I wanna say something. I'm gonna put it out there; if you like it, you can take it, if you don't, send it right back. I want to be on you.

The human torch was denied a bank loan.
/Scotchy, scotchy, scotchy, scotch. There it goes, into my belly.

Sixty percent of the time it works every time.

I can think of one or two newsreaders I wouldn't mind touching up...

obligatory picture of hot newscastess

Erin Burnette CNBC?

/anyone
//anyone?

Liz Clayman has some huge sweater pillows.

/CNBC too

If you were a man I'd punch you. I'd punch you right in the mouth.

they were "TOUCHING UP" the news readers??

....And I'm Ron Burgundy. Go f*ck yourself, Russia.

I want to be on Robin Mead. YOWZA!

I love scotch. Scotchy, scotch, scotch. Here it goes down, down into my belly...

gs082569, I'm going to need proof of your claim.

/Agree with the Robin Mead sentiment.
//I Needs Me Some Mead.

Since this is going to devolve into another "Hot Newswomen" thread, can I just point out now that Harris Faulkner is a very handsome womens?

/Probably the last thing she wants to hear, given her history.

"Since this is going to devolve into another "Hot Newswomen"

Either that or a quote Ron Burgundy thread.

"They called it San Diego, which means a 'whale's Vagina'"

Stay classy.

Bark twice if you're in Milwaukee.

A straight shot to the baby maker.

I'm not even mad thats amazing.

AUDREY. Look at these bags. This is bush.

The_Gunt
"I'm gonna be honest, it smells like pure gasoline."

"I'm going to walk this situation off..."

/It's the pleats



As an aside... How do Capt. Happy Hour and I always end up in the threads where "stupid funny" movies are quoted?

"What's your name? Lanolin? You mean like sheeps wool?"

AppleChill: I once saw the camera cut to a local anchorman who was chewing gum, not expecting to be on. With a somewhat shocked look, he pulled the gum out and stashed it under the desk. (It was Larry Stogner of WTVD-11, Durham, NC.)

The Stoginator!
I used to work at a newsstand in Durham in the 90's- the Stogmeister hung out in the porno mags so, so often. We used to snicker like hell behind his back. I guess he does net porn now, but back then he was a big porno mag hound. The guy is huge- tall, and clumsy, sort of like Chewbacca.
I'm starting to realize that Durham IS interesting.

We're just going to have to take their word for it that this was hilarious.