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Sun August 16, 2009
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Not news: Man rescues wounded animal and nurses it back to health. News: They become inseparable friends, playing together and frolicking in the water. Crikey: It's a crocodile
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(118)
 
(AOL)
 
 
 
Milwaukee mayor, coming to the aide of a screaming elderly woman and baby, fractures hand punching the attacker who was beating him with a metal pipe. Mayor's giant brass testicles unharmed
source: news.aol.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(462)
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
New Zealand has a strong entrant in this year's Dumb Criminal Olympics
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(What Does it Mean?)
 
 
 
Remember that guy in a standoff with the Feds in LA a few days ago? He was one of Israel's top bio-weapons experts monitoring CIA Swine Flu "operations" in LA. He even had genetic immunity to ward off all the CS powder
source: whatdoesitmean.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(184)
 
(McClatchy)
 
 
 
New York murder investigation includes voodoo, kinky sex, family crowbar fight, Amway convention, and a body sitting in limbo for a month in the morgue. All this can only mean one thing. The involved parties are Floridians
source: mcclatchydc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(Newslite)
 
 
 
After 10 years and millions of dollars, inventor perfects colored bubbles
source: newslite.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(115)
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
"Search still on for Arctic Sea" - Subby suggests they look at their map of the world - it's the blue bit at the top
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
Photoshop this kite-flying kid
source: spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(WWL)
 
 
 
Third named storm of the weekend.. tropical trifecta complete
source: wwl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(100)
 
(KMBC)
 
 
 
Two teens arrested for doing what many have dreamed but few have dared
source: kmbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(109)
 
(KLTV)
 
 
 
Texas schools now required to teach the Bible in class. And so it begins
source: kltv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(980)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
August 16th marks the passing of two of the greatest entertainers of all time: Babe Ruth and Elvis Presley
source: sportsillustrated.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Bill, bill, bill, magazine ad, bill, bill, greeting card from my cousin in Detroit, bill, bill, magazine ad
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(185)
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
In news that should surprise no one, consumers rarely see refunds from gas stations for price gouging
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
"Anyone who wants to get into a Vampire Gathering needs to see the gargoyles first. They're the protectors, the first line of defense against heckling street preachers and tourists."
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(176)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
"Dry conditions feed California wildfires" Really? You don't say?
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(Iowa City Press-Citizen)
 
 
 
A slideshow of twenty-odd Midwesterners dressed as their favorite Anime characters. Yes, not even Iowa is safe from the ridiculousness of idiotic adult cosplayers
source: press-citizen.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(178)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
After having the election stolen from him and thousands of his supporters arrested and beaten (or worse), Mousavi now thinks it would be a good time to start a new political party. This is not going to end well
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this mud slide
source: s.wsj.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(C|Net)
 
 
 
"How to use math to choose a wife"; is there anything (else) science can't do?
source: news.cnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(108)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
New research shows that kids who play video games with other kids in person are good kids. Those who do it only online, well, not so much
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(143)
 
(Telluride Watch)
 
 
 
"For me, it's kind of cool to walk home in Telluride after dark, extra alert to the possibility of stumbling across a black bear." Submitters idea of cool is stumbling across a bunch of drunken coeds, but thats just me
source: telluridewatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(The Times Record.com)
 
 
 
Some tried to make it happen, but there will be no Hogwarts Elementary School in Brunswick, Maine
source: timesrecord.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
How can one man hate parsnips so much?
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(124)
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
"Daniel is serving a sentence of 17-and-a-half years in prison, followed by supervised release for life. There's no evidence in the record that he ever succeeded in talking with a real underage girl"
source: wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(400)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Swine flu vaccine may kill more than the flu itself. This is not a repeat from 1976
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(82)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
N. Korea is increasingly becoming that crazy sobbing girl at the party whom everybody is growing weary of indulging
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Getting by on $300,000 in this economy is so hard that the majority of the US just decided not to do it, relish in their low paying jobs (Tag is for article)
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(326)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Angry patient bites off the end of a doctor's finger and runs off. Police are looking for tips
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
Drug dealer who makes $150 a week gets arrested. You're doing it wrong
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Are you insured for the contents of your blog and social-networking sites? "If you don't know something is factual and you're speaking about an entity or individual, then don't say it"
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(The Morning Call)
 
 
 
Grammar Nazis describe the words and phrases that chap their ASCII
source: mcall.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(271)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Here's a list of America's most overrated tourist attractions. Your mom's bedroom not included
source: travel.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(283)
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Give us your money and we'll ask God to give you more money
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(124)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Too soon?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Elven bridge building at its finest
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(Some Honorable Crook)
 
 
 
Sex offender busted by burglars: man jailed for possession of child pornography after offended burglars turn his laptop over to police
source: weinterrupt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(133)
 
(gazette)
 
 
 
Drunk guy blows a .41, tries to steal a squad car, gets picked up by his mommy after a "couple of beers"
source: gazettextra.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(tmj4)
 
 
 
You know you fail as a robber when you shoot your partner, then the victim shoots you
source: todaystmj4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 


Sat August 15, 2009
(Some Pink Underwear Wearer)
 
 
 
Sheriff Joe Arpaio busts into county building, seizes control of computer systems, change passwords. He "has no authority... to do this. He just decided ... to send in deputies and take over"
source: bizjournals.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(407)
 
(Maildumper)
 
 
 
Tired of lacing your shoes the same old way? Here is a graphic explaining 15 different ways to lace your shoes
source: maildumper.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(108)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: rubbing salt in an old wound
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(JSOnline)
 
 
 
There's a damn good reason you shouldn't attempt to cross an active drawbridge (with pucker-inducing photo)
source: jsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(173)
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Another Democrat wins the release of an American prisoner
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(300)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
The world's finest memories meet for the UK Open Memory Championships, displaying their ability to recall decks of cards, random numbers and that time five years ago when you stared at that waitress in the tight shirt
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 
(Examiner)
 
 
 
Newsy: Is doing tequila shots with Mickey Mouse a good idea?
source: examiner.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Why is a mother who abandoned her kid in the news? She's hot
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(236)
 
(Pensacola News Journal)
 
 
 
Pensacola celebrates 450th birthday, tells rest of nation to get off its lawn
source: pnj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(SanDiegoUnionTribune)
 
 
 
Man arrested for making online threats against schools. Duke sucks
source: www3.signonsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Too many people are using the parks, so the city bans group sports
source: ledgernews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(Detroit News)
 
 
 
