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Sun May 10, 2009
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(Fark)
 
 
 
Today's Iron Photoshop ingredient: Bricks
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(Washington Times)
 
 
 
Set the flux capacitor to 1875. That's the last time Americans' carbon emissions matched the goals set by the Waxman-Markey legislation
source: washingtontimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(726)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
10-watt bulb finds pipe bombs in her driveway, attempts to deliver them to police station via school bus
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
Verizon loses a customer's broken phone, demanding a $320 equipment replacement fee. Then they learn about tracking numbers
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(136)
 
(Den Of Geek)
 
 
 
Anyone else bored with camera shake as a dramatic tool in films like Star Trek?
source: denofgeek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(371)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
1865 letter - Former slaveowner: "Sorry about that... say, can I get you to come back and work for me?" Former slave: "My 32 years of back wages, pay me them. Cash only."
source: radgeek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(300)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
55 humorous and scary mugshots (slideshow)
source: wsbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(96)
 
(Some lobsterman)
 
 
 
Things are tough all over: bologna and lobster selling for the same price, about $3.50 per pound
source: thechronicleherald.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(137)
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Pennsylvania bill would ban use of welfare benefits to buy alcohol
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(258)
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Bulging problem in Iraq: female soldiers getting pregnant so they'll get shipped home
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(232)
 
(ArabNews)
 
 
 
Your woman be shoppin too much? That's a court-approved pimp-slappin'
source: arabnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(130)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Photoshop these melon marketing masters
source: s.wsj.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
On my honor I will do my best, to do my duty to God and my country and to obey the scout law, to help other people at all times, to keep myself physically strong, mentally awake, and to totally whip your arse at beer pong
source: ktbs.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(snuff em and stuff em)
 
 
 
Some of the coolest taxidermy mounts you will ever see at the World Championship show
source: riverfronttimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(134)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Orangutan takes a break from organising the books to attempt daring escape. Ooook
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(93)
 
(Some Female)
 
 
 
Police officer honored for pretending to be a 13-year-old girl
source: southtownstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(170)
 
(Green Bay Press-Gazette)
 
 
 
Not news: Drunks urinate in public. News: On a police car. Fark: In the police station parking lot. Bonus: They took pictures
source: greenbaypressgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Iran moves to reduce the number of "Unnecessary Hangings"; admits that teen queens shouldn't swing
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(134)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
All helter skelter breaks out as suspicious fire guts Charles Manson's old Death Valley hideout
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(MaineToday.com)
 
 
 
If your plans this summer include driving your RV to Maine to enjoy the scenic views from the Wal-Mart parking lot, enjoy it while you can
source: pressherald.mainetoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(196)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
New documentary opens the closet door on prominent politicians who have hidden their homosexuality while actively working against gay causes. "I don't see it as outing, I see it as equalizing."
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(585)
 
(Some Guy Who Misses Mom)
 
 
 
I love my mom because ________ (with voting)
source: knox.villagesoup.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(330)
 
(NBC)
 
 
 
Timberlake and Samberg do it again - "Mother Lovers" is the new "Dick In A Box"
source: nbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(87)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Bear Grylls airlifted back to England for emergency surgery after being attacked by a vicious shard of bamboo. Mind you, bamboo cuts can be pretty nasty
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(82)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
American on social assistance whines that she was denied entry to Canada after border guards told her, "People on welfare shouldn't take vacations."
source: wlns.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(386)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Photoshop Theme: Create a charity drive for something that doesn't need one
source: images.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Actual headline: "Troops claim 'supernatural powers' after pygmy sodomy"
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(144)
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
12 years ago a couple tried everything they could to get pregnant and finally gave up. Church on Mother's Day was too painful. Then last year, Bill 52 & Susan 47 got a little surprise. Guess where they are going tomorrow
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(120)
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
For some reason, parents have a problem with a teacher that assigned students to plot a terrorism act as homework
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(82)
 
(The New Editor)
 
 
 
Not News: 101st airborne trooper stands to attention after his CO shouts "Currahee". News: That soldier was comatose and had his legs blown off, and the CO was General Petraeus
source: theneweditor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(347)
 
(9 News)
 
 
 
Bike bell ringers break world record for charity, urge to maim
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(14)
 
(Some Impressed Guy)
 
 
 
Disabled veteran, told he would never walk again, finally finishes London Marathon in 13 days. Hero tag continues to trump Followup tag
source: gnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(91)
 


Sat May 09, 2009
(Kansas City)
 
 
 
Police find man running down a street naked reciting the Lord's Prayer. Praise the Lord and pass the taser
source: kansascity.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Puppy eats alphabet magnets, poops next Dan Brown novel
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this possible Panamanian president
source: s.wsj.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
High school orders shot glasses to give to students as a prom party favor. Somebody's going to be very madd about this
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(75)
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
College officials across the country don't want to shake hands with the new grads when they give them their diplomas because of swine flu fears
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
"This is going to be a true zero-tolerance policy. If you are found in possession of a cellphone while in the course of your duties ... you will be terminated."
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(180)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Palm Beach police paragliders are watching you masturbate
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(75)
 
(BDCwire)
 
 
 
Amish face high unemployment, but will not take unemployment pay. Fortunately, because they don't have cable, they can't see they stories on how bad off they are
source: wbbm780.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Canadian's cheer as Tim Hortons announces 180 new stores to open, but the crowd turns ugly as they also mention the price of coffee and donuts may increase. Currently Vancouver, Toronto, Winnipeg and Halifax are burning
source: ca.news.finance.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(167)
 
(Tampa Bay Online)
 
 
 
Injured boaters being rescued after their boat exploded off of Beer Can Island. In other news, there is a mythical place called "Beer Can Island" located in Tampa Bay
source: www2.tbo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Actual headline on CNN: "'Brady Bunch' mom hugs a lot of people". I believe you now, Drew. I believe
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(BDCwire)
 
 
 
Slow news day: Just imagine what Chicago would look like without people. (w/pics)
source: wbbm780.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(93)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Law school party rankings: Arizona State #1; "fun goes to die" at Baylor
source: taxprof.typepad.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(114)
 
(9 News)
 
 
 
