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(Washington Post) Scary Every wargame simulation of fullscale India/Pakistan war ends in nukes   (washingtonpost.com) divider line 223
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11188 clicks; posted to Main » on 23 May 2002 at 5:37 PM   |  Make this a Fark FavoriteFavorite    |   share: Share on OMGTWITTER WEB2.0share on StumbleUponshare on Facebook  more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!

223 Comments   (+0 »)


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firstmattinspace 2002-05-23 01:36:25 PM  
Proper use of scary tag.

 
firstmattinspace 2002-05-23 01:36:35 PM  
And a great article.

 
firstmattinspace 2002-05-23 01:36:59 PM  
No matter what "side" you are on.

 
meshman 2002-05-23 01:41:28 PM  
He is right about one thing, if the entire population of both countries was wiped out except for one person on each side, they would kill each other over the same freaking issues. If they do lob nukes, hopefully they'll do us all a favor and have a few misses over in the Isreal/Palestine area.

 
PopeD 2002-05-23 02:10:05 PM  
Excellent article.

 
JerseyTim [TotalFark] 2002-05-23 02:26:08 PM  
Lousy W.O.P.R.!


Mmmm.... whopper.

 
clifclav 2002-05-23 02:36:43 PM  
I've fought in more than 20 "wars" between India and Pakistan. I've seen skirmishes turn into conflagrations. I've seenferocious attacks across the border, and defending divisions worn down. I've seen Pakistani commanders turn tonuclear weapons to fend off advancingIndian divisions.

I've seen people that knew how to use the freakin spacebar.

 
stephenv 2002-05-23 04:44:49 PM  
Sadly though, this is something that is NOT going away. Someone needs to drop a nuke along their border so they can't get to each other. Might as well start WWIII as a surprise attack from the US than from India or Pakistan.

 
Foaming [TotalFark] 2002-05-23 05:32:05 PM  
No good can come of this.

 
dylanspurgin 2002-05-23 05:39:14 PM  
i saw this in a movie once.

 
JerseyTim [TotalFark] 2002-05-23 05:39:29 PM  
obvious.

 
dylanspurgin 2002-05-23 05:39:34 PM  
maybe we should teach them to play tic-tac-toe

 
MayoBoy 2002-05-23 05:39:50 PM  
That will cook your curry in a hurry.

 
cosyg 2002-05-23 05:40:33 PM  
If they start lobbing nukes back and forth at each other, who'll move to the US and run the AM-PM stores? Will we be forced to make our OWN chili dogs at 2am?

 
TampaNugget 2002-05-23 05:40:40 PM  
Firstmattinspace hit the trifecta, and the first ten posts were adorned with the new blue tootsie roll logo. I have to get one of those.

 
Henchman 2002-05-23 05:41:10 PM  
Interesting game. The only winning move is not to play.

How about a nice game of chess?

 
LordWatson 2002-05-23 05:41:37 PM  
If America is supposed to be the world's biggest superpower why doesn't Washington just say to those clowns in India/Pakistan: "If you even think of using your nukes, we will nuke both of you. No one wins. You're all dead."

 
JerseyTim [TotalFark] 2002-05-23 05:41:41 PM  

 
palexc 2002-05-23 05:41:43 PM  

Would you like to play a game? How about Global Thermonuclear War?

 
Max Load 2002-05-23 05:41:46 PM  
And all this fighting is over some fancy sweaters.

 
derangedlunatech 2002-05-23 05:42:04 PM  
"Hello, Dr. Faulken. How about a nice game of Global Thermoneuclear Warfare?"

,img src="http://missile.sourceforge.net/missile003.gif">

 
farkbitch 2002-05-23 05:42:14 PM  
it's a prophecy! [/sarcasm]

 
Henchman 2002-05-23 05:42:25 PM  
While we're on the subject of the Wargames movie, did anyone else find it hilarious that all that data and voice synth could travel instantaneously over a 300 baud modem?

 
MayoBoy 2002-05-23 05:42:47 PM  

Tootsie roll or tampon - you decide.

 
TheBitingFaery 2002-05-23 05:42:59 PM  
*huddles up in a ball in the corner and cries*

 
utter_bastard 2002-05-23 05:43:08 PM  
OS they want to blow eachother in to the stone age. That will set them back, what, two maybe three weeks.

 
derangedlunatech 2002-05-23 05:43:09 PM  
damn typos, and no way to edit a post....


 
palexc 2002-05-23 05:43:24 PM  
Henchman:

Whatever that compresson is, it makes Frauhoffer MP3 look like a joke.

 
utter_bastard 2002-05-23 05:43:59 PM  
I meant Ok.

damn ftd (farking typing disorder)

 
JerseyTim [TotalFark] 2002-05-23 05:43:59 PM  
Max Load, LOL!

 
jparker 2002-05-23 05:44:16 PM  
Interesting to read Sam Gardiner's analysis on the
potential India-Pakistan war. Is this guy for real?
What makes him think he knows better than the Indian
army chief who runs one of the world's biggest army?

