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Sun September 06, 2009
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Bay Bridge reopening may be delayed a while. Nothing major, it's just that the piece that holds up half the bridge has a huge crack that can be seen from 120 feet away
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(97)
 
(Suburban Chicago News)
 
 
 
"He was always quiet and we never had a problem with him," said a neighbor, but the anti-tank rocket launcher "was a little over the top"
source: suburbanchicagonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
French school teachers urged to take note of which female students are absent. You know, in case their parents shipped them abroad into forced marriages
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(The Tennessean)
 
 
 
Mayor nevah forgits 9/11, forwards e-mail attacking Obama over USPS Muslim stamp...that debuted in 2001
source: tennessean.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(99)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this double play dilemma
source: media.journalinteractive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Remember to put your Glock-24 on the BOTTOM of your backpack, or it'll smash your pudding cup
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(269)
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
20 of the dumbest questions Banff tourism workers hear from visitors, including 'Can you turn the fog off so I can see?' and 'Where are the igloos and the Eskimos?'
source: canada.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(223)
 
(Austrian Times)
 
 
 
Piece of IKEA store roofing falls on shopper. Did someone not tighten the little allen screw with the included wrench when they built the place?
source: austriantimes.at   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(SacBee)
 
 
 
While the state of California languishes in financial distress, it's good to know that state archaeologists are still performing historically meaningful work, like excavating a 1960's hippie commune. w/pics and vid
source: sacbee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(179)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
British towns go to war over who actually invented black pudding, which for you Americans, is a sausage casing stuffed with congealed pig blood, oatmeal and lard
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(237)
 
(Buffalo News)
 
 
 
Well-connected city businessman arrested for having stolen handicapped permits? Go directly to the Mayor's Office, do not pass go, do not collect an arrest record
source: buffalonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(Boston Herald)
 
 
 
Great White terrorizes New England for second time this decade
source: bostonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(115)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Photoshop this atomic force microscope
source: i.dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
What do you do when your employer cancels your health insurance retroactively effective 11 months ago?
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(379)
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Roofer puts his skill laying shingles to an artistic use by making mosaics. Fark: out of produce stickers
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Gas station and convenience store owners rave about nitrous oxide canister sales that seem to peak every Friday and Saturday night
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(117)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Sister with bad habit arrested for DUI
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Feet are washing ashore at Cockey Creek in Maryland. And you don't want to know what's washing up at Footy Beach
source: wtopnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(75)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Color him gone
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(1445)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this old geezer ballplayer
source: peninsuladailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(Quad City Times)
 
 
 
Not news: couple renews their vows. News: he's got heart problems, she has breast cancer. Fark: they're part of a clown troupe. Ultrafark: their wedding ceremony took place in a church made to look like a circus
source: qctimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
By any standards-cultural, horticultural, political, cinematic, jurisprudential, meteorological-this is the least eventful summer since 1491
source: online.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(oddee)
 
 
 
Strangest tramp stamps. Mostly safe for work, but one or two of them are dicey
source: oddee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(340)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Naked cowboy drops bid to become NYC mayor citing red tape, blue balls
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
An underwater robot has been missing since Monday, we're picking up underwater earthquakes in the Reykjanes Ridge, and a rocket bus has been denied permission for an emergency landing at Clavius
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 


Sat September 05, 2009
(Pasco County Sheriff)
 
 
 
Introducing the latest candidate for the mugshot HOF, courtesy of our favorite state
source: pascosheriff.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(97)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Banksy mural spoofing the royal family ruined by British bureaucratic incompetence
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(111)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Photoshop Theme: Bad tattoo ideas
source: images.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(112)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Pretty impressive pictorial display of a live-fire exercise by the Japan Ground Self-Defense Force, featuring a few shots of Japanese women in uniform, lots of explosions, and at least three tubas
source: mdn.mainichi.jp   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(109)
 
(WCBStv.com)
 
 
 
Kind of news: Car crashes into house. Fark: The second floor of the house
source: wcbstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(The News & Observer (NC))
 
 
 
Ag colleges do not mess around when it comes to school rivalry. With pic
source: newsobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
When TV and video games aren't enough to zone out and quiet your six-year old, a few bong hits will do nicely
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Good news: Your pilot remembers to put the wheels down for the landing. Fark: It's a water landing
source: forestlaketimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Reporter to kitty: Nice kitty. Kitty to reporter: NOM NOM NOM. With lunchtime video
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Over the river, through the woods, and into the secret 5' x 12' room at grandmother's house for two years we go
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(Waterloo Courier)
 
 
 
Two Iowa teens killed in go-kart accident. Witnesses claim the duo was hit by a spiky blue shell
source: wcfcourier.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(The Toy Zone)
 
 
 
10 amazing photographs that are actually paintings
source: thetoyzone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(133)
 
(My Fox Dallas)
 
 
 
Dispatcher: "911, what's your emergency?" Caller: "My house is on fire" Dispatcher: "I know, that's what you get for breaking up with me"
source: myfoxdfw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(97)
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
Arctic researcher has to be evacuated when wolves discover she has bacon
source: canada.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(87)
 
(Mainichi Daily News)
 
 
 
Yakuza now requiring gang members to take a written exam as a preventative measure against lawsuits. Presumably, failure means amputation of the last joint of the little finger
source: mdn.mainichi.jp   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
California offers $100,000 I.O.U to anyone with information leading to the arrest and conviction of wildfire arsonist
source: latimesblogs.latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Theme: Cereal box promotions that, in hindsight, were not such great ideas after all
source: images.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
A: Bread, chicken skin, Saran Wrap, potato chips, Coca Cola, kebabs. Q: What are things that you shouldn't use as contraceptives?
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 
(Some Gal)
 
 
 
"You're not using the GPS because you don't appreciate the tone of the robot?"
source: thebloggess.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(145)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Girl Guides celebrate 100th anniversary today, an achievement that would not have been possible if they hadn't started lacing boxes of Thin Mints with cocaine or whatever it is that makes it impossible to stop eating the damn things
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Roadside fruit vendor was the inspiration for minister's "drive-thru prayer stand"
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Some kids get a fake ID to buy beer. Others steal the identity of a 71-year-old to get in-state tuition
source: wsbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(Kitsap Sun)
 
 
 
Witnesses said the drunk naked man and the drunk man with no pants were on top of and intertwined with the third man, when one of them yelled "RETURN OF THE JEDI"
source: kitsapsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(77)
 