That's what I love about these middle school boys, man. I get older, they stay the same age (with "Yeah, you'd hit it" pic)
source: detnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(145)
 
(SanDiegoUnionTribune)
 
 
 
Forget about swine flu. It's time to panic about the West Nile virus again
source: www3.signonsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(BDCwire)
 
 
 
During a ceremony featuring bare-chested women, fresh goat's blood and a tribal king, Jackson was bestowed with the ceremonial title of royal "dignitary"- Jesse, not Michael
source: wbbm780.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these practicing firemen
source: ww.dmna.state.ny.us   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 
(RUFKM.NET)
 
 
 
User gets banned from Craigslist for trying to sell Craig's list. With bonus photo of a donkey, for no apparent reason
source: rufkm.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Poet faces charges of child porn stemming from "the written word", presumably something about his longfellow
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(Dawn)
 
 
 
News: leader of al Qaeda-inspired militant group killed. Fark: by Hamas
source: dawn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(92)
 
(Record Online (NY))
 
 
 
Woodstock '69 state health-code inspector explains what happened after he confronted the bearded hippie in a chef's hat and loincloth who was cooking burgers for the multitudes
source: recordonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(Florida Today)
 
 
 
Dad tells daughter to turn off computer. Daughter curses out Dad. Dad throws pizza at daughter.. Daughter Calls cops. Dad goes down on a felony assult charge on his daughter
source: floridatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(177)
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Mutant polio virus spreads in Nigeria. EVERYBODY PANIC. Actually, this IS rather scary. SERIOUSLY, EVERYBODY PANIC
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(117)
 
(Iowa City Press-Citizen)
 
 
 
Police respond to a trespassing complaint, see a single marijuana seed on the ground. They enter the apartment, find a woman, two children, marijuana, weapons, and a bulletproof vest. Then things get weird
source: press-citizen.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(110)
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Old and busted:hipsters wearing girls clothing. New hotness:hipsters with potbellies
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(124)
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
American women getting better at birth control
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(103)
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Prices continue to fall as consumers continue to cut back on shopping. If this keeps up, soon everything will be free, right?
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(104)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
American pilot about to take off from Heathrow with more than double the legal alcohol level in his blood puts it down to drinking real beer, rather than the American pisswater he's used to
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(112)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Young, drunk and stupid is actually a pretty good way to go to the hospital
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(11)
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
Ana we're off to the start of the 2009 hurricane season
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(89)
 
(Jacksonville.com)
 
 
 
"Mrs. Jesus Christ" arrested for fraud, accused of trying to write a bad check for a car. Unknown if it was a Chrysler
source: jacksonville.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Owner reunited with his lost cat (his lost African Serval that weighs 50 pounds, can jump 15 feet and run 65mph) just in time for a Super-Sized Caturday
source: fox11online.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(411)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Woman with an astonishing chin cleft claims laser hair removal has given her a beard. Someone's doing something wrong
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(The Daily Urinal)
 
 
 
Not news: Man held in jail since Feb. 2008. News: For $200k fake concert promotion. Fark: Claims to be member of "Kool & the Gang." Bonus: He sings one of their songs in court to prove it
source: daily-journal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(16)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Wham!
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(75)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Would be robber beaned by grocer. Half baked alibi leaves him without a legume to stand on
source: www2.highlandstoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(21)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Woman arrested for trying to steal bacon from her employer. (with "Bacon Bandit" mugshot)
source: wpbf.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
If you are a counselor at a psychiatric home, dating the mental patients might not be the best idea
source: lohud.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(Some Guys)
 
 
 
Photoshop these U.S. Patent Office clerks
source: shorpy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(The Tennessean)
 
 
 
Scammers target law firms. Is professional courtesy dead?
source: tennessean.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Millions of women find sex unbearable. They can be identified by a ring on the fourth finger of the left hand
source: i.abcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(299)
 
(Discover)
 
 
 
Apparently, Buzz Aldrin has had enough
source: blogs.discovermagazine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(82)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Not news: Teacher actually cares enough to develop a lesson plan with visual aids. News: It was for Revolutionary War history and they were plastic guns. Fark: The school goes into lockdown, teacher suspended
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(122)
 
(Quad City Times)
 
 
 
After you've robbed a bank, run through a cornfield, changed your clothes, stopped sweating, run through the other side of the cornfield, make sure the car you flag down to orchestrate your escape isn't an undercover cop
source: qctimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(KOMU)
 
 
 
If you're looking for a motel to stay at due to car trouble, be sure to ask the clerk, "will my wife be able to go to the soda machine without running into a SWAT team?"
source: komu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
How many roads must a man walk down before the police ask to see some ID?
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(176)
 


Fri August 14, 2009
(Breitbart.com)
 
 
 
On second thought, national healthcare could kill off unions
source: bighollywood.breitbart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(462)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this person in pink at a park
source: s.wsj.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(Courthouse News)
 
 
 
Family suing Honda for $10 million for failing to prevent tornado from picking their Odyssey and shattering the windows while they were driving. No, really
source: courthousenews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(233)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
This week's TSG mugshot roundup starts off with a Ron Mexico wannabe, then it gets weird
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(237)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
34 pissed-off Egyptian fishermen with machetes vs. 8 Somali pirates with guns. Ready, FIGHT
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(147)
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Nothing is dividing the Christian community quite like the newest Harry Potter movie. "Over and over again Harry Potter is victorious and made a hero while he continuously breaks the rules and gets rewarded for that."
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(382)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Missing Maltese ship found off of the African coast. Quickly renamed "Event Horizon"
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(147)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Lockheed Martin's latest military vehicle: "These will exceed the specifications and I will tell you, very hard to tip over." Apparently, that doesn't apply to journalists taking it on a test drive
source: news10now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(154)
 
(ksat.com)
 
 
 
Man delicately attacked by two gentle, loving pit bulls
source: ksat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(387)
 
(Some Firefighter)
 
 
 
Not News: Fire department loans truck to neighboring city. Fark: Truck bursts into flames on the way to the city
source: www2.insidenova.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Australian coroner begins grim task of identifying PNG victims, but at least no data was lost in their compression
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man jumps in river to a) help a child b) catch a fish c) escape his wife's nagging
source: sthelenschat.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(103)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
With all of its other problems solved, Scottish government turns its attention to the most pressing social issue of our time: Hedge Rage
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(Breitbart.tv)
 
 
 
Lots of folks are AWs, but the lady who set herself on fire and then walked around at a mall is in a class by herself
source: breitbart.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(266)
 
(SF Examiner)
 
