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Sun April 26, 2009
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Newest thing in car tech? Device that limits teenagers from driving over 80. Back in my day, we called that a Chevette
source: finance.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Photo Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this big shooter
source: juzaphoto.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Palm Beach Post)
 
 
 
70-year old man dies saving two young boys from drowning. Just this time, Hero trumps Florida tag
source: palmbeachpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
ACLU fighting to protect "pranksters and protestors" from sex-offender registry. If you have no idea what that means, here's a picture of a naked man with a pumpkin on his head
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
Jeremy Clarkson on quitting drinking: "I no longer have to spend the morning clinging onto things. And I haven't had a lumpy yawn for a whole week now. Perhaps that's why I'm still fat. I've stopped vomiting"
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Salmonella-tainted peanuts. New Hotness: Swine-flu tainted pork
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this festive, flare-fisted Frenchman
source: s.wsj.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Brothels cut prices, offer discounts, loyalty cards and 'extras', to beat the recession
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BDCwire)
 
 
 
Tons of WWII artifacts lay on the bottom of Lake Michigan, from training mistakes in the 40's, as plane is lifted from the waters (w/pics)
source: wbbm780.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
The ravages of man-bird-pig flu continues as US declares national health emergency. Expect martial law and quarantine camps by Friday
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
1999 Join Department; 2001 Threaten to kill wife; 2005 Shoot and kill unarmed suspect; 2008 Officer of the Year; 2008 Drunk Driving Arrest; 2009 Shoot self in leg at local bar - Typical career of Council Bluffs, Iowa Police Officer
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wordpress)
 
 
 
Lighthouse keeper opens the most isolated café in Scotland. While I respect that a lot, I'd be fired if that were my job, after killing Jason off and countless screaming Argonauts
source: deadlinescotland.wordpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Albany Times Union)
 
 
 
If you're not willing to eat a bowl of woodchuck and parsnip you don't deserve to survive this depression
source: timesunion.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegram)
 
 
 
Paramedics have heart attack victim walk down three flights of stairs, decide maybe that little factoid could be left out of the official report on his death
source: telegram.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Arizona Star)
 
 
 
Arizona will spend $1.5 million stimulus money replacing obsolete metric signs with shiny new American signs
source: azstarnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Standard Times)
 
 
 
Power to Bristol County jail will be turned off Monday because Massachusetts politicians stopped bailing