(Foobies)
 
 
 
Bank refuses to replace €500 note man claims was eaten by his cat
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
British gardeners forbidden from using barbed wire in their back yards in case vandals hurt themselves on it while trespassing
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(153)
 
(Lancashire Evening Post)
 
 
 
Pub owner gives police details of terrifying, yet somehow comical robbery by gorilla and clown
source: lep.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(15)
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Meet 100 year old Nicholas Winton. 70 years ago he rescued hundreds of Jewish kids from Nazi-occupied Czechoslovakia. Something in my eye
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
The glass front design of Apple Stores lures in buyers. It also makes it possible for thieves to steal 23 Macbooks and 14 iPhones in about 30 seconds
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(156)
 
(Daily Telegraph)
 
 
 
Headline you probably never thought you'd see: "Hitler sex tape ad starts TV war" (pic in link slightly Not safe for work, with Not safe for work video linked in article)
source: dailytelegraph.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Today is International Bacon Day
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(143)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Illegal immigrant wins lottery jackpot in Sweden, thanks country for being unable to deport him or tens of thousands of others which allowed him to win the jackpot
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(Voxy)
 
 
 
Unfortunate headline typo: "Church Kids Raid Panty's For Foodbank Supplies"
source: voxy.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Miracle cat Brownie survives being shot in the head with an arrow just in time for a wild and crazy Caturday (with pic - kitty is safe but view with caution)
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(548)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this fish head
source: s.wsj.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Prep school gets rid of its library of 20,000 books and replaces it with 3 flatscreen tvs, 18 Kindles and a $12,000 cappucino machine
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(182)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Music teacher supplies pistol to terminally ill father in hospital so he doesn't have to wait for death panel
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(171)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Begun, the Wiener Wars have
source: katu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Apparently the world's largest bottle of whisky is in this photo, too
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(91)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Lobster fishermen get all crabby
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(The News & Observer (NC))
 
 
 
Ignore the Ugly Monkey, kids
source: newsobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(21)
 
(Globe and Mail)
 
 
 
Ice cream factory burns down, firefighters expect to finally extinguish flames by sundae
source: theglobeandmail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
If you're going to steal change from a car it may be wise to avoid the vehicles parked at the police station
source: ydr.inyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(10)
 
(Some sadist)
 
 
 
I see your ping pong ball in anus and raise you an ass beating with a cheese grater
source: theprovince.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Hair we go again. The 80s hair styles are coming back in fashion. One word as to why this is a bad idea: mullets
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(167)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Nanny State garbagemen refuse to pick up recycling box because it contains a single maggot and thus is considered 'livestock'
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
Philadelphia's naked bike ride held this Sunday at dusk, finally uniting testicle with crepuscle
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(10tv)
 
 
 
Robber flees bank with pillowcase full of money. Police are left wondering how he sleeps at night
source: 10tv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(17)
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
Four months after risking his life to save a drowning teenager, a Winnipeg homeless man does it again. Why is the hero tag based on an American flag again?
source: vancouversun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(144)
 


Fri September 04, 2009
(Google)
 
 
 
New Marvel superhero, Loaded Gunn. Fighting crimes against fashion. First target: Crocs
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(96)
 
(Some Pedo)
 
 
 
Headline fail
source: unionleader.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Washington State park closed due to Cougar sighting. Officials plan to put up end-zone goalposts to get rid of it
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(The New Yorker)
 
 
 
News: Texas executes an innocent man. Fark: Again
source: newyorker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(247)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
In Japan, sushi is about a small amount of fish eaten seasonally. In America, it's about California rolls the size of a child's arm. That's why there will soon be no more fish in the oceans
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(152)
 
(BusinessWeek)
 
 
 
Symantec decides to go on the offensive against hackers. Good luck, they're behind seven boxxys
source: businessweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(143)
 
(Some Tagger)
 
 
 
"Woman Thinks She Had Web Date Rape" - Let's hope she didn't get teen pregnant
source: thepittsburghchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Photoshop what the Disney - Marvel merger will look like
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(87)
 
(Daily Dispatch)
 
 
 
Cops arrest monkey for refusing to identify itself
source: dispatch.co.za   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this smoking sunflower
source: s.wsj.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
This week's mugshot roundup: Nuts
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(206)
 
(Globe and Mail)
 
 
 
Why corn dogs are nature's perfect food
source: theglobeandmail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(106)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Sweden declares open season on raccoon dogs, whatever the hell THEY are
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(Slashdot)
 
 
 
"Unschooling" 'assumes that an outing at the park - or even hours spent playing a video game - can be just as valuable a teaching resource as Hooked on Phonics.'
source: news.slashdot.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(101)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Kirk and Spock show up together at Dragon-Con to tell everyone to get a long life and prosper
source: marquee.blogs.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(253)
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
Baltimore police department is so stretched for money they can't afford batteries for their radios. So naturally they buy everyone a new Blackberry
source: baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(GQ)
 
 
 
America's 25 douchiest colleges. "Duke is probably number one. But we'd rather not rank Duke number one at anything."
source: men.style.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(349)
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
Chicago newspaper columnist is going to recreate Ferris Bueller's Day Off, including the Cubs game, the Art Institute and the parade, all in real time, next weekend
source: chicagonow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(Some Superhero)
 
 
 
Superhero Smackdown: Hulk vs Hellboy, who would win?
source: thecorrectness.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(289)
 
(BDCwire)
 
 
 
Can I get a ride mom? Yes Honey. Ok, just keep the engine running, leave the window open and when i jump in hit the gas and GOOOO
source: wbbm780.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(16)
 
(Denver Daily News)
 
 
 
Dog gets $2,500 surgery after eating same sock twice: "I think lab owners know how stupid these animals can be."
source: thedenverdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(198)
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
Okay, Canadian teenagers? Putting ping pong balls in your unconscious friend's anus is over the line. In case you weren't sure
source: canada.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(142)
 
(Gazette Live)
 
 
 
Man discovers getting stabbed with vacuum cleaner sucks
source: gazettelive.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 
(The Tennessean)
 
 
 
Man accused of swindling millions from victims' retirement funds spends his free time in jail making voodoo dolls of people testifying against him
source: tennessean.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 
(Some flame)
 
 
 
I love I love I love I love my nekked old fat calandar guy
source: thenewstribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Face it, America, you're an addict: Your hooked on our oil, and you'll never leave us, says Saudi prince
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(301)
 
(the alligator)
 
 
 
