My plans when my kids finally leave are to sell the house and nearly everything, buy a ginormous RV and live wherever I happen to stop. Get tired of that and drive on.....

The Real Damien: My plans when my kids finally leave are to sell the house and nearly everything, buy a ginormous RV and live wherever I happen to stop. Get tired of that and drive on.....

Get ready for many Farkers to critisize you for failing to coddle your children by providing them a place to crash on weekends and holidays as well as a place to come slinking back to after they mysteriously can't find a job that pays $70k right out of college.

How dare you enjoy the fruits of your labor?

Once the little parasites are finally out of the house and on their own it must seem like there a ton of extra money all of a sudden.

My brother and I are moving out within 2 months of eachother. He's a couple years late though :D

The Real Damien: My plans when my kids finally leave are to sell the house and nearly everything, buy a ginormous RV and live wherever I happen to stop. Get tired of that and drive on.



My plans too. Might even do it in Europe instead of the US.

Wow rka, bitter much?

Empty Nest?

I see rka has made battery acid from the lemons life gave him.

I'm working on an atomic sourball, myself.

I think my ex had Empty Bush Syndrome after her hysterectomy.

My youngest is 14, so I've got some time to go yet.
The wife wants to do the travel nurse thing and drag me along with her. Oh well, there's always work for a wandering fixit guy.

Ok, I gotta be retarded here or something buuut...what the hell does "Man up nancy boy surprisingly not on list" mean? Well just the "Man up nancy boy" part. I just don't follow it.

People are always talking about how they can't wait for their kids to move away. Why'd you spawn in the first place?

/no kids for me

ehrichweiss,
You're not retarded, but submitter is. I don't get it either.

The Real Damien: My plans when my kids finally leave are to sell the house and nearly everything, buy a ginormous RV and live wherever I happen to stop. Get tired of that and drive on.....

An RV is definitely not for me. Sell the house and buy a nice sailboat - maybe a Jeanneau 40. Cruise down the west coast to Mexico, then eventually to Panama and the Caribbean. Up the east coast and across to the Med. When I have had my fill of Europe and North Africa I can head to Rio, Johannesburg and Capetown, Seychelles, Maldives, then Australia. I could probably spend a couple years in the South Pacific before finally going home to meet grandchildren.

If your daughter just went off to college and you find yourself particularly missing her company, just try to find comfort in the fact that she's probably being plowed by a complete stranger at this very moment. Especially if you were tricked into buying her way into a sorority. See? Things aren't so bad.

ehrichweiss

never you mind, just stay safe and sound on your short bus.

poofter.

2006-08-27 08:55:29 PM Flibbert

ehrichweiss,
You're not retarded, but submitter is. I don't get it either.

Just because your life exists in a cultural vacuum does not mean the submitter is retarded.

Results 1 - 10 of about 1,170,000 for +"Man Up".

don't forget flibbert for the ride. just becuase he doesn't understand something, according to his logic, it makes someone else "retarded."

incredible.

Just do what my parents did. Go back to college and get that degree you put on hold to raise your 2 ungrateful children. Oh yeah, discover internet porn. (yay dad!)

HAHA!

Men can't have emotions!

Honestly...it's been over a year and a half since I moved out...Dad does seem to get lonely sometimes, wants to hang around my place a good bit, or have me stop by the house. That more has to do with the fact that my little brother doesn't help with his blood pressure and my sister is, to be blunt, a tightwad.

But whatever. He gets about 10 weekends a year plus an entire week around thanksgiving at my uncles hunting cabin, and that seems to really make him happy.

Take it from a dad-you never stop worrying about your kids-ever.

I'm guessing that the man up nancy boy part of the headline means that any fella who needs help coping with the fact that his kids have finally moved out of the house, is a flippin nancy boy and should proceed to enjoy his life without worrying about wrecked cars and bail anymore.

/Yup, two stepsons, one son
//26, 12, 10
///all at *home*

AAK, 26,22 10

My kids are out of the house and the big change I see is my sex life with my wife got much better and I can walk around the house naked without the kids rolling their eyes and making excuses for me to their friends.

offacue

26- needs to go
22- If he is still in school cool otherwise See ya!

I was out the door at 17. finished high school, some college, going back now that my G/F graduated and now it's my turn. I still see my dad a couple times a month.

Well, my dad died shortly after I graduated from college. He didn't even get to go to my graduation, because the chemo made him so sick.

Remember kids, life is long, hard, cold, and doesn't give a rat's ass about you or your sorry existence.

