That kind of "satire" is like a Three Stooges episode, except The Three Stooges are funny.

I read that as gems and thought of those crappy faux-bling cell phones the kinds nowadays enjoy so much, along with their pogs and hip and/or hop music.

Exhibit B:


Cell phones and meteors covered in gems = the chuckles for MuckSP.
Germs = the blahs

Yeah, it would have been funnier if it was true.

After reading that article, I hoped for a second it was true.

I want a giant germ-covered meteorite to smash into the offices of BBSpot.

PirateKing: I want a giant germ-covered meteorite to smash into the offices of BBSpot.

Seconded. Why do BBSpot links ever get greenlit? Even a bad Onion article is better than anything they spew out.

/Cue the "Oh, the Onion was funny back when only I knew about it, when it became popular it sucked" crowd.

I'm still more worried about the demon goat.

I also read it as "gems." Weird.

So wait... The meteor is covered in cell phones?

That's the last one of their links I waste my time on.

Seconded. Why do BBSpot links ever get greenlit? Even a bad Onion article is better than anything they spew out.

If it wasn't for the Onion, I wouldn't know about the new Lots-Of-Pulp milk products available.

Gems here as well.

In space no one can hear you scream.

I lost brain cells just scanning thru that article

Oh, great... the last thing I need when facing global annihilation is a case of the Space Flu...

/sneezing phaser bolts, disintegrating the cat in the process.

So here is what we need to do:

Step 1: Build the largest rocket even created

Step 2: Assemble the greatest Hunters known to man and a giant fork-lift

Step 3: Have them track, Tranquilize and capture Rosie O'Donnel

Step 4: Load her and the forklift onto the rocket

Step 5: Shoot said rocket close to the meteor and use Rosie's gravitational field to push the Meteor off course.

This is the best quote ever:
"It's not surprising," he continued. "A public toilet gets cleaned more often than a meteor."

Is Corkey from Life Goes On the guest greenlighter today?

Dammit. I hoped it was true. ;;

/looks like I'm working for a few more years

EVERYBODY PANIC!!!

/ it's not a streetlamp

Yet another gems reader here.

The meteor, named ZG-7134 by NASA scientists, will impact Earth March 21, 2008 at 11:16 am ET

Everybody panic!!

I'd say if we only have 13 months left, we ought to be out there having as much consensual sex as possible.

Yay, so if the meteor doesn't destroy Earth in its initial impact, we get to be wiped out by the introduction of new germs that we have no immunity to, like the the colonizers and the indians!

/When I read that as gems, i was going with... "At least if we get taken out, we get taken out in style. We're gonna get blinged to death."

EVERYBODY PANIC

Hmm.. I see a post-apocolyptic world where normal men are pitted against mindless beasts mutated by an interstellar genetic virus.

Coming to a paperback shelf near you.

seems like you'd have to try hard to be as unfunny as this website.

Oh noes!!!!!

"To combat this threat, NASA scientists are developing a giant "Lysol" missile which will kill 99.99% of germs on the meteor before it strikes Earth."

99.99% of this whole article tries too hard.

If a frog had wings, it would bump it's a$$ on the streetlight every time it hopped.

I heard the tiny screams of thousands of brain cells leaping out of my ears to their certain deaths as I read that.

if we launch TWO LYSOL missles we can kill 199.8% of germs...WE MUST ACT NOW!!!

Any time I hears a scientist say a sentence beginning with "It wouldn't be a stretch to imagine... "

...I stops listening.

Uhh so *if* i giant meteor the size of Alaska does hit the earth, we are now more worried about killing the germs? Uhh i think logic-man and his side kick reason-boy are on vacation at the BBSpot. We would all die morans, everyone, you, me, your pet dog, the hooker on the corner.

The stupidity of this article befuddles me to the point of head asplosions.

I always trust the local news from Arkansas.

GEMS??? Shades of "The Core" (terrible movie)... NLP anyone?

Chaos Theory: Yay, so if the meteor doesn't destroy Earth in its initial impact, we get to be wiped out by the introduction of new germs that we have no immunity to, like the the colonizers and the indians!

Henry Kuttner and C.L. Moore called; they want their plot back.

so it's not enough that the meteor will kill us but it also has germs.

omg everybody panic

I have an idea! Send Ben Affleck and Bruce Willis up into space, let them play some latent homosexual grab-ass, let them defy every law of Newtonian physics, while Steve Buscemi humps a nuclear device. We can salute the flag and sing bad Arrowsmith ballads. Then save the Earth just in time for Fouth of July with a big ole can of Febreze!

I for one welcome our new toilet-seat-meteor-germ overlords.

So, my cell phone is a germ?

Wow. That article was horrible.

Perhaps these germs will mutate humans into radioactive super energy beings with godlike powers that span space and time.

BBSpot, huh?

*cockpunches submitter*

Unless that meteor has also been up my ass, I doubt it.

/did I say that out loud?

My ideal scenario is for my late 30s-early-40s to resemble the trailer from 'Resident Evil-Extinction.'

'Cause that'd be some good laughs, right there.

Where's the punch line? What are you guys talking about.

/the explosion will be enormous

If we are this worried about germs why don't we send Brittany, Anna Nicole, and Paris up into space and of this rock?

/Seriously, more germs than any meteor
/Anyone?

anyone else google ZG-7134 to get more information about that meteor to find only 3 articles none in english?

What horrible and obvious satire :(

So which fark admin/mod has friends who own/work at that site that they get the special privilege of being greenlit so often when the articles suck?