School bus turned "Pool" bus may be drained by mean ol' city codes department. With cheesy "Don't drain me, bro" picture
source: alligator.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(Columbus Dispatch)
 
 
 
Accidentally shooting yourself in the foot with a bullet is one thing, accidentally shooting your neighbor's house with a cannonball is another
source: dispatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"We want to document the kind of stuff that when you see it, you immediately have to call someone and be like, 'Dude, I'm at Wal-Mart and I just saw a goat'" (pics)
source: mailonsunday.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(208)
 
(Breitbart.com)
 
 
 
100 year old skeleton with rifle found under garden shed. Armed Hide-and-Seek tournaments expected to begin on Fox this fall
source: breitbart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(93)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Chicago schools to spend $30 million on 1200 students 'at risk of comitting violence' or being a victimized. Though the students can't do the math, thats $25k per kid
source: wbbm780.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(96)
 
(some masshole)
 
 
 
Woman slams into tractor trailer while driving and eating. She sounds flat
source: eagletribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(104)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Skinny thighs could spell your doom. Of course, so could fat thighs. Or, apparently, any thighs at all. Your body image surrenders
source: bodyodd.msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(173)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
TSG Friday photo fun Laor Day special: Match the perp with their occupation
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this stage setting
source: s.wsj.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
The sleaziest, scummiest tourist destinations to avoid in Europe. Besides the Netherlands, but that's kind of a given
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(137)
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
Ferris Büeller's year off
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
"We thought it was true so we printed it without checking. We didn't know the Onion was not a real news site"
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(105)
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
For the last goddamn time: "I'm hungry" is not a reason to call 911
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(82)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Coke plant explodes. Police seek man leaving the scene with empty case of Mentos
source: thepittsburghchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"Whatever happened to Gary Cooper? Whatever happened, in other words, to quiet, unemotive Americans who went about their business without fanfare, without swagger, but with firmness and no lack of controlled anger at the right time?"
source: middle-east-online.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(395)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Vermont teen gets off easy in sexting case
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(111)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
If you had France in the "whose will be the next education ministry to issue a hilariously misspelled press release" sweepstakes then you can step forward and claim your prize now
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
French lose their minds as schools ban traditional kisses on cheeks over swine flu: "If kissing is dangerous, are we to ban making love, or ask people to do it several metres apart?"
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(98)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Reminder: Dragon*Con Fark Party this Saturday, 3pm, Hilton Lobby Bar. LGT original party thread
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Jesus Christ spotted on Mars. See, we told you he was an extraterrestrial
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(116)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Police: "We have today destroyed cannabis plants worth an estimated $6.3m". University: "Actually, that was our legal experiment into the use of hemp fibres, and you're going to have to pay for it"
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(194)
 
(ABC 15)
 
 
 
Clever: You bring a baseball bat when invading someone's home. Not so clever: You choose the home of someone who has a sword
source: abc15.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(127)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
In retrospect, NATO forces aren't so sure that calling in airstrikes was the smartest way to stop two hijacked fuel tankers
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(178)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Montana girl admits trying to poison dad's Jell-O. On the next episode of "The Cosby Mysteries"
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(WCBStv.com)
 
 
 
Say shalom to my little friend
source: wcbstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(95)
 
(National Review)
 
 
 
National Review asks the question no one is dumb enough to ask: "Was World War II worth it?"
source: article.nationalreview.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(351)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
International nudist club getting together for 5-legged sack races
source: cairns.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(Hope Star)
 
 
 
"Truck killed in fiery crash." Driver didn't make it, either
source: hopestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
High school football player makes tackle of his life
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(201)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
"A spokesman for the project said both the chicken the man were unhurt."
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(16)
 
(The Age (Melbourne))
 
 
 
If you see an ugly-ass echidna go down a drain let it go because, man, it's gone. Unless you want a handful of spines and dislocated shoulder
source: theage.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this attention getter
source: s.wsj.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Not news: Kid steals pencils. Still not news: From an art gallery. Farking hell: Pencils are valued at £500,000
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(Lancashire Evening Post)
 
 
 
33-stone Viking enthusiast goes on a diet to stop his longboat from capsizing
source: lep.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(Austin 360)
 
 
 
Austin, TX garbage trucks become stars of alternative dance theater production
source: austin360.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Women found to cheat more than men, and get away with it more often because they're better at lying about it
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(641)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Vaccine for Swine Flu, also known as the overblown flu, can cause neurological damage. Of course if you are worried about the swine flu you a moran so no one will notice
source: jonesreport.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(171)
 
(National Post)
 
 
 
"Keep religion out of public schools." "HELP WE'RE BEING OPPRESSED" "Ok, then let's teach kids about every religion instead of just yours." "HELP WE'RE BEING OPPRESSED"
source: nationalpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(596)
 


Thu September 03, 2009
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
New rules bans teachers from getting drunk at bars on weekends. But it says nothing about getting drunk in the classroom on weekdays
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(116)
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this window washing woman
source: flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"Deputies: Woman Beats Mother With Candlestick." Was it in the library or the conservatory? No clue
source: wyff4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(75)
 
(IndyStar)
 
 
 
For two weeks all of the electronic garage doors and keyless car door openers mysteriously stopped working for one neighborhood
source: indystar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(131)
 
(Post-Gazette)
 
 
 
Woman charged with raping burning man. Wow, that's a lot of hippies
source: post-gazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(92)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
New hybrid school bus will soon be waiting silently for your little snowflake
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(175)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Arkansas Fire Chief complains about receiving speeding tickets, so Cops shoot him...in Court...in the back
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(299)
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Rival to great Springfield tire fire ongoing near Burns. Excellent
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
RAF fighter pilot drinks tea while doing 14 aerial loops because he's a fighter pilot and he's just that awesome (pic)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Chicago mayor looks through list of properties suspected of harboring gang and drug activity, finds one owned by his press secretary. The only thing surprising about this story is that is made it to a newspaper
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Some clowns steal statue from Ronald McDonald House
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Jacksonville.com)
 
 
 
Mom to teen, "maybe you should get off the couch cause you're wet". Teen to mom, "maybe you should shut up cause you're bleeding"
source: jacksonville.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(99)
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Unintended consequence of Obama's Cash For Clunkers program - demolition derby drivers can't find cars to wreck
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(133)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Ali Bongo drums up enough support to snare election victory, thanks his electoral bass for helping him ride to this cymbalic win
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(WCBStv.com)
 
