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Sun June 29, 2008
(Reuters) Asinine The Fed will not be raising rates until after the election. Article includes this gem: "There is no hard evidence to support the widely held view that politics influences monetary policy." (26)
(AP) Ironic Chinese man pays $2.1 million to eat with Warren Buffet. The reason? To help end poverty (19)
(AOL) Ironic More and more people in Los Angeles living out of their cars (37)

Sat June 28, 2008
(news-leader.com) Spiffy Scapegoat #1081 for the rising price of oil: Your pension fund. Get off my portfolio (12)
(Some Guy) Asinine CEO receives $8.5 million bonus, 1/4 of company profits from 2007, after cutting more than half of US workforce (138)
(Wall Street Journal) Sad Steve and Barry's is reportably close to bankruptcy, citing overexpansion. Creditors expected to seize sweatshirts from colleges in Sheybogan and Walla Walla (58)
(ABC News) Obvious Car rental companies stuck with fleets of gas-guzzling SUVs that no one wants to drive, so they're pawning them off on unwilling customers as "upgrades" to mark special occasions, such as "It's Tuesday" (67)
(AP) Interesting Gates bids farewell with tears, wipes them away with a million dollar bill, which he then uses to light a cigar with before diving into vault filled with money. Or was that a Scrooge McDuck comic? (30)
(Marketwatch) Obvious If you had Morgan Stanley as the next Wall Street firm downgraded to 'run away', step up and collect your prize (15)
(Financial Times) Obvious Merrill Lynch mulls $15 billion fire sale weeks after their CEO said "Everything is fine. There's nothing to see here. Go back to your homes." (6)
(Yahoo) Scary If you need to fly anywhere, you should probably do so by the end of the year (71)

Fri June 27, 2008
(Wall Street Journal) Obvious Anheuser-Busch to trim almost 1,300 jobs in order to save $1 billion in costs. Horses also being pressured to improve productivity, aim (24)
(Wall Street Journal) Unlikely Ohio newspapers, tired of paying extortionate prices for AP articles available for free on the Web, decide to form exclusive OHNO agency for pooling coverage of news and not-news (7)
(MSNBC) Obvious Credit card companies realize that someone making $60,000 a year should not have a $30,000 credit limit (62)
(CFO Snafu) Sad Your feel-good Friday link: Creative things companies have done to tell their employees "You're fired" (74)
(Washington Times) Silly Coalition of 16,000 black and Hispanic churches urge federal regulators to reject proposed XM/Sirius merger, because Howard Stern made fun of Dolly Parton (40)
(ZDNet) Interesting Would Microsoft ever split itself up and pull a reverse Voltron? (14)
(Biz Journel) Asinine After running out of ways to screw the casual travel, Delta turns the screws on its own frequent flyers (19)
(ClusterStock) Dumbass Last Year: Invest in Asian economies, they're your safe harbor from the US markets. Today: Oops (19)
(Daily Mail) Amusing Last week's horror: OMG groceries are the most expensive EVAR. This week's horror: OMG groceries are selling at the highest discounts EVAR. Can $30/barrel oil be far behind? (25)
(Some Mint) Amusing To counterbalance the "Gold has dropped x% in y time" links that appear from time to time: Metals rise 5% in 2 days as word gets out that we're entering stagflation and the fed has left itself nowhere to go (54)
(Bloomberg) Obvious Oil smashes through $141 on news that investors love commodities. "Looking good, Billy Ray. Feeling good, Lewis." (59)
(AP) Obvious Yahoo rearranges deck chairs in face of stockholder revolt (12)