 
 
Moving truck slams into building, quickly becomes stationary
source: sfexaminer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Inside the busy mind of a baby. "Tits tits tits tits tits tits murder tits tits tits tits tits"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(154)
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Another month, another serial killer in North Carolina
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Lawyer famed for fighting frivolous class action lawsuits files frivolous class action lawsuit
source: law.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(YourTango)
 
 
 
A man is defined by the beer he drinks and the company he keeps but mostly the beer he drinks
source: yourtango.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(280)
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
If your religion forbids you to wear itsy bitsy teeny weeny yellow polka dot bikini, then you can always wear this bigsy wigsy sunny screeny crimson plain polyester burqini
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(189)
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
"Squeaky" Fromme released from prison, immediately signs with the Philadelphia Eagles
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(133)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Family thrilled about Kardashian pregnancy, Picard still screaming about four lights
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(221)
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
University adds grade worse than F, so that employers can separate the crappy students from the shiatty students
source: calgaryherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(190)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Snails wiping out oyster populations. Begun, the appetizer war has
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Because of the economy and budget cuts, how will the first day of school look different this year?
source: upload.wikimedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Friday Photo Fun XXIV: Match the arrestee with the corporate giant logo. Deadline is 4PM Eastern
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
Finally, the tough questions. President Obama, will you be my homeboy?
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(125)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Hillary Clinton: "The president considers himself a son of Africa." Birthers have a collective, crippling orgasm as they trample over one another to get Fox interviews
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(336)
 
(Hot Air)
 
 
 
You know who would want us all to have universal healthcare? Surprisingly, the answer this time is Jesus Christ, not Hitler
source: hotair.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(901)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
While planes and helicopters collide over the Hudson, the air traffic controller was chatting on the phone with his girlfriend while his supervisor had wandered off and wasn't even in the tower. Both will likely be fired
source: abclocal.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(164)
 
(Democrat & Chronicle)
 
 
 
Wal-Mart sees run on video games and electronics the same day "back to school" welfare program starts. Coincidence?
source: democratandchronicle.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(647)
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
Predator drones to be fitted with killer sound systems, sensurround subwoofers capable of melting internal organs with low-frequency renditions of "Ride of the Valkyries". I love the sound of hip-hop in the morning
source: wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(125)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
The first rule of Retard Fight Club is: MEEP DERP. The second rule of Retard Fight Club is: the maximum sentence is 10 years in prison
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(179)
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
If you know "Crazy Chris", the stabby hit-and-run driver, police would like a word with you
source: southflorida.sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 
(ksbw.com)
 
 
 
Actual headline: "Shark Attack On Porpoise Closes 2 Beaches." At least we know that the shark attack wasn't an accident
source: ksbw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(BDCwire)
 
 
 
Of course Joe Jackson attended the Gary Indiana tribute to Michael Jackson, he was paid to be there
source: wbbm780.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(Tampa Fark Party, August 15th)
 
 
 
Only 1 day left to make plans for the Tampa Fark party . D.I.T
source: img.photobucket.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(78)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
British boy earns qualification in successfully using a bus. He's obviously going to go far in life
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Give a man a fish and he'll eat for a day, teach him to fish and he'll break into the Natural History Museum and steal their tropical bird collection
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(Yukon News)
 
 
 
A flow-chart for every argument you've ever had with your girlfriend
source: maxim.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(599)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Fish falls from the sky and smashes a woman's windshield. At least that's what I've been herring
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
If you can think of a better way to raise money for charity than a 21-mile topless swim, feel free to share
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Clayton Bigsby joins Facebook, gets in trouble
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(116)
 
(Scoop.co.nz)
 
 
 
Yes. Yes. Au G-g-g-god Yes
source: wellington.scoop.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(azfamily.coom)
 
 
 
Grocery store owner accused of telling a customer his lottery ticket wasn't a winner and trying to cash in on the $10,000 prize herself (w/ "Nic Cage-worthy haircut" mugshot)
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
C) Stab him in the ass
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
City official wants to impose a $118 fine for swearing at police or firefighters. That's some fine farking police work there, Lou
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Cop who rear-ended a "drunk" woman who "cut into his lane" very unlucky; has 8 crashes in 11 years. Incidents include other rear-end collisions with drunks, and the time a metal pole high on cocaine stepped in front of him
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(204)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Performance artist delivers fake crack while wearing a white tuxedo and dolphin headpiece. "It's just candy. Unfortunately, being criminally stupid is not illegal." (with pics)
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this shopping couple
source: onlinestuff4u.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
The British embassy will not help if you are not satisfied with your boob job
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(WWL)
 
 
 
Brad Pitt on whether he will run for Mayor of New Orleans: "I'm running on the gay marriage, no religion, legalization and taxation of marijuana platform... I have no chance"
source: wwl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(158)
 
(The Tennessean)
 
 
 
Man pays $17,700 for permit in first Tennessee elk hunt in 150 years, gives it to his wife as a gift
source: tennessean.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(115)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
What do bull testicles, horse tails, olives, eggs, blow-up sex dolls and cucumbers have in common?
source: brisbanetimes.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
One old man, four perps, one shotgun, two shots...several million delighted taxpayers
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(827)
 


Thu August 13, 2009
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
After four years of research, fish experts conclude that female fish have different preferences in potential mates and their tastes change quite often
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Finally a reason to go visit Grandma at the home
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(82)
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
The 3-Point Seatbelt celebrates 50 years of wrinkling your clothes
source: wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(138)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Doctor makes an "America Dies on Dunkin'" sign, gets applause and laughter from the local community. Just kidding, he was forced to resign
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(172)
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this flighty bird
source: flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(KRQE Albuquerque)
 
 
 
Man accused of "humping" car in grocery store parking lot
source: krqe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 
(Time)
 
 
 
When you call the Chief Justice in a last minute appeal for a stay of execution, the last thing you want to hear is, "We close at 5"
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(189)
 
(Kansas.com)
 
 
 
Anti-porn activists in Kansas want to force adult shops to close between midnight and 6 a.m
source: kansas.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(205)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
San Dimas residents discover a bear in their swimming pool. Most excellent
source: nbcmiami.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Remember: freedom of speech does not cover going to a town-hall meeting on health-care reform and holding up signs with death threats to the President and his wife. "Death to Michelle and her two stupid kids"
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(560)
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
New Zealand Breast Cancer Foundation has declined a pledge of $7500 from a group because the money will be raised from a Boobs on Bikes parade and well, they don't want boobs to be associated with breast cancer
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(105)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Kids Google the darndest things
source: onlinefamilyinfo.norton.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(269)
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Stephen Harper, consistently embarrassing Canadians since 2006
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(161)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Gay couple shocked, SHOCKED that a Utah newspaper won't publish their wedding announcement. It's like the state's run by some weird religion or something
source: comcast.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(119)
 