 
 
Grinch cancels December holiday tree lighting ceremony in Lincoln Center-ville according to spokesperson E. Scrooge
source: wcbstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Head of Greyhound cuts service to Manitoba, axes routes in Northern Ontario. Passengers who bought tickets a head of time need not be unnerved
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
New police anti-speeding ad tells late drivers to lie to their bosses. "If you're late for work, don't speed. Keep an arm cast in the car in case you need to fake a hospital visit. "
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man's life dream is to set himself on fire and burn for two minutes and 39 seconds
source: vancouversun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Satan speaks out against a Michigan church
source: myfoxdetroit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(187)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Woman says having her 30-foot long fingernails broken off in car accident "robbed her of her identity" (w/ pic that will haunt your dreams)
source: belfasttelegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(183)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
70 years ago today, World War II began. Unless, of course, you're American - in which case you might want to green light this in two year's time (once you've decided who's likely to win)
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(692)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
If you're friends with a guy who beat a woman to death with a hammer, don't be surprised when he cuts you up and eats your brain
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(101)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Hospital food improving from institutional crap to gourmet, full-service cuisine. Subby hoping same happens with nurses
source: online.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Pre-school teachers sickened by brownies... figured something was wrong when their coordination went to pot
source: latimesblogs.latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Well sir, the Breathalyzer says you're not intoxicated, but just to be sure let me see your penis for a minute
source: newsnet5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(133)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this move
source: web.mit.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Some Fat Guy)
 
 
 
One thing English cuisine gets right -- breakfast. And now it comes in a handy goblet made of bacon
source: thisiswhyyourefat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
New Jersey launches NJ Alert, an email and text message emergency notification system; immediately begins continuous broadcasts of "GET OUT OF NEW JERSEY"
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Have you ever got into your car, started driving and wondered what would happen if you just kept going?
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(169)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Pandemic bill would allow health officials to enter homes without warrants. Health officials with body armor, clubs and riot gear, according to this article
source: wnd.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(161)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Hey Foodies: The LA Times thinks you're a bunch of self-righteous douchebags. LONG LIVE POT PIE
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(214)
 
(WYFF4)
 
 
 
Good news: The state bureau of investigation is going to get you off the hook. Bad news: You're going to Hell. Good news: You're in Georgia, so probably won't be able to tell the difference
source: wyff4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(139)
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
100 Year Old color pictures of Russia developed using digital methods
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(138)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
70-year-old British man has stroke. That's bad. The stroke restores his vision. That's good. He also loses the ability to speak French. That's bad
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(CBS13.com - CBS Sacramento)
 
 
 
Woman blows a .31 on the Breathalyzer. Also, up her car
source: cbs13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
So you are transporting $1.6 million worth of heroin in your car at 4:30am in Philly and don't want to get caught. Do you: C) blow through stop signs?
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Plumber bemoans exposed crack
source: postindependent.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Naples News)
 
 
 
Affairs, receptionist crushes, taking prostitutes and women on your yacht, fellating teenage boys - oh, dentistry is such an exciting field
source: naplesnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
A nutritious meal can come from a bag, I suppose. Probably not a colostomy bag, though
source: fox19.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Police in NJ can now charge you with DUI and careless driving even if you're not in a car, or not even moving
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(324)
 
(WCBStv.com)
 
 
 
Taxi cab explodes in Times Square. Rudy Giuliani shows up seconds later to put the blaze out, launch New York gubernatorial campaign. (With nifty photo and video of said explosion)
source: wcbstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(82)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
One thing we can all be quite clear on, your dog doesn't want to be left behind at the scene of a burglary
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(14)
 
(New Scientist)
 
 
 
13 things that don't make sense. 'Women' surprisingly absent
source: newscientist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(713)
 
(MaineToday.com)
 
 
 
It's bad enough when you offer to sell authentic "Maine Indian scalps" on Craigslist. But to offer them to white people only will almost always get the FBI involved
source: morningsentinel.mainetoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Taking death panels one step further: scheduling the date for your husband's funeral while he is still alive
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(IndyStar)
 
 
 
Get ready for Christmas music in September
source: indystar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(118)
 
(KGMB)
 
 
 
National Park firefighters from Hawaii head to California to relax by fighting fires that don't involve hot lava
source: kgmb9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(Reno Gazette-Journal)
 
 
 
Today's career-limiting move is brought to you by a youth drug rehab counselor who stole his employer's van to go get meth, heroin and a hooker
source: rgj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Salvadorean President shocked -- SHOCKED -- that guy who filmed documentary about Salvadoran street gangs has been killed
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
For some strange reason, people don't seem to want to shell out $19.99 to read about Bernie Madoff's sex life
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
It seems that most students feel "The Cuddler' is an inappropriate moniker for the sexual assault suspect who breaks into college dorm rooms, gets into bed with women and molests them
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(116)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Eliot Spitzer continues his neverending quest to help girls work their way through school
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Scottish men buy bigger condoms than the rest of the UK, but to be fair, you can't make a decent haggis in the smaller sizes
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(Somerville Journal)
 
 
 
You have to be pretty drunk to tell the cops that you won't get out of the park because the park belongs to you
source: wickedlocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(MetroWest Daily News)
 
 
 
Man breaks into estranged wife's home in order to pay the bills. Dude, you're doing it wrong
source: metrowestdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(Somerville Journal)
 
 
 
Drunk, bloody, spitting man tries to persuade cops that he can't be arrested while naked
source: wickedlocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Photoshop this sandy soldier
source: inapcache.boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Fall goeth before a pride
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(WorldNetDaily)
 
 
 
Miss Universe contestants had to blow up condoms as part of the competition. Of course, someone is upset by this
source: wnd.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(151)
 
(Corpus Christi Caller-Times)
 
 
 
Having run out of money, two men fight for the affection of a topless dancer by bringing out their big guns
source: caller.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(77)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Why you should wait until you get home before taking Viagra
source: wtsp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(Some Chick)
 
 
 
Eight year old girl to school bus driver: "This isn't my stop." Driver: "That's tough. This is my last stop." Told you he was hardcore
source: kvia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(367)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
3,700-year-old wall built to separate warring tribes discovered in Jerusalem. This is a repeat from the dawn of history to right this minute
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(87)
 
(Some Pissed Off Guy)
 
 
 
Low-wage workers often ripped off by employers, according to Professor N. Shiat Sherlock
source: uspoverty.change.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(234)
 
