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(AP) Amusing One-hundred-pound woman eats six-pound burger   (apnews.myway.com) divider line 159
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24166 clicks; posted to Main » on 15 Jan 2005 at 1:44 AM   |  Make this a Fark FavoriteFavorite    |   share: Share on OMGTWITTER WEB2.0share on StumbleUponshare on Facebook  more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!

159 Comments   (+0 »)


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GavinTheAlmighty 2005-01-14 10:22:10 PM  
I know there's a "meat between buns" joke in there somewhere...

I hope that if I ever get famous, it isn't for eating.

 
ElectroSnizzle 2005-01-14 10:26:17 PM  
with or without helmet?

 
oddballgeek 2005-01-14 10:40:22 PM  
that actually would for once warrant a "all i got was this stupid t-shirt" t-shirt.

 
Wopat 2005-01-14 11:28:13 PM  
The article fails to touch on the really important details: Is she hot?

 
ksdanj [TotalFark] 2005-01-14 11:45:11 PM  
Sounds like she took all those "eat a sammich" comments to heart.

 
photoshop-challenged 2005-01-14 11:54:18 PM  
I imagine she annihiliated a toilet after that. I would have.

 
Wopat 2005-01-14 11:55:38 PM  
photoshop-challenged

Whoa, whoa, whoa. That doesn't happen. Girls just don't do that. Do they?! My god, my entire world is crashing down!

 
photoshop-challenged 2005-01-15 12:05:42 AM  
Wopat
Unfortunately, when I was around 8 years old, I learned that girls do in fact poop. No one told me otherwise until then.

I have not been the same since.

 
schief2 [TotalFark] 2005-01-15 12:20:17 AM  
Holy crap. She ate six percent of her body weight in burgers.

It's things like this that make me proud to be an American. god bless the USA!



*salutes the flag, sniffles back a tear*

 
GavinTheAlmighty 2005-01-15 12:20:37 AM  
My female housemates can let out turds that peel the paint off our bathroom walls. It's gratifying to know that they're as flawed as I am, but so disturbing because now I can safely and honestly say that I know what my housemates' colons smell like following bean stew night. I had to light candles in my own room to handle the funk.

But back to the point in question, yes, this 100 pound woman most certainly would have dropped the fecal bomb on the porcelain throne. Especially with a whole onion on it. Fecality!

 
michaeltrout 2005-01-15 12:21:23 AM  
Wopat:

Whoa, whoa, whoa. That doesn't happen. Girls just don't do that. Do they?! My god, my entire world is crashing down!

You're kidding, right? You honestly don't think that girls don't poop? Of course girls poop! It just smells like roses and bubbles come floating out.

 
gopher321 [TotalFark] 2005-01-15 12:22:23 AM  
Someone offer her a "wafer-thin mint".

 
agreywolf42 2005-01-15 01:19:25 AM  

 
Calmamity [TotalFark] 2005-01-15 01:23:12 AM  
One hundred pound woman eats six pound burger...

now looks like ten pounds of sausage in a five pound bag.

 
BloodyL 2005-01-15 01:38:01 AM  
I guess she weighs one hundred and six pounds now.

 
Monaco 2005-01-15 01:47:52 AM  
There was also 5 pounds of "fixins". She now weighs 111 pounds. Zoinks.

 
MikeXpop 2005-01-15 01:51:20 AM  
Wait, wasn't there supposed to be a special prize? This sounds just like the prizes for the 3 pound burger they offer...

 
The Fonz [TotalFark] 2005-01-15 01:53:56 AM  
If it were, "1100 Pound Woman Eats 6 Pound Burger", I would have been calling my sister-in-law to congratulate her. She's piggy that way. She farts and causes hurricanes. Really! And she likes to live under bridges. In Minneapolis there are entire communities of people that eat burgers and live under bridges. I didn't get her anything for Christmas this year. I should have gotten her a cell phone. That's the only way I could call her I guess...

 
TallAsFark 2005-01-15 01:54:38 AM  
Holy crap. I think the cheese alone would be enough to do me in.

I still want to try.

 
festus [TotalFark] 2005-01-15 01:57:11 AM  
Wow, so how much man-lumber can this woman take?

At 100 lbs she's likely pretty petite.

Imagine her skewered on 14".

 
silver_fox 2005-01-15 01:57:16 AM  
I feel sorry for the toilet...

 
motherbuster 2005-01-15 02:00:49 AM  
...John Candy unavailable for comment.

 
KnickKnolte 2005-01-15 02:00:55 AM  
It would take forever to collect enough snot to make a six pound booger. DNRTFA

 
doombot 2005-01-15 02:01:53 AM  
That's a true American!