Thu June 26, 2008
(CNBC) Sad It's worth half of Avon, a quarter of Yahoo, an eighth of CVS, a ninth of McDonalds, and about the size of Mattel, who makes Hotter Wheels (57)
(AP) Interesting Important dates in Microsoft history. The day they stole everything from Xerox strangely absent (42)
(Yahoo) Asinine Home sales rise by 2% from April to May, but fall 16% from last May to this May. You pick the headline (42)
(Marketwatch) Obvious Dow at lowest levels since 2006. Commodities such as hookers and blow up 33% year to date (44)
(NJ.com) Obvious Wendy's is handing out free burgers in Jersey City tomorrow. The catch: the burgers are from Wendy's (66)
(BBC) Spiffy Justice Department levies $504 million in fines on five airlines for fixing air cargo rates. That's another twelve hours in Iraq paid for (23)
(Marketwatch) Scary Stocks fall more than 200 points on news that stocks have fallen over 3,000 points since October. DON'T look at your 401(k) (128)
(CNBC) Interesting The Fast Money Fartknockers contemplate if the aerospace cycle is winding down and the merits of Boeing (9)
(USA Today) Sad The real housing crisis: People with white-sounding names are ending up in homeless shelters (64)
(Chicago Sun-Times) Spiffy The horror, the horror: One-car family gets by just fine (186)
(BBC) Stupid London Underground cleaners set to strike for higher pay. In related news, people apparently clean the London Underground - not that you'd notice (44)
(MSNBC) Followup Budweiser tell the Belgians to take their waffles and stuff them up their arse. This Bud is not for you (30)
(Globe and Mail) Obvious The Fed is having an existential crisis after realizing that changing the key rate every other week doesn't seem to be doing anything (18)
(USA Today) Stupid Blah blah blah gas prices blah blah blah margins blah blah blah magic eight ball blah blah blah slim jims (12)
(Hartford Courant) Obvious Tribune Company takes another step in eliminating newspapers as a form of media (6)
(New York Daily News) Interesting Thousands of Con Edison workers says management is in the dark and are threatenig to walk off the job ea (38)
(Reno Gazette-Journal) Amusing Horses in agony as cowboys forced to rideshare due to high gas prices (19)
(Marketwatch) Scary Ford mulls sale of Volvo to either Russia or China. Soon your safe shiatbox will either crash and burn, or render you sterile from the lead content. Bikini Team not included (27)
(AP) Stupid Oil prices rise on news that ... wait for it ... U.S. stockpiles are larger than expected. No heads left to asplode (39)
(Forbes) Obvious Oracle reports strong 4Q profits, warns their CEO will embarass himself again in his quest for the America's Cup (2)
(Bloomberg) Obvious Citigroup will post another $8.9 billion in write-downs. Goldman cuts their six-month target to $16. Prince Alwaleed bin Talal buys another yacht to console himself (3)
(Bloomberg) Amusing Congratulations to Bank of America on your successful acquisition of Countrywide Financial. Your investment just bought you a seat at the defense table in the largest lawsuit in history. What's in your wallet? (11)

Wed June 25, 2008
(The Consumerist) Cool German airline Ryanair's CEO announces in press interview that transcontinental business class passengers will receive free "beds and bjs." With video of said announcement. Not safe for work for the word bj (25)
(AP) Asinine Register of the County Orange trys to source the out editing copy in its paper of news to India, please (82)
(The New York Times) Obvious Suddenly living in the distant suburbs -- where there is no mass transit, and you have to drive miles and miles just to get a gallon of milk -- doesn't seem as appealing as it used to (269)
(Forbes) Followup ♫ Its name is Rio, and it digs up lots of sand / It borrowed billions for its buyout of Alcan / And now to implement its debt reduction plan / Oh Rio's issued bonds, so buy them if you can ♫ (15)
(SeattlePI) Weird Starbucks may try to revive its failing business model by forging alliance with Cheesecake Factory. Flailing SBUX trifecta in play (10)
(CNBC) Obvious Walgreen's Q3 profit rises two percent due to cash-strapped Americans' increasing demand for prescription drugs to dull the pain (6)
(TTAC) Obvious Months after declaring GM stock to be a hot pick, Jim Cramer now claims they are heading for Chapter 11. At least he right about Bear Stearns... oh wait (28)
(CNN) Spiffy Airline tests in-flight web access: Won't filter content, eventually resulting in passengers seeing a grown man naked (94)
(Marketwatch) Followup When is doing nothing news? When it's the Federal Reserve Board (31)
(CNBC) Stupid Old and busted: Citigroup promises "A deal is a deal," no longer reserving the right to raise interest rates on cards at any time. New hotness: Revisiting that policy (21)
(AP) Interesting Charter drops Web tracking initiative; has no plans to stop sucking (14)
(Silicon Alley Insider) Interesting Starbucks gives up trying to sell expensive CDs, still trying to sell expensive coffee (17)
(Bloomberg) Dumbass Those analysts, who weeks ago were telling investors to buy bank stocks because the worst was over, are now flip-flopping (13)
(Fox Business) PSA Why the fed sits tight today (101)
(CNBC) Unlikely Ahead of the Fed's decision today, some stock pickers suggest trimming oil holdings (6)
(CNBC) Scary Warren Buffett says inflation in the U.S. is "exploding" and urges the Federal Reserve not to signal that controlling prices is secondary to economic growth (26)
(Wall Street Journal) Amusing A look at the diary of August A. Busch IV, the incompetent who will be the last CEO of Budweiser in his family (28)
(Metro) Obvious If you chose Barclays as the next bank to sell a big chunk of itself to foreign investors for pennies on the dollar in a desperate attempt at recapitalization, please come forward to claim your prize (5)
(Bloomberg) Weird Warren Buffett compares Berkshire Hathaway to an art museum, other business are pr0n shop operators. Also talks about making boobs larger on paintings (7)
(CNBC) PSA Oil drops below $137 on news of the Cubs losing their first home game in like almost a month (22)
(Kotaku) Amusing Rockstar's "hot coffee" class action lawsuit settled. For a million and change, it was the best advertising campaign ever (111)
(Some Guy) Asinine In an effort to keep your grocery prices down, supermarkets will stop labeling the items or their shelves with prices. Don't worry, though, you can find out the prices of your items when they are scanned at the check-out register (174)
(Marketwatch) Obvious It's official: Four years of home-price gains wiped out in twelve short months. More losses to follow. Love and kisses, Case-Shiller home price index (41)
(USA Today) Interesting Nearly two million stimulus checks have been intercepted for unpaid debts from child support, student loans and other reasons your life sucks (37)
(MSNBC) Stupid Airlines collapsing? Not according to this guy, who says it's a renaissance, a return to the '50s and '60s when only rich white people flew (31)

