no candy for prudes

Great. Now I'll be seen as a pedo because I don't like kids ringing my doorbell and trying to extort candy from me.

AndreMA: Great. Now I'll be seen as a pedo because I don't like kids ringing my doorbell and trying to extort candy from me.

No. You'll be seen as a prude that's too cheap to share in the fun.

...and the next morning you'll be seen as the person cleaning the egg off of your car and house.

LaChanz: AndreMA: Great. Now I'll be seen as a pedo because I don't like kids ringing my doorbell and trying to extort candy from me.

No. You'll be seen as a prude that's too cheap to share in the fun.

Yes, that's precisely why I donate funds each year to support hayrides for the local disadvantaged kids.

Or maybe I don't think teaching kids to accept candy from strangers is the best idea in the world: a number of years ago we had the usual scares of razor blades in apples and so forth -- turned out to be groundless, but I really don't want the cops pounding on my door at 4AM November 1 because some sicko gave out tainted candy of the same brand I happened to give out and little Johnny naturally couldn't recall which Snickers bar came from which house.

LaChanz: ...and the next morning you'll be seen as the person cleaning the egg off of your car and house.

So you agree that it does amount to extortion. Nice lesson for the kiddies: if you threaten to engage in vandalism, you can make people give you things.

turned out to be groundless

And you, like so many others, over-react. It's a fun kids holiday and I had fun trick or treating as a kid and I'll let my kid have the same experience. Sure the world is a different place nowadays, so my kid won't be out there alone and will only eat what we've inspected. I'm 43 and the razor in the apple and needle in the candy bar was there when I was little. Dont blame your not wanting to be bothered on- kids ringing my doorbell and trying to extort candy from me.

AndreMA: So you agree that it does amount to extortion.

Nope. That would probably be me throwing the eggs.

Viginia?


Boys have a penis. Maryland has viginia.

There is one thing I like about Halloween, and that's watching the fundies get apoplectic about the "pagan holiday" and so forth.

It's also an excellent night for older teens and adults to engage in convenience store holdups -- when else would a costume on the street (which can be quickly removed) pass unnoticed?

Eh. I'm 46, LaChanz, so get off my lawn. And take your eggs with you.

/I kid

Now I'm a "fundie" supporting pagan holidays. I've been on Fark for over 6 years and that's a first. It's all about, (I'll go slow now)
The kids having fun. Not convenience store hold ups. Not you.
Everything you've argued so far is how it inconveniences you. So, shut off your lights and hide in the living room swearing at the little kiddies walking by laughing all you want. Don't blame the kids or Halloween for you stinginess and paranoia.

/ I could go on all day but I must go to work. I'm sure we've started what should be a good discussion.

LaChanz: Now I'm a "fundie" supporting pagan holidays. I've been on Fark for over 6 years and that's a first. It's all about, (I'll go slow now)
The kids having fun. Not convenience store hold ups. Not you.
Everything you've argued so far is how it inconveniences you. So, shut off your lights and hide in the living room swearing at the little kiddies walking by laughing all you want. Don't blame the kids or Halloween for you stinginess and paranoia.

/ I could go on all day but I must go to work. I'm sure we've started what should be a good discussion.

Uh, I never labeled you a fundie... I was saying that (a subset of) fundamentalist Christians see Halloween as "devil worship" and similar nonsense. That clearly doesn't apply to you; we can probably agree that they're batshiat crazy.

While it probably did start as a simple and innocent holiday for children, it's changed into something not so benign. Ask any resident of Detroit about "Devils NIght"

Maryland "asks" sex offenders...

A. Pretty please B. Simon says C. Taser demonstration

As an officer of the Union of Window Washers, as well as a member of the Association of Aluminum Siding Repairmen, I highly encourage everyone to give out religious tracts and pennies, rather than candy, to trick-or-treaters.

I'm all for tough sentences for sex offenders and vigorously prosecuting them, but it seems to me that most legislation dealing with sex offenders these days is just dreaming up ways of farking with them and embarrassing them.

DrFong: I'm all for tough sentences for sex offenders and vigorously prosecuting them, but it seems to me that most legislation dealing with sex offenders these days is just dreaming up ways of farking with them and embarrassing them.

They should all be made to wear a big SO on their cloths so we know who they are and what they did. Preferably in a color that really stands out, maybe a shade of red or something...

Where the hell is "Viginia"?

Where the hell is "Viginia"?

The hole next to the anus.

Broktun: Where the hell is "Viginia"?

The hole next to the anus.

THIS

Elvis_Bogart

Where the hell is "Viginia"?

You see, when a man loves a woman very much...

I always put out a sign that says "free anal exams." I'm usually left alone on Halloween. Usually.

Wouldn't it be easier for all parties involved, sex offenders and cheapskates alike, to just post signs saying "Sex offender inside!"

This would also make it easier on sex offenders, knowing that any kid ringing his or hers doorbell, wanted to come inside and see what was in the candybag.

I'm a sex offender, and I'm getting a real kick out of these replies. And by "kick" I mean erection, and "these replies" I mean "little boys."

DrFong

I'm all for tough sentences for sex offenders and vigorously prosecuting them but it seems to me that most legislation dealing with sex offenders these days is just dreaming up ways of farking with them and embarrassing them.

