Indiana University study shows that having children significantly decreases your IQ

...and your hair.

I blame recently stupified children's programming the likes of Caillou, Teletubbies, and most importantly, Boo-Bah.

now now untrustworthy...if it wasnt for the "Wal-Mart families" you'd have nothing to post....you should be giving them their props *snicker* .....why diss them?..your already paying for their shopping pleasure

This is why liberals are so smart.

We believe in ending unwanted pregnancies while the anti-choice people drop kid after kid.

/wave I Live 5mins from IU!
Email me if anyone is as bored as me in this stupid town

Well Duh...

Good use of the tag.

Oh how I wish this wasn't from a satirical source...

/still agree with the "findings" 100%

It only seems to lower the IQ of the parents because the children have the brain damage.

/Shameless Cosby ref.

Nah, it's just the lack of sleep thing...

Flashman73

Booooooooooooo!
Booooooooooooo!

Do you hang out at pre-schools and tell kids Santa is fake too?

/Was wondering who would be the first to set everyone straight...

This explains why every parent thinks their child is the smartest kid in class or the best athlete, even if that child is as dumb as a box of rocks or needs a calendar to time their forty-yard dash. People who before were intelligent and open-minded turn into raving lunatics who want to blame a teacher or coach every time their mediocre child fails, said Lee.

funny man :D

After I became a parent, I could feel my brain becoming mushier. Whereas before I would have had my face in a book or doing something else similarly engaging, now I was in the constant company of a bag of organs and nerves, incapable of any but the most rudimentary communication.

That said, we wanted (and want) that child, and are grateful that she is a healthy and smart 11-year-old today. The trade was worth it.

Yeah, being a parent will bring your IQ down a bit. But remember that a sense of perspective is worth 30 IQ points!

I don't suppose the "lowered IQ" could have anything to do with still dealing with the stress of a 6 month old infant, now could it?

The researcher's comments and common sense lead me to believe this was some flawed-ass research.

Haha, man untrustworthy and Red Donkey, ya'll sure are stupid.

Stupid farking breeders.

The research sounded relatively above board until the rather harsh and unscientific (yet semi-funny) comments the research made at the end.

I married someone with a 5-yr old and I fully agree that the objectivity about "my" child went out the window, but as KerwoodDerby stated, the ability to see the world as a child and simply "play" after work is worth it. I'd rather come home from a stressful day and bust out the Bob the Builder or Lego sets versus watching our depressing Detroit-area 6 o'clock news (e.g., murder, rape, murder, arson, etc).

ok, everyone meet me back here in 7 months and I'll let you know how much it dropped (if at all). Me thinks lack of sleep may play a role in it tho.

Is it possible that the parents who were once free thinking individuals with developing minds and lives begin to live vicariously through their children and lose motivation to evolve their brains through learning?

And of course, being THG, it's all Barbara Streisand.

I call shennigans.

If you go to the Institute's webpage, there is no mention of this study anywhere.

Hey Jaywalker,

Hee Hee Hee. Click back on the Hoosier Gazette and read a few more articles.

Another study finds many FARKers still haven't realized that the Hoosier Gazette isn't a real news source, that it's satire.

dan_in_oakland If it's a new study they probably haven't updated their web site yet. What's the publication date?

Way to go, jwa007!!

Dad is great! Gives us the Chocolate Cake!!

/conniption

I believe that you really don't teach children, they actually take information from you, leaving you with less. Every time I spend time with the kids, I feel a little closer to the inevitable adult-onset retardation.

Red Donkey: This is why liberals are so smart.

We believe in ending unwanted pregnancies while the anti-choice people drop kid after kid.

So, taken to its logical conclusion, John Wayne Gacy = Genius + Liberal Icon? So what if the kids he killed were in the 54th trimester or so? He was exercising "choice"!

Red Donkey
Flashman73
Booooooooooooo!

Hehe... sorry, I was a party pooper there wasn't I?

Well, that being said, can anybody else name a good source of satire, aside from TheOnion?

If anybody says "TheToque", I will strangle them... >:o(

Fox News?

dan-in-oakland
jamspoon

its a spoof.



ps. GO IU. 1-0, baby.

Since the article is now known to be satire let's look at a possible inspiration for the story.

My parents never smiled, because I had brain damage. My wife and I don't smile because our children are loaded with it. Oh, my parents smile now, whenever they come over to the house and see how much trouble I'm having. Oh, they have a ball! 'Having some trouble, eh, son?'

