What the article fails to mention is that King Alfred went on to cause the lesser known ninth century chamberpot disaster after falling asleep at the helm that very same night.

My family used to have a cat named Ragnar Hairypants.

It's a family tradition to name our cats after historical people.

Let them eat burnt cake.

Ragnar Hairybreeks

thats my fark login

University of Leeds professor Rory McTurk says the tale of Alfred and the cakes is probably the one story we all know about the Anglo-Saxon ruler, a detail as closely woven into popular history as Robert the Bruce being inspired by a spider and King Harold getting an arrow in the eye.

I have NO idea who any of these people are.

I'm sorry, but the name Ragnar Hairybreeks sounds more like a schoolyard taunt than a terrifying warrior name. Isn't breeks a name for pants or something? Not so scary. Now Eric Bloodaxe, that guy sounds scary. Think he handed out the bloodeagle a time or two also.

haha u havent been watching barbarian week on teh history channel, f42!

I loved when they mentioned a viking leader who refused to kill the children of the towns he ransacked, and how the other vikings thought that was hilarious.

Oh yeah! well your father died of old age!


Bud Grant was a terrible Coach!


/old viking insults

RAAAGGNAAAARR!
Burninating the country side. Burninating the peasants. Burninating the cakes and loaves.

/GRASSROOF COTTAGES!

Up ("oop") Helly Ah!

Ancient coruption of "Up Phalia!", a Celtic bastardization of a latin saying, spoken at funeral pyres.

Love how the article glosses over the "Blood Eagle" ritual, which was less of carving an eagle into the skin of the back, and more like splitting open the ribs at the spine, spreading them wide "like an eagle", and tossing te victim's lungs over his shoulders. Did I mention that they did this while he was still alive?

IM in ur hovl burning ur loaves

Available for comment.

Famous Anglo words that came straight out of the Vik dialects:

Lord = "Hlaf Wyrd", or "Wise giver of loaves", the one who 'won the bread' for their people.

Steward = "Sty Ward", or the keeper of the Lord's pigs.

Iapon, possibly borrowed from the Latin. "Weapon", usually a spear or other "impaling" instrument of mass destruction.

Law = "Allthing"; the original concept of writtn rules of conduct as imposed upon the Anglos, which involed trial by jury of peers. This eventually became the "Dane Law", or Law for short, which was the rule of the Vik raiders eevery year, at which time they would demand payment in echange for no raping and pilliaging, AKA the Danegeld (Dane Gold).

Viking Facts:
The Viks did not wear horns on their helmets; that was a sign of a chieftain only, and a practice that ended early in the Celtic age. It was usually a sign of afilliation with Kernnanos, a god of the wild animals.

The Vikings founded and settled the city of Du Blin (Dublin), and the Rus Vikings settled great swaths of northern Russia, usully as trading posts.

Vikings were farmers first and warriors second; because the Scandinavian custom of the time said that all land inheritanc went to the first-born son, all later born males had to find thier own land, hence their terrorization of Europe, and settling in Scotland and Ireland.

Vikings invented pants.

Vikings had the most nutritious diet in Europe, hence their amazingly large stature compared to the rest of the Europeans of the time.

Vikings bathed several times a week, so the Anglo women liked them better than their own men.

/Halfdan was here.

For everyone out there who, like me, had no idea what the hell the article was talking about, apparently King Alfred was walking around the countryside before a major battle and stopped at the house of a peasant who did not recognize him. She told him that he could have some food if he watched her cakes and made sure that they didn't burn, but he got distracted thinking about his plans for battle and let them burn.

Why anyone feels that this makes a good story escapes me.

Aragorn?

my sister is marrying a guy named Ragnar in two weeks.

From tfa: "The slaying of King Aella of Northumbria in York in 867 is an example - the Vikings carving an eagle into Aella's back, and ripping out his lungs in a horrific sacrifice."

That's a "blood eagle" execution. Very brutal and horrible way to die.

Ragnar Danneskjöld?

there was a show on the history channel last night about this.. weird

King Alfred burned the cakes. Thus began the tradition of fine British cookery that still exists today.

One-quarter Viking, and damn glad of it.

Approves of this post

/gotta get back to my game. Javle Svenska!!

I think Rory McTurk is as cool a name as Ragnar Hairybreeks.

I find it curious that everywhere the Vikings conquered and settled they eventually disappeared into the conquered people.

Vikings the true ceators of Europe?

The only Ragnar that matters is Ragnar Blackmane.

"FOR LEMAN RUSS!"

the Vikings are the historical people i most easily relate to.cant proove it but i definatly think im part viking.

Get the DVD "The Vikings" - Ernest Borgnine plays Ragnar. Tony Curtis and Kirk Douglas play his sons. Or read The Long Ships by Frans Bengtsson. Some characters (real names): Sven Rat-Nose, Thorlief Burned-Alive-in-his-house, GrinUlf (mouth split by an axe), Olof Champion-of-the-men-of-Breitfjord, King Ivar of the Broad Embrace, Olof Summerbird, Toke son of Grey Gull.

Some more real Viking names: Styrbjorn Man-Cleaver, Bjorn Butter- carrier, Sigurd Snake-eye, son of Ragnar Hairybreeks, "Ragnar Hairybreeks was a pattern for Vikings, and his sons were pretty tough too, all except Thorlief Coalbiter.

