Wapato school district told Action News about a first grade teacher at Camas Elementary in Wapato was put on paid-leave.

The Aristocrats!!

Wapato=Yakima Indian Reservation. Not saying she's a drunk Native American, that's just where the town is. And it's in the middle of farking nowhwere. Yakima is the closest "big city" if you can call 65,000 big. Isolation and 20 6-year olds might make anyone of us become alcoholics.

/A good friend's sister lives there. On the Rez.
//No it's not good times on the Rez.

Ya know, kids are pretty smart. They understand that the power dynamic is basically in their favor, in these times. I'm not a teacher, but as a latent pedo soccer coach, home-school dad, ex-neighborhood bon-vivant, schoolyard quarterback, attendee to more than my share of field-trips, I am impressed with their knowledge of affairs. I've heard 'em issue sexual slurs against their peers at frightfully young ages which required a level of sophistication to which I can only aspire. They know how to manipulate. It is hard to obtain/maintain their respect.
Its gotta be nearly uniquely stressful to be a teacher, nowadays. Probably, if one is to go about it 'enhanced,' pills would be the more surreptitious avenue. While I'm just kiddin' about bein' a diddler manque, I can't imagine the level of fortitude it would take to attempt this job. Nearly everyone I know who has tried it has quit after a year. I don't have a point here, just free-associating, but we are in a truly cynical epoch. Another problem would be trying to compensate for the widely differing home-lives kids have nowadays, even in bourgeoisie prefects. Some parents are sociopathic, how does one discipline their child? I cannot imagine a more fraught circumstance in terms of the range of clients. I just guess one has to be born to it. If one was a really charismatic individual, I could see pulling it off, but, otherwise, once things started to deteriorate, recovery would seem to be a difficult propositon.

That's what you get with unionized labor.

A police handout photo shows a German police officer standing beside a handcuffed teacher inside a school in the western town of Saerbeck November 23, 2007. A German policeman handcuffed a primary school teacher to show her class of six- and seven-year olds how he would make an arrest -- and then discovered he had left the keys at home. "The children applauded, and the teacher thought it was all part of the lesson, so she went along with it," a police statement said. Eventually another officer arrived with a bunch of keys. Only then did the teacher realise that anything had gone wrong.
From Reuters but I can't link to the direct entry so putting it here!