If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.
Fark SearchWeb Fark

         more options... Create account

(National Weather Service) NewsFlash New Orleans: National Weather Service officially loses all bowel control   (weather.noaa.gov) divider line 3416
More: NewsFlash  
•       •       •

72213 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 Aug 2005 at 2:02 PM   |  Make this a Fark FavoriteFavorite    |   share: Share on OMGTWITTER WEB2.0share on StumbleUponshare on Facebook  more»
Want to get NewsFlash notifications in email?

3416 Comments   (+0 »)


Archived thread
First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | » | Last
 
Texa$ [TotalFark] 2005-08-28 01:22:34 PM  
Run! Run! or you'll be well done!

 
gsnfl 2005-08-28 01:25:20 PM  
I have never, ever read an alert like that in my 16 years of government employment. Flee to the West people and never return.

 
Folderol [TotalFark] 2005-08-28 01:26:01 PM  
You get the feeling the the N.O. Weather Service people are a glass-half-empty group of people?

 
jghanc [TotalFark] 2005-08-28 01:26:52 PM  
Those links from College of DuPage don't match up with the NWS warnings, or the public warnings they post on their weather pages. Regardless, these aren't warnings that the NWS or NHC are posting on their sites.

 
40below [TotalFark] 2005-08-28 01:28:22 PM  
This has been posted to the ongoing main page thread with this link. Looks legit, but the others don't:

http://weather.noaa.gov/cgi-bin/iwszone?Sites=:laz062

 
vitaminP 2005-08-28 01:29:11 PM  
The rich people have already left, bible in hand, hoping the poor unfortunate people get out OK.

 
chakalakasp [TotalFark] 2005-08-28 01:31:59 PM  
College of Dupage is a reliable source for NWS product dissemniation. I use them all the time when I stormchase.

 
jghanc [TotalFark] 2005-08-28 01:33:44 PM  
Regardless, these aren't warnings that the NWS or NHC are posting on their sites.

Looks like I typed to slow.

 
DrewFL 2005-08-28 01:36:09 PM  
I think that this is a hoax...these warnings are never so melodramatic.

 
charmed1782 2005-08-28 01:37:47 PM  
Holy moly. I'm glad I live far, far away from the ocean today.

 
ranold 2005-08-28 01:38:25 PM  
http://weather.noaa.gov/cgi-bin/iwszone?Sites=:laz062

HOLY shiat....The NOAA says the same thing....2nd report down.

 
chakalakasp [TotalFark] 2005-08-28 01:38:37 PM  
Here it is on the NWS site:

http://weather.noaa.gov/cgi-bin/iwszone?Sites=:laz069M

Doing a search on the page for the word "livestock" will take you right to the bulliten.

 
nekom [TotalFark] 2005-08-28 01:39:51 PM  
Don't know if it's a hoax or not, but I wouldn't say it's that far fetched of a prediction. This is history in the making, in a very bad way. If you're religious, pray. If you're not, hope. This is going to get ugly, no matter how it pans out.

 
zagrophyte 2005-08-28 01:40:57 PM  
vitaminP: The rich people have already left, bible in hand, hoping the poor unfortunate people get out OK.

What? Did you get bit by a troll today? :P

 
auspicious 2005-08-28 01:43:42 PM  
PERSONS...PETS...AND LIVESTOCK EXPOSED TO THE
WINDS WILL FACE CERTAIN DEATH IF STRUCK.

It won't be pretty in Nola. Katrina sucked all the storms down to Houston last night. Best of luck to those there.

 
webmasterjoe 2005-08-28 01:44:44 PM  
nekom: Don't know if it's a hoax or not

It's also on the official government weather site, so I don't think it's a hoax.

 
rhiannon [TotalFark] 2005-08-28 01:44:49 PM  
So, they're saying it's going to be bad?

 
Vici 2005-08-28 01:46:44 PM  
Bush just went on air to tell people to get the fark out of NOLA, and oh by the way, things are going well in Iraq.

 
Tiga 2005-08-28 01:47:34 PM  
I'm just speechless. My aunt and her husband left this morning. Their house is 1/4 mile from Lake Pontchatrain. They'll have nothing left.

 
nekom [TotalFark] 2005-08-28 01:48:19 PM  
webmasterjoe: It's also on the official government weather site, so I don't think it's a hoax.

Wow. Never saw a warning anywhere near as forboding as that. I hope we at least get the evacuation over with so there's not a big death toll. The property damage, though. Yikes, will there ever be another Mardi Gras?

 
lexingtonienne 2005-08-28 01:49:45 PM  
I don't think I've ever seen the NWS use ! marks.

(Would I go to hell for posting the "Oh No, not the Livestock!" picture?)

 
jghanc [TotalFark] 2005-08-28 01:50:55 PM  
I'm curious why that warning isn't part of the advisories on the NHC page. To get to the Armageddon warning via the NHC web page, you'll have to click on "other products" and follow that to the Internet Weather Service links, and search by region or city. There, it's sort of sandwiched between two less forboding warnings.

 
neapoi 2005-08-28 01:51:10 PM  
I'm so sorry Tiga - my condolences.

 
ArbitraryConstant 2005-08-28 01:53:12 PM  
nekom: "Yikes, will there ever be another Mardi Gras?"

Natural disaster has never stopped Americans from rebuilding, even when it might not be a particularly good idea.

They'll be back with better building codes. Just you watch.

 
cybercyph 2005-08-28 01:53:21 PM  
Sounds just like what I remember from the cat-5 I experienced as a kid on Kauai... Iniki was quite an experience. Best wishes, New Orleans...

 
chakalakasp [TotalFark] 2005-08-28 01:53:51 PM  
Well, probably because the local National Weather Service office issued it, not the National Hurricane Center. The bulliten you read is probably being played over NOLA weather radio, so it's getting to the people who need to hear it.

 
HaywoodJablonski [TotalFark] 2005-08-28 01:56:14 PM  
auspicious: t won't be pretty in Nola. Katrina sucked all the storms down to Houston last night. Best of luck to those there.

Yeah I drove home last night, and it felt like I was underwater.

 
Calvin Hobbes 2005-08-28 01:57:04 PM  
ArbitraryConstant: Natural disaster has never stopped Americans from rebuilding, even when it might not be a particularly good idea.

When I first came here, this was all swamp. Everyone said I was daft to build a castle on a swamp, but I built in all the same, just to show them. It sank into the swamp. So I built a second one. That sank into the swamp. So I built a third. That burned down, fell over, then sank into the swamp.

 
nekom [TotalFark] 2005-08-28 01:57:10 PM  
chakalakasp:

Well, probably because the local National Weather Service office issued it, not the National Hurricane Center. The bulliten you read is probably being played over NOLA weather radio, so it's getting to the people who need to hear it.

If that's read out on weather radio, or better yet the EAS, that might be a pretty good way to scare the bejesus out of people and get them the fark out of there! Maybe that's the idea?

 
supichoo [TotalFark] 2005-08-28 02:01:51 PM  
this is why i love earthquakes.

 
nekom [TotalFark] 2005-08-28 02:03:20 PM  
They are reading that RIGHT NOW on fox news.

 
Tiga 2005-08-28 02:03:35 PM  
nekom: If that's read out on weather radio, or better yet the EAS, that might be a pretty good way to scare the bejesus out of people and get them the fark out of there! Maybe that's the idea?

They are reading it on Fox News right now.

 
moltov 2005-08-28 02:04:46 PM  
Great headline!

/off to rtfa

 
Ratbert42 2005-08-28 02:05:00 PM  
When was the last time New Orleans got hit with a Cat 5?

Only 3 category five hurricanes have ever made landfall in the United States since records began: one in 1935, Hurricane Camille in 1969, and Hurricane Andrew. If Katrina doesn't suddenly fall apart, she's gonna leave one hell of a mess.

 
urger [TotalFark] 2005-08-28 02:05:15 PM  
DON'T PANIC!

 
Alexandra 2005-08-28 02:05:58 PM  
Looks like the name Katrina will be retired after this.

 
chakalakasp [TotalFark] 2005-08-28 02:06:37 PM  
Recon just reported possible reading of 902mb.

 
Cthulus_Toaster 2005-08-28 02:06:47 PM  
You Call that a hurricane???
I call that a hurricane OF NINJAS!!!!
/sweet tapdancing cheese danish on acid.

 
Snarfle 2005-08-28 02:06:54 PM  
ArbitraryConstant: Natural disaster has never stopped Americans from rebuilding

Take California for example.

/Mudslides? Improbable!

 
tchamber 2005-08-28 02:07:34 PM  
MOST OF THE AREA WILL BE UNINHABITABLE FOR WEEKS...PERHAPS LONGER. AT
LEAST ONE HALF OF WELL CONSTRUCTED HOMES WILL HAVE ROOF AND WALL
FAILURE. ALL GABLED ROOFS WILL FAIL...LEAVING THOSE HOMES SEVERELY
DAMAGED OR DESTROYED.

THE MAJORITY OF INDUSTRIAL BUILDINGS WILL BECOME NON FUNCTIONAL.
PARTIAL TO COMPLETE WALL AND ROOF FAILURE IS EXPECTED. ALL WOOD
FRAMED LOW RISING APARTMENT BUILDINGS WILL BE DESTROYED. CONCRETE
BLOCK LOW RISE APARTMENTS WILL SUSTAIN MAJOR DAMAGE...INCLUDING SOME
WALL AND ROOF FAILURE.

HIGH RISE OFFICE AND APARTMENT BUILDINGS WILL SWAY DANGEROUSLY...A
FEW TO THE POINT OF TOTAL COLLAPSE. ALL WINDOWS WILL BLOW OUT.

AIRBORNE DEBRIS WILL BE WIDESPREAD...AND MAY INCLUDE HEAVY ITEMS SUCH
AS HOUSEHOLD APPLIANCES AND EVEN LIGHT VEHICLES. SPORT UTILITY
VEHICLES AND LIGHT TRUCKS WILL BE MOVED. THE BLOWN DEBRIS WILL CREATE
ADDITIONAL DESTRUCTION. PERSONS...PETS...AND LIVESTOCK EXPOSED TO THE
WINDS WILL FACE CERTAIN DEATH IF STRUCK.

POWER OUTAGES WILL LAST FOR WEEKS...AS MOST POWER POLES WILL BE DOWN
AND TRANSFORMERS DESTROYED. WATER SHORTAGES WILL MAKE HUMAN SUFFERING
INCREDIBLE BY MODERN STANDARDS.

THE VAST MAJORITY OF NATIVE TREES WILL BE SNAPPED OR UPROOTED. ONLY
THE HEARTIEST WILL REMAIN STANDING...BUT BE TOTALLY DEFOLIATED. FEW
CROPS WILL REMAIN. LIVESTOCK LEFT EXPOSED TO THE WINDS WILL BE
KILLED.


Holy Crap.

 
litespeed74 2005-08-28 02:08:20 PM  
I hope everyone gets out ok.
Please pack up all the andoille sausage too.

 
Confabulat [TotalFark] 2005-08-28 02:08:31 PM  
MAXIMUM SUSTAINED WINDS OF 175 MPH?????

I just woke up and I'm sort of a hurricane junkie, and OMG I have never seen anything like this one. Run for the hills for the love of God.

 
Glaurung 2005-08-28 02:08:40 PM  
Just finishing up some school work right now, then I'm going to head to the Times-Picayune - one of the safest buildings in the city that I know of, with its own generators and bullet-proof glass.

If anyone wants to place a classified ad tomorrow, swim over and say hi!

 
superhappyfunball 2005-08-28 02:08:56 PM  
All the usual media whores will eat this up.

Everyone freak out!!!11!!

 
moltov 2005-08-28 02:09:26 PM  
http://kamala.cod.edu

doesn't look at all like

http://weather.noaa.gov/

 
tfresh 2005-08-28 02:09:35 PM  
I got out this morning... and am happier for it. Now before it hits, is there any chance we can get every reality show cast member, show person, producer and writer down in the french quarter?

 
yookaloco 2005-08-28 02:09:39 PM  
Someone illustrate why this really is going to be so devastating... the whole "below sea-level in a swamp, constantly pumping water higher" thing.

Saw a discovery channel special on this months ago. NO is basically an in ground pool waiting to be filled.

 
Jeff [TotalFark] 2005-08-28 02:10:18 PM  
I just changed the link

 
ZAZ [TotalFark] 2005-08-28 02:10:22 PM  
AIRBORNE DEBRIS WILL BE WIDESPREAD...AND MAY INCLUDE HEAVY ITEMS SUCH AS HOUSEHOLD APPLIANCES AND EVEN LIGHT VEHICLES.

What about cows?

 
nativefloridian 2005-08-28 02:10:48 PM  
I'm glad the NWS has made the "Run for the hills!!!" message official, finally. Should have done it earlier.

 
Displayed 50 of 3416 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | » | Last


[Continue Farking]