Man sentenced to life without parole for killing transgendered teen. But, because it was a hate crime, he received an additional 60 years.
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(525)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Caption what the guy in the pool is thinking
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
University of Georgia Homicide 101 professesor upgraded to Suicide 202 graduate
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(Newsday)
 
 
 
NYC to start charging rent for staying at homeless shelter. If only people who couldn't afford rent had some place to stay
source: newsday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(124)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Photoshop this jubilant driver
source: inapcache.boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
4, 29, 23, 31, 24, 9 and 8: Why do these numbers look so farking obvious now?
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Man jailed for 83 days after skipping jury duty
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(102)
 
(Orange County Register)
 
 
 
Mother upset that Disneyland Hotel refused to let MTV film her daughter's quinceañera (w/ pics of the poor, deprived princess)
source: ocresort.freedomblogging.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(226)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
McGruff solves case of missing Bacon. BACON
source: tywkiwdbi.blogspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
An early peek at how the FBI will further invade your life, or what they like to call "high-tech anti-crime tools"
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(AFP)
 
 
 
Turns out that not only wasn't Jesus a red-blooded American, he spoke some crazy foreign language that almost no one speaks anymore. Next thing you know, they'll say he wasn't even a Christian
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(268)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
What is about New England that has made it such a hub for gay acceptance? Except for those Puritan radicals in Rhode Island, of course. Scary people there, kind of like carnies, only with better teeth
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(118)
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Helicopter? No way. Covert surveillance van? Nope. Machine guns for your fancy boats? Not yours, Sheriff. The federal stimulus money is for your jail inmates
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
What's the punishment for committing fraud making billions off the Big Dig? Corporations can't go to jail and the money is gone, so that would be "nothing"
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(Some Bible Lover)
 
 
 
National Bible Bee seeking contestants for inaugural event, giving awkward homeschooled children everywhere something to strive for
source: silive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(Eagle Tribune)
 
 
 
Residents complain that state ruined their golf game by removing beaver dam that threatened major highway
source: eagletribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(15)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
New book confirms Ronald Reagan had three UFO encounters and believed they were spying on us for decades: "They've selected some desert in the West to make their landing"
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Could you give up your cell phone? Over half of Americans say it would be "very difficult" to do so, and would give up the internet, television, home phone or email before their cell phone
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(190)
 
(The Tennessean)
 
 
 
Veterans: Hey, remember those contaminated endoscopes that gave me HIV and Hepatitis? VA: Prove it
source: tennessean.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 
(Buffalo News)
 
 
 
Free two wrongly imprisoned people and help find a serial killer? You better believe thats a 60 day unpaid suspension
source: buffalonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Best. Sunglasses. Ever
source: dvice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(panama city news herald)
 
 
 
Florida County fires health inspector because he says fried chicken and donuts make you fat
source: newsherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Nanny state university bans ladders from its libraries amid health and safety concerns...but refuses to move books any lower because they've 'been there for 400 years'
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Lost your job? The FBI is hiring
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man arrested after being found wandering around in a "highly intoxicated state" with gold paint on his face. Oh yes, there is a mugshot
source: newswatch50.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Searching for a missing tourist, rescue team finds a different tourist's body. And a second body. And a third body. And a fourth body. And a fifth body. And a sixth body. And a seventh body
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
"Missing persons alert: Slutty women have disappeared, last seen circa the 'Sex and the City' era. The suspected loose lady-napper: Feminism."
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(244)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
In wake of text messaging crash, Boston authorities reassure drivers that cell phone service in tunnel will be restored soon
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(Herald Tribune (SW Florida))
 
 
 
If you're going to steal a minivan from the county water department and tool around town at 100 MPH, you might want to remove that "How's My Driving" bumper sticker first
source: heraldtribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(10)
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
If you are going to hit a 15-foot great white shark on the nose with the oar from your boat, try not to drop the oar in the water. Oh, and definitely don't fall into the water while trying to retrieve it
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
Stockholm police make two giant cocaine busts. Modern art just gets weirder every day
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(TheRecord.com)
 
 
 
Jack the cat left home one day, but got lost on the way back the very same day. It took ten months for him to find his way home, but he made it just in time for Caturday
source: news.therecord.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(1396)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Telling a lawmaker that you're "getting ready to go postal" if weed isn't legalized is NOT the way to demonstrate its benign, non-violent effects, dude
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
If you're going to urinate on someone's car, make sure he's not inside armed with a golf club
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this atomic energy lab
source: board.lutsk.ua   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
It's never good to find your girlfriend kissing her boss at the bar. It's even worse when it's two days before you're supposed to marry her
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(165)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Town votes to make mayor shave off handlebar moustache, untie damsel from railroad tracks
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Study shows most kids raised atheist eventually catch teh religion
source: theaustralian.news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(514)
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
Poet realizes there's the road less travelled, and the road that leads off a cliff
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
What would be the name/theme of your ideal bar? (with voting)
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(292)
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Hot: Naked woman knocks on your door in the middle of the night asking if you've got a cigarette. Not: She's fifty-two, lives in a trailer park, and there's a mugshot
source: blogs.tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Man's twin dies in the womb, bursts out of his stomach 30 years later. Ellen Ripley seen entering cryosleep to investigate, nuke site from orbit
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(97)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
As if the Boston subway system wasn't enough of a trainwreck already
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Snake head found in TGI Friday's meal was probably plant, improvement
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
If your teenage daughter has a dispute with a classmate, it is better if you do not post an ad offering sex with her friend's mother on Craigslist
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 


Fri May 08, 2009
(CBS13.com - CBS Sacramento)
 
 
 
Another eggsample of braisin' behavior as chicken thieves plan bird heist, pullet off. Hens, town residents left feeling Cornish itty
source: cbs13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
This bank manager's plan to rob his own bank was perfect... until he locked his keys in the vault and then set the cash on fire as a cover-up
source: wthr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop something fishy here
source: i40.tinypic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Protip: If you are gonna pass a bad check, please be sure to spell 'cashier's' correctly
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(15)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Forcing an inmate to place his penis on a sandwich before it is fed to another unsuspecting inmate: $25,000. Being fired and having the world read about it on Fark: Priceless
source: 10tv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(98)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Civic minded death row inmate cuts self with razor before execution. Prison officials patch wounds, execute him on schedule
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(Sun Herald)
 
 
 
