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Farked already.

Here it is in its full cut-n-paste glory, from right here.

Warning to anyone considering the Limp Bizkit auditions
Zeromus-X
Member
Posts: 394
Registered: May 2001
posted February 02, 2002 09:28 AM
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** Warning. This will be explicit and long. **

Some of you may have heard about the Limp Bizkit guitarist search. Basically, the band has been "touring" the country visiting Guitar Center stores, holding auditions for a new guitarist to replace the one who left the band.

The deal is this. From 7:00 to 11:00 AM you can sign up for a slot to try out that day. The tryouts are from 10:00 AM to 5:00 PM. During this time, they take you into a room to play your stuff. At the end of that time, you leave. They call three to ten people at 5:30 to come back to the place and play in front of Limp Bizkit. Out of those people, one is selected to return at 9:00 to jam with the band, and anyone who participated is invited to watch -- a free concert, basically.

So I arrive there, with a copy of our band's full CD in hand. I'm with a friend who wants to try out, so I go ahead and sign up too. We get there at 5:00 AM and we're pretty far back in line. Not incredibly bad though. Free donuts and coffee, so all isn't too bad.

10:00 rolls around. The line is moving slow, but that's to be expected. We finally get up around the corner of the building to the front of the line at about noon. Current total time there: 7 hours.

Get to the table, and I notice there's a waiver you have to sign. No problem, standard stuff. Then I notice it's a three page contract. This contract basically said that if you play, you must sign the contract. Okay. No big deal here either. So I keep reading it. An interesting note. Anything you play can NOT be copyright, and can be used by Limp Bizkit in audio, video, or recorded form of any sort. Other big words which basically translated to the fact that if you play something, they are fully authorized to steal it and use it on a CD. The artist agrees to zero compensation and zero rights over the track, and will get their name in the liner notes "if possible."

This didn't sit well, as me and the guy I was with were planning on playing something we wrote. So we sign it and decide to make something up. An annoyance at the very least, but we'd waited seven hours to get this far.

Then we got to stand in the parking lot for another two hours. We finally get inside at about 2:30, where it's another 30 minute wait for your turn. Current total time there: 10 hours.

So then we get the "rules". They are outlined for us straight out. No guitar solos. No playing cover songs. No playing copyrighted material. No playing Limp Bizkit songs. This effectively means that you're forced to play something that you made up, but don't have a copyright for. You may see where this is going.

Entering the room, there's one guy. He's got a mute button under his foot. His job is to make sure you follow the rules. If you break any, you get muted and kicked out immediately. So I go in, and there's one amp for me to plug into, and the settings are turned to "mud". It sounded awful, and was not pleasing to the ears. And it was loud enough that the awfulness didn't go away for some time. Then comes another fun part.

"You have 60 seconds to play. Starting now."

One farking minute?!


So since the thing I'd been planning was two minutes and thirty seconds, I cut most of the parts out. Kept it under time (about 57 seconds), but it still sounded worse than a handful of ass due to that beautiful amplifier (hmm). And I leave the room and the line proceeds. We're told that the winners will be announced at 5:30. And that we are to remain in the front parking lot until that time. No leaving. Period. This makes for unhappy people. We're talking 200+ people here, plus any wives / girlfriends / husbands / boyfriends / family / friends which accompanied them. But what can you do? We stay until 5:30. Total current time there: 12 hours, 30 minutes.

5:30 rolls around. People are getting ansi. The clock keeps ticking, and it's 6:00 before we notice anything going on. Guitar Center management flags all their people and security to come inside to discuss something. They go in there, and the guy in charge walks out with a megaphone. After getting everyone's attention, the guy on the megaphone speaks:

"he competition has been called off effective immediately and will not be rescheduled. The band will not be performing with nor for anyone. They most likely will not be signing autographs. This is beyond our control, but we are ending it."