Einar was the son of Audun the Bald, the son of Thorolf Butter, the son of Thorstein the Unstable, the son of Grim with the Tuft."

So 'Fat Albert' is actually a Viking name.

Hjey Hjey Hjey

Four of the week days are named after Norse gods:

Tuesday: Tyr, the one-armed leader of the gods' army.
Wednesday: Wotan, the chief god.
Thursday: Thor the god of thunder (in German, the day is also known as Donnerstag -- thunder day).
Friday: Frigg, Wotan's wife.
Sunday and Monday have similar names in modern Scandinavia -- I don't know if those names came from Norse to English or vice versa. Saturday, I guess is after Saturn -- but in Norse it's called Laurdag/Lørdag -- washing day.

They bathed once a week, whether they needed it or not. But that was apparently enough to be considered hot from the perspective of English women. Things ain't changed too much since then, mind you.

Where do you people get all this viking info? The stuff I've found is all dry. It's not from books is it? No way I'm gonna use one of those.

So meade-ey.

Unavailable for comment

I love Norse sagas...

For some odd reason, the head of the lit dept. in the private Jesuit h.s. that I attended thought that the saga form was the absolute bomb so, rather than being heavy on Shakespeare and Milton, we read stuff like Njal's Saga (aka The Burning of Njal) and Laxadalla Saga.

It made junior year a very interesting time.

As an aside, there are a few old Apple game cracks floating around that credit Gudmund the Powerful... which was my earliest handle - taken from Njal's Saga.

I highly recommend anyone interested in Viking/Norse history to check out a few of the more available sagas... they read like a combo of genealogy, history and battle-book...

and they are very detailed when it comes to armed combat - especially when describing the injuries - sorta like Sam Peckinpah meets Eric the Red.

oh, and one thing I did learn... Vikings never had horned helmets... that was one of those historical inventions. So all of you Minnesota fans... sorry... not yours.

/my halberd rings
//someone will die

I used to be a Viking marauder, so I'm really getting a kick out of these replies.

/really

Well thank you Fark for teaching me something new every day.

\did not know about this blood eagle business
\\thoroughly creeped out, whether it's exaggerated or not

Was this inspired by the daylong History Channel miniseries on barbarians? Because I swear to God I watched it for a few hours, the last one being about King Alfred and his battle to drive out VIKING HORDES, an area of history I was completely ingorant of. Then five minutes later I get on Fark on find an article about it. Strange.

and the floor show never ends

Or read The Long Ships by Frans Bengtsson. Some characters (real names): Sven Rat-Nose, Thorlief Burned-Alive-in-his-house, GrinUlf (mouth split by an axe), Olof Champion-of-the-men-of-Breitfjord, King Ivar of the Broad Embrace, Olof Summerbird, Toke son of Grey Gull.

Seconded. Not only is it a damn good yarn, it is pretty much historically correct - not the events per se, but the background - the kings, the kaliph's bodyguard of Norsemen, the ships, the weapons and tactics etc. etc.

For those giggling at the name "Hairybreeks", mull this over: When surrounded by people who name themselves Shieldcleaver and Bloodaxe, in a culture where honour is important and armed combat is the accepted way of resolving disputes, anyone who wears the name Hairybreeks and lives must be seriously skilled in the noble art of wiping smirks of people's faces using sword or axe.

(Actually, the name is a reference to how Regnar killed a dragon - no mean feat.)

501nBoots

they are very detailed when it comes to armed combat - especially when describing the injuries - sorta like Sam Peckinpah meets Eric the Red. To say nothing of the last words.
"So, is Gunnar at home?"
"That I do not know, but his halberd is."

I always liked Thorvald the Skull-Spliter, 9th Earl of Orkney.
The brew they named after him isn't really to my taste, but the Hausakluffir was pretty kewl.

If you can trace your ancestery back to almost any part of Northern Europe, you probably have some Viking in you.
/embrace your inner berzerker.

Blaud

embrace your inner berzerker.

My love for you is like a truck...

and the floor show never ends:

re: viking names

How about: Skwiggard Skigelf? Tookie? William Murderface Murderface Murderface? Pickles? Nathan Explosion?

Staypuft_Mushmallow_Manz: a viking leader who refused to kill the children of the towns he ransacked, and how the other vikings thought that was hilarious.

lol

Anyone know any good Viking girl's names....I need one for an online game I'm playing.

/hope to do her honor

Solia How about Astrid or Ingrid?

I am descended from Danish Vikings. I have always been proud of the fact that while the rest of Europe was becoming Christianized, making fine art, writing poetry and becoming civilized my ancestors were beating in each others heads with human thigh bones.
Ragnar was a great example, he sacked the city of Paris and his sons were if anything worse than him.
For a great Norse name check out Rollo the Dangler (not making that one up).

Erik_Emune - nice... thanks for getting the reference... the character of Gunnar of Hlidarend drew me into Sagas more than any other. Once I discovered the history contained within the narrative, I was hooked.

The history of the Althing is one of the most fascinating bits of cultural and legal evolution that I've ever read.

If I were a teacher of history or political science, it would be a mandatory topic in my lesson plan.

On a more personal note... Kari Solmundarson was the bomb...

/let there be fog and let there be phantoms
//weird marvels to baffle your hunters