Man attempts to rob bank with state trooper standing behind him in line. Tag for the would-be John Dillinger
source: sunherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
As Santa Barbara wildfires get so close they turn the overhead skies orange, teenagers do the only logical thing: have a pool party
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(WCBStv.com)
 
 
 
Teen says he stabbed NYC newsman George Weber to death accidentally. Roughly translates to "oops oops oops oops oops oops oops oops oops oops oops oops oops oops oops oops oops oops oops oops oops oops oops oops oops"
source: wcbstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(97)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Today's Criminal Mastermind Award goes to the guy who robbed a bank and walked away with $3,129 but left his wallet behind
source: blogs.pitch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(17)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Early contender in father of the year contest: threatens wife, punches daughter in face, and pushes son down steps. Judges award bonus points for son being in leg braces
source: thebaynet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
This week's TSG mugshot roundup: Can you handlebar the moustaches or handle the ears?
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(281)
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
How a conference designed to stop reckless spending cost taxpayers £500,000
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(21)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Official who OK'd Air Force One Manhattan flyover resigns, vows not to pay taxes until he is rehired
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(256)
 
(Other)
 
 
 
If you find some old dynamite, don't use a shotgun to blow it up or you'll end up on Fark
source: standard.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(Some Guys)
 
 
 
Photoshop this topsy-turvy twosome
source: img294.imageshack.us   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(WCBStv.com)
 
 
 
White House releases beautiful photograph that cost $328,000 and scared the bejeezus out of thousands of New Yorkers (photo included)
source: wcbstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(220)
 
(AFP)
 
 
 
Eating too much makes you fat. In other news, stabbing yourself in eyes makes you blind, cutting off legs may hinder ability to walk
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(SacBee)
 
 
 
California so broke it can't afford the handbasket to go to hell in
source: sacbee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(475)
 
(Santa Cruz Sentinel)
 
 
 
Santa Cruz couple caught demonstrating what City Hall has been doing to their residents for years
source: santacruzlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
US government-funded study sends researchers to cruise six bars in Buenos Aires to find out why gay men engage in risky sexual behavior while drunk. Apparently Larry Craig was unavailable
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(129)
 
(Kansas City)
 
 
 
16-year old girl lists her four-year old sister for sale on Craigslist as a joke. As you can imagine, the police have a problem with this
source: kansascity.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(78)
 
(Comedy Central)
 
 
 
Daily Show upgrades servers, now offers full download of last night's entire episode for free. Horseradish not included (Sponsored Link)
source: ccinsider.comedycentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(134)
 
(Cincinnati Enquirer)
 
 
 
Because of overcrowding, prison lets out early a man doing time for raping a teen but keeps in a 92-year-old man behind bars for DUI
source: news.cincinnati.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(115)
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Environmentalists protest plan to save endangered reptiles and threatened insects, proving once again that if it is not cute and fuzzy, it is not worth saving
source: seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(88)
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Swine flu victim in LaGrange is still seriously ill after two weeks. Doctors would like to help her, but don't know a-how-how-how-how
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(191)
 
(Kansas City)
 
 
 
Three year old wearing nothing but a t-shirt and a diaper is found after spending over two days in the woods after he slipped out the door of his parents trailer unnoticed. "It can happen to anyone," says father of the year candidate
source: kansascity.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(262)
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
County attorney wants to force boy with cancer to have chemotherapy, even though the boy and his family are fine with just taking vitamins and herbs
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(485)
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
Pro tip: If you're a teacher having sex with a student, do not post that you're falling in love with the girl on MySpace. Especially if you're married and your wife just had a baby
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(131)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Dear Ms. Rape Victim: You are delinquent in your payment for the rape kit used in your case. Please pay up or we will rape you again. Sincerely, the hospital
source: click2houston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(334)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Some people are having a problem with a Quebec convenience store chain's on-line ads showing clowns getting killed
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(119)
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
"I wanted it to be sexy but I didn't want sex," says politician who answered a Craigslist ad for an erotic massage that turned out to be a sting operation
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(195)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Australians say nation has drinking problem. "Sssssshhho khay .... mmmmerica ish driiiiving me home"
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(Dayton Daily News)
 
 
 
Modern day "Footloose" saga gripping podunk Ohio town where principal of Baptist school threatens student with suspension if he attends girlfriend's prom at her public high school
source: daytondailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(220)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
And the plot thickens. Carrie Prejean parent's accuse each other of being gay
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(395)
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
PSA: Don't rank girl classmates on appearance, you'll get a courtesy five day vacation from your high school
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(186)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
For NYC identity thieves, it is Christmas morning. You would think that a law firm would dispose of old client files properly, and not just dump them into 6 open public trash dumpsters
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Couple arrested for domestic violence at Blackhawks-Canucks game and charged with battery, which ironically is completely legal not 100 feet from where they were sitting
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
Star Trek Character, NPR Personality, or Food Additive
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(199)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Backyard cremations: still illegal
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(AFP)
 
 
 
Church pitches in to give homeless couple a lavish, "dream wedding"; still working on the "and tomorrow they'll still be living in a cardboard box " part
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
Man tries to hitch a ride with cop by throwing rocks at his patrol cruiser. Worked like a charm
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(16)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Scientists predict "iminent" volcano eruption in Congo. "The eruption could be tomorrow, or the day after ... or at any other time." You guys aren't REALLY scientists at all, are you?
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Slow news day: Emma takes over Emily as top baby name for girls. Jacob still the top boy's name, you uncreative bastards
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(344)
 
(I Heart Chaos)
 
 
 
18 fun atrocities committed in the Bible. God's not such a nice guy after all, turns out
source: iheartchaos.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(473)
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Three way sexual tryst goes haywire when they realize they're all men
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Feel-good story for Mothers Day: The 7 WORST births ever
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
Police say stabbing spree was done "for fun"
source: calgaryherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Taxi driver returns lost $32,000 to elderly couple; general public so grateful an honest taxi driver exists he has now been showered with $14,000 in donations. So, still down $18,000 on the deal
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
You may have thought that DC left J Street off of the street grid because they are a bunch of jerks that just can't do anything right. Well, yeah, that's pretty much the case
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(88)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
It's that time again. Friday Photo Fun from the guys at TSG. Match the band shirt to their biggest fans. Contest ends at 4pm Eastern
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(98)
 
