FARK.com: Business links -- Archives for 2009-07-26

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Sun July 26, 2009

Source	Fark Headline		Comments
		More people having sex in their cars or in public parks in Britain, a phenomenon experts attribute to the recession. Bonus use of the word "knackered" while explaining the rise (dailystar.co.uk)	(21)
		Real estate agents with an 8th grade education are pissed off that real estate appraisers with a 4th grade education aren't valuing homes in the same half-assed way they used to (online.wsj.com)	(76)
		Coca-Cola launches Vio, a carbonated milk drink with four "natural" flavors and all the sugar you've come to expect from Coca-Cola. Plus fat (timesonline.co.uk)	(59)
(CFO.com)		Five companies in the world control $296 trillion in derivatives contracts. Good luck bailing them out (cfo.com)	(57)

Sat July 25, 2009

	Recession spurs 20 percent increase in sales of bicycles (telegraph.co.uk)	(48)
(Calculated Risk)	California hopes to restore health to its pension fund by doubling down on "potentially high-risk investments." If that doesn't work, there's a guy with a tux and a martini over at the canasta table who looks like a real patsy (calculatedriskblog.com)	(30)
(Some Guy)	The headline that does not mean what you think it means (myfoxphoenix.com)	(58)
	TGIF everyone - unless you work at one of the seven banks that just got taken over by the FDIC. That brings the total to 64, for those of you watching at home (finance.yahoo.com)	(23)

Fri July 24, 2009

	Gas prices keep going up despite supply glut. In other news, the Associated Press is pretending that the laws of supply and demand have anything to do with gas prices (google.com)	(46)
(Some Guy)	Four sports leagues sue Delaware over sports gambling, trying to protect Lost Wages (nbcsports.msnbc.com)	(23)
	Freudian headline of the day: Hershey's push into high-end chocolate is bittersweet (money.cnn.com)	(46)
	The seven habits of highly disengaged employees (examiner.com)	(95)
	Top States for Business in America. Guess who made last place? Oh, you betcha (cnbc.com)	(117)
	Oil remains above $67 a barrel on Sarah Palin's pronouncement that oil is God's gift to us to help us prevent global warming (upi.com)	(11)
	Starbuck's store changes name, gives customers exactly what they want... even more expensive coffee than before (seattletimes.nwsource.com)	(42)
	Teen billed $23 quadrillion for a train ticket. Good thing she didn't get a pack of smokes too (1010wins.com)	(78)
(Some Guy)	Hot linkers unite: The AP is coming after you (mediaweek.com)	(47)
(Redfin)	The entire housing crisis summed up in one house in Palm Springs. Sold for $119,000 in 2003, $200,000 in 2004, $350,000 in 2005, $450,000 in 2006, foreclosed by the bank in 2008, sold for $32,500 in 2009 (redfin.com)	(65)
	Netflix second quarter profits up 22% on news that people don't like spending $13 on a movie ticket (online.wsj.com)	(55)
	Boeing knows how to fix wing-body flaw, but can't say how long it will take to fix. Still confident they will make their 2063 launch target (upi.com)	(12)

Thu July 23, 2009

(Some Guy)	Fatass sues Applebee's for making her ass fat (app.com)	(88)
	Buffett earns $2 billion buying Goldman Sachs warrants. That's a lot of country captain chicken (bloomberg.com)	(31)
	Canada's recession is over, recovery nascent. I don't know what the fark nascent means, but GO CANADA, WOO WOO. Suck it yanks (theglobeandmail.com)	(115)
	"10 Myths about the Subprime Crisis." List strangely omits "the bailouts are working" and "we've learned our lesson" (businessinsider.com)	(127)
	Xerox profit falls 35% Xerox profit falls 35% Xerox profit falls 35% (online.wsj.com)	(21)
	Why raising the minimum wage will hurt workers and worsen the economy (reason.com)	(126)
	Dow Jones over 9,000 for the first time since the start of the year. This is bad news... for Obama (finance.yahoo.com)	(227)
	Ford's second-quarter loss of $600 million beats analysts' expections (bloomberg.com)	(54)
	Ford's second quarter profit of $2.3 billion beats analysts' expectations (online.wsj.com)	(27)
	New York Times Co: "I don't want to go on the cart. I'm feeling better" (chron.com)	(9)
	What do you get for burying your company in a $14 billion mountain of debt, making it a takeover target? 74 MILLION dollars (guardian.co.uk)	(58)
(Real Business)	In the wake of Dave Carroll's country-western Youtube hit, United Airlines sees stock price plunge ten per cent, dog die, car break down, woman leave (realbusiness.co.uk)	(109)
	Executives receive one-third of all pay in the US (alternet.org)	(178)
	Hyundai, once the biggest joke on four wheels, is now the fifth-largest auto group in the world and just had its most profitable quarter ever. GM, Chrysler sit at back of class, throw spitballs (sun-sentinel.com)	(57)

Wed July 22, 2009

(Some Minor Miner)	How does the reorganized Government/Union Motors treat their fellow USW union brothers at the only domestic supplier of palladium and rhodium? Why, by cancelling their contract in favor of suppliers located in Russia and South Africa of course (flatheadbeacon.com)	(44)
	Green shoots reach the newspaper industry as ad revenues improve from "totally shiatty" to "mostly crappy" (mediamemo.allthingsd.com)	(5)
	Vodafone tries to sell to the Web 2.0 crowd, achieves massive Vodafail (thelocal.de)	(22)
	Nearly two-thirds of airline passengers would be willing to stand during a one-hour flight if the flight were free, according to a Ryanair survey. Wait until they find out about the $100 in-flight cabin pressurization fee (news.com.au)	(121)
	Moody's cuts Southwest Airlines rating to C-35 (marketwatch.com)	(11)
	Chrysler to Match "Cash for Clunkers" incentive. Coincidentally, this is going to be Chrysler's new sales event motto (autos.yahoo.com)	(80)
	If you were wondering how Morgan Stanley managed a loss in this favorable banking environment, it might have something to do with spending 72% of their revenues on salaries and bonuses (businessinsider.com)	(28)
	Goldman repays TARP bailout, gives taxpayers 23% rate of return on their money (cnbc.com)	(285)
	"The Hardee's marketing team seems intent on pushing the boundaries at every turn whether we're talking about 'iced B-holes' or the company's attempts at turning hamburgers into sex objects" (blogs.newsobserver.com)	(29)
	Kaplan and Phoenix not among colleges that produce the best-paid graduates (finance.yahoo.com)	(164)
	100th anniversary of GM's Cadillac is highlighted by the launch of a new fragrance. Wait, what? (thestar.com)	(11)
	Burger King introduces angry burger to Japan, with photo of what angry Japanese may look like (msnbc.msn.com)	(34)
	Ford tops quality survey. Since Fark is filled with libs and hippies on the coasts sucking on Toyota's teat, this will not be greenlit (businessweek.com)	(109)
	Walmart uses the minimum mark-up law as a marketing tool. "We'd sell it for less but the state won't let us" (jsonline.com)	(39)
	Apple admits that it can't churn out shiny plastic fast enough for its hipster army (news.bbc.co.uk)	(20)
	Woman makes the mistake of buying a computer at Best Buy and believing the commercials that claim they have a "knowledgable staff." Her letter to the company's CEO is priceless (consumerist.com)	(319)
	Dominos pasta bowl in the commercial? Looks pretty delish. Actual product? Not so much (consumerist.com)	(68)
	Fiat loses $238.4m in Q2, starts thinking maybe that drunken Chrysler hookup was a mistake (chron.com)	(11)
	Whirlpool profits down, if only there was some word to describe the suckage (msnbc.msn.com)	(9)
	Morgan Stanley the latest bank to announce record profits after trillion-dollar bailout package. Just kidding - they managed a billion-dollar loss anyway (business.timesonline.co.uk)	(17)
	Seagate's revenue imitates its hard drives, crashes (theregister.co.uk)	(58)
	Hey minimum wage workers, we've got good news and we've got bad news, which do you want first? (cbsnews.com)	(118)
(Advertising Age)	McDonalds' obnoxiously omnipresent McCafe commercials selling its crap coffee may have inadvertently helped omnipresent Starbucks sell its obnoxiously priced crap coffee (adage.com)	(37)
(PSFK)	Companies on Facebook and Twitter tend to be more successful, companies on Fark tend to be more drunk (psfk.com)	(6)
(Hudson Register Star)	New York criticized for lack of slaughterhouses - even though they do have Newburgh, Troy, Utica and wherever the Mets play in September (registerstar.com)	(12)
	British pubs closing at the rate of 52 per week. That's a year's worth of weeks every week, which is a lot (news.bbc.co.uk)	(99)

Tue July 21, 2009

	Celebrities oppose close of Scotch whisky distillery, saying that they have a unique understanding of how important products that stink like an oilworker's socks but are consumed by a gullible public are (news.bbc.co.uk)	(43)
(SG)	Microsoft drops OMGIGP ad because it made people say, "OMGIGP" IRL. SRLSY (ethiopianreview.com)	(57)
(ZUG.com)	Man gets Verizon CEO's unlisted address, then visits his house to complain about Verizon's lack of security (zug.com)	(93)
	Former Home Depot and Chrysler CEO Bob Nardelli returns to Cerberus Capital as a business adviser. Which is like hiring a convicted child molestor to babysit your kids (reuters.com)	(12)
(apple.com)	Apple reports record earnings quarter on news that their primary demographics (college students and hipsters) never had jobs in the first place (apple.com)	(142)
	Bank of America expected to take a $12 billion charge on credit card losses. Somehow, CEO Ken Lewis still has a job (cnbc.com)	(17)
	"DuPont 2Q profit skids as chemical cuts back." If only they had some slippery substance, perhaps a coating, they could use to slide on (chron.com)	(2)
	State Farm's 47% rate increase? Court: "No can haz" (southflorida.sun-sentinel.com)	(26)
	Ryanair cuts London flight by 40% amid news that drunken fat guys don't need to spend £40 just to start fights in Spanish resort towns (news.yahoo.com)	(2)
	Latest proof that the economy sucks: bodies go unclaimed at morgues because relatives can't afford to bury them (abcnews.go.com)	(57)
	Following the lead of other airlines, Delta adds a $5 convenience fee for the privilege of paying fees in person. What's next? Paying $5 a month to look at ads? (ajc.com)	(137)
	Scottish fish factory announces closure. Where is your cod now? (news.bbc.co.uk)	(61)
	Problem: Greedy subprime brokers caused massive destruction in the housing market. Solution: Hire those same people to fix the problem. You can imagine how well this turns out (msnbc.msn.com)	(66)

Mon July 20, 2009

	Fark-ready story of the day: Luxury resort AIG execs went to days after accepting bailout foreclosed by Citigroup (latimes.com)	(64)
	Oil prices rise to $64 a barrel on news that oil prices will soon fall to $20 a barrel (upi.com)	(10)
	Human Genome is mutating into a profitable company (online.wsj.com)	(25)
(I'm a Mac)	Mac sales jump 16% in June. Suck it PC's (appleinsider.com)	(150)
	Like a teenage mother who's pregnant again, Wall Street learned nothing (forbes.com)	(120)
	GM considering three bids on Opel, including one from a hamster who wants to rename it "Oliver" (news.bbc.co.uk)	(25)
	Many banks misused their TARP funds by repaying debts, buying other banks, and investing in fur-bearing trout farms (washingtonpost.com)	(45)
	Kindle users: "Why did you delete 'Animal Farm' and '1984' from the catalog?" Amazon: "We are not evil Totalitarians." Users: "Ok, but when can..." Amazon: "NO MORE QUESTIONS, CITIZEN." (business.theatlantic.com)	(204)
	Hooters goes bust (news.com.au)	(86)
	High-rise developer claims his building's glass walls can withstand wind gusts of 327 mph. Because 331 mph would be a ludicrous speed (palmbeachpost.com)	(40)