For all you that believe this, IT IS SATIRE.
Go to the "About Us" page.

Not as funny as the Onion 'Study Reveals: Babies are Stupid' article. Presumably unauthorised copy here:

http://www.physics.mcgill.ca/~arobic/funny/babies.html

I love when satire doesn't have the tag so we can see how many people argue. :D

Heh, great observation CatPeople I totally agree.

Hoozier Gazette is a poor shadow of The Onion. There was no study, nor is there a dead tycoon leaving money in his will for the building of a fun park in Iceland, or a man bbqing dogs. These posts are a simple attempt at getting page views by these online trash papers. Funny, yes, but a serious source of news? Of course not.

I see it the other way, significantly decreased I.Q. causes having children.

"Hoozier Gazette is a poor shadow of The Onion. There was no study, nor is there a dead tycoon leaving money in his will for the building of a fun park in Iceland, or a man bbqing dogs. These posts are a simple attempt at getting page views by these online trash papers. Funny, yes, but a serious source of news? Of course not."

Figured that out all by yourself?

I don't know if the writer is so qualified to talk about intelligence. It's clear the description of the experiment is meant to sound official looking, but for some reason he has the researchers throw away a perfect control group.

god, if i have kids, id be walking around goind "durrr durr" and drooling.

didn't RTFA, but freom the comments its satire.

I will say though, that another article I read, they said all the great scientists had their greatest acheivements when they were single, between the ages of 20-30, and that the ones that did get married, they didnt have any scientific achievements after that.

greyson they said all the great scientists had their greatest acheivements when they were single, between the ages of 20-30, and that the ones that did get married, they didnt have any scientific achievements after that.

Indeed?

Einstein was married in '03. He published his five most famous papers in '05. These included his papers on the special theory of relativity and the photoelectric effect; the release of electrons from metal when light shines on it, for which he won a Nobel Prize in physics.

Why is trolling bannination fodder, but posting satirical links with non-satirical headlines Ok?

Isn't that the same as trolling?

Anyone else wonder what "average" means if everyone's kid is supposedly "above-average"? Even if you're very intelligent yourself, your children do not necessarily inherit the same base level intelligence, leading to hilarious things like the off-campus job postings I get from my Ivy school from alum who want tutors for their (private-school educated)children who are "very bright, but learn differently" or "brilliant mind, but needs special motivation" or "creative thinkers who organize homework poorly." Or the place where I worked this summer, where if your kid is lousy (or just average) at school and can't qualify as dyslexic, ADD, or anything else reasonably established, you can pay for a $1500 evaluation to prove that your kid just has a "different kind of intelligence!" Timmy isn't average; just "otherly gifted." Of course, no one is taking middle or lower class underachievers for these special, quasi-medical exams--they're just getting steered to the local vo-tech.

I had truble reding this story.

WOOHOO!
I am so smart S M R A T I mean uh S M A R T

finally those without kids are vindicated, even if it is a pinko commie rag

Remember that article that said looking at boobies was good for men's health? That was another hoax that I think was actually right on target, inadvertantly or not.

Cloudboy: There's nothing stopping anyone from dumping out the pile of Legos at any age. Having children just makes a culturally convenient excuse. There is also nothing mandating anyone to have to watch the news.

That being said, I just recently saw a really smart woman from some forums I read, who was raising her step-kids, get pregnant and have her kid, only to return to the forums and be...kind of dumb. Before she could talk about interesting things, and now she wrote a webpage showing the design of the nursery, as if the kid was saying the stuff. All that 'Oh, mommy made me a mural so I can look at birdies,' crap. Definitely sad.

I've always said that my children have their mother's smarts.

/coz I still have mine.

Angostura

I almost pissed myself when I hit this line in the onion article you linked

According to Howell, almost 60 percent of the infants tested in this manner eventually drowned.

The onion does have some great stuff

Having children changes your priorities. People who score well on tests (IQ test included) are frequently people who are invested in trying to figure out how the test-makers think. Once you have children, it becomes less interesting for a person to invest in the thinking patterns of anyone but their child. As well, personal achievement, in the form of races, tests, etc. become less important than the achievements of your family.

There are things important to you before you have kids and things important to you afterward. They are different things.

On the other hand, having at least one parent raises the IQ of a child.