(Some Guys)
 
 
 
Photoshop these men not seeing eye to eye
source: shorpy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(First Coast News)
 
 
 
City plans to euthanize nuisance ducks at park, taxpayers to get the bill
source: firstcoastnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(101)
 
(Dayton Daily News)
 
 
 
Dentist office explodes in Ohio. With pic of the large cavity
source: daytondailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Statue of Liberty's crown to reopen on July 4, giving visitors a totally sweet look at unannounced low-flying photo-op boondoggles
source: cityroom.blogs.nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Judge has no reservations at all about sentencing Wampanoag tribal leader to federal prison
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man gets seven years in jail for passing bad check to buy rare Spider-Man comic book. Expected to bust out in three days and threaten Aunt May
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Octomom is having her uterus removed about a year too late
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(170)
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Today's hot girl-on-girl action is brought to you by your daughter, her friend, and their perverted gossipy principal who had to show you the videotape
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(469)
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Siblings accused of $1 million adult diaper scam. Will they get pampered in prison? Depends
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
"People are more likely to pray if they are elderly, poor or female"
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(227)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Sign of the Times: Little League raffle car stolen. Fark: it's a 1993 Mercury Marquis
source: mymotherlode.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
When it comes to sex, it's usually a good thing if it feels like the earth moved. Unless you're a panda
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(JSOnline)
 
 
 
Looking for a new career? Apparently fire hydrant painting is the way to go
source: jsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this window guy
source: atitlan.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Gun teacher. Demonstration. Student. Face. -- You get the idea
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(146)
 
(KSL.com)
 
 
 
Things you shouldn't do with an unmarked white van: Taping up a sign saying "FREE CANDY INSIDE", placing a mattress and clothes on the van's floor, and parking it randomly in neighborhoods
source: ksl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(156)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Dad says his 11-year-old son hung himself because of his addiction to energy drinks. "These drinks are freely available"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(174)
 
(AFP)
 
 
 
Botswana to...wait, that can't be right...oh dear god
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(285)
 
(KNBC 4 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
California to build virtual fence to stop illegals, smoke monsters
source: nbclosangeles.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(103)
 


Thu May 07, 2009
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
US Postal Service reaches new heights of ignorance by losing an insured package of laptops valued at $3000. They then attempt to placate the customer by offering a $74 refund
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(270)
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Instead of raising the driving age to 18, The Insurance Institute for Highway Safety wants to LoJack every teenage driver so you can see them cut people off and crash into streetlights in real-time
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(149)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Due to the fact that no one has any money to do anything except...uh...."indoor activities," get ready for a 2nd BABY BOOM generation
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(161)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Most people taking thirteen days to complete a marathon are just lazy arse Farkers... this is a hero
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Meet Rebecca, the firefighter hoping to become Miss Wales. She's probably a bit lacking in the fleece department to stand much of a chance, but good luck to her anyway
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 
(SanDiegoUnionTribune)
 
 
 
Teen asks his godmother to buy him some beer. She gives him an offer he can't refuse
source: www3.signonsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(150)
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
Drew Peterson arrested in connection with the death of his third wife. Finally
source: chicagobreakingnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(147)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Chicago has 10 elevator inspectors for 20,000 elevators. What could possibly go wrong?
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(92)
 
(International Education)
 
 
 
Prisoners on day three of a hunger strike protesting the lack of radios in solitary confinement need to be reminded you can have all the radio you want if you don't break the law
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Theme: Photoshop a historical marker for a less than memorable event
source: upload.wikimedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(Pittsburgh Post Gazette)
 
 
 
Protip: If you appear in a gay porn video, chances are pretty good that somebody will recognize you, especially if you attend a Christian college
source: post-gazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(163)
 
(9 News)
 
 
 
Texas dog mysterously re-appears at home he left eight years ago, answers to "George"
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(TMZ)
 
 
 
Comedian Ron White to be investigated, city attorney to decide whether to pursue the case for the unpardonable crime of lighting a cigar on stage
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(239)
 
(International Education)
 
 
 
Maine lawyer tries to drive off in a booted truck, raising the bar on dumbass
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Teen barred from entering her prom because she smelled like pot wants the school to pay for her dress, her dinner, her hair and her tickets. "It was humiliating"
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(214)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
NYC students to Bristol Palin: STFU
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(250)
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
Not News: Guy keeps broken door in his backyard. News: Because the cops broke it down raiding the wrong house. Fark: City fines him $50 for having a broken door in his backyard
source: baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Bar owner lights cigarette inside health dpt office to protest Ohio smoking ban which penalizes businesses when their patrons smoke, then threatens to report them for allowing a smoking violation
source: sanduskyregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(273)
 
(IndyStar)
 
 
 
It is currently legal for an adult male to apply a spray-on tan to naked female juveniles in Indiana but act fast this is a limited time offer
source: indystar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(168)
 
(American Eagle)
 
 
 
Pictures and video of Maryland mall going *kaboom*. Terror threat level raised to plaid
source: wusa9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Having solved all the city's other problems, mayor wants to crack down on baristas who were skimpy outfits. "If I were dressed like that, I'd get arrested"
source: seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(Some Cynic)
 
 
 
You Can't Please Everyone: A collection of one-star reviews for classics that are generally considered to be masterpieces of their respective genres
source: cynical-c.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(177)
 
(KTAR)
 
 
 
Finally someone in the GOP is arrested for something other than gay sex
source: ktar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(170)
 
(WCBStv.com)
 
 
 
Kiefer Sutherland to surrender to police for head-butting incident. He'll explain later
source: wcbstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Reason Magazine)
 
 
 
Unless you live in Alaska, Delaware, Montana, New Hampshire, or Oregon, if you regularly buy things online then you are probably a tax cheat
source: reason.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(88)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
You know your state's senate election is going to be totally awesome when one candidate tells you not to Google her name while you're at work
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Obama wants more money in budget to catch those underreporting their income. If the IRS begins to enforce underreporting, who is he going to get for his cabinet positions?
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(92)
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Spokane goes full retard and tries to ban smoking on public golf courses
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(130)
 
(1010WINS)
 
 
 