(BDCwire)
 
 
 
These two women would be Thelma and Louise if Thelma was 78 and Louise was 67
source: wbbm780.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(12)
 
(ktvb.com)
 
 
 
Charter school to teach several versions of creationism. Still no word if being hacked up by the Great God Obbadiah Smith the Oatmeal Master is one of them
source: ktvb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(Fox News)
 
NewsFlash
 
Standoff between red VW Bug and Police in Westwood, California. Suspect is wanted by Secret Service. LGT Live Feed
source: interactive.foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(2359)
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
"Angry Guy" ejected from health care town hall meeting has been collecting disability checks from the government for more than four years
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(476)
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Man to apologise in 2019 to cops for his behavior during his arrest. This will be a repeat from 2009
source: southflorida.sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(15)
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Judge rules its ok to back up DVDs for personal use provided you don't own the illegal software to do that.. wait what?
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(173)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Residue of World War I WMD found in DC. EVERYBODY FEEL A SMALL TINGE OF PANIC
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
It's not exactly the Zapruder film, but the Cubs and Chicago PD hope to use it to discover the identity of the "real beer chucker"
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(162)
 
(Wisconsin State Journal)
 
 
 
Step 1: Force all DMV employees to take a furlough on the same day. Step 2: Give those same employees overtime pay to catch up on the backlog created by the furlough. Step 3: Profit? Asinine tag gets stuck waiting for #92384 to be called
source: madison.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(99)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
$140 million in federal stimulus spent to give each welfare parent $200 per kid. Bonus: "It's free money" and "Thank god for Obama. He's always looking out for us"
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(994)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Days after being named Forbes' "Green Company of the Year," Exxon pleads guilty to killing a bunch of endangered birds with hazardous chemicals
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(107)
 
(InternetNews.com)
 
 
 
The most popular language used by open source developers is.....C Well only if you count by line. No wait, it's JavaScript if you count stuff that projects kinda/sorta use. And hey if you use only one language it's likely Perl
source: internetnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(314)
 
(Some Enraged Bovine)
 
 
 
Thought the NY Times story of dangerous cows from a couple weeks ago was far-fetched? Behold the rampaging cow from the Kalamazoo fair. Now with video goodness
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Cop: "I pulled you over for talking on the phone." Woman: "I can prove I wasn't." Cop: "I mean I pulled you over for speeding." Woman: "Can I see the radar?" *ZZZAP* (w/ taserific vid)
source: syracuse.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(830)
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
Judge releases man who had been jailed for contempt of court for yawning. If only there was some sort of gesture to sum up how anticlimactic the ending to this story is
source: chicagobreakingnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Pittsburgh is dressing up vacant downtown storefronts ahead of the G-20 summit, presumably to make them more attractive targets for brick throwing anarchists
source: post-gazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
It's mid-summer, time to start reporting on *checks calendar* fires in California
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Like anyone who spends much time hanging out in the Caribbean, Atlantic Hurricanes at 1,000-year high
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(148)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Penguin suddenly goes bald, gets new wetsuit
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Fark desktop wallpaper
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Thousands of Europeans who are bad at math are flying to Italy to play its lotto, hoping to win the 186 Million jackpot
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(The Big Money)
 
 
 
That unemployed woman suing her college might be justified after all. "If CNN can't tell the difference, it's not a surprise that young entering students can't, either"
source: thebigmoney.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(137)
 
(BDCwire)
 
 
 
Former Clinton aide, model for the wacky Kathy Bates character in Primary Colors, charged with trying to smuggle contraband into prison
source: wbbm780.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Britain frees "Great Train Robber" Ronnie Biggs after several years in prison, three decades on the run and a mediocre Phil Collins movie
source: thelede.blogs.nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
For most people rain delays are a real pain. For the kids of Camp Sundown, it was a chance to get to watch an entire Yankee game from start to finish. Because they cannot be exposed to sunlight. Bonus: Yanks played 3AM wiffle ball with them
source: sports.espn.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(132)
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
News: Yale University Press to publish "definitive" book on conversial Danish cartoons of Mohammad. Fark: The book will not actually reprint the cartoons
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(88)
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Brothers use pressure washer to clean giant bee hive. Hilarity ensues
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Teen finds wallet with $2000 at mall. Mom of teen finds wallet with $1000 in it and mails it back to the owner. The owner is happy to have their $100 back
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(129)
 
(EFF)
 
 
 
The Burning Man Terms and Conditions have changed for the worse. In other news, Burning Man has a Terms and Conditions
source: eff.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(181)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Heart transplant patients push "physical limits" at Ironman Triathlon. Next push expected to be "up daisies"
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
News: Bus driver placed on leave after a photo of her using her phone while on duty surfaced. FARK: She was using her phone to call headquarters because her work issued radio didn't work
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Winnie the Pooh, Winnie the Pooh, give me all your money or I'll pop a cap
source: momlogic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(Wonkette)
 
 
 
TSA announces new plans that ensure you won't blow-up a plane
source: wonkette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(124)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
When it comes to the case of 18 month old Frances Hunter....Mr Edwards you ARE the father
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(130)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
The upside of spending five days in a ditch is not remembering spending five days in a ditch
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(MTV)
 
 
 
I will move out of my parents' basement....in the next year. (Sponsored link)
source: hpdeclare.mtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(AFP)
 
 
 
Right-wing militias on the rise. As opposed to left-wing militias, who would totally horde guns and shiat if they weren't so f*cking baked right now
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(348)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Turns out the question Hillary went off about the other day was mistranslated -- the student meant to ask what Obama thought, not Bill Clinton
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(157)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Thousands expected at Shriver wake. So she was just sleeping?
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
Residents near park propose controversial new softball rules, like "pee inside" and "wear clothes"
source: edmontonjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
After going out on a limb, woman with prosthesis wins her employment tribunal, four-digit figure judgement against Abercrombie and Fitch, who claim their comments were just 'armless fun
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Welcome to Providence, where hookers are legal, the strippers are 16, and the Mayor is in jail
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man hits and kills a cyclist and doesn't stop. Tries to get rid of the car in the cash for clunkers program claiming the damage was caused when he hit a javelina
source: abc15.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Apparently it needs to be said again: if you're picked up for DUI, sleep it off before you go driving again
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Those snowflakes accused of running down and beating a young moose may have an alibi. They were vandalizing a church at the time of the incident, so stop besmirching their names, or they'll beat you with sticks
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Slashing tires and breast-feeding your kid while drunk is no way to go through life, girl
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
Protip: Don't give your ID to the teller before robbing the bank
source: baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(Danbury NewsTimes)
 
 
 
When breaking into a house, do you a) steal the TV, b) take some jewelry, or c) trim your pubic hair and leave it for the homeowner?
source: newstimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
You know the economy is bad when you have to pull a grab-and-go at a yard sale
source: thebaynet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Y'know when you pull up to a parking garage ticket machine, and you can't reach, so you open the door and lean wayyyy out? Yeah, don't do that
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(180)
 
(The Frisky)
 
 
 
Some adults are worried that the latest trend in bar-mitzvah presents totally sucks
source: thefrisky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(125)
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Your mother has just thrown out your collection of anime figures. Do you C) burn down her house?
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(321)
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
The New York Times asks whether the Federal Reserve, which did such a stellar job with the likes of Madoff and AIG and probably burns every bag of popcorn it tries to make, can protect consumers
source: economix.blogs.nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(113)
 
(Hartford Courant)
 
 
 
Connecticut looking to institute 41-strikes-and-you're-out law
source: courant.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Principal goes missing while her school goes into lockdown because of a report of a father with a gun. Lockdown resolved when principal finally calls in to let school know she was shacked up with said father in a hotel room
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(207)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Protip: Car dealers will not accept nude pics of your 11-year-old sister in exchange for a car
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(95)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man throws rocks at five people and tells them he was preparing for the Ultimate Fighting Championship and "he needed to practice getting knocked out so he could prepare."
source: kitsapsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
If you're 6' 7", weigh 250 pounds, you're going to stand out when you ring people's doorbells in the nude
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this "eat well" poster
source: food.gov.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(WLBZ2.com)
 
 
 
Police aren't sure if the two cases of bikers being hit with blow darts in Delaware within a week of each other are related
source: wlbz2.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Another sign that some people just have too much time on their hands: a surge in the popularity of doggy playdates
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Terrorist convicted of Lockerbie airline bombing to be released, hopefully in midair
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
This story has it all. Steamed corn, kidney transplants & Nancy Pelosi. Get your rage on
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(97)
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
New principal to former principal: "you mishandled school funds." Former principal to new principal: "Oh yeah? You run an online escort service." New principal: "Uhhh...I'm gonna resign now, later."
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(82)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Abdandoned subway stations of the world
source: infrastructurist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(142)
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Christian faith-healing clinic opens, uses "aggressive" prayer techniques to cure cancer, broken bones and mental illness
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(474)
 
(Stars and Stripes)
 
 
 
Kansas lawmakers prepare to fight against Gitmo detainees transferring to Fort Leavenworth because military maximum-security prison surrounded by 5000 Army troops can't deal with "dangerous terrorists."
source: stripes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(154)
 
(Sound and Motion)
 
 
 
If you're a biker with a rap sheet wanting to change your name to avoid police detection, pretty please, use something other than "Tony Soprano"
source: livenews.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(11)
 
(Some DNA strand)
 
 
 
Parents freak out over sculpture of a strand of DNA on UC Berkeley campus. "It's vile and offensive, and kids have no business seeing what God thought fit to hide from our eyes."
source: stateofprotest.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(252)
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
In a sign of the times, Detroit police dust off a 1963 squad car and hit the streets. (Warning: slide show)
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(News 1130)
 
 
 
Vancouver PD warns that UFC is popular with gang members, as well as cinema, hockey and breathing
source: news1130.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(3 News New Zealand)
 
 
 
If you ever find yourself cycling down a Louisiana street with drug paraphernalia in your bag and an alligator on your shoulders, perhaps you should rethink your path in life
source: 3news.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 223: "Do It Yourself". Details and rules in the first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 


Wed August 12, 2009
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Ballsy squirrel crashes couple's holiday photo in Canada. Damn Canadian squirrels, ruining all our phot ... AWWWWWW
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(119)
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Britain calls for ban on all immigrants who don't speak English, ignoring the fact that the British can't
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(141)
 
(The Register Citizen)
 
 
 
French fries. Oil fire. Garden hose. This is not going to end up well
source: registercitizen.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(Science Daily)
 
 
 
Man who organized Prop 8 to protect the "sanctity" of marriage is divorcing his wife of 43 years
source: sdcitybeat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(239)
 
(officer.com)
 
 
 
California woman allegedly assaults man with horse. The horse said it was all the woman's idea
source: officer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these smoking hot hands
source: zocalopublicsquare.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Alberto Gonzalez finally recalls something enough to regret it
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(138)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Medical officials warn: Meth can cause serious health conditions. Fark: and contribute to bad hair decisions
source: fox5sandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(149)
 
(Sky News)
 
 
 
Rabbis fight swine flu by using a plane to dust Israel with airborne prayers
source: news.sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Drunk woman helpfully makes herself available for arrest by crashing into patrol car
source: naplesnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Police note that the car was vandalized with chocolate and vanilla with sugar icing in a blue and orange color scheme, very moist and fresh to the touch, and that the vehicle was previously assaulted with Twinkies. Welcome to Pennsylvania
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Travel agents are becoming popular and people are turning away from internet booking. Oh yeah sure, uh-huh
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
The Swallows may return to Capistrano, but they can't beat the Grackles' return to Missouri
source: mexicoledger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Prescription painkiller pill popping police Chief pops cop cruiser into parked car, flees to Florida
source: wptz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
Americans pay the most for cell phone service, more than $50 a month. In countries like Holland and Sweden, it's practically free
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(283)
 
(Seacoastonline.com)
 
 
 
Cops arrest pot dealer for ripping off customer
source: seacoastonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(Some Real Estate Blog)
 
 
 
World's coolest bedroom has a bed that looks like a Y-Wing. As you might expect, it's in the basement
source: lovelylisting.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(294)
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
"Adopt A Pet" TV segment goes horribly wrong
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(217)
 
(MinnPost)
 
 
 
We lie a lot. And that's the truth
source: minnpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(102)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man finds rock sitting next to hole. Takes obvious next step of having it tested to see if it's a meteorite
source: khq.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(95)
 
(National Post)
 
 
 