I opt to skip the kids and go straight for a midlife-crisis-mobile, myself. I'm leaning towards a Mazda MX-5 with a LS2 8-cyl. under the hood.

autopsybeverage

Sorry to hear that. My dad died my freshman year of college, cancer also. 3 years after graduating, and my mother is still asking me when I'm going to move back home.

Empty nest indeed.

The kids are gone and I get my garage back and all my tools are where I left them.

Moved out kids = guests upon return visits. Don't fark with my stuff.....

offacue

26- needs to go
22- If he is still in school cool otherwise See ya!

I was out the door at 17. finished high school, some college, going back now that my G/F graduated and now it's my turn. I still see my dad a couple times a month.

Believe me I know. But I still have to deal with wifey. They're her kids.

Kids - I was one of those once.

If I had kids and they moved out... hmmm... divorce their mother?

/my inner child wants another beer

I've already told my two turds that I'll be back to fill their nests when I get old enough to need someone to feed me and empty a colostomy bag. I can't wait to shiat on their floor, scratch their CD's, fill their Xbox 1440 with crayons and generally make their life hell for a few years.

Empty next?

Are these people birds? I don't see any feathers.

lordargent [TotalFark]

Empty next?

Chicken necks?

I'll sell the farkin nest and go where flesh, golf, food and fishing are all cheap.

I enjoy carrying around the SAME $20 bill in my wallet for an entire week!

aaah...well I guess that "nancy boy" isn't a term we use "in these here parts" cause that didn't make much sense to me either but I suspect anything I might say could be hit by a profanity filter.

My grandfather's family has a tradition of sending the kids out of the house when they turn 18, and they all turn out very well.

My two sons already read FARK (the photoshop contests) and my house has a basement, so I don't think empty-nest syndrome is in my future.

Step 1: divorce that shrew that's been making your life hell for 18 years.
Step 2: blow all your money on strippers, drugs and booze.
Step 3: die happy.

And "man up, nancy boy" means quit whining about your farking feelings, you emasculated POS, and start enjoying the life you wasted raising ungrateful brats.

ehrichweiss, you'd be surprised. All that really gets filtered are the big 7, a few cliches, and one particular racial slur. Apparently our bretheren with darker skin are the only minority worthy of having their feelings coddled here on fark.

Can't say I disagree with the filtering policy, but I'd like to see it administered fairly and equally, or not at all.

Shoot. I've already told mine of about my plans after they grow up and go. Daddy is going to Refice(Brazil) and teach english and play Capoeira for a year and come back on all the major holidays. I know that I'm raising them up right and strong so they really don't need or want Daddy micro-managing their everyday experiences. My Mom went back to school,then seminary after we all left the nest and tells me constantly that as long as you have breath.....LIVE!

As a father of two little ones, I can certainly entertain the thought of what it must be like after all the time you spend thinking about and planning your life (to a certain extent) around your children, that there will be a day when it's back to just the two of you. That being said, don't ever lose focus on your own life and goals. We are all here for a very short time and gol darnit, it just ain't worth sittin' around being sad about any of it. I know, I know, it's an f'd up world but whining about it doesn't accomplish anything. I for one can totally get behind the sub's comments. "MAN UP NANCY BOY".
/thank you
//time for my geritol dose

When our son grows up and moves out I can see my husband freaking out over it. He doesn't even handle the kid staying overnight with Nana well.

Me? I'll be tap dancing. If you raise 'em right they can fly on their own.

What to do after the kids move out?

1. Beer
2. Sports on TV
3. Golf
4. Beer
5. More golf (and beer)
6. Porn on the wide-screen
7. Beer



/did I mention beer?

I know a guy at work who won't have this little problem, because he doesn't seem to be able to get his wife pregnant. LOL

1: Build shed out back.
2: Equip shed with electricity.
3: Equip shed with couch, TV, PS2, beer fridge, and bong.
4: Invite your empty nester friends over to hang out.

gradatim

I know a guy at work who won't have this little problem, because he doesn't seem to be able to get his wife pregnant. LOL

HA HA! Pwned!

As Homer Simpson so eloquently put it, "18 and you're out!"

My children have heard it, and I eagerly await it. Not just for selfish reasons either...I think that staying at home when I was in college kept me from really enjoying the college experience, and I want my kids to get the whole thing - alcohol poisoning, bad trips, genital warts and all. All the things that I regret missing out on.

/Plus I want the whole naked around the house, sex with the wife thing, etc. back.

BearToy


LAWL!! Thank you so much for that.

Also "Man up" means stop being a little biatch about your problem and do something about it (not directly referring to you, just saying). "Nancy boy" is just a term for a guy who just isn't manly or doesn't do manly things.