...and having the side effect of making sure that they can't pursue normal lives after the punishment (however that has been determined) has been served. Which makes them more likely to re-offend in future.

Newsflash for legislators: it's actually much harder to remove every single opportunity to re-offend from a determined criminal, than it is to prevent them from wanting to re-offend in the first place. However, as attempts at the former are more headline-grabbing, we'll continue to try to work that system for the foreseeable future.

Stuart

I smell a practical joke!

Can I at least leave a mint on their pillow?

Actually, since a very significant % of pedophiles prey on people under their care, this works as well as locking them in parole offices overnight.

Most pedos don't prey on strangers children. That is a minute % of cases. And for Halloween we (as a society) have done a wonderful job of getting parents to watch over groups of children.

Perhaps the pedo's caseworkers need to set up a conference call and make sure they stay in touch, if they are so worried.

/Hopes mental healthcare extends to the point where we can really help them
//But not a Clockwork Orange

There's not a single documented case of a razor blade ever being found in an apple.

Suck it, wowsers.

now every is going to know who the sex offenders are in the neighborhood because they all will have the same sign.

DrFong
I'm all for tough sentences for sex offenders and vigorously prosecuting them, but it seems to me that most legislation dealing with sex offenders these days is just dreaming up ways of farking with them and embarrassing them.

If sex offenders are still considered to be so dangerous that they have to abide by more rules and regulations than murderers do when they get out of jail, then perhaps we should be keeping sex offenders in jail longer.

Plumbledum:
There's not a single documented case of a razor blade ever being found in an apple.

Hmmm, we can fix that...

Gonna have to tell the asshat neighbors that the best candy for their kids/teenaged pieces of shiat is to be had in the nearby neighborhood. Go vandalize their property, ya little farks.

/Hates Hallowe'en.

Not only do they have to post the signs, but they can't decorate or do anything that could be seen as attracting children to their homes. The problem--a lot of people here in Baltimore (I actually live in AA County, but it still holds true) decorate with purple lights during football season as support for the Ravens, and what's to stop a SO, or someone who lives there, from being a Ravens fan, therefore getting a visit from the local cops for his "Halloween" decorations.

/Ravens purple rain slashie

Will the state provide the signs? Because I see pranking potential here.

Plumbledum: There's not a single documented case of a razor blade ever being found in an apple.

Suck it, wowsers.

A needle was found in a halloween apple that was collected up by my pal Professor Mike circa 1975 in Germantown Maryland.

/sad.

There's not a single documented case of a razor blade ever being found in an apple.

That's because the kids save them to throw at the houses giving out fruit when their little chubby faces want a Mars bar. I have a fun policy for Halloween. Kids with costumes get candy. The older kids who show up with a half-assed costume get to choose their prize from a bowl of green beans and squash picked from my garden. And yes, there are razor blades hidden in the beans.

Where's my pitchfork?

I guess they have put their ice cream trucks in the garage too.

The older kids who show up with a half-assed costume get to choose their prize from a bowl of green beans and squash picked from my garden. And yes, there are razor blades hidden in the beans.

I tell those kids that one piece of candy in the bowl has been poisoned, and can they guess which piece it is. Trick or treat!

Elvis_Bogart: Where the hell is "Viginia"?

Next to Pennsylvanalya.

AndreMA:

Or maybe I don't think teaching kids to accept candy from strangers is the best idea in the world: a number of years ago we had the usual scares of razor blades in apples and so forth -- turned out to be groundless, but I really don't want the cops pounding on my door at 4AM November 1 because some sicko gave out tainted candy of the same brand I happened to give out and little Johnny naturally couldn't recall which Snickers bar came from which house.

That's a hell of a batch of fear to live your life in, Lou.

submitter: and for Viginia to respect it in the morning

I see what you did there, Subby.

/commonwealth of viginia indeed

Prank Call of Cthulhu:

I'm a sex offender, and I'm getting a real kick out of these replies. And by "kick" I mean erection, and "these replies" I mean "little boys."

Priest much?

Plumbledum: There's not a single documented case of a razor blade ever being found in an apple.

*brings up to do list in word

AndreMA: Nice lesson for the kiddies: if you threaten to engage in vandalism, you can make people give you things.

Worked for us in Iraq...

I haven't given out candy in 6 years.

I put a flyer up on my door for the haunted house and go volunteer.

The parks system gets the ticket money, and I get the good feeling of volunteering.

The fact that it is the best haunted house in the state helps.

The fact that the haunted house is a permanent structure helps the quality. 11 months to build, 1 month to run, makes for a great freaking haunted house.

www.panicpark.org

Me, I live alone with a black cat in an apartment complex filled with children. Halloween, I'm going to be at my dad's place with some friends. I figure that's better than staying home and having to endure the never ending knocking on my door, or giving out candy, some over protective soccermom noticing that I'm a male who lives alone handing out candy and instantly assume that I'm some sex predator and worse when they notice the pagan/wiccan stuff in my apartment and the black cat that I've had for the past 10 years.

DulceEtDecorumEst: Link please? Tainted candy is the biggest urban myth ever. You fail. I bet the friend of your cousin, had an uncle who worked with this guy, who told you a story he heard this one time.

I enjoy watching people piling on humorless folk as much as the next Farkette, but he did say that the scares "turned out to be groundless." (Like they always do.)

Some people just don't like Halloween. It's okay, really.