The guy then proceeds to enter back inside the huge glass doors, and two cops stand behind the door. They lock the building. After about an hour, most have gone home. The radio station is completely screwed, having brought their entire broadcast booths out to cover it. Everyone is very, very pissed. Me and the other guy stayed awhile to figure out what was going on. It's now about 7:30 PM.

Limp Bizkit now has over 200 guitar parts, written by various artists around here, which are unowned and not copyrighted. Limp Bizkit now owns these riffs. Limp Bizkit just stole 200 pieces of material right out from under these guitarists' noses, myself included. If I'd played something off our CD, I would be ABSOLUTELY pissed. I *am* absolutely pissed. They have completely ripped off hundreds of people, and they're getting away with it because they can. They're on their way to their next stop, and the radio station here has given out request line numbers for the stations down there for us to call and let them know what's happening over the course of this event, to warn them. But people aren't going to buy it. They're going to go and get their shiat stolen too.

To add insult to injury, Guitar Center ran a contest where the winner would get to watch the band play even if they didn't play guitar. One person and a friend. That person also won an autographed Gibson Les Paul Studio ($1500+ guitar) by the band. She showed up after a near 200 mile drive to the area. Guitar Center told her that the band refused to acknowledge the contest at this point, and so not only did she drive three and a half hours for no performance (which she took her ten year old kid to see as his first concert), but apparently the guitar wasn't given either. All because the band wanted to be one giant collective asshole.

If any of you know anyone who's considering going to these tryouts, show them this message. If they have any questions they can contact me directly. I'm doing everything I possibly can to make sure this does NOT happen to anyone else. It's not my stuff I'm concerned about -- our CD is copyrighted completely and legally -- but I'm guessing 90% of the local bands who passed Durst a copy of their CD are going to be farked. Many bands, especially newer local ones, don't have the money or know-how to copyright their stuff, and by giving it to them tonight, they just basically tossed them a new Limp Bizkit CD if Fred wants to do that. I wouldn't be surprised if he copyrights their shiat tomorrow.

It hurts to look around and see hundreds of people get excited at the chance to be able to make something of their guitar work; to have a shot at being in a popular band, making a living doing what they dream of. Fred Durst and Limp Bizkit are taking that dream and farking it over. And anyone who wasn't there who just caught the coverage at noon and 5:00 on the news just think everything is perfect. Happy Fred Durst in front of the cameras behind the place, fenced off, saying how good the turnout is and how happy everyone seems, and talking about all the great shiat he's hearing. That man is the true meaning of a music label representative. He's the perfect salesman and nice guy in front of the media, and turns around and screws everyone involved in the ass without having to take any hit in his overall popularity, and possibly gaining a shiat ton of new music in the process that he's ripped from people.

Not many things piss me off, but I'm pissed off. I'm not the only one. All sorts of "this band is playing tonight at this place, and they'd like me to announce to Fred Durst that if you're still in the area and you come to this venue, you will be able to see what a REAL band is like -- right before the real band beats your skull in." This radio station is sick of the shiat from this band, and so are its listeners. If this keeps happening, I wouldn't be surprised if some shiat goes down somewhere really damn soon.

there is no entry for a purpose perhaps? I know! Limp Bizkit sucks! Why on earth would they need to audition a guitarist? It's not like they have any actual riffs/musical talent in their songs? If they were smart they would save some money and just have Fred play one chord at the beginning, put it on reverb and have it repeat for the next 3 1/2 minutes...

Limp Bizkit...yeah, they suck

Wintermute:

Do you post at mrcranky.com? What's your handle?

CK

http://www.buddyhead.com

Fred got hit in the face with a pie by some guy in Clackamas, Oregon. Hahaha, Clackamas.

CK: I'm Screwtape.

I think it was taken here.

After reading Wintermute's post, I hate them even more now.

WOW.