Who just pleaded guilty to being a naughty Democratic fundraiser? Hsu. I don't know. Third base
source: 1010wins.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
If you're a paramedic denied alcohol because you're in uniform do you, c) return to the supermarket in nothing but socks and a thong
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Geometry teacher accused of sex with student. How could he be so obtuse?
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(138)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Farkette Hollybell and Farker Akazanar, Fark's first proposal, have been married 5 years today. Happy anniverary babe (link goes to original thread)
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(223)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Indian beggars prepare for next year's Commonwealth Games by learning to say 'I am an orphan', 'I have not eaten for days' and 'I am a deadbeat' in French, German and Spanish
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Clearly the prudent thing to do when piloting a rubber boat and armed with a rifle from the 1940's is to fire on a U.S. Navy ship
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(134)
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
The history of the made-up language of Klingon, which has no word for "hello." It does, however, have 11 words for "dateless virgin"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(163)
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
News: Man accused of using dog shock collar on his children. Fark: Not as a punishment, but because he "thought it was funny."
source: baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(167)
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
When you're wanted on drug charges in Virginia it's probably not a good idea to let them run a background check for an explosives license in Louisiana
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Note to self: After stealing a car and wrecking it, make sure you get your cell phone out of it. Especially if you have self portrait photos of yourself on said phone
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(Time)
 
 
 
TIME Magazine's top 10 panics ever. (Warning: slide show)
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(124)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Who keeps pandemic level at 5. Who did? Yes. Who kept the pandemic level? Yes. No I'm asking you
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(Reason Magazine)
 
 
 
New Zogby poll shows dirty hippies now outnumber crotchity old bastards
source: reason.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(237)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
The substance that Manny Ramirez was banned for was, indeed, a performance-enhancing substance, but not for the performance you're thinking of. Bow-chicka-bow-bow
source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(263)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Today's Walmart lawsuit ingredients: Louisiana, a nutria, and a spazzy woman. Bob Sacamano unavailable for comment
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Now that the panic level for Swine Flu is back down to medium yellowish-orange, CNN starts to hype the sequel. All bets on Madagascar shutting down can be made to your right
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(CNN)
 
NewsFlash
 
Ramirez suspended 50 games for taking it in the butt
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(470)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Old and busted: gross national product. New hotness: gross national happiness. I agree, a whole nation of happy people would be gross
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
The frequency of your Facebook status updates is directly proportional to the likelihood you are a narcissistic douchebag
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(371)
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
Today is "Odd Day". No, it's not the day that Bill O'Reilly starts making sense, it's one of a few dates involving three consecutive odd numbers: 5/7/09
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(129)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Builder of collapsed Cowboys facility has built 3 other structures since 2002 that have fallen during bad weather
source: nfl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(128)
 
(My San Antonio)
 
 
 
Breeder arrested on fraud charges, claims it's alpaca lies
source: mysanantonio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
If anyone recognizes this man, arrested for possession of weapons, cocaine, photo of four severed head on cell phone, please contact Santa Rosa County Sheriff's Department
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(119)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
While there are many ways to score a free lawnmower, pretending to be the father of a teenage DUI crash victim is probably the lowest
source: ydr.inyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
When making a memorial for flight 93, what could be more American than taking someone's land? (link now works)
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(345)
 
(Pocono Record)
 
 
 
Tip: If you're a politician and want to call someone a "sneaky back door nut sucker," don't put it in an email
source: poconorecord.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these hand bells
source: musiciselementary.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
More partially nude skeletons emerge from Miss California's closet
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(1102)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Possibly the strangest picture of a horse in a dress you'll see until the next round of publicity for Sex and the City
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Parents of precious snowflake who used a racial slur and threw the first punch in a fight with a black belted Korean schoolmate say he is "not a racist bully."
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(381)
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
Domino's YouTube woman can't find a job, keep hands off underaged girls
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(190)
 
(Foobies)
 
 
 
That is justice: Judges officially inspect brothel to certify the quality standard
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(Boston Channel)
 
 
 
Apparently "killing your girlfriend" is on the list of "things that will cause you to lose your medical license." Huh
source: thebostonchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Caption this photo of Iran's President Mahmoud Ahmanafarkcontest, ridin' dirty with his homies
source: photos.upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(Boston Channel)
 
 
 
If you are in the middle of shoplifting from a store, do NOT also stop to apply for a job from that store
source: thebostonchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Chuck Norris is so intimidating, even a life-sized photo of Chuck Norris propped up in a window is better at keeping crooks away than a burglar alarm. "This shop is under the protection of Chuck Norris."
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(137)
 
(Delaware Online)
 
 
 
If you are going to tear up a field, don't do it in a truck with your business name on it
source: delawareonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Irish soldiers deployed for combat missions in Africa forbidden from playing soccer or volleyball because they are "too dangerous"
source: examiner.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(MosNews)
 
 
 
A very determined resident of a Moscow suburb survived three suicide attempts in one day before the fourth one got him. At least he's not a quitter
source: mosnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Group of 12 trying to smuggle into England discovered in a chemical tank moments before it was to be filled with sulphuric acid. This is why you don't take the brown acid
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(75)
 
(PhysOrg.com)
 
 
 
Photoshop this woman and her chandelier
source: physorg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(Buffalo News)
 
 
 
Turkey tries to rob a Subway, but he's still a po' boy as he left without any cheddar because a hero rolled him out of the store
source: buffalonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Dinosaur extinction was outsourced
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(132)
 
(OK Magazine)
 
 
 
Who says Eastern Europeans are primitive, backward fools who'll believe any old superstition you throw at them? Anyway, over in Serbia (...)
source: ok.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(KEYT-3)
 
 
 
Not satisfied with the previous two fires, Santa Barbara goes for round three
source: keyt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 209: "In Close" Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(245)
 


Wed May 06, 2009
(National Review)
 
 
 
Helicopter mom finds out Stanford allows co-ed housing, tells her daughter to either drop out of school or pay for her last quarter on her own. Her LAST QUARTER
source: article.nationalreview.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(512)
 
(Star-Magazine (UK))
 
 
 