So he ran some video game simulations. Does he
seriously believe that these simulations are even
close to what would happen in a real war? Just
curious: Did this genius also run simulations on the
Vietnam War?

I ran some simulations last week on the Bears and
Eagles game (ok I admit I played the game on the Xbox
console). Guess what? The Bears won the simulation. I
bet all my savings on the Bears in today's game. I am
so happy that these advanced simulations so accurately
mimick real life.

War is always bad. One doesn't need simulations to
predict that there will be a heavy deathtoll when two
neighboring countries face off. But these cheap shots
at generals of other countries is hardly called for.
What is the India army chief going to say? "Ummm...
let's not fight. I'm afraid there'll be heavy
casualities. I am a peace loving guy"?

If Mr. Gardiner were to take time off his advanced "
video games" and actually go take a walk around the
block every now and then, his analysis might be worth
reading.

 
volcano 2002-05-23 05:44:21 PM  
The best part was the backdoor password to the 'WOPR' server. "Joshua"

Like some Unix computer guru is going to name his password after his dead son.

 
TV 2002-05-23 05:45:04 PM  
Henchman, when you're a 1980's style 'computer whiz', there are no limitations to what you can do.

 
JerseyTim [TotalFark] 2002-05-23 05:45:47 PM  
05-23-02 05:44:21 PM Volcano
The best part was the backdoor password to the 'WOPR' server. "Joshua"

Like some Unix computer guru is going to name his password after his dead son.


You're right, Volcano, it was totally unbelievable. Who would believe some Unix computer guru would actually get laid in the first place?

 
volcano 2002-05-23 05:45:50 PM  

 
Henchman 2002-05-23 05:46:05 PM  
TV: Except sustain a successful movie career, apparently. :)

 
dylanspurgin 2002-05-23 05:46:38 PM  
What about that 2400 baud modem in Hackers that they all gawked over. tasty

 
Umidude 2002-05-23 05:47:09 PM  
Mines much more powerful than a WOPR!

 
TampaNugget 2002-05-23 05:47:59 PM  
I cluck for the Chicken WOPR.

 
volcano 2002-05-23 05:48:42 PM  
JerseyTim:

LOL - very funny. Believe it or not these guys often find chicks just as nerdy as themselves, then they reproduce. And the kids all end up with something called 'Asperger's syndrome' - kind of a high-functioning form of autism.

BTW - there's a high concentration of Aspergers around San Jose / Silicon valley area:

The Geek Syndrome

And this guy almost certainly has it:


 
Kiz 2002-05-23 05:48:47 PM  
Wargames are actually often a very good indicator of how the real thing will turn out. Part of the reason is that the leaders of both countries have almost certainly got people doing the exact same thing themselves, and they'll base their strategies on the results.

 
TV 2002-05-23 05:48:58 PM  
HM ha! nice.

 
Henchman 2002-05-23 05:49:12 PM  
Volcano: Why do I get the feeling that the army will soon start recruiting in the manner described in "The Last Starfighter?"

Captian: Sir, this man just fragged an entire platoon in under thirty seconds. He's a ruthless killing machine of frightening efficiency.
General: I knew planting that spyware in Counterstrike would come in handy. Offer him a comission immediately!
Captain: Yes, sir. I'll send word to his grade school immediately.

 
impaler [TotalFark] 2002-05-23 05:49:21 PM  
*covers ears*

LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA!

 
DrToast 2002-05-23 05:49:36 PM  
05-23-02 05:42:59 PM TheBitingFaery
*huddles up in a ball in the corner and cries*


No need to cry. If there is nuclear war, we'll die instantaneously.

Of course, since it's in Pakistan/India, it will probably take a while for the wind to blow all the radiation clouds over to the US. So actually, we won't die right away, we'll probably die in 4-5 years of some painful form of cancer...

*sits next to Faery and cries*

 
Mattix 2002-05-23 05:49:52 PM  
JParker: He is not running video games. He is running "simulations" and wargames that are run by real people. They have people playing the role of leaders and officers in each of the military, and run it. A simulation is not necessarily run on silicon.

 
dylanspurgin 2002-05-23 05:51:13 PM  
Id like to run my simulation on some silicon.

/troll

 
cosyg 2002-05-23 05:51:23 PM  
JerseyTim:
Go easy on the unix guru = geek theme = bad thing. I happen to know for a fact that while being a geek in high school got you beaten up, it now gets you a six figure salary.

The six figure salary WILL get you laid.

 
tjr7n 2002-05-23 05:51:51 PM  
What can the United States do?

Stay the fock out of there!

Did you see many cops getting between L.A. rioters and Circuit City in 1992?

 
jeremyf 2002-05-23 05:52:04 PM  
Yawn, nukes are just like big bombs. The fears of fallout and such are real but have been greatly overexaggerated due to movies, etc. They're also not as damaging as conventional weapons (read slaughterhouse-five?). Hiroshima and Nagasaki were rebuilt almost immediately after being bombed and now millions and millions of people live there and in the surrounding areas.

 
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