(Lincoln Journal Star)
 
 
 
Who says there is nothing fun for kids to do in the Midwest?
source: journalstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(Examiner)
 
 
 
Atheists suing NASA for putting God in heaven or some damn thing
source: examiner.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(482)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Two tons of powdered sugar was stolen from a doughnut shop. Cops issue a "kill on sight" order
source: itemonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Florida experiences first net loss of population since 1940s due to being, well, Florida
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(BDCwire)
 
 
 
Theft of oxycontin has become so bad that one drugstore chain is putting it in some off their store's safes, where presumably, only their employees can steal it
source: wbbm780.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Terminally ill member of the Manson Family seeks parole. Or extradition to Scotland
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(119)
 
(Harper's)
 
 
 
Not news: Volunteer girls soccer coach e-mails team parents about expectations for the season. Still not news: with tongue planted firmly in cheek. Fark: Resigns after parents complain about snowflakes being in 'Green Death'
source: smartfootball.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(88)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this neutrino tank
source: hepwww.rl.ac.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(Brooklyn Paper)
 
 
 
The walrus is dead. This is not a repeat from 1980
source: brooklynpaper.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(97)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Not News: Man leads police on a high-speed chase through three towns at speeds in excess of 90 mph. Fark: In a Chevy Cavalier
source: wcsh6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(93)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
A controlled burn that might have prevented the current LA wildfire was blocked by environmentalists worried about air quality
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(214)
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 226: "Colour Popping" Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(211)
 


Wed September 02, 2009
(Techcrunch)
 
 
 
Alcohol and coarse salt are; A: building blocks to a margarita B: great for cleaning a dirty bong C: a topical treatment to get rid of AIDS-causing Jews
source: techcrunch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(158)
 
(Kansas City)
 
 
 
Thanks to a 61-year-old weirdo, crying toddler learned just what the five fingers said to the face
source: blogs.kansascity.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(673)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Black person photographed sneaking up on an unaware president inside the Oval Office by slithering on the floor. This headline would have been much scarier ten months ago
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(193)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Massachusetts might rename Boston's Logan airport after Kennedy. Next, might rename baseball team the Yankees
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(98)
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Heard about the rapper who forced her label to pay for her Cornell Ph.D.? It never happened
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(166)
 
(New Scientist)
 
 
 
Female gorillas trick the males into mating with them which makes evolution seem even more realistic
source: newscientist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(72)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Medic ignores shrapnel in her own arm to save SEVEN of her fellow soldiers. Oh, and she's smokin' hot too
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(292)
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
Coming soon to Lifetime, the heartwarming story of one man and his quest to lactate
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(100)
 
(Seacoastonline.com)
 
 
 
Fire tears through two flea market trailers doing dollars in damage
source: seacoastonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(Corpus Christi Caller-Times)
 
 
 
Couple charged with felony assault for stabbing, tazing another couple over hair straightener. Obviously someone was having a bad hair day
source: caller.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Sesame Street helps families communicate during tough times. Our house will be foreclosed in 1... 2... 3 months. Hahaha
source: ket.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(thefrisky)
 
 
 
When it comes to sex, women talk too much and men talk too little. Actually, make that "when it comes to anything"
source: thefrisky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(171)
 
(Some Guys)
 
 
 
Photoshop this consuming competition
source: s.wsj.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(Some Bird)
 
 
 
Madison, WI picks the pink plastic flamingo to be official city bird
source: channel3000.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
That mouse that was found in a Diet Pepsi can a couple months ago? Not true. Turns out it was a frog instead
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(Arutz Sheva)
 
 
 
Ahmadinejad's Imam: "Islam allows rape to get confessions. If you rape a young man it's ok to invite others to watch, do it as often as you want. Raping a virgin who will be executed brings great rewards." The Aristocrats
source: israelnationalnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(1223)
 
(Philly Burbs)
 
 
 
Good: Someone gives you a gift. Bad: They stole it from someone's basement. Fark: It's a water heater
source: phillyburbs.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(78)
 
(BDCwire)
 
 
 
Sleeping on the job will get you fired, particularly if you are at a fire
source: wbbm780.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
Surprise: the International Olympic Committee sees problems with Chicago's 2016 Olympic Bid. No word if the IOC is worried that the proximity to Wrigley Field will forever taint the Olympics
source: chicagobreakingnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(211)
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
Chinese democracy dissident sentenced to jail for about as long as it took Axl Rose to finish Chinese Democracy
source: canada.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(78)
 
(Scotsman)
 
 
 
Scottish clans Campbell and MacIntyre may have ended historic centuries-old feud via offering of snowballs. "Reparation has been made"
source: news.scotsman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(133)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Scientists say we are all mutants. So where the hell are my optic blasts?
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(213)
 
(MTV)
 
 
 
We all have goals and aspirations, but would you actually commit to it on camera the way these people did? (Sponsored link)
source: hpdeclare.mtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(78)
 
(Cleveland Plain Dealer)
 
 
 
Ex-Ohio Congressman, Jim Traficant, to be reunited with his pet muskrat later today
source: cleveland.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(Kansas City)
 
 
 
If you tell your date you're a cop and you're really not, don't make things worse by threatening to arrest her if she doesn't come home with you
source: kansascity.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(WATE-TV)
 
 
 
Apparently this bears repeating: It doesn't matter if the perp's handcuffed or not, you should still take your keys out of the police cruiser when you leave it
source: wate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(Bucks County Courier Times)
 
 
 
Teacher would've gotten away with the whole booze, pot and sex thing, if only his student hadn't seen pictures of other girls on his computer. 17-year-olds are so petty when they're jealous
source: phillyburbs.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(167)
 
(Scotsman)
 
 
 
If you smashed your way into a shop and stole booze and cigarettes... and are about 11 years old, the Scottish police would like to have a word with you
source: edinburghnews.scotsman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Teenage boy cries tears of blood, immediately out-goths entire world
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(156)
 
(Reading Evening Post)
 
 
 
Naked neighbour "put me off men", says victim. Picture of victim "put me off women", says subby
source: getreading.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(275)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Man told he otter find a different lake to swim in
source: calgarysun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Chinese man trains his dogs to do his shopping for him, now lives on a diet of mostly steak
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
We're secretly replacing one of these taxi drivers with a paranoid schizophrenic wife-murderer. Let's see if anyone notices
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(Corpus Christi Caller-Times)
 
 
 
Texas, in a constant battle for the title of fattest state in the nation and its own Fark tag, has lowered its P.E. standards for public schools
source: caller.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(216)
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
"Other rallies have had threats from time to time, but I don't think they've ever had the threat of a frozen koala being thrown on a road before"
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(Some too-old Guy)
 
 
 
Cleveland Fark Party October 17th at the Screaming Rooster In Lakewood
source: thescreamingrooster.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Fisherman calls police after he snags skeletel remains of an arm, inadvertently writes the first five minutes of the script to a "Bones" episode
source: suburbanchicagonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(105)
 
(Hotelier)
 
 
 
If you left your dentures, motorcycle, cat, sheep, Spiderman costume and/or handcuffed lover at a hotel in Australia, don't worry, the cleaning staff found them
source: hoteliermiddleeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
If you've ever wanted to get lost inside a giant cow stomach, today is the luckiest day you'll have until they start you on that new medication
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(21)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Wife of Japan's next prime minister rode a UFO to Venus
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(99)
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
Stow those hybrids and stock up on the Hummers. "Giant" oil field discovered in Gulf of Mexico
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(311)
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
If you see a bicyclist riding your son's stolen bike, don't run him over. Because you'll be pretty embarrassed if you're wrong about the bike
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(99)
 
(IndyStar)
 
 
 
"Clear the autopsy room for the next three days, and get me six cases of Cyanoacrylate, stat"
source: indystar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(87)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
There are still unanswered questions about the night of Princess Diana's death, according to a new book by her former lawyer. Presumably these include "how can I make some more money from this?" and the like
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(Some Improvised Uranian)
 
 
 
Al-Qaeda unveils a new weapon: the Improvised Rectal Explosive Device. Taco Bell immediately sues for patent infringement
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(101)
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
Photoshop this touching trunk
source: spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(Toronto Sun)
 
 
 
If you were thinking about going to Sochi's Discovery world this week, we have good news and bad news. Bad: a few less tropical fish than expected. Good: greater variety at the sushi bar
source: torontosun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(13)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
"Never in the history of this country has there been a generation that's cast a longer shadow without really having done anything to earn it than the children of the 60s"
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(399)
 
(OM NOM NOM NOM)
 
 
 
State Fair season is fast approaching, so it's time to wipe down the Grease-o-Meter, and introduce this year's winner: DEEP FRIED BUTTER
source: wfaa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(113)
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Hey, remember that time we got really wasted, pooled our cash to hire a fat escort, who then ripped us off and ran one of us over? That was awesome
source: seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Guy robs bank and has teller call the police so that he'll be arrested and sent to prison. To get away from his wife
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
UK lotto winner spent millions on drugs, designer clothes and breast implants. The rest she just squandered
source: buzz.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(133)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
If you deliver a newspaper to the wrong house, just let it go man. Otherwise you may end up impaled on a wrought-iron fence for two hours
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(17)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Teenagers who filmed themselves in sex acts and sent them around the school try a new excuse: The were worried that the Large Hardon Collider would kill them all
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(154)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Magnitude 7 earthquake hits Java as God decides he likes his coffee shaken, not stirred
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(Mental Floss)
 
 
 
Everyone knows about In-N-Out's not-secret secret menu. Here's a list of other secret menu items
source: mentalfloss.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(239)
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
This otherwise dull story of a mudslide livened up by: "The mudslide crushed Mrs Bell's pot plants . . ."
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(15)
 
(Some Chick)
 
 
 
After holding a knife to clerks' throats during a convenience store robbery, man is shot leaving with cash and cigarettes. He is now suing the store in excess of $125,000 for pain and suffering and emotional distress
source: wcpo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(159)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
7-11 finally pulls that 21 year old wiener off the roller
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(BDCwire)
 
 
 
Yessir, the belt with the hidden knife, handcuff key and buckle that can be used as a weapon, is indeed the wrong belt to wear to a courthouse
source: wbbm780.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
The Vatican issues a prayer for Catholics to say before sex. Apparently shouting, "Oh God" at the end of sex isn't enough
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(122)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Photoshop this Woodstock hippie and his flamboyant attire
source: images.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
No flying cars, but science has now given us something almost as good: A biscuit that won't immediately dissolve when dunked in coffee
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(82)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
An officer was in the neighborhood responding to a complaint about a dog. When he parked his car, a pit bull dog deflated all 4 tires of the deputy's cruiser. This had to be a set-up
source: jacksonsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(113)
 
(La Crosse Tribune)
 
 
 
If you are going to alter your prescription slip at least choose a drug that actually exists
source: lacrossetribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(102)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Too soon, man. Too soon
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(354)
 


Tue September 01, 2009
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
Parents and school address problem of youth drinking by having full bar at best prom EVER
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 
(Lohud.com)
 
 
 
New York state to ban Hudson River shad fishing; in other news, people still eat what's been swimming in the Hudson
source: lohud.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
City sends inmate work crew over to local liberal talk radio station to trim overgrown weeds, transmission lines
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
The AFL-CIO, the largest Union in the U.S., has declared that they will not support healthcare reform that does not include a public option
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(254)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Hmmmm Ford, Toyota and Honda do not get bailouts and sales are up, GM and Chrylser get bailout and sales fall. Is there a pattern emerging here?
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(222)
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
Turns out pot isn't an accepted form of payment at most gas stations after all
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Dog gets a parking ticket because his owner tied him to a fence outside a store
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(WWSB ABC 7)
 
 
 
The plan to undress the passed-out drunk girl and take pictures of her was going great, until the part about remembering to take the camera home
source: mysuncoast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(110)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Dad sues ex-wife to make her stop home-schooling their daughter, saying the girl is too isolated from society. Religious groups freak out, call it radical secularism. Dad: I've taken the girl to church myself, you dill-holes
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(275)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this cigar-chompin' Cuban
source: s.wsj.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(Some Lycanthrope)
 
 
 
If you are going to go around town stealing wolf statues, don't ride around with them on top of your car
source: www2.tricities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Pantless man accused of harassing horse
source: statesmanjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
For the last time: If you're a pot farmer attempting to disable a surveillance camera, cover your face. With slackjawed yokel pic
source: lacrossetribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(89)
 
(Breitbart.com)
 
 
 
Obama: Don't everybody panic, but get a swine flu shot. Seriously. But don't worry, the flu won't kill all of us. I think. Are we clear? Cool
source: breitbart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(155)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
And now, a brief visual timeline of the history of time travel. Or is that the future of time travel ?
source: informationisbeautiful.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(129)
 