The latest celebrity weight-loss fad: One-and-a-half hours of Bikram yoga in a small room heated to 105 degrees. Yep, that'd do it
source: star-magazine.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
The "Great Oprah Fried Chicken Riots" of 2009
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(316)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Paris Hilton "would never do Leno." Well, that's one guy, anyway
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
If you ever wondered how dumb Paris Hilton is, or how much she gets paid for being dumb, wonder no more
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(205)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
We made a mistake, but since we got some really cool photos, we're gonna go ahead and use them anyway
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(98)
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
Canadian students held in China released after chinese officials calculate the beer tab
source: canada.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these vegetables
source: tracylee365.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(Celebitchy)
 
 
 
Director tapped to helm third Twilight film apologizes after old recording surfaces on which he said he wouldn't see Twilight "even on acid"
source: celebitchy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(106)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
10 things you never knew you needed to know about deodorant
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(120)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
The Phoenix Convention Center wants its liquor license suspended so the NRA can hold its meeting on premises next week
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(152)
 
(CTV)
 
 
 
Sixty-six year-old sealer rescued after spending two nights alone on an ice floe. Plans on going clubbing to celebrate
source: ctv.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(WPIX-TV)
 
 
 
Sheesh, it doesn't take a brain surgeon to... Oh, wait. I'm being told it does. Can anyone find a brain surgeon? Where have all the brain surgeons gone?
source: wpix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(72)
 
(National Enquirer)
 
 
 
Elizabeth Edwards: "I don't know if that baby is John's or not." Reilly Hunter: "Wanna find out?"
source: nationalenquirer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(161)
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
NewsFlash
 
Detroit Farkers; a suicidal domestic violence suspect in Warren is causing your rush hour goodness on the I-696. Because Detroit just doesn't have enough problems
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(111)
 
(Jacksonville.com)
 
 
 
Gallery of ugly ass baby jaguar pics. Mostly cute, except for the one where it's going to eat your soul
source: photos.jacksonville.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Saudi Arabia's "Miss Beautiful Morals" (w/ hot pic)
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(242)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
15 foot high shrub angers old man, sends wife into "bouts of violent shaking"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(82)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Clinton says US deeply regrets Afghan strike, but that won't stop us from doing it again like a hundred times, and also it's all Obama's fault because he sucks and America sucks for not electing her
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(450)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Kalamazoo "stink sleuths" track down the rotten broccoli smell that has permeated the city since last summer. Surprisingly, it's not Detroit's fault
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(58)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
The latest sign of God's divine existence has been found in cooked salami
source: wsbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(105)
 
(The Tennessean)
 
 
 
15 uses for old socks. Strangely absent from the list: "girlfriend"
source: tennessean.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(89)
 
(Discover)
 
 
 
Creationist member of the Texas state board of education puts the age of the universe up for a board vote. Seriously (with video)
source: blogs.discovermagazine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(1019)
 
(Onion AV Club)
 
 
 
18 not-so-subtle lessons learned from Star Trek. Not included: Never let Shatner direct
source: avclub.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(184)
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Eight years after drugs were decriminalized in Portugal, junkies roam the streets robbing old ladies, pushers operate in kindergartens, and everyone has AIDS. Just kidding. Drug related crimes, AIDS and even drug use are down
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(296)
 
(Crooks & Liars)
 
 
 
Rep Steve King (R-etard) complains that hate crimes bill will have a chilling effect on those wishing to assault gays. No, really
source: crooksandliars.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(711)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
In what may be the slowest news day in the history of slow news, newspaper reports that a rooster wandered into the county jail. "Whoa, we've got a rooster in here."
source: gazetteonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Columnist releases his list of Worst Airline Passengers of 2009, coincidentally identical to Fark's Greatest Hits of 2009 list
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(123)
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
Some people open a bottle of champagne to celebrate their son's release from jail. Some people get arrested after going out to illegally hunt pigs (mugshot)
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Two more Florida state prisons admit to using stun guns on kids during "Take our daughters and sons to work day". Ohmy
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(C|Net)
 
 
 
Dying gamer tried to write killer's name in own blood. Will probably get him after he respawns
source: news.cnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(270)
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
Police find a palm tree decorated with dead seagulls, decaying fish, and random toys. Looks like they're celebrating Christmas early in Florida
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Interviewed on Good Morning America, new mom Bristol Palin says abstinence is a realistic method of controlling teen pregnancy (w/video)
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(1070)
 
(Boston Herald)
 
 
 
Maine comes the fifth state to legalize gay marriage and to be crossed off Joe the Plumber's vacation list
source: bostonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(458)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Statistics reveal the most dangerous vehicles on British roads: police cars
source: northantset.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Woman refuses to carry out her community punishment unless she can wear high heels
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(113)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
Thousand of giant venomous spiders invade Australian town in latest proof God hates Australia. And if you hate spiders, do NOT click on the link
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(262)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"Does a person even need a license to give a massage to a horse? I don't understand why this [cease and desist] letter hasn't already been withdrawn."
source: mddailyrecord.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
New scam warns of crooks posing as friends on Facebook, then hitting you up for cash. Or they could just be your real friends who are broke. In which case, maybe it's just time to get new friends. Screw you and your money
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this totally hip dude
source: 22.media.tumblr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(Globe and Mail)
 
 
 
Cajun chicken, beef bourguignon, crab legs, filet mignon and poutine - just an average field dinner for Canadian troops in Afghanistan: "I've had soldiers tell me they're never going anywhere again without their cooks"
source: theglobeandmail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(138)
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
My family, friends, and the folks at the University of Houston were all really proud of me when I signed as a free agent for the Saints. But then I got caught peeing in the street
source: sports.espn.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
For an hour yesterday, the two most powerful men in America held an all important summit and come to the conclusion that Ray's Hellburger makes a darn tasty burger
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(213)
 
(BDCwire)
 
 
 
Redlight cams popping up in cities across the US, for safety, not revenue. New gadget alerts you to red light cam intersections for safety, not to help you beat a ticket
source: wbbm780.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(222)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
I shot an Arrow into the air/And missed the Trooper standing there/Then tried so bravely to fight and go/Until I hollered 'Don't Tase me, bro'
source: eveningsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(The Dude)
 
 
 
How the Dude came to love Lebowski Fest (this weekend). And proud we are of all of them
source: thewrap.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Mother of the year candidate for today hails from Prince Albert, Saskatchewan. Key words: "Walmart," "didn't know she was pregnant," "baby abandoned in toilet bowl"
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(119)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Sigh...wow. Dying woman tattoos pictures of her pets on her body so she can take them with her. Which kind of crazy designation covers this?
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 
(San Francisco 49ers)
 