Tue June 24, 2008
(The Business Sheet) Interesting Lehman Brothers CEO: I've done a terrible job this year so I won't pay myself $40 million (33)
(informationweek) Interesting Microsoft pledges Windows XP support through 2014. Suck it, Vista (210)
(C|Net) Amusing Tech CEOs line up to kiss Bill Gates' ass (11)
(The New York Times) Obvious Newspapers are facing their worse year ever for advertising revenue, at least until next year (35)
(nokia.com) Interesting Nokia to acquire Symbian. New vibration mode expected to be strongest yet (27)
(News.com.au) Obvious OPEC president declares that oil prices will not be coming down with the most eloquent and heart wrenching commentary you are ever likely to read (233)
(CNBC) Obvious UPS is warning that Q2 profit will be slashed due to higher fuel costs, slowing economy (11)
(BBC) Obvious Oil prices rise on news of George Carlin's death (12)
(The Business Sheet) Interesting JC Penney mortified to find teen sex ad on YouTube: "Today's the day to... get away with it." Ad agency denies involvement (14)
(CNN) PSA GM announces 72 hour six-year no interest "We're Hemorrhaging Cash" sale. Still trying to figure out that whole "profit" thing (74)
(Komo) Misc Hardware store marks rope section with noose for seven years. NAACP gets all hung up about it (38)
(The Local (Germany)) Stupid Google 0, German domain grabber 1 (16)
(CNN) PSA 8 worst things to say in a job interview. "Suck it, dickface" surprisingly absent (84)
(PCWorld) Obvious Veoh.com to distribute popular shows that people want to watch. It's part of a bold new business strategy called "Not going bankrupt" (5)
(MSNBC) Sad Hardee's founder outlives most Hardee's customers (74)
(News.com.au) Obvious Oil company's solution to the rising fuel price crisis: Um, just don't drive so much (291)
(Wired) Asinine As the recording industry gets more and more petty when it comes to stealing of music, they have declared AM and FM radio to be piracy (109)

Mon June 23, 2008
(BBC) Obvious Economics 101: Corporations don't like to pay taxes (35)
(Reuters) Obvious Confidence study shows employees would rather have "Nap Pods" and time to work on side projects, then having wages cuts or work in a war zone (14)
(CNN) Sad Nissan out-uglies the competition (53)
(Some Guy) Dumbass Gasoline is overpriced, according to the experts at the No Farking Shiat Sherlock institute. Obvious tag couldn't scrounge gas money, sent Dumbass on his bike instead (122)
(Spiegel) Asinine Five-star luxury hotels are dropping a star in the hope of gaining new business. Wait, what? (5)
(Bloomberg) Amusing Unintentionally, Deutche Bank gets involved in the Las Vegas casino business. You know who else liked to gamble, and lost? (5)
(Reuters) Interesting Circuit City stock down by 18 percent on news of possible takeover and inevitable customer revolt against company's total crappiness (36)
(CNN) Asinine Why aren't the oil companies drilling in places in the US were there is oil? Dirty hippies? Nope. Some rare animal? Nope. That the oil companies already have has permission to drill and leasing rights but choose not to? Ding ding ding (481)
(Yahoo) Spiffy NFL Network in merger talks with ESPN to broaden audience from 23 households to 100 million (60)
(Silicon Alley Insider) Followup Under $1 billion lawsuit threat, YouTube's anti-piracy system takes weekend off (28)
(The Business Sheet) Interesting Would-be Anheuser-Busch owners itching to slash funding for Budweiser Clydesdales. Dalmatian mascot toast, too (28)
(AP) Obvious Citigroup announce massive cuts in their investment banking division after bankers play Monopoly™ with "Other People's Money" (43)

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