He puts the same album out tweice, then farks his fans up the ass to get material for the third. Nice. Real nice.

limp bizkit would have to steal to get some good music

Anyone suprised? Anyone? I'll give you a minute to speak up.... Hmmm I hear some crickets chirping back there.... Anyone? Anyone? Beuller?


I guess not.... Limp Bizkit is Nsynch for people who are too cool to like Nsynch, but still need something terrible to listen to

Spinal Tap "held" open auditions for drummers as part of their announcement of the second movie. They just put an ad in the back of Variety, saying their "band" needed Drummer, ans stated a place and time. Van Morrison showed up wearing a silver flame retardant suit.

I think Red Hot Chili Peppers did something similar for a new Guitarist, after the original onOD'ed.

Phew,that's some bad shiat.Thank god I never wasted my cash on their sorry ass music.

FishBulb-N'sync is actually better than Limp Bizkit.

Oh, and feel free to post that wherever you see fit... like, for instance, on their fan boards...

Why are you all getting up in LB's biznass? They are obviously famous enough to do whatever they want. So what if they are raping all the talent of today's musicians. How much talent can any Limp Bizkit fan have anyway?

Here's Google's list of Limp Bizkit fan sites: http://directory.google.com/Top/Arts/Music/Bands_and_Artists/L/Limp_Bizkit/Fan _Pages/


Find a few good ones and post on. We won't get much done spreading the word to people who already hate Limp Bizkit.

Durst sucks my balls.

I now have respect for Wes Borland, or whatever his name is, for hearing that he was only in Limp Bizkit for the money. At least we know he thought they sucked too.

The whole audition thing is complete bullshiat. Having to sign a contract just to audition?!?! I heard that assclown on the radio say that he heard a few people he might use in some other projects. I'm amazed they have fans with actual musical talents in the first place. Sad thing is, the poor bastards are probably gonna have their auditions sampled in his projects.

Tis a sad place in the music world. The only thing I can think of that's as bad as this is the whole Dead Kennedys debacle going on. Kick their ass, Jello--for the fans.

There's something called an "unconscionable contract." Basically, you're forced into signing it, but the terms are so onerous, no one in their right mind would otherwise sign it. This probably fits. Bottom line: an unconscionable contract is unenforcable. If Durst rips your shiat off, he still has to pay.

rest be assured..this will wind up all over 92.3 krock tommorow night on the cane and cabbie show...they both read fark, and have the biggest fanbase of almost any rock radio dj's in the country..neither like fred much so i bet they cant wait to get this on the air....hell they got out that linkin park was formed like a boyband....that i found hilarious...

Dapharmer: Cane and Cabbie actually hate him AND read Fark? I could imagine them doing one of those amazing things, but BOTH?! Now that is truly magnificent. Learning new things every day...

they've been taking bets from callers lately on how much longer bizquik is gonna be around..and how bad their next cd is gonna tank

Like anyone who could actually play guitar well would actually want to be in this band for any reason other than money?

Wow, I should start listening to Cane and Cabbie some more in that case.

u've already missed the let's bash on creed days...now they are being all nice to creed..i think cane started goin out drinkin with the guy or something..couldn't figure it out.... but for like 4 weeks they kept playing this bit from an interview or an ad where he's like, "i always wanted to do something good for the world..and my music does just that"..they even made a lil song out of the clip...

Yeah I listened to 'em back in the Creed-bashing days. Does Cane still bash on Papa Roach? I remember he stopped one of their songs from playing one time, quite humorous.

i dont even think he plays em nemore

Kibo, even though the contract is probably ineffective because the promised consideration (i.e. a free concert) was never delivered, that doesn't mean that these folks are in the free and clear.

Even if Durst doesn't use any of the material, he is still sitting on 200 cd's of material that these bands may put out. If any of the songs become a hit, Durst then has an argument that the copyright has been assigned to him. If he brings suit, the band will be faced with potentially huge legal fees and expert witness costs ($100,000-$250,000 if taken all the way through trial) and the risk that they could lose ALL of the royalties if Durst's argument is bought by the jury. The likely scenario is that they settle by giving Durst a percentage of the royalties.