 
 
Police: Resident calls 911 when house with false wall hiding marijuana plants catches fire
source: hamptonroads.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Young attractive white girl becomes first American to die of Swine flu. In the 24-hour cable news world, this is also known as "the perfect storm"
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(141)
 
(Boston Herald)
 
 
 
"If Craigslist CEO Jim Buckmaster doesn't take down his erotic ads in South Carolina within 10 days, he faces prosecution related to obscenity and prostitution."
source: bostonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(177)
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Meet Ben. He's going to be paid $120,000-a-year to sit on a tropical island and go swimming
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(147)
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
During these recession days, Wal-mart finds that sales of frozen vegetables are up, sales of Angus beef are down, and, mysteriously, $5 white toilet seats are a hot item near Denver
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(109)
 
(wtol)
 
 
 
Detroit elects new mayor on 15 percent voter turnout, or in other words, all the people left living there
source: wtol.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(102)
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
And the award for the most aptly named benefits-sponger goes to
source: dailyexpress.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(Hamilton Spectator)
 
 
 
"Hi, guys. These grenades look like grenades, are they grenades? Why is everyone running?"
source: thespec.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Remember the outrageous $100 million in bonuses that AIG gave to its employees in 2008? Turns out that figure was a little off - by a factor of 4
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(202)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Daily Mail runs a story on a 17 year old girl who drinks a litre of vodka and 8 cans of beer every day and somehow forgets to tell us what her Fark handle is
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(141)
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Hammer, axe, golf club and pool cue used in fight. Axe beats pool cue, paper beats axe
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Speed camera boss provides robust evidence - of himself speeding
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
More than 1/5 of homeowners are upside-down, according to bullshiat website that uses Google maps and tax records to invent bloated home values for people
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(208)
 
(The Volokh Conspiracy)
 
 
 
Chrysler isn't paying back any of the $7 billion in bailout money it received. Instead, taxpayers get an 8% equity stake. So go to a dealer and pick yourself out a nice Caliber
source: volokh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(264)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Alcohol, which was good for your health, then bad for your health, then good for your health, then bad for your health, is good for your health again. Stay tuned to this space tomorrow for the study saying it's bad again
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Michelle Obama wears a dress when visiting the UN that she has worn before EVERYBODY PANIC
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(328)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
I know that buskers are usually rubbish, but surely this is taking it a bit far?
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(The Newspaper)
 
 
 
"[Officer] Kessel noticed that Clower's eyes were 'glassy'. Clower, in fact, has a glass eye"
source: thenewspaper.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Therapy dogs will be available for stressed-out students to hug during Finals Week at the University of Wisconsin-Madison. Whatever happened to pounding some beers and playing video games in your buddy's dorm room?
source: madison.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Man sues New Orleans Police Department over right to wear skirt to municipal court. Fark: For $1 in damages
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Mom rents a banquet hall to hold a pajama party for her daughters. More than 100 people show up, many under 16. Somebody gets shot. That's not how it ends on Cinemax
source: wxii12.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Iron Photoshop ingredient: guitar pick
source: images.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(KCRA 3 Sacramento)
 
 
 
Today's "Teenage girl logs 300,000 text messages in a month" story brought to you by Sacramento, CA
source: kcra.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(144)
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
Swedish airport authority fires several employees for spending up to 75% of their days surfing porn sites. Pfffft, amateurs
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
West Virginia woman wins lottery for fifth time
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(91)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Developer forced to build $30,000 heated house for endangered bat after it was found on property he wanted to build on. "It was costly, but faintly amusing," he allows (w/ pic of bat condo)
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(154)
 


Tue May 05, 2009
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Couple goes to Caribbean for wedding, get struck with gastric illness, ruining entire trip. Next comes the part where someone, somewhere has to pay for this
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(121)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Smuggler arrested with 14 birds in his pants. Includes amazing evidence photo
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(134)
 
(Sky News)
 
 
 
More than twice as many women binge-drinking now than in 1998, making every night out at the bar a target-rich environment, guys
source: news.sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Gov. Schwarzenegger: "California should consider legalizing marijuana. I oppose it, for the record. I'm not saying we should. I'm just saying, you know, hey, whatever. I oppose it. But we should talk about it"
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(426)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
60% of men find church not macho enough, want manlier hymns, fewer flowers, less dancing, buffed Jesus
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(103)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this blue ribbon winner
source: bellavitaranch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Attorney General warns Craigslist: Either remove ads or we will be forced to warn you again
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Miss California might lose her crown. Where is your God now?
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(1020)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
China decides "smoke or else" policy is a stupid idea, returns to tried and tested "quit complaining or else" strategy
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Hot? No. White? No. Woman? Yes. On Nancy Grace? WTF???
source: us.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(132)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Squirrel gate, perhaps the greatest scandal of our time
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Only pig in Afghanistan quarantined over swine-flu fears
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(92)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
One single red-light camera at one intersection in Atlanta found to generate $1.3 million a year in revenue for the city. Remember, it's all about the safety
source: knoxviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(369)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Ontario places cameras in forests to prove cougars exist, Ashton Kutcher set out as bait
source: ottawacitizen.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(124)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
82-year-old German man calls cops on loud neighbors, but it was just his own musical greeting card. Everyone relieved to learn it's not really raining men
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Nanny State rules youth convicted of carrying a switchblade and brass knuckles didn't have to wear a bright-yellow vest while doing his court-ordered community work because he found it "embarassing" and breached his human rights
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(naples news)
 
 
 
Tip of the day: If you're asked to leave a bar, don't pee on it instead. If you're approached by the police, don't run. If you're arrested, don't fight. Or, you can be Fark's Mugshot of the Day
source: naplesnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(121)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Spokesman for Mullah Omar: The Taliban will never stop until they control Afghanistan and implement Islamic rule. Also, women are icky
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(115)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Don't flush your unused pills; the trout will grow breasts. If you can't sell them to local teens, dispose of them at the drugstore
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(172)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Stocks fall on news of Miley Cyrus virginity pact
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(131)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Sure, you could argue that there are places other than Britain more worthy of the "nanny state" tag, but then you'll read all about how you now require proof of age to buy a teaspoon, so why bother?
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(104)
 