God bless her!


 
understimulated 2005-01-15 02:02:32 AM  
TallAsFark

With you on the cheese thing. And a cup of mayo? Right there's my caloric intake for about 5 days.

And folks, if you haven't RTFA, take a few minutes from your busy day. It's more impressive than it sounds.

Also:

Kate Stelnick of Princeton, NJ and the College of NJ: Will you marry me?


// My mom went to The College of New Jersey when it was good ol' Trenton State - nice to see they're doing her proud. Go Lions!

 
PrinceValium 2005-01-15 02:03:49 AM  
I'd hit it. Sight unseen.

 
RockIsDead 2005-01-15 02:04:21 AM  
No one can work the stomach muscles like an anorexic.

 
doombot 2005-01-15 02:04:52 AM  
GIS for food eating contest:


 
granolasteak [TotalFark] 2005-01-15 02:05:14 AM  
So I'm the only one who finds these kinds of contests asinine in the worst way? I'd feel better about sh*t like this if the owner had asked all the spectators to hand over a few bucks each for some good cause in exchange for watching this girl hork down 11 lbs of food she didn't need.

What a waste.

 
PrinceValium 2005-01-15 02:05:42 AM  

 
jondular 2005-01-15 02:06:03 AM  
Puke me baby!....................nah, doesn't turn me on!

 
TemperedEdge 2005-01-15 02:07:51 AM  
Let's hear it for TemperedEdge's hometown of Clearfield, PA, for finally making news worthy of Fark!

I've seen this thing. WAY too much for me. But here's TemperedEdge's Challange to any and all Farkers:

Come to Clearfield. Go to Denny's Beer Barrel Pub (just off of US Route 322, at the intersection of 322 and State Route 879. Eat the 6lb. burger. Not only will Denny give you all the crap this chica got, but I'll throw in ONE YEAR of TOTALFARK if you can do it faster than this hero of a woman!

And yes, that's serious. Drew, hold me to this.

 
God-is-a-Taco 2005-01-15 02:08:52 AM  
I guess it makes sense. The smallest men tend to win the eating contests. It might as well be the same for women.

 
Wake 'n Bake 2005-01-15 02:10:41 AM  
Anyone else wonder if she had the munchies?

 
Bill_Wick's_Friend 2005-01-15 02:11:23 AM  
Stelnick got a special certificate, a T-shirt and other prizes and - as advertised - Leigey picked up the $23.95 tab for the burger.




...plus she gets a souvenier picture of two men posing with her next bowel movement.

 
Nuke Laloosh 2005-01-15 02:12:35 AM  
100 pounds?

she must be hot!

 
advres 2005-01-15 02:14:02 AM  
HAHA... my co-worker got owned

 
computer_user 2005-01-15 02:16:08 AM  
Here she is


 
tychno 2005-01-15 02:18:15 AM  
PrinceValium

I'd hit it.

And the burger too. Crigey thats huge.

 
Fett56 2005-01-15 02:20:40 AM  
I'll be the first to say it. I'd hit it.

 
Fett56 2005-01-15 02:21:15 AM  
damn you tychno, damn you!

 
codewritinfool 2005-01-15 02:24:17 AM  
That thing is bigger than her head!

 
GavinTheAlmighty 2005-01-15 02:27:05 AM  
She has accomplished nothing by doing this except showing the world she can be a glutton on command. I am disgusted.

 
granolasteak [TotalFark] 2005-01-15 02:31:24 AM  
GavinTheAlmighty:

She has accomplished nothing by doing this except showing the world she can be a glutton on command. I am disgusted.

Glad to see I'm not the only one who thinks like this.

 
never odd or even 2005-01-15 02:37:15 AM  
It seems that people who win these eating contests are either really big and fat or tiny and skinny.

 
aujoshh 2005-01-15 02:37:28 AM  
Doing a quick Facebook search (because I'm creepy like that), she apparently has a large mouth, because it's open wide in her picture.

/i'm done now

 
regcrusher 2005-01-15 02:38:43 AM  
Obligatory:


 
4NdR01D 2005-01-15 02:40:26 AM  
i knew a skinny girl that could fit a whole macdonalds hamburger in her mouth in one bite. yeah, she kinda had a reputation, if you know what i mean.

 
datafox 2005-01-15 02:40:50 AM  
Wow, never thought the burger would be the same width as her.

 
influx 2005-01-15 02:41:02 AM  
I'd hit it (with my 6 lb piece of meat).

 
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