Dirty, dirty, dirty.

The contract was voided when they ended the event.
If you played, and they took your stuff and used it on a CD... You can burn them legally.
Class Action Lawsuit?

i always thought fred durst was a scummy piece of shiat...he's the next vanilla ice..gonna rip off someone big's song and say this is completely different. mine goes doo doo dah doo doo dah.. theirs is doo doo dah doo doo doh...

That farking figures. Dude, Borland won't even return Red cap's emails. (BWAHAHAHA.... waah waah, Durst. You lost your butt buddy)

What assclowns. What gets me, is they *actually* came to Fresno. First fricking place on the map for their little "find us a new biatch" tour.

I saw a taped interview from Wes Borland (their first guitarist), and he said the reason he left the band is that he felt like he sold out! Isn't that great? Someone in the music world actually has a conscience! Whoo ha!



Wes Borland's conscience.

People actually like Limp Bizkit!!??

These guys make Boyzone look talented and cutting edge.

This probably isn't safe for work, so I'll just post the link. Couldn't find a good shot of a German Shepherd, so I used a Rottweiler. I figure Fred's a manly sort of guy, and would go for the biggest dog he could find, anyway.

Fred Durst taking it from a Rottweiler

Let's try that again.
Fred Durst taking it from a Rottweiler

I read this same thing on another message board, and I'm sorry to say, as much as I hate limp bizkit, I won't believe it until I see the story from a reliable source... This is the kind of thing that someone who sits around and listens to Manowar all day would write, just to make people hate limp bizkit even more...

Don't you think you'd hear about this on MTV News or something if it really happened?...

And how could limp bizkit make someone sign a contract saying that anything they played at the audition, the band legally owned... that just doesn't make any sense...

Hahahahahahahahaha Don't you think you would hear this on MTV news? I won't believe this til I hear it from a reliable source? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA right, like MTV would bag on their little Limp Cash machine. Funny dude, funny.

Samtallica: You don't honestly believe that MTV would piss on it's own golden boy, do you?

ahaaaaahaaaahaaaa!!!!

Bonobo62: You sir, win. Congratulations :)

My friend passed by one of these tryouts. He called it "poser central, blue hair as far as the eye could see in either direction".

Samtallica = Metallica, no?

Suddenly your comment makes sense. You're obviously a limp bisuit fan and afraid to say so after the bashing they've taken. I mean seriously man, metallica and limp biscuit are practically the same band.

I'm not kidding, ie no sarcasm here.

Really. They might as well be the same band. To me at least...

I was at the SLC Guitar Center when this went down. The manager is a friend of mine so I watched some of the auditions on the closed circuit cameras from the back. I'm a tad too...old...to put it nicely...and slow to audition for Bizkit (if it was BB King or Jimmy Buffett I'd be there!). The person running the auditions was a record company exec, the band members never even put in an appearance until the jam later.

All I can say to the person who wrote this diatribe, though, is welcome to the music business. Contracts like that from record companies are exactly what you can expect for your entire career. The kind of pressure that you're under in a one minute audition is exactly what it's going to be like, if you can't hack that, you're not ready. Sounds harsh but simply put it's the truth. They got no time for prima donnas and whiners, you don't wanna get with the program, they'll find someone else. There are truly VERY few real artists out there are aren't expendable. Wes Borland wasn't.

Let me also put your mind at rest about the contract. That's pro forma record company bullsh*t. They have no interest whatsoever in 150 mediocre one minute solos from amateur guitar players. They're not even going to keep those tapes, and I doubt that anyone in the band even ever heard more than six or eight of them.

Further, I'd be willing to bet that Bizkit will not end up recruiting anyone from any of those auditions. That was a promotional tour, and nothing more. A chance for fans to show how much they love their Bizkit. If that had been for real they wouldn't have done it like that.