(Buffalo News)
 
 
 
When Santa comes down the chimney at 2 am, you get presents. When you do it, you get multiple injuries and a criminal trespass charge
source: buffalonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(17)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Not news: man suspects girlfriend is cheating. News: holds her hostage for 4 days and she still won't admit it. Fark: so he shaves her head
source: 10tv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(97)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Not news: Ohio judge silences defendant. Fark: With duct tape
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(Asbury Park Press)
 
 
 
Don't you just hate it when you call a kid, threaten to kill him and his mother and fail to realize you called the police station
source: app.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Best-selling bible to be edited and re-released, will feature deleted commandments, digitally enhanced plagues, and Han casts the first stone
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(309)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Elderly-on-elderly violence on the rise. Police report finding victims with all their teeth missing
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Wife of man who abducted and kept woman for 18 years now being considered more than an accomplice
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(194)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Not news: Misbehaving military contractors. News: Misbehaving US embassy guards in Afghanistan. Fark: They were taking vodka shots out of each others' buttcracks
source: motherjones.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(112)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
'C' is for cookie dough contaminated with E. coli O157:H7. That's good enough for me
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(109)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Iran brags about its "nuclear package", probably drives a Hummer as well
source: us.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(Some Pro)
 
 
 
Golf pro arrested for attempted hole in 8
source: wsbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(118)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Sex without orgasm is the secret to sexual happiness. Millions of "happy" women mysteriously fail to nod in agreement
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(636)
 
(People Magazine)
 
 
 
What should the Duggars name baby # 19? Difficulty: must begin with the letter 'J'
source: people.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(550)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
2009: A diet rich in fish and nuts may prolong your life. 2105: New Megan Fox film opens
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
From each according to his combo size, to each according to his community service
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(122)
 
(CBS 46 Atlanta)
 
 
 
The Atlanta water company that raised rates for those conserving water and shut off service to paying customers disputes the claims that its billing practices need to be looked at
source: cbsatlanta.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(93)
 
(Portland Press Herald)
 
 
 
Weirdest fetish outside of wearing a bunny suit and being beaten by an elderly man dressed as Charo: Guy likes to climb into national forest pit toilets
source: pressherald.mainetoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(105)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
This story has it all: A girl in a bikini, her boyfriend with a camera, a perverted Polish Yeti, a great name for a rock band
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Just in case you weren't taking the swine flu warnings seriously enough, here's Elmo telling you to PANIC
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
The SAT is such a horrible burden on our precious little snowflakes. Solution? Let's get rid of the whole damn thing
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(320)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
A step by step guide on how to make your heart explode
source: joethepeacock.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(117)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Mexican city breaks Mariachi record. Tune in next week to see Antonio Banderas in a slightly disappointing followup
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Chupacabra has been found. It's in a freezer in Blanco, TX
source: wbaltv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(105)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these scary cellar dwellers
source: my-expressions.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Dragon*Con Fark Party - Saturday, 3:00pm, Atlanta Hilton lobby lounge. DIT
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(87)
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
Alberta battling to maintain rat-free status, official blames rats on Obama's economic policies
source: calgaryherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(MetroWest Daily News)
 
 
 
Man's attempt to conceal raw meat in his pants foiled when police dog wants steak
source: metrowestdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Newspapers that cut costs are laying off their younger reporters, leaving aging baby boomers to cover youth-oriented stuff like Comic Book Con and The Twitter
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(178)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Today Show exclusive: the Duggars are adding a 19th seat to the clown car. The world, much like the vagina, yawns
source: today.msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(586)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Brookfield Zoo dolphins FedEx'd to Minnesota, likely sent Next Day Sea
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(delaware online)
 
 
 
What is the best car to use in a bank robbery? A super fast Chevy Aveo of course. Unless you leave the keys in the bank. But then again walking would probably be faster anyway
source: delawareonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Educator steals $150,000 from scholarship fund, gets 69 months in prison. That time'll pass lickety-split
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
FAIL: Man seriously injures himself on prison fence razor wire. FLORIDA: While attempting to get in
source: news4jax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(Examiner)
 
 
 
Today the Wheel of Media Fearmongering™ lands on rabid bats. (with weird "batdog" pic)
source: examiner.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(ICNetwork)
 
 
 
Problem: Men meeting in the woods for gay sex trysts. Solution: Release the rampaging pigs
source: iccoventry.icnetwork.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(143)
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
That ROTC student who accosted a Muslim girl for not standing during the Pledge of Allegience? Yeah, she made that part up
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(557)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Fashion designer sentenced for sex assaults, making fat people self-conscious
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
You aren't a Mad Max fan until you've built your own Thunderdome
source: entertainment.timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(121)
 
(WCBS 880)
 
 
 
A 29-year-old Bridgeport woman has a court date next week to face charges stemming from her arrest Saturday, her other arrest Saturday, and her third arrest on Saturday
source: wcbs880.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
Old and busted: The Green River Killer. New hotness: The Georgetown Cuddler?
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 
(Wired UK)
 
 
 
Tetris alters the structure of your brain, lining the cells up and then deleting them one row at a time
source: wired.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
The coolest photos of a city burning you'll see, hopefully, ever
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(210)
 
(Eating Our Words)
 
 
 
Satan's Whiskers. Monkey Gland. Corpse Reviver #2. Voodoo ingredients? No; it's the list of 100 cocktails everyone should try before they die
source: blogs.houstonpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(77)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Photoshop this Russian with a bent nose
source: inapcache.boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
There's a reason most airplane cockpits don't come equipped with a minibar
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Australian guy claims his cat can talk. Bonus weirdness: But all it knows is George Carlin's Seven Dirty Words
source: ntnews.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Not news: A southern US state may be hit with a hurricane. Fark: Arizona
source: nhc.noaa.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(144)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Men's underwear is an economic indicator, which explains why everything is crap right now
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(SLO Tribune)
 
 
 
Pismo proposes panacea for pigeon-pooping problem plaguing pier, Pacific purity
source: sanluisobispo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(SF Weekly)
 
 
 
Fifty-year old women, two-year old breasts, twenty five-year old dudes. Yeah, it's a Cougar Convention
source: blogs.sfweekly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(744)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Heavy drinkers found to be more active than non-drinkers. Mostly because of the long, meandering walks home at 2am
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(Southern Poverty Law Center)
 
 
 
Turns out "Aloha" is the native Hawaiian word for "Kill Whitey"
source: splcenter.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(576)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Saddam Hussein's missing air force has been found - being towed behind a tractor in Serbia
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(77)
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
What's the best thing to do when you're handcuffed in the back of a police car for DUI? Steal the police car, of course
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 


Mon August 31, 2009
(Michael Yon in Afghanistan)
 
 
 
"The problem is not that Americans and others supported the Mujahadin...The problem is not the artificial boundaries penciled in by the British all over Asia and the Middle East. The people are backwards and many want it that way"
source: michaelyon-online.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(148)
 
(Some Chick)
 
 
 
Mom feels daughter's bus stop is too far from home, does she: a) complain to the school, b) tell the district, or c) throw her hair, jewelry and shoes on the ground and climb in bus to beat up driver while kids scatter out emergency exits?
source: wsoctv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(WCBStv.com)
 
 
 
School tells students to stop touching, student body president responds that they are not touching and that the student body finger is at least two inches from the school's face
source: wcbstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Man in a van collecting stories of the recession, living down by the river
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(LBC 97.3)
 
 
 
Not news: Bank insists on thumbprint from man in order to cash check. Fark: Man has no arms
source: wtsp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(166)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop Ronald McDonald and the solar panels
source: greenmountainenergy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
The Farmer's Almanac predicts it is coing to be a colder than usual winter for most of the country. Make that, "really going to be cold _ very, very cold, very, very frigid, with a lot of snow" kind of cold
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(211)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Actual headline: "A cleaner Cedar Rapids, 1 butt at a time." Now that's a nasty crack -- I hope they wipe this headline
source: gazetteonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Park bans drum circle because of noise complaints. "If you're holding a drum you're getting a $250 ticket"
source: vancouversun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(170)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Quadriplegic woman sails around Britain solo... well, except for the six "back-up" people who worked for 4 months without a day off to keep her from being sharkbait
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Nearly a third of all cocaine is tainted with veterinary de-worming agents. So if you're a worm-infested coke addict, now you've got that going for you too
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
We've all done it: Man skips out on $188 Hooters tab, hides under bed
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
They took a gamble on excessive spending and lost. Entire board of Ontario Lottery and Gaming resigns
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
And so it's come to this: Coolio is playing concerts at sandwich shops in rural Colorado
source: coloradodaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(133)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Fire officials in SoCal wildfires: "GTFO." Residents: "STFU." Fire: "NOM NOM NOM." Residents: "OMG." Fire department: "DIAF"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(305)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Florida teacher who lost her job simply because she wore a bikini is now a pron star. With yes you would picture
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(350)
 
(Rochester Post-Bulletin)
 
 
 
News: Suspect eludes cops despite being tazed twice and shot. Fark: Suspect is a llama
source: postbulletin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(KGW.com)
 
 
 
"When [police] see four legs in there they say 'there are two legs too many in this loo, somebody needs to come out'"
source: kgw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(Buffalo News)
 
 
 
More and more preachers are holding Sunday morning services in unused theaters. "We would have our service, and then we would pack it all up in a box, and then "Spider-Man' would begin."
source: buffalonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(88)
 
(Slashdot)
 
 
 
Woman Fired For Using Uppercase in Email
source: idle.slashdot.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(222)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
The state of Tennessee wants you to save the heads of squirrels and rabbits. I offer this as further proof that the government has fallen into the hands of zombies
source: dnj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Nanny State can now ban you from drinking for two years for "behaving anti-socially." UK Farkers last seen fleeing to Canada
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(103)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Los Angeles wildfire doubles in size overnight: over 134 square miles now on fire. Everybody outside of LA, PANIC. Everybody in LA, remain calm but listen to the radio, prepare your supplies and plan your exit route
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(237)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Surprisingly, the article titled "'Bringing the Gold Coast to the brown coast" is not about reversing your underwear
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Gardener in England banned from local vegetable competitions because he won too often
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(89)
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
No one told this woman that a drive-thru lane obligates you to drive all the way through it before passing out with a half-eaten burger in your lap
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(Montreal gazette)
 
 
 
Weather forecast for Quebec City: Sunny with dead birds falling from the sky, accumulations of up to a dozen of avians expected in some areas
source: montrealgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(Corpus Christi Caller-Times)
 
 
 
After 8 days adrift in the Gulf of Mexico, living on crackers and beer, 3 men found alive by local car dealer
source: caller.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(103)
 
(WTAE-TV)
 
 
 
News: mugging suspects located. Fark: by GPS in victim's iPhone they stole
source: thepittsburghchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Drew)
 
 
 
Drew calls the betting line on swine flu, oil prices and other items that will be in the news this week. Also, some of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 8/23 - 8/29
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(Daily Illini)
 
 
 
Hidden pig found in Dutch painting
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(101)
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
"RCMP on Friday responded to several false alarms where a slow-moving citizen patrol group has called the RCMP about another slow-moving citizen patrol group perceived as acting suspiciously"
source: edmontonjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
World gravy championship finally finds an excuse for British food
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(37)
 
(Some Snitch)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Snitches get Stitches. New Hotness: Snitches get beaten, 50 stab wounds, a nail in the head and dismembered
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(266)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Hey, Jack; stop shoving carrots into the ass
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(54)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Britain's experience during WWII would forever change the nation. Maybe that's why they drink so much: They're scared beer will be rationed again
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(134)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Two men arrested after getting off someone's lawn
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(37)
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Guy tells police he's drunk and has lots of guns, and will shoot anyone who tries to make him pay his cab fare
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(37)
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
Just wait until the kids are old enough to understand that their dad is the "33rd Empress of the Imperial Sovereign Court of the Wild Rose"
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(66)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Photoshop this pew pew pew pew
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(57)
 
(Nola.com)
 
 
 
Army Corps of Engineers halts floodwall project near New Orleans because they might hit an ancient Indian burial mound. The last thing they need is more bad karma
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(83)
 
(STLToday)
 
 
 
If a plane is flying too close to your house do you: c) Head off to the runway to shoot it down. Bonus: with a .22
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(104)
 
(Some Internet Monk)
 
 
 
Not News: "When the coming evangelical collapse happens, and especially when thousands of our young people bolt for non-believer status, a lot of it will be COMPLETELY DESERVED." Fark: ...says an evangelical Baptist
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(659)
 
(wptv.com)
 
 
 
Ten-year old collects vacuum cleaners in his spare time. Out to prove his hobby doesn't suck
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(51)