"Detroit is a city that has been going through an incredible renaissance. We have wonderful history, great architecture and fabulous ethnic restaurants. We also have 37% less crime than the national average"
source: nationalpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(243)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Pro tip: Don't challenge the Dartmouth MA police with nothing but vodka and orange juice
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
P- P- P- Police make arrest in d- d- daring London jewelry rob- b- b- robbery
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(The Goods)
 
 
 
Abe Lincoln and a big purple dildo. Never thought those would go together (some nsfw language) (sponsored link)
source: livehardsellhard.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
The sign said not to feed the bears, but it didn't say anything about beating a moose with a stick
source: canada.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(153)
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Sacramento to build city-within-a-city, providing developers can clean up a centuries worth of railroad-related toxins
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(115)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Woman repeatedly bitten by otters. Eric Stratton, rush chairman, would be damned glad to meet her
source: apnews.myway.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(107)
 
(WCBStv.com)
 
 
 
If you had today as the day the first wrongful death swine flu lawsuit would be filed, step up and collect your prize. And cover your mouth when you cough
source: wcbstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(87)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Scientists reveal ideal animal, based on survey: Rabbit ears, face of a cat, body of a golden retriever and tail of a horse. Still no cure for cancer (with WTF pic)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(253)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
Pirates spotted in English Channel. This is not a repeat from 1651
source: business.timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(110)
 
(some sneaky Hobbes)
 
 
 
"The woman said she saw a tiger laying in her front lawn with two small deer standing next to it - something that immediately aroused skepticism"
source: dailytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(Toronto Sun)
 
 
 
"Dear Mr. Editor: I would like to inform you Scarlett Johansson actually is a clone ... created illegally by using stolen biological material." Is not the right way to start a Letter to the Editor
source: torontosun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(103)
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
Swedish hunters report seeing massive elk explosion. Mind you, elk explosions Kan be pretty messi
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
I have no idea what you're talking about, so here's a picture of a duck wearing shoes
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 
(Foobies)
 
 
 
Poisoned arugula pulled off supermarket shelves; Secret Service goes on high alert
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(87)
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Laundromat worker frightened by giant trouser snake. No, this is not the plot of the latest Jenna Jameson flick
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
"I realise now that my cheating on Choose Your Own Adventure books was the precursor to my shameful, much struggled with tendency these days to take a quick peek at the end of a book if I can't bear the suspense any longer"
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(126)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this perfect storm of turbulent gases
source: spacetelescope.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(Jacksonville.com)
 
 
 
Park officials repeatedly warn guy about letting his Dalmation drink from alligator-infested lake. You know what happened next. Now he's mad: "Why do we have alligators in a public lake?"
source: jacksonville.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(409)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
...on the other hand, if a judge tells you he's about to let the air out of your car tires, you should probably believe him
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(justnews.com)
 
 
 
Scorpion hitches a ride to Miami International Airport, gets in an ugly fight with Sub-Zero in the parking lot
source: justnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
Man's job interview does not go as planned after he admits to possession of child pornography and having sex with an underage girl. Bonus: interview was with the police
source: blog.al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(160)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Last week, Indonesian police struck a valiant blow against terrorism by shooting dead notorious Islamic militant Noordin Mohammad Top. Except that they shot the wrong guy. Oops
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
ASPIRIN. Apply directly to colon
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(MetroWest Daily News)
 
 
 
Special Olympians around the world express heartfelt "Faaaannn gyuuuuu" to Eunice Kennedy Shriver
source: metrowestdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(251)
 
(awkwardfamilyphotos .com)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Wearing a corsage to go with your prom dress. New hotness: Holding a chicken
source: awkwardfamilyphotos.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Sometimes, you might find a penny or a dime on the sidewalk. These people found a 60-pound bag of cocaine worth $1 million
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(152)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
British government to ban spice. Yeah, we'll just see what Muad'Dib has to say about that
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(159)
 
(Some Nut Muncher)
 
 
 
Caption this bashful squirrel
source: i86.photobucket.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(Some Tulsaunian)
 
 
 
Not News: Oklahoma mayoral candidate pushing for new zoo exhibit. News: Exhibit would depict the story of Genesis as the origin of animals. Fark: She's winning
source: newson6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(609)
 
(Billings Gazette)
 
 
 
Police chief: Our cops who tased a 76-year-old man driving an antique tractor during a parade "probably didn't do things the best way"
source: billingsgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(144)
 
(BDCwire)
 
 
 
If you're charged with robbing a bank, telling the cops "I'm an idiot", is not going to be a good legal strategy
source: wbbm780.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(12)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Cops Baffled by $10,000 worth of Cucumber Thefts. Subby suggests looking for known female criminals with smiles on their faces
source: news.ninemsn.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Censored
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Man killed by shard of glass after hurling his girlfriend through a store window. Ain't karma a biatch??
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(99)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
British drivers scared by Children of the Corn-like mannequins. You'd better believe there are pics
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(95)
 
(Albany Times Union)
 
 
 
Married couple, ages 58 and 71, walk into NY Capitol with a pot plant to protest drug laws. FARK worthy quote 'We're on a mission from God -- like the Blues Brothers"
source: timesunion.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(Rome News-Tribune)
 
 
 
"There can be only one...OWWWW"
source: rn-t.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 


Tue August 11, 2009
(Bernama)
 
 
 
Doctor claims homosexual activities and masturbation increase risk of getting swine flu. You know how I know you're gay?
source: bernama.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(193)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Schoolgirl nicknamed the "hunchback of Notre Dame" has surgery to correct her back problems. Something about this story really rings a bell
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(125)
 
(Fox 5 San Diego)
 
 
 
Angry biker decides to teach an RV driver a lesson by pulling in front and jamming on the brakes
source: fox5sandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(348)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
If slamming down some energy drinks gives you a good buzz, think what they'll do for the bees
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Precious snowflakes having "quarter-life crises" upon encountering what the rest of us call "the real world"
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(464)
 
(KENS5)
 
 
 
Today's assault with a deadly weapon winner is ...... (spins wheel)...... Deer Antlers - Austin, Texas. C'mon up and claim your prize, Austin
source: kens5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Tacoma News Tribune)
 
 
 
Psychic offers to cleanse money of evil spirits, instead cleans out seven families to the tune of $140,000
source: blogs.thenewstribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
"So, what are you in for?" "Tomatoes."
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop Theme: Reality shows that would appeal to your grandparents
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(78)
 
(Mercury News)
 
 
 
Let's try this again: When the guy in the Wal-Mart parking lot offers you a brand-new 37-inch Sony flat screen television for $100, it's an oven door
source: mercurynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(134)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Host of a TV crime show may have ordered killings to boost ratings. Kate Gosselin seen taking notes
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
In an effort to foster a calm and reasoned debate, protester straps gun to his leg outside townhall where Obama is scheduled to appear EVERYBODY PANIC
source: firstread.msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(1030)
 
(Examiner)
 
 
 
Chavez gets PWNd by Colombia's President Alvaro Uribe
source: examiner.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(351)
 
(Tampa Fark party)
 
 
 
This Saturday, August 15th is the Tampa Fark party. D.I.T
source: img.photobucket.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(98)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Pig steals woman's diamond ring off her hand. Farmer reassures her that this too shall pass
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(Some Pervvy Wanker)
 
 
 
Idiot calls her boss a "pervvy wanker", on Facebook, after adding him
source: geekologie.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(242)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Your flip-flops harbor deadly bacteria that could kill you. EVERYBODY PANIC AND RUN AWAY COMICALLY FLIP-FLOPPING
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(225)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Full text of House Health Care Bill because Chuck Norris isn't afraid of anything except the description of grant funding for states to offer voluntary home visits for parents on page 838
source: big.assets.huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(719)
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
Continental asked to explain why passengers were stranded on a plane for six hours in Rochester, MN. Since their answer won't be 'because we're farking incompentent, that's why', we can assume they will lie
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(197)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
40 million pounds of jewelry stolen. How the hell did they carry it all?
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Crystal ball sets woman's home on fire. She really should have seen that coming (pic)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(88)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Somail pirates learning new tricks from ticketmaster
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
Just like Superman, a guy comes to the rescue of a woman being robbed. Unlike Superman, he got shot in the nuts for his troubles
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Chevy Volt to get 230mpg in much the same way that your mom can say she's 'lost weight' and Obama can say 45 million are uninsured: by fudging the numbers
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(354)
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
Utah's NBC affiliate refuses to air network's new prime-time poker game show, on grounds of morality. Rest of the world disapproves of NBC programming on grounds of unwatchability
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(117)
 
(MTV)
 
 
 
Actual headline: "Miley Cyrus pole dances, praises trailers at Teen Choice Awards"
source: newsroom.mtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(178)
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
Not news: man has yard sale. Also not news: neighbor comes over to look. Fark: and finds $25K worth of stuff he burgled from her last week
source: wbaltv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Pixar director promises to smash his face into a cake when he reaches 5,000 followers on twitter, keeps promise
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Connection to Cholos gang investigated in slayings, after chewy caramel residue was found with traces of milk chocolate
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(WSBT)
 
 
 
If you're the bozo chasing cars at 3 in the morning, the kops would like a word with you
source: wsbt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
♬ Chewing out an image on my wacom ♩ The Corpse is out and I want some ♩ It's not hard, not far to reach, we can clone an image of Farkaway Beach ♩ Fark Fark Farkaway Beach ♬
source: corpse.elchode.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(217)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Lady interprets the voices in her head as the Mona Lisa requesting a cup of tea, and obliges her
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
DC Metro employees are so high on drugs they can't count to ten
source: washingtonexaminer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(200)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
"A paramedic who allegedly had oral sex in a hospital car park while on duty insisted he was only trying to comfort a sobbing woman"
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(170)
 
(Townhall)
 
 
 
Chuck Norris vs. The fine print of Obamacare. Round 1
source: townhall.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(735)
 
(Comedy Central)
 
 
 
Obama just wants to deny people the access to private for-profit death panels
source: thedailyshow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
People are starting to wonder about the security of Britain's food supply. Yeah, as if anyone is likely to want to steal that
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(KFDM.com)
 
 
 
Giant Brass Balls Award goes to the guy who sues Wal-Mart for $100,000 over a dislocated shoulder that he received after he was caught shoplifting
source: kfdm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(160)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Chuck E. Cheese, where a kid can shoot some biatches
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(88)
 
(Foobies)
 
 
 
This probably isn't what he meant when he said he wanted to get totally blitzed at a German castle
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(102.7 WEBN Cincinnati OH)
 
 
 
Girls love vampires, as long as they're just hooking up with underage girls & not scary or drinking blood or anything
source: webn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(380)
 
(New Scientist)
 
 
 
Always insult someone when they're laying down. They take it better, and you get a head start if they get up to slug you, according to scientists who have nothing better to study
source: newscientist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Police find a bride still in her wedding dress passed out next to a crate of vodka in a locked car. Still missing are both the car keys and her new husband
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
Man finishes building all by himself a boat that's 52 feet long, 22 feet tall and weighs 40 tons. It's so big he can't get it out of the warehouse he built it in
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(168)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Number 2 that was dropped trying for Number 1 may have been a waste. Other Number 2's raising stink that Number 1 was uninterrupted. Number 1's status described as fluid
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Swine flu vaccine trials start today. If you see a little blonde girl setting fires with her mind, get out of there
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
Old advice: never look a gift horse in the mouth. New advice: never punch a police horse in the mouth
source: chicagobreakingnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(The Superficial)
 
 
 
Whoever airbrushed Kelly Clarkson on the cover of this magazine deserves some kind of award
source: thesuperficial.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(371)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Wife of Twitter CEO tweets while giving birth: "OK, baby is coming out"
source: capitalradio.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(Mercury News)
 
 
 
sʞɔns sıɥʇ ןןǝʍ
source: mercurynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(Cincinnati Enquirer)
 
 
 
Judge wants to see the convicted be punished by getting paddled in the middle of town square. "I'm looking at options"
source: news.cincinnati.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
We put you through / A flim-flam trial / Now you're obliged / To stay a while - Burma Slave
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Sky News)
 
 
 
Israel swamped by mermaid sightings: "Many people are telling us they are sure they've seen a mermaid and they are all independent of each other. People say it is half girl, half fish, jumping like a dolphin"
source: news.sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(181)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Poll finds 143% of New Jersey voters think political corruption is a big issue
source: politickernj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(Boston Herald)
 
 
 
Massachusetts toll transponder system doesn't work right if cars follow too closely through tolls. Good thing Boston doesn't have heavy traffic or tailgaters
source: bostonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(WCBS 880)
 
 
 
President John F. Kennedy's sister Eunice Kennedy Shriver, a champion for the rights of the mentally disabled and founder of the Special Olympics, has died. She was 88
source: wcbs880.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(169)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
And todays winner for Made for Fark Headline is brought to you by Fox News: "Mom accused of Cutting Off Son's Genitals blames dog"
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
For some reason, American companies are getting more productive despite the fact that you and Bob are the only two guys left doing any work. And Bob sucks
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(299)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Man destroys house with flaming bobcat. Would not buy again
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
British supermarket launches extra-large condoms just in case submitter decides to visit their country, leaving his wife, Morgan Fairchild, at home
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(120)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Harvard University licenses a "slim-cut preppy clothing line" that looks like a trust fund threw up a partially masticated J. Crew catalogue
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(98)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Predictive text keypads cause kids to become fast, error-prone and impulsive, as compared with rotary-dial kids, who were slow, loud and really, really annoying
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(Lancashire Evening Post)
 
 
 
There is a blue bin for plastics, cans and glass, which includes a black inner pod for paper. There are also green and brown wheelie bins, plus a green box for cardboard and a red bag for textiles
source: lep.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this touchy tooth
source: s.wsj.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Yawhgih no drawkcab gnivird nam tserra eciloP
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
When going car shopping, it's generally not a good idea to buy a used car from someone whose 'lot' is in a strip mall's parking lot
source: bakersfieldnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Burglar armed with Buzz Lightyear toy gun meets victim with sawn-off shotgun. It's no toy story
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Some Lawn Guy)
 
 
 
Today's tale of a 25-year old thief hogtied by a 69-year old man brought to you by La Crosse, Washington (Bonus: left him in the middle of Main Street)
source: kxly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"Neighbors said they suspected B's Barber Shop, because customers often came and went without a haircut."
source: 970wfla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Teen runs away from Ohio to Orlando to live with pastor, claims father planning to kill her for converting from Islam to Christianity. Wasn't this script on Law and Order last year?
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(197)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Who knew handjobs could be worth $1,200 a day?
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
Shark tires of American fast food, orders out for paella
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(eBay)
 
 
 
For sale: 1990 Mercedes. 54,000 miles, runs well, owner is Christ's grandson
source: cgi.ebay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(139)
 


Mon August 10, 2009
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Only in Philly: Man snatches the purse of a 3-year-old girl
source: myfoxphilly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(88)
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Hillary Clinton: "I'm secretary of state, not Bill." hisssss
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(268)
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Portland's knitting community sets world record for simultaneous knitting at "Sock Summit 2009"
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Healthcare debate not contentious enough for you? Better get ready then, Obama is promising an immigration reform bill this year as well
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(281)
 
(Some pachyderm)
 
 
 
I don't know what's going on here but it involves an elephant trapped in a hole for some reason
source: ekstrabladet.dk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Everyone run for your lives. Ladybugs
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Dropping Aryan Nation literature in front lawns? That's a litter ticketin'
source: khq.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(127)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"Not that it's any excuse, but we honestly didn't know it was a crime -- if we did we wouldn't have uploaded it to the Internet"
source: edmontonsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(122)
 
(Houston Press)
 
 
 
Judge tells woman she couldn't have been raped, because she was "on top"
source: blogs.houstonpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(152)
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Police confirm gun dropped at Democratic town hall meeting. Truly begun the healthcare wars have
source: tpmdc.talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(508)
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Some goofy guy arrested for grabbing Minnie Mouse's big thunder mountains at Disney World. The Aristocats
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this homeless Tokyo man (Yes, he was really wearing that shirt)
source: i198.photobucket.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(Nerve)
 
 
 
Advice to women: "Do not make guys more complicated than we really are." Also, don't look in the folder labeled 'grandpa's birthday photos.' It's not what you think
source: blogs.nerve.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(383)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
If you can tell the difference between heart medication and sleeping tablets then you're already more qualified than this Australian pharmacist
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Today's probably inappropriate headline, "We're #1 . . . in attacks on the homeless"
source: blogs.orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(142)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
You know a bachelor party is good when 25 cops from 4 different agencies stop by
source: khq.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Caterpillar sex party wards off predators
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(BDCwire)
 
 
 
Pittsburgh gym killer had been stopped by police a week before his rampage
source: wbbm780.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(officer.com)
 
 
 
Man pulled over and charged with two theft charges, one count of driving with a suspended license and one count of animal cruelty......for the wet hamster in his glove box
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(30)
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
The first rule of Cripple Fight Club is you don't talk about Cripple Fight Club to the District Attorney
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(60)
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
A 3D Exploration of Picasso's Guernica for some reason
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(95)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Strap on the wading boots and break out the sandbags. Two major earthquakes recorded in Tokyo and the Indian Ocean
source: earthquake.usgs.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(194)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Sucks to be a miniature horse but born a dwarf too? With his luck, he'll end up the smallest bottle of school glue ever made (with Awwww pics)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(133)
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
"I don't want to sound un-Christian, but that's just dumb."
source: blogs.tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(200)
 
(KSTU FOX 13)
 
 
 
Hey, I have an idea. Let's give a bunch of loaded rifles to a busload of blind kids
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(84)
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Let's play Identify the Former Bush Official: "What kind of syllabus have you put together?" "You mean what am I going to be teaching?"
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(156)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
British resort bans skintight Speedos, offers complimentary waxings to all male guests so they don't gross other bathers out
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(248)
 
(Drew)
 
 
 
Running from Tobagos, land speed in hectares per hogshead and a whole new breed of enamel: Headlines of the Week 8/2 to 8/8
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Fulbright scholar and international journalist gets her big literary break writing about poo
source: cityroom.blogs.nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Slideshow of presidents and first ladies in swimsuits
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(139)
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
"And while Anderson was in the Niceville police holding cell, she was overheard telling one of her passengers that she "had cocaine" in her "coochy.""
source: blogs.tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(114)
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Farker James Lileks finds four baby bunnies in his backyard, asks you to name the fourth. They're: Flopsy, Mopsy, Dropsy and...? Spork? Gary? Sir Fluffy McAdorable?
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(443)
 
(Florida Today)
 
 
 
Man pretends to be mentally disabled adult, dupes woman into caring for him and changing his diapers. Guess he was trying to fit in with the neighbors
source: floridatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(116)
 
(CTV)
 
 
 
US Military monitors Twitter, YouTube, Fark. Wave at the nice man with the machine gun, guys. *wave*
source: ctv.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(260)
 
(WESH Orlando)
 
 
 
Learning Spanish could give a boost to your career, even if you're a robber
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(25)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this megaphone on the move
source: s.wsj.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Woman strips naked and leaps to her death after completing a self-help seminar
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(203)