(Palm Beach Post)
 
 
 
Vincent Van Gogh busted on a cocaine charge. No, not THAT Vincent Van Gogh. With helpful pictures provided to eliminate confusion
source: palmbeachpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Why do muslims prefer sharia law over more civilized western systems? Because it is impartial, the system actually works and you can get your case decided in days, not years. Of course if you lose, it may cost you an arm or a leg
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(472)
 
(Wisconsin State Journal)
 
 
 
Proposed rule would allow University of Wisconsin System to punish students for off-campus behavior
source: madison.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(135)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Homeless man jumps in frigid Red River to rescue teen. "The firefighters said to me, 'You're a hero, you saved a life'. I said, 'Well, possibly, but can I get a blanket? I'm kind of cold' "
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(87)
 
(Atom)
 
 
 
Worlds Greatest Beer Names. Nothin like suckin down a Mad Biatch
source: community.atom.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(216)
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
This summer, don't buy magazines being sold door-to-door by young people. They're not paying for college; they're scamming your gullible, cheap Field-and-Stream-loving ass
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(389)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these bronze geese
source: peacham.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
Car window FAIL
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(some gringo)
 
 
 
Cinco de Mayo is a much bigger deal in the U.S. than it is in Mexico
source: wwl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(243)
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
Canadian students fine with being in Chinese quarantine. "They have beer here, so it is easy to pass time with beer"
source: edmontonjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(88)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Not News: fight breaks out at prisons. Fark: Its between the prison guards and the police
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Study show US is on trend for cancer cases to rise 45% by 2030. Still no cure for cancer
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Hitler's autobiography flying off the shelves in India, being seen as a self-improvement and management guide. Oh, pshaw, the guy couldn't even finish a race
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(209)
 
(LBC 97.3)
 
 
 
Judge reprimanded after throwing domestic violence victim in jail for throwing abusive husband out of the house
source: wtsp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
Man uses of a Broken Dresser of Protection (+3) to defend himself from a man swinging a Drunken Sword of Vengeance (+5). Police break up the fight using the Pepper Spray of Justice (+7)
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(139)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Nanny state to replace science class with computer class. Afterall, who needs to know science when you can look it up on wikipedia?
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(BDCwire)
 
 
 
Project Squirrel: when in Chicago, mark down when you see squirrels. And when you don't. And when you see them grab their nuts
source: wbbm780.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
Parents of bullied Swedish schoolboy hire a bodyguard to accompany him to classes, because there's absolutely no way this plan could backfire
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(145)
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
What do Einstein, Dalí, and Hemingway have in common, besides an affinity for mustaches? The links between mental illness and creative genius
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(189)
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
Man who suffers from osteogenesis imperfecta has suffered over 200 fractures, is only three feet tall, and has to use a child's seat while in a car. He's also an author, a motivational speaker, and is mulling a run for congress
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(82)
 
(Some Patriot)
 
 
 
Hardware store owner is proud of his huge gun-shaped flag pole; "What states more what it takes to get our freedom than a gun?"
source: theindychannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(182)
 
(TMZ)
 
 
 
Dom DeLuise dies. He was 75. Goodnight, funnyman
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(427)
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Study finds that dog food tastes like pate --- according to some poor schmuck who was paid to eat dog food
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
Swedish couple continue legal fight to name their son "Q", possibly because it's the only way they'll ever remember how to spell his name
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
Make-A-Wish grants 6-year-old Florida girl her wish -- not to be a Disney princess as one might expect, but to meet rocker Ted Nugent
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(240)
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
Dear Stone Manor Resident, Stone Manor has been sold to HUD and section 8, and you make too much money and actually pay your rent. Get out
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(394)
 
(BDCwire)
 
 
 
Blago turns down offer to become "Cathouse Apprentice" at Moonight Bunny Ranch outside Vegas. Offer may now go to Drew Peterson
source: wbbm780.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(Globe and Mail)
 
 
 
After firestorm of publicity to suspend and expel bullied teen, School Board reverses unreversable decision to suspend, cancels expulsion hearing, expunges record, apologies and crawls back under rock
source: theglobeandmail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(154)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
"An Oompa-Loompa, Spiderman and Tinky Winky were arrested during a drunken brawl at the Welcome Family Holiday Park." Or, as it's known around here, Sunday night
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Every now and then someone comes up with an idea which will utterly revolutionise the way we live, and open doors to possibilities we could never have imagined. This is not that idea
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(113)
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
"Police found the brothers crouched on toilets in the stalls of a women's restroom, after the suspects used falsetto voices to make officers think they were women"
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Not News: London Evening Standard prints apology. News: On the sides of buses. Fark: Telling readers it's sorry for sucking so much
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Recession causing men to become nurses, stay-at-home dads. EVERYBODY (at ABC News) PANIC
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(168)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
While they're living there in Allentown, a burglar was spreading pudding around, in Bethlehem apartment homes, on all the doors, no word if it's lime
source: wmtw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(MosNews)
 
 
 
Just one month after undergoing a penis enlargement surgery, a patient of a Moscow plastic surgery clinic has asked the doctors to restore the original size of his penis
source: mosnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(269)
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Protip: if you work for an armoured car company and steal $2 million from them, wait until things die down a bit before buying all the boats, cars, wine, watches and $3,000 cognac
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(Mental Floss)
 
 
 
Who approved that? Food promotions gone horribly wrong. Existence of Taco Bell sadly not on list, but submitter is happy to get photo credit on #7
source: mentalfloss.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(118)
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
Today's winner of the 'Model of Efficiency' award goes to the DC suburbs, where dozens of towns, that are stacked on top of each other, enforce different traffic laws. You can get a ticket on one side of the street but not the other
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Mother suffers heart failure after giving birth to massive 13 pound baby: "He has an incredible appetite - he's like a little dustbin"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this penguin and a banner that flew in the last war
source: blogs.princeton.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Study finds obese children more likely to have allergies, ask if you're going to eat that
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(77)
 
(Ottawa Sun)
 
 
 
News: Worker finds meteorite piece worth $400,000 on farmer's land, turns it over to him. Fark: Farmer then donates it to a university
source: ottawasun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(the star online)
 
 
 
Secretary accidentally bites off boss' penis. Then it gets weird
source: