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Sun August 30, 2009
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Man claims to have irrefutable proof of monstrous, hairy monster living in Poland: "I never really believed the local stories of a wild mountain ape-man. But now I do"
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(116)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this oddly placed passage
source: 1.bp.blogspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Proving that a vegetarian lifestyle doesn't always work, Terry Schiavo's father dies of heart failure
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(173)
 
(WTFark)
 
Plug
 
BJ LOOKER: Old Drunk Man In Tuxedo Is Caught Receiving Oral Sex In An Alley. So Naturally, He Pulls Out A Gun And Opens Fire. No, Not *That* Gun. A Real Gun.
 
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
On Sunday's edition of Media Fearmongering™: Swimming pools will kill you
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
San Francisco's police chief proposes amnesty program. For his police officers
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(105)
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
The hidden benefits of traffic tickets. Missing: giving Farkers another reason to whine about police brutality in their sheltered lives
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(159)
 
(Reason Magazine)
 
 
 
Forget death panels. If you're really interested in putting a stop to the public option (and some truly entertaining town hall meetings), let's talk circumcision panels
source: reason.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(184)
 
(Atheist Revolution)
 
 
 
Ok, so you all know what atheists don't believe. Here's what they DO believe
source: atheistrev.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(447)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Former first daughter Jenna Bush to join the "Today" show; submitter unsure if she is the hot drunk one or the fat drunk one
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(144)
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Why Americans hate fat people
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(457)
 
(Wordpress)
 
 
 
Woman called "delusional" and held against her will in psychiatric ward for saying 9/11 was inside job, being delusional. This should end well
source: clareswinney.wordpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(478)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Apparently in Baltimore if you want to rent out a Police Helicopter and Officers to set up a proposal to your girlfriend it'll only cost ya $300
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
It's chic, it's mainstream, it's... marijuana?
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(243)
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
The perfect Xmas gift for your little Miley Cyrus fan: It rotates. It has blinking lights, a disco ball, and a pole. It's the Pole Dancer doll
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Chicago is being invaded by thin crust pizza. EVERYBODY PANIC
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(479)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
For some, the "Religious Views" box on their Facebook profile represents 10 throwaway characters to type. For others, it represents a long, personal journal of self-reflection, cotemplation, and soul-searching
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(229)
 
(Stevens Point Journal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this baseball player
source: stevenspointjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(Some Cornhusker)
 
 
 
Couple falls behind on their mortgage, turns to the Federal Loan Modification Law Center. Several months later, they discover the FLMLC is a scam, and they're losing their home. Pity they didn't get the $8,000 tax credit
source: journalstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(120)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Hate clamshell packaging? Don't bother with scissors, they're way too useful
source: green.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(188)
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Obama's FEMA chief wants to reduce the role of "government-centric" emergency management, urges American citizens to "change behavior" and prepare to fend for themselves in a disaster. Sounds like a heckuva job
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(220)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Apparently there are rules to decorating your cubicle. Subby still prefers to knock out a wall to get a nice view out the window before heading into a meeting with the Bobs
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Man gets 15 years for biting off cop's index finger. Can you digit?
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"The canoe is to Canada what the horse was to the United States." And not just because it allows Canadians to simulate U.S. beer by being farking close to water
source: independent.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(75)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Snowflakes now killing each other at school over lunch tables... who knew a lunch place was THAT important?
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(119)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Sam: 0, Ralph: 120
source: missoulian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(138)
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
His hair is long, most teeth are gone, what about that hat he's got on? Most people get high on drugs or wines, but this guy's gotta face it, he's addicted to signs. Oh yeah
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(SanDiegoUnionTribune)
 
Weeners
 
Over 350 hang out at the wiener nationals
source: www3.signonsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"Police investigating a burglary are appealing for anyone who has been offered cheap whisky or unusual coins to get in touch."
source: derbyshiretimes.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(12)
 
(WMTW.com)
 
 
 
Maine man sentenced to five years in prison and $95k restitution for illegally getting wood
source: wmtw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Feeling stressed - try a bunny cafe (w/video). Happy Bunday
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 
(Some Zoo)
 
 
 
Photoshop this minty fresh hippo
source: dentalhealthblog.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(TheReader.es)
 
 
 
Neighborhood watch apprehends burglar with 1,000 Euros in his anus
source: thereader.es   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(Rasmussen Reports)
 
 
 
51% of American adults say alcohol more dangerous than marijuana, 25% say they're equal, 24% want some pizza
source: rasmussenreports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(485)
 


Sat August 29, 2009
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Ex-cop living in Siberia says he's the son of God. "His followers, who have given up their lives to follow him, are strict vegans and are banned from smoking and drinking or handling money."
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(139)
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
"'We are investigating because cows growing up in the mountains normally can estimate dangers and do not plunge down cliffs"
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Update on memorial efforts for Farker Arelas' family. LGT earlier thread
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(75)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Don't it make my brown eyes blue?
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(190)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Class action lawsuit alleges sunscreen makers misled consumers about effectiveness of the products. Man, are their faces red
source: citytv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
India loses contact with an unmanned spacecraft conducting its first moon mission. Support techs ask Mission Control to confirm that the spacecraft is turned on and that it is currently plugged in
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(140)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
"Nudity and jellyfish just don't mix"
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Click to see Glenn Beck making creepy passes at Dina Sansing, stay for the awkward silence
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(232)
 
(Examiner)
 
 
 
Caption two of our greatest living ex-Presidents
source: image3.examiner.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(212)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Thanks Farkers, from Arelas' family
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(106)
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
The Chicago Tribune ponders: "Is your backyard play set unsafe?" All parents to your helicopters, I repeat all parents to your helicopters
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(112)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
For all you law nerds and constitutional scholars: the Ninth Circuit's MLB case has put a stop to law enforcement's exploitation of the "plain view" doctrine in computer searches
source: blogs.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(97)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
The world's strangest conventions, furries mysteriously absent
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(123)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this perched parrot
source: upload.wikimedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(PNJ)
 
 
 
Burglar, with balls of steel, comes back and takes the TV he left at the crime scene while the cops are still there. That's some fine police work there, Lou
source: pnj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
It's Saturday afternoon -- don't you hanker for a hunk of cheese?
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(116)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Who needs anti-depressants when we have beer?
source: scienceblog.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Memphis mayoral candidate proposes issuing Uzis and machine guns to citizens to fight crime
source: current.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(114)
 
(Austin Statesman)
 
 
 
Schlotzkied
source: statesman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
While bullets, mortars, bombs and IEDs are deemed healthy by the military, smoking gets a closer look. Beer looks over its shoulder
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(The Newspaper)
 
 
 
No matter what the cop says, it's legal to drive through South Dakota with a can of Red Bull
source: thenewspaper.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(231)
 
(Daily Yomiuri)
 
 
 
Standing-only bars mushroom throughout Tokyo with funky layouts, reasonable food and drink prices. 'Many customers simply lean against the bar while enjoying their drinks. This manner of drinking is dubbed the "Dark style"'
source: yomiuri.co.jp   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
16 of 24 countries surveyed think the U.S. is pretty much okay these days. The others don't recommend their patients chew gum
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(99)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
People being able to post in real time that they are not at home a boon to burglars. Obvious tag is breaking into your house, stealing your stuff, laughing at your status update
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(Iowa City Press-Citizen)
 
 
 
Police arrest members of a shoplifting ring that plagued the Iowa City region for months. The suspects are nine teenagers under sixteen that stole snack foods from local convenience stores
source: press-citizen.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Just in case you ever win a $325 million lottery, here are some helpful tips on how to spend the money. Free TotalFark for everyone suprisingly absent from the list
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(129)
 
(Eye Weekly)
 
 
 
Three reasons to head to Toronto this weekend. Chocolate. Covered. Bacon
source: eyeweekly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Blind man's repeated complaints about cars parking on his sidewalk lead police to arrest him and take away his guide dog
source: hampshirechronicle.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(128)
 
(adn.com)
 
 
 
Bummer of a birthmark, Hal
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
The World Health Organization has really got the EVERYBODY PANIC thing down to a science as they warn of the new and improved Super Swine Flu
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(75)
 
(WMTW.com)
 
 
 
A carrot a day keeps the dentist away
source: wmtw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(SacBee)
 
 
 
Not news: You have a dispute with your landlord. News: He sets up a homeless camp in your backyard, violating city ordinance. Fark: City responds "LA LA LA CAN'T HEAR YOU."
source: sacbee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(141)
 
(WMTW.com)
 
 
 
Caledonia County Fair officials are afraid somebody might get sick and blame it on the pigs, so there will be no porkers this year
source: wmtw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(Dude... you're like...old)
 
 
 
Confessions of a 59-year-old dorm rat
source: magic-city-news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
Woman drops off computer to have CD drive replaced, Best Buy pulls an auto mechanic on her and replaces enough equipment to stick her with a $1700 bill
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(319)
 
(Burnleycitizen)
 
 
 
Tizzie the cat hopes being 36 years old will get her listed in the Guinness Book of Caturdays
source: burnleycitizen.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(617)
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
On the 4th anniversary of Katrina, a big thanks from all us Gulf Coast Farkers
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(92)
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Road project held up because piece of bridge is six inches too long. Subby swears it was closer to eight inches, wife says it was more like four
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
Woman licks husband after catching him licking another woman in bar
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Photoshop Challenge: Create your own sand sculpture
source: images.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Sorority pledges forced to eat cat food, fraternity pledges willingly ate sor... oh, you get it
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(77)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Some images need no headlines
source: toplessrobot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Not satisfied with residents being thrown into a blasted alcohol-free desert, Utah unveils new "mom screaming at you" DUI campaign
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(Cracked)
 
 
 
5 badass movie characters you didn't know were real people
source: cracked.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
But officer, the horse was completely sober
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
"A third, clearly overcome by emotion, held the photo close to her chest -- then ate it."
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Please don't crap in the shellfish beds
source: seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Residents of Wisconsin still cannot conceal carry, but starting Tuesday, 10-year-olds can go hunting
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Today's WTF from Japan: A Gundam-themed cosplay wedding
source: mdn.mainichi.jp   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(News4Jax)
 
 
 
Mom bucks school's new parking system when she skips long line of cars by picking up daughter from school on horseback. Neighlarity ensues
source: news4jax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(104)
 
(Reuters AlertNet)
 
 
 
North Korean ship bound for Iran seized by UAE and contained rocket launchers, detonators, RPGs and blow-up dolls. Countries linked include Australia, France, Italy, China. Those bastards, all of them
source: alertnet.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(82)
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Ad agency sues Microsoft because their commerical infringes on their patent that covers the "advertising concept in which a commercial serves to advance the plot of the TV show". Same agency also considering patenting the Stupid Tag
source: blog.seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(I Heart Chaos)
 
 
 
Maybe you can get away with bringing your own Xbox, monitor and wi-fi to the library, but once you start screaming at your teammates in CoD4, expect to get thrown out
source: iheartchaos.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Ugly-ass echidna celebrates first birthday (with ugly-ass pic)
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 


Fri August 28, 2009
(Waterloo Courier)
 
 
 
Man arrested for threatening to release mustard gas at Taco John's. To end this headline with a PSA about not riding away on a bicycle, turn to page 4. To end this headline with a joke about gas and Taco John's, turn to page 10
source: wcfcourier.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
US Government gives Mattel exemption from safety testing, Mr. Potato Lead to follow shortly. Your Barbie wants a hazmat suit
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(SpaceVidCast)
 
 
 
Launch Attempt 3: Discovery launches to the ISS carrying COLBERT tonight at 11:59pm EDT. LGT HD feed
source: spacevidcast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(289)
 
(Florida Today)
 
 
 
Swine flu present in all schools
source: floridatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 
(Florida Today)
 
 
 
Swine flu not present in schools
source: floridatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(12)
 
(KNBC 4 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
DJ AM stars in reality version of "Final Destination"
source: nbclosangeles.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(224)
 
(CBS3.com)
 
 
 
Toddler who wandered away from daycare caught by two state police officers; boy may be charged with resisting a rest
source: cbs3.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Son of Murdoch: It's just not fair: we can't buy the BBC and if we put out crap like Fox News in the UK OFCOM would throw us off the air for lying
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(208)
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
Deputy who investigated illegal backyard encampment in 2006 failed to notice sex slave living there, didn't know owner was a registered sex offender, because he didn't check. That's some extra-fine police work, Lou
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(181)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
This week's Smoking Gun mugshot lineup: Popeye's visit to the slammer
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(209)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop Theme: How-to books we'd like to see
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(Buffalo News)
 
 
 
If you're going to pull out a gun in a fit of road rage, try not to accidentally shoot yourself in the leg
source: buffalonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Elderly seem to be immune to H1N1. Man, government run Medicare and Medicaid really work
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Not news: Man accused of sexual battery goes on trial. News: Commits suicide before the verdict. Fark: Not guilty
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
10 secrets your dentist doesn't want you to know. 'You don't have to take your pants off to have your teeth checked' surprisingly absent
source: dailyfinance.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(101)
 
(Click On Detroit)
 
 
 
First date advice - DO: Steal her heart. DON'T: Steal her car
source: clickondetroit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Chicken and duck become inseparable, delicious companions
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(WAFF)
 
 
 
If you are called to come over to see your ex-girlfriend, watch out for the guy in the closet with the baseball bat
source: waff.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
"Hey, can I borrow a flashlight, gas can and a shovel? Ignore the woman in the car begging you to call the cops, it's nothing. Thanks."
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(89)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
REMINDER: Fark Party in Downtown Los Angeles at Casey's Irish Pub on Aug 29
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man freed from hole. Your mom inconsolable
source: phillyburbs.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(WATE-TV)
 
 
 
Today's "Burglar steals furnace then sells it back to owner via Craiglist" story brought to you by Knoxville, TN
source: wate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
Aquarium transformer starts fire, which shatters aquarium, which puts out fire. Taa daaa
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(75)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Fort Lauderdale police department is the latest to use the "Pied Piper for the Criminally Stupid" method of finding people with outstanding warrants
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(124)
 
(WCBStv.com)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Nigerians inheriting millions and wiring it to your bank account. New hotness: Nigerians hacking into your Facebook account and asking your friends to loan you money
source: wcbstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Ancient burial site discovered in Greece. No sign of nine-headed monsters; the land was de-hydrated
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(96)
 
(C|Net)
 
 
 
Having learned from Iran, the US Senate has proposed a bill that would give the President the authority to "declare a cybersecurity emergency" and "turn off the internet." What could possibly go wro
source: news.cnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(344)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
It's just not a real British wedding until the bride is smashing a beer glass into the face of one of the bridesmaids
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(72)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Dear ladies: you know all those minor imperfections that you've been dwelling on all these years? The guy's perspective: we actually don't notice them
source: joethepeacock.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(631)
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
Theme park provides hypnotherapist to convince adults that they enjoy hearing their children screaming
source: calgaryherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Is "moist" a dirty word? How about "hardscrabble," "pugilist," "squall" and "giggle"? "Creamy"? "Navel?" "Panties?" Moist, creamy panties? Sweet jesus
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(376)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Want high wages and low taxes? Move to Switzerland. (Everyone's got health coverage, too.)
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(204)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Never bring a belt buckle to a spatula fight
source: theday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
If you're having a dispute with a store manager over the bed you just bought, what better way to express your dissatisfaction than by driving your Rolls-Royce through the wall of the store? (pic)
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Some Hero)
 
 
 
Superhero Smackdown: Iron Man vs Superman, who would win?
source: thecorrectness.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(464)
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
55 year old man arrested for riding his bike around town while wearing only a thong
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Eagle Tribune)
 
 
 
Attention Lord Family, the workers at Hilldale Cemetary have found your dog, Tramp. Please come and pick it up
source: eagletribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(11)
 
(Think Progress)
 
 
 
Tokyo is suffering a rash of shoplifting and criminal behavior. By old people. And they are doing it because they are lonely and want human contact. Ahhh...Japan
source: yglesias.thinkprogress.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
Best log carved into a fox by a guy with a chainsaw video you'll see all day
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Mythical creatures in Venn Diagram form
source: andrewsullivan.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
You have managed to steal the identity of Governor Jim Douglas of Vermont. Do you: C) Send Governor Douglas a few laptops
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Building manager posts pics of man who urinated in lobby, complete with "SMALL PENIS ALERT" caption
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(KTVU)
 
 
 
Finally, medical science makes a worthwhile discovery. Marijuana protects your brain from damage caused by excessive drinking
source: ktvu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(182)
 
(News Times)
 
 
 
8-year-old "Chicken Whisperer" teaches fowl to lay on their backs. Must be a great way to pick up chicks
source: newstimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
Old post office site goes to anonymous buyer, just like several of the packages you shipped
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(My Fox Philly)
 
 
 
325 million dollar drawing tonight in New Jersey. Still not enough money to get rid of the smell in Elizabeth
source: myfoxphilly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(Lancashire Evening Post)
 
 
 
49-year-old mum does a charity walk to work dressed in a St Trinian's schoolgirl uniform
source: lep.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(BDCwire)
 
 
 
A gas can and a lighter not a good match
source: wbbm780.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(New York Sun)
 
 
 
Photoshop this close play
source: nysun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(Mercury News)
 
 
 
The sorry sack of crap who kidnapped Jaycee 18 years ago and forced her to bear two of his kids says it's really a heartwarming story
source: mercurynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(694)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Friday Photo Fun from the guys at TSG: What band do these perps have in common? Contest ends at 4pm Eastern
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(214)
 
(Time)
 
 
 
"There is nothing bacon does not improve. Bacon is the new black"
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(116)
 
(Western Australia Today)
 
 
 
China enjoys it when the Australian PM visits because they remember the fantastic mutual orgasm they shared several years ago
source: watoday.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Dutch courts put 13-year-old female sailor into state custody to keep her from being the youngest solo sailer to go around the world. They ruled she is too young for a dutch rudder
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(238)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Former KFC now sells marijuana. You'll not only lick your fingers, you'll stare at them for hours
source: blogs.laweekly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
It's cheaper to pay the bribe to the Moscow traffic cop when he pulls you over because they'll really screw you if you fight the ticket in court
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(The Morning Call)
 
 
 
Psychiatric aide trainee pleads guilty to giving a patient nails and teaching her how to swallow them. Yeah, she's screwed
source: mcall.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(Press-Enterprise (So. Cal))
 
 
 
Protip: If you're transporting 28,000 lbs of marijuana in a semi trailer, don't cut off a sheriff's deputy on the freeway
source: pe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(Some Penny Pincher)
 
 
 
Money saving tip: pretend to be gay in Las Vegas and save $10
source: dumbassdaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(78)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Good news: it's now okay if Uruguay in Uruguay
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(SB Independent)
 
 
 
Driver ends road test by rearranging DMV furniture (with pic goodness)
source: independent.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(Some Googler)
 
 
 
Results 1 - 10 of about 25,600,000 for "fire escape" (0.54 seconds)
source: news.bnonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Peoria Journal Star)
 
 
 
If you're wanted for attempting to steal a car, its probably not a good idea to go into a police station on the same day asking for money for a bus ticket. Fark: Thief accepted police chief's invitation to come into his office
source: pjstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(10)
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
3 arrested in 75 cent robbery
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
Photoshop another use for this tower, or these goats
source: upload.wikimedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
If you're a tax dodger don't brag about it on Facebook or MySpace
source: online.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(Examiner)
 
 
 
How celestials (entities able to travel throughout the universe through willpower alone and are not confined to any physical location) assist humanity with extraterrestrial life
source: examiner.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(131)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
You don't need to look over here. We're not preparing to invade Taiwan or anything. Seriously. Stop with the looking over here. Or we'll quit funding the stimulus
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(100)
 
(nbc4i.com)
 
 
 
Newsy: Remember the teacher that burned the cross in the kid's arm? The school district settled for $115,500. Fark: Lawyers get 96% of the money
source: www2.nbc4i.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(102)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Because you don't have enough nightmare fuel in your life, it's time to meet Heathcliffe, the giant burrowing cockroach and a contender for the title of world's heaviest insect
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Headline goes here please
source: roanoke.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(Springfield Republican)
 
 
 
"It's not illegal, Tucker said, to offer somebody a lollipop."
source: masslive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(Queerty.com)
 
 
 
Not news: Being late for a court date. Still not news: Concerning the validity of your marriage license. Sorta news: When you're both female. FARK: And the future of your country's LGBT community rests on your argument
source: queerty.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Tactical canned bacon stays "edible" for 10 years. The most worrying part about this article are the quote marks around "edible"
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Not news: Fossil feathers found. News: 40 million year old color deduced from those fossil feathers. Fark: Reported accurately and responsibly by Fox News
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(302)
 
(9 News)
 
 
 
In Denver, you'll soon be able to pay for marijuana fines with the loose change in your pocket
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(96)
 


Thu August 27, 2009
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
And now, for no particular reason, a giant butter Yoda
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(WSBTV)
 
 
 
Well, the school bus hijacker technically wasn't naked since he was wearing a condom
source: wsbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
"Know what they call a shooting at McDonald's in Quebec?" "They don't call it a shooting at McDonald's?" "Nah, man, they got the metric system, they wouldn't know what the fark that is."
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(97)
 
(Scotsman)
 
 
 
Scot pays £230,000 for a sheep: "It's an incredibly chunky animal with a tremendous back end"
source: thescotsman.scotsman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
ProTip: If you're a gubernatorial hopeful and you're asked about your state's licensed wolf hunt, don't say you'd buy a license to hunt Barack Obama
source: khq.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(193)
 
(Phoenix New Times)
 
 
 
Latest overblown teen sex hysteria: vodka tampons and anal beer bongs
source: blogs.phoenixnewtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(152)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Make new retro propaganda posters for our time. Link goes to an example
source: s2.buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(101)
 
(WGAL 8)
 
 
 
PA signs law that outlaws DIY dog surgeries. Sorry you are going to have to see a vet to give your dog a c-section
source: wgal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
US-EU Plan To "Move" Earth Orbit Doomed, Say Russian Scientists
source: whatdoesitmean.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Schwarzenegger uses Twitter to ask Californians for ideas to close budget gap. Answer: Legalize (and tax) it
source: govtech.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(233)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Snake handler dies from bite. A bittersweet end to an otherwise charming life
source: kalingatimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
Dress code for restaurants at the Waldorf-Astoria: "Bull & Bear: Casual elegance. Peacock Alley: Elegant business. Starbucks: Smart casual." Huh? To go to Starbucks? (pic)
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(129)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
"Hello, this is a courtesy call to let you know that the Federal Trade Commission is going to stomp mudholes in the asses of telemarketing robocallers."
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(169)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Anagram Tube Map shows Londoners the way from Browny Helmet to Queerer Elastic via A Retard Cottonmouth
source: thelondonpaper.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Sorry I'm late. My bus driver was arrested for forcible confinement and assault
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(12)
 
(CTV)
 
 
 
Auschwitz blueprints given to Israeli PM, you know, "just in case"
source: ctv.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(299)
 
(Detroit News)
 
 
 
Guy finds his stolen car with a guy inside shot to death. Hey, free deadguy
source: detnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
Two women try to force another car off the road, flash gang signs, and then throw a bottle of perfume at the car. "Watch me kill you"
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Wordpress)
 
 
 
Ah, Fark's favorite state, where it's legal to beat your kids as long as you aren't gay
source: milbergsmusings.wordpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(145)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Not news: soldiers find naked woman in raid of Iraqi house. News: it's Picasso's "Naked Woman," stolen in 1990 and worth $10 million
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(110)
 
(azfamily.com)
 
 
 
TV reporter investigates why fast food restaurants put so much ice in their drinks. "They've done a lot of studies and they have found out that the more ice you put in the drink, the better it tastes, the better it looks"
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(263)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Fruit sex outrage hits Britain. This is not a repeat from Penny Arcade
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(106)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Problem: Depressed people keep jumping of a bridge. Do you c) smear it with butter?
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(78)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
CA highspeed rail, which would help the environment by reducing vehicles on the road, may be derailed by environmentalists
source: bizjournals.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(235)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man busted in a cockfighting ring sues the Humane Society for hurting his birds
source: madison.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
The Dutch discover petrified forests on the moon
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Inappropriate amusement park rides
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(WKYC)
 
 
 
School honors student wearing 'my pen is enormous' shirt ... standardized testing has never been this much fun
source: wkyc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(Daily Sparks Tribune)
 
 
 
Today's ready made Fark headline; "Chicken owner shoots own leg while hunting opossum" brought to you courtesy of Mount Vernon, Washington
source: charlotteobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
Brunch is killing the breakfast meal and hangovers may be the only thing to save it. "Many people now consider a poached egg on a piece of toast an extravagance"
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(139)
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
So after 18 years this girl walks into a police station
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(271)
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
"Due to unforeseen circumstances, the clairvoyant column will not be published for a few weeks"
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 
(BDCwire)
 
 
 
In this day of overtly sexy ads, internet porn, and sexting, burlesque is making a comback
source: wbbm780.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(1066)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
City supplies kids with spray paint and leaves them unsupervised to paint mural in skate park. This works out about how you'd expect (w/ pic)
source: calgarysun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(245)
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
8 inch long pliable rubber device selling for under $20 may be miracle cure for tennis elbow
source: well.blogs.nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(146)
 
(Pal-Item)
 
 
 
Remember that Indiana high school that suspended over 169 students last week for violating their new fascist dress code? Hundreds of parents attended board meeting last night only to be told to give up and call the whambulance
source: pal-item.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(427)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
The "rebellious, but has always been a part of China" province of Taiwan to host a state visit from the "deposed feudal leader of the rebellious, but has always been a part of China" province of Tibet
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
Wood carver cracks ancient Royal code, all without any help from Dan Brown
source: entertainment.timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
As a general rule, Art museums prefer nude paintings to actual nude women. (w/slightly Not safe for work pic)
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(107)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Gleaming the cub
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(WKRG)
 
 
 
"Hey, Baldwin County, how are ya man? Having a nice recession? Good, good... listen, remember that $7.7 million we gave you? Yeah, about that..."
source: wkrg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Cracked)
 
 
 
The five ballsiest lies ever passed off as journalism
source: cracked.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(171)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
If your license has been suspended 45 times, try to resist drinking a beer in your stolen car
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
Woman feeds her husband, four kids, one dog, two cats and a rabbit on $4 a week. And if money becomes even tighter, she has a plan to feed her husband and four kids on $2 a week
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(411)
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
When choosing a jewelry shop to offload the pieces you've just stolen, try to avoid the one owned by the husband of your victim
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(10)
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
Principal of Pace High School says there's nothing he can do about the school's name being owned by a porn site
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(104)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Good: The weak economy means fewer people are trying to get through the border fence. Bad: Instead, they're stealing pieces to sell for scrap metal
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
CIA learned their cold water torture techniques by reading a Canadian government guide to swimming in Canada. Really
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(112)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
If you rob a bank every Thursday, sooner or later police will notice the pattern
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(The Earth Times)
 
 
 
Bank installs "genderless' toilet to accomodate employee going through sex change. Naturally, (s)he is furious and screaming about discrimination at work
source: earthtimes.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(732)
 
(Some Frightened Fisherman)
 
 
 
Photoshop these blobfish
source: wptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(RedOrbit)
 
 
 
"A major decline in the proportion of Canadians suffering hip fractures may be partly due to people weighing more and having bigger buttocks, researchers say"
source: redorbit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Just another animal on the verge of extinctiWHAT THE fark IS THAT
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(197)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
House in NYC is 9.5 feet wide, 42 feet long. Much like subby's co...ndominium
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(105)
 
(Times Higher Education)
 
 
 
The annual round-up of the best snowflakeism's in this year's university exams
source: timeshighereducation.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(126)
 
(ABC Action News)
 
 
 
Police say "Stun Gun Granny" isn't even a grandmother at all. If you can't trust the word of a Subway bandit, who can you trust
source: abcactionnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(13)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Meet the "genetically impossible" male tortoiseshell cat named after Eddie Izzard (Nope, still not Caturday, but once again it's late and things are slow)
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(165)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Immaculate Confection
source: thecatholicspirit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Mexico's new drug use law worries those in the U.S. that profit from the failed War on Drugs™
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(174)
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Fed chairman Ben Bernanke was recently a victim of identity fraud by a "sophisticated crime ring". Perhaps by elite hackers, master forgers, or covert foreign infiltrators? Nope. His wife's checkbook was snatched from Starbucks
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Cash for Clunkers generates 690,114 new car sales, 41% of which were bought from Japanese automakers. Japan plans to write thank you note on pretty stationary
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(295)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
If you don't know what utility, cutter and canner beef is, or what mechanically separated chicken is, you really don't want to snap into a Slim Jim
source: slashfood.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(153)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
You may have traded one clunker for another. Toyota issues recall of 95,700 vehicles
source: rn-t.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
Fake erection draws over 200 fines from police
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 225: "Training Documents" Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 


Wed August 26, 2009
(Some Dude of the Cloth)
 
 
 
Florida pastor texts wife that he was kidnapped to conceal affair, worried wife calls police, police trace cell phone and things follow an obvious trajectory from there
source: weinterrupt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
A man learns that he is not the father of two children he believed were his, but were actually the offspring of his business partner to his then-wife. By letter. From another country. His response? Suing for child support paid
source: business.timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(173)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Photoshop these Chinese plank shoe racers
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(Cracked)
 
 
 
The 15 most baffling boasts in the history of rap. Submitter goes green like Sizzlean, Pop Rocks like Sleestak in a tub o Soylent Green
source: cracked.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(166)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Peruvian Stuffed Turkey - Allez Cuisine
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
SPCA CEO's K-9 DOA. The VIP has yet to hold a PC, as she is currently MIA, but should get KIA, or at least KP
source: wtvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(101)
 
(SciencebBlogs)
 
 
 
Pics of a rolling pub-on-a-bicycle in Tallinn Estonia, complete with bar stools, table, beer, munchies and bare-assed drunken patrons
source: scienceblogs.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Astronomers discover Planet of the Emos
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(106)
 
(Merced Sun-Star)
 
 
 
If you're trading sexual favors with women who have full neck tattoos and Sharpie eyebrows, the baseball bat beating they give you should come as no surprise (with mug shots)
source: mercedsunstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(186)
 
(Montgomery Advertiser)
 
 
 
Southern Paranormal Researchers spend several hours staring at a broom
source: montgomeryadvertiser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(99)
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Man under investigation after dropping his kid off at school. Fark: In a helicopter
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(97)
 
(Detroit News)
 
 
 
PETA wants a lighthouse because fish are tasty
source: detnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(124)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Normal: Driver of 13.5 ft tall truck uses GPS to calculate his route. Not Fark: GPS includes 12 ft tall tunnel Fark: Driver ignores warning signs on way into tunnel (VIDEO)
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(KNBC 4 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Meet the most whipped guy in the D.C. area
source: nbclosangeles.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(198)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
French security adviser kidnapped by Somali terrorists; surrenders three of them to death while he escapes
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(101)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
High blood pressure can cause.. um, something
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(BDCwire)
 
 
 
Neighbors in Chicago suburb Tinley Park Illinois, rat out each other if they don't have a city sticker and apparently don't want anyone who doesn't have one spending their money in Tinley Park
source: wbbm780.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
This weekend only - the Great California Garage Sale. Ceramic cats, golf clubs, Porsche rims, Sacramento Kings Bobbleheads - everything must go
source: govtech.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
"What's Wrong With Washington." Sorry, but an 800-word article can't even summarize a draft of an outline of the table of contents of a glossary of a card catalog of a book collection about what's wrong with Washington
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(77)
 
(New Haven Register)
 
 
 
The city of New Haven has decided to secede from CT and join China. No word yet as to what happens to families with more than one child
source: nhregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(91)
 
(Fox 5 San Diego)
 
 
 
Tongueless man arrested in emergency room after rape victim bites back
source: fox5sandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(104)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Want to look so good at your own funeral that your relatives think you might actually still be alive? Get a pacemaker
source: dailytelegraph.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(BDCwire)
 
 
 
Advice for the start of the school year: always put a name tag on your kid in case the bus driver is an idiot
source: wbbm780.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
"Rarely does an article about dietary fat inform us that fat is an essential nutrient without which we would surely die." Bring on the bacon buffet and gravy soup
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Flyover state sends juveniles to camp instead of prison. You're doing it....right?
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(93)
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
Porn-surfing thief leaves computer message bemoaning victim's office hygiene standards
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(The Tennessean)
 
 
 
Accusations against nursing home aide who sexually abused elderly stroke victims were ignored by managing company, but they made sure he stayed out of the rooms of those patients who could only scream when they saw him
source: tennessean.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(131)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Hezbollah: "Howdy neighbors -- we're just gonna set up some mortars and rockets here so we can fire 'em at Israel." Lebanese: "How about no -- does no work for you? GTFO"
source: ynetnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(322)
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
The police are not a taxi service and calling 911 for a ride isn't a good idea
source: blogs.tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
One minute, you are sitting around at the nude beach admiring the sites.....the next you are running for your life from the cloud of chlorine gas. Just another day at the Jersey Shore
source: newjerseynewsroom.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(97)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Prisoner in two-man cell found beaten to death. Police still searching for suspects
source: latimesblogs.latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(77)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Iron Photoshop ingredient: the humble toothpick
source: images.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(PJ Star)
 
 
 
Note to electrical subcontractors: when upgrading the meters on people's houses while they're not at home, please take the time to make sure you haven't started the house on fire in the process
source: pjstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(York Daily Record)
 
 
 
"We are continuing to work through the asses"
source: ydr.inyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(Toronto Sun)
 
 
 
Man sentenced for role in plot to bomb Toronto Stock Exchange over "disagreement" with Canadian foreign policy insists he isn't a hater or a lunatic
source: torontosun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(Journal-Courier)
 
 
 
Hint 1: To avoid police involvement, don't call Home Depot after hours asking how to remove a large amount of blood from your carpet
source: myjournalcourier.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Not surprising: man collapses after appendix ruptures. Not encouraging: three weeks after doctors supposedly removed it
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(175)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Ahhh...nothing like a relaxing holiday in the Caribbean. British couple is poisoned by the hotel staff, stoned, stabbed and then robbed by a local gang at the beach
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(158)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Just because the only claim to fame your town has is that Mozart may once have relieved himself there, don't let that stop you having a festival
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(Tacoma News Tribune)
 
 
 
Hey kids, remember West Nile?
source: thenewstribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Some Art Lover)
 
 
 
Artist's latest exhibit contains 50 artistic photos of unusual urban scenes. With herself in each photo. Naked (Pics artistically Not safe for work)
source: mirukim.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(243)
 
(Foobies)
 
 
 
Just about the cutest advancing plague you'll see today
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(95)
 
(Boston Herald)
 
 
 
28 year-old woman arrested for stealing $600 worth of makeup from a CVS. With pic that proves no CVS carries enough makeup for the job. (shiver)
source: bostonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(111)
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
Woman busted for spraying an air freshener all over another lady smoking outside her apartment. "I will do it again, and take it to the Supreme Court because I have the right to breathe fresh air"
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(512)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
BBC does hard-hitting exposé of Chinglish. Submitter need lift heavy heart for when Fark mod no gift green happy light on much importance submitted link
source: newsvote.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(131)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
London police instructed to remove valuables from unlocked cars to teach the owners about safety. This should end well
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(75)
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
Math teacher arrested for sexual relationship with 17 yr-old girl. Three other teachers who knew about it to be terminated, so that's four - four ruined careers ah ah ah
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(209)
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
Well-known Gun Rights advocate killed with a pillow, 43 guns stolen from his home during home invasion burglary. Calls for stricter "pillow control" laws start to the right
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(528)
 
(This is Somerset)
 
 
 
If your car's stuck in the mud with the tide coming in then just leave it man, because it's gone
source: thisissomerset.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: make a movie poster for a real life event
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(Wired.co.uk)
 
 
 
Now you too can smell like a Trekkie
source: wired.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(111)
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Firefighters discover structure fire is trickier than usual when the building starts shooting back
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Asshat scores a .393 BAC on his 22nd DUI
source: ydr.inyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(189)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
The officers said they asked the costumed performer his name and he responded by shaking his head and making "squeaking noises." They said they asked him a second time and he responded: "Monkey"
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
The next time you come up with the great idea of dumping a man alone in the wilderness for three months to make a TV show, it might be worth checking he actually has some survival training first
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(186)
 
(AFP)
 
 
 
Houston schools to ban distribution of nude photos by text message. That should solve the problem right there
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(Pocono Record)
 
 
 
Beware corrections officers, the gasman cometh
source: poconorecord.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
YouTube offers cash for smash hits. In related news, members of the "Final Countdown" cover band are besides themselves with joy
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
An amazing image on Google Earth could be the elusive proof that the Loch Ness Monster exists
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(229)
 
(Kitsap Sun)
 
 
 
McDonald's employee threatens Dane Cook impersonators. "Fail" and "Photoshop" tags overwhelmed, compromise tag selected
source: pugetsoundblogs.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Nicaragua and Costa Rica each trying to steal a river from the other by rerouting it and by clever use of flags
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Acupuncturist gets stuck with arrest record for acting like a prick
source: lohud.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(15)
 
(WINK)
 
 
 
Sex offender challenges county ordinance in court after arrest for violating "child safety zones" that keeps sex offenders 500 feet away from anywhere children might be, which might just be anywhere
source: winknews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(121)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Winner of the $260,000,000 Powerball jackpot plans to use the proceeds to help pay for education in his home state of South Carolina. Suck it, Colbert
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(124)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Arts program for juvenile delinquents teaches welding and metalworking to create metal sculptures. Out of gun parts. This should end well
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(ABC)
 
NewsFlash
 
Sen. Ted Kennedy carries on Kennedy family tradition of dying with something lodged in his brain (EDIT: highest voted TF tagline)
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(2823)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
The cat has become self-aware. Humanity's days are numbered. (No, it's not Caturday, but it is the middle of the night and things are slow)
source: shakespearessister.blogspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
RCMP investigate suspicious fire at Chrysler dealership. Initial suspects include everyone who has ever owned a Chrysler
source: edmontonjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Sales of Hummers are low. Do you (a) Cater to your base by adding firearms to your inventory (b) Sell other brands of cars (c) Mix things up to keep an old Fark meme interesting?
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
What's a BJ worth to a cop these days? A pack of cigs and a soda. With matching mug shot
source: theindychannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
Crystal Beth sells crystal meth by the crystal shore
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(KGBT-TV)
 
 
 
Blessed Be: Texas man not allowed to practice Wicca in prison
source: valleycentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(199)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
The good news is that Rat Island, Alaska will soon be looking for a new name. The bad news is that calling it Bald Eagle Island has also been ruled out
source: mcclatchydc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Chess club is going to court in hopes of proving they were pawned by a rival chess club
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 


Tue August 25, 2009
(Rome News-Tribune)
 
 
 
Fire destroys vehicle outside a car wash. If only there had been some source of water nearby
source: rn-t.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Metapsychology Review)
 
 
 
"Smitten as I am, I'm pretty sure that interacting with my cat keeps me flush with oxytocin. But, probably like most people in my own culture, I still can't imagine myself picking adherent dung from her anus."
source: metapsychology.mentalhelp.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
Veterans buried at Burr Oak cemetary are entitled to one free burial. Ensuring the remains actually belong to the veteran will cost extra, however
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Mass trial of more than 100 Iranian protestors continues. Members of Ministry confessing, admitting that Jesus built their hotrod
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(107)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Everyone in New Jersey to get free Papa John's pizza
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(130)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
'Stress' is shrinking polar bears, w/ awwwwww pics
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Couple banned from owning pet despite taking good care of pet maggots. What? Sorry, pet's maggots
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(95)
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
That new KFC chicken sandwich has nothing on this Pizza Hut pizza, each slice is 646 calorie. Oh and the crust is filled with sausage wrapped in bacon
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(164)
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this semi-submerged model
source: farm3.static.flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(152)
 
(Pal Item)
 
 
 
High school suspends 169 students while enforcing draconian dress code that bans floral prints, plaid and stripes. The ban has proven particularly burdensome for the school's grandmothers, lumberjacks and zebras
source: pal-item.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(285)
 
(TVSquad.com)
 
 
 
LA Times accidentally lists "Jackass" in Keith Olbermann's time slot in their TV guide, paper corrects their mistake by listing "Jackass" in Bill O'Reilly's time slot
source: tvsquad.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(119)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Gated all-sorority village being built on Civil War battleground. Should make next year's re-enactment a little more interesting
source: wbir.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(72)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
An unknown species of an eyeless crustacean was discovered lurking inside a lava tube beneath the seafloor, spends its time greenlighting repeat articles
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(Daily Herald)
 
 
 
Alaskan park rangers kindly ask teen to stop trying to find the 'magic bus' from 'Into the Wild' fame after they've -- twice -- had to rescue him when he got lost
source: dailyherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(151)
 
(Microsoft.com)
 
 
 
Microsoft Poland: Hooray for racism
source: dl.getdropbox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(292)
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
Small plane lands in mall parking lot in NJ. In the pilot's defense, it's pretty hard to find an open space in NJ that isn't a mall parking lot
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(92)
 
(Connecticut Post)
 
 
 
You know it's been a great night when you wander into the wrong house and the police find you passed out naked while the residents are screaming for help
source: connpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Russia denying discovery of nuclear materials on North Korean ship, also cover-up existence of shape-changing creature found under ice
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Britain's main farming union issues warning about the dangers of provoking cows; many college bars to follow suit
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(KTVU)
 
 
 
"He said he couldn't breathe -- which was too bad for him I guess"
source: ktvu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(216)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
For the next 90 days, porn can be legally sold to kids in the UK. Nanny state, indeed
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(150)
 
(Stanford)
 
 
 
A bunch of jealous pricks at Harvard claim that multitaskers don't perform well
source: news.stanford.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(100)
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this empty bedframe
source: farm3.static.flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
SAT scores are out for the class of 2009, and they show that grads are primed to compete for jobs in the sliced potato deep frying and wool pullover folding industries
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(242)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Just in time for college move in, a slide show of all the dangers of living in dorms
source: today.msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(152)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Americans aren't buying government fearmongering on swine flu
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(224)
 
(Slashfood)
 
 
 
Coming soon to a fast-food joint near you: Sweet potato fries
source: slashfood.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(211)
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
What does that shirt say? "A fished motive ills." No, that's not it. "A shill defies vomit." Nope, try again. "A shovelled misfit I." Not exactly... "A most devilish life." Wait, I think that's it
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(440)
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
David Blaine ignores lifeguard warnings not to swim and has to be rescued from high surf roiled up by Hurricane Bill. Better luck next time, Atlantic Ocean
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Step aerobics celebrates 20 sweaty, jiggly, bouncy years
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(172)
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
In wake of listeriosis crisis at Maple Leaf Foods, woman concerned she got listeria from kissing Stanley Cup. MLF Exec: "You don't need to worry. The Stanley Cup hasn't been in contact with a Maple Leaf product for 42 years"
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(98)
 
(MyFox Twin Cities)
 
 
 
Cop investigated for feeding Pop Tarts to gorillas
source: myfoxtwincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(MTV)
 
 
 
Would you make a commitment like this? (Sponsored link)
source: hpdeclare.mtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(100)
 
(KRIS)
 
 
 
"Man Accused Of Having Sex With Underage Teen In Court." Next time, try a hotel room
source: kristv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(129)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
"Iraq will be a colony of Iran"
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(299)
 
(wcnc.com)
 
 
 
If you're going to give out educational items to teachers, make sure you spell the word "education" correctly
source: wcnc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
Toilet bowl cleaner, a fishing rod, a 25 lb bag of potting soil? Things you can buy at a Civil War battlefield...correct
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(153)
 
(Fosters.com)
 
 
 
Police nab parrot on the lam. That's gonna make for some funky offspring
source: fosters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(21)
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
♫ Ex-bouncer man ♫ Ex-bouncer man ♫ Ex-bouncer man hates DUI man ♫ They have a fight ♫ Ex-bouncer wins ♫ Ex-bouncer man ♫
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(135)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
As if being a poodle wasn't humiliating enough. Your poodle wants some dignity
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Canadian government takes measures to protect what's truly important: the bacon supply
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Theme: Earn your own entry on Snopes.com
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Apparently, President Obama is actually Animal Chin
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 
(Patriot Ledger)
 
 
 
If another motorist reports that you're driving erratically, mooning her will probably not help persuade the cops you're sober
source: patriotledger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(12)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
"When confronted during the interview, he fled - and stole two more boxes of beer as ran through the front door"
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
The Fark mascot has joined the fight club craze. With pictures that will leave you speechless
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(225)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Apple shaped women have higher risk for asthma. Pear shaped women say, LOL wut?
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(114)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Police in London solve 1 crime for every 1000 CCTV cameras. Or about 2 for every 1984
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(125)
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
As God is my witness, I thought those turkeys were high
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(Dayton Daily News)
 
 
 
Tip: When selling yourself for sexual favors, hire a babysitter (with "you'd hit it" pic)
source: daytondailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(361)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Protip: When preparing to commit robbery, it's a lot easier to buy a mask or stocking rather than spray painting your face, espaecially if they're toxic
source: greenvilleonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
One in seven Kiwi men fear their women who keep track of them "in a controlling or frightening way"
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(KSDK)
 
 
 
Missouri legislature approves ban on tupperware instead of styrofoam, gets an F in chemistry
source: ksdk.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(82)
 
(IndyStar)
 
 
 
Man goes fishing for catfish in Lafayette, Indiana, finds piranha instead
source: indystar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Feuding Alabamy family causes a riot of 150 people
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(The Morning Call)
 
 
 
Shoe tying. Serious business
source: mcall.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(CTV)
 
 
 
Vancouver police issue telephone dating warning
source: ctvbc.ctv.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(17)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
This man in Sydney makes $400 a day by: A)working in government, B)being a lawyer or C)begging
source: dailytelegraph.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(129)
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Worst... Comic book guys... EVER
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
The principal from "Saved by the Bell" releases karaoke album
source: marketwire.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Obama (Death) Panel warns that Swine Flu May Cause 90,000 US Deaths
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(220)
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Buying cold medicine will soon require an FBI background check and 6 month waiting period as new "Shake-N-Bake" Meth formula renders current anti-meth laws ineffective
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(320)
 


Mon August 24, 2009
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man shooting at dragonflies with his rifle accidentally shoots his friend in the head
source: gtowntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(99)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Teacher tackles suspect who detonated two pipe bombs, and had eight more and a chain saw, but no hall pass
source: abclocal.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(116)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Doctor who must have the biggest stethoscope in the entire hospital has sex with a patient in her room with her husband just outside the door. "'What a great buzz"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
If you're a veteran who recently received a letter stating that you have Lou Gehrig's disease, raise your hand. If you can do that, the letter was a mistake
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Chronic drunk costs San Francisco $150,000 a year. He's not homeless or broke; he just gets wasted and passes out every day. "'Doesn't cost me a thing,' he said cheerfully"
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(201)
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
3rd bee attack in Phoenix in five days. Police advise citizens to stay calm, and just hand over the pollen
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
Study says young men who contract STDs view it as an affirmation of their manhood
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(77)
 
(WCBS 880)
 
 
 
Prison officials say rumor of Bernie Madoff dying from cancer is just wishful thinking
source: wcbs880.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this emo trio
source: flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Los Angeles Fark Party Aug 29. LGT venue
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(87)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Jackson's death ruled homicide
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(375)
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
You are never too old to set another goal, or to dream a new dream, or to beat another man to death at the nursing home
source: baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(gmanews)
 
 
 
Getting drunk and sexually molesting and killing a 2yr old goat is no way to go through life son. Goat trifecta complete
source: gmanews.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Not news: Man goes to strip club on a Sunday night. Florida: While leaving two toddlers sitting in his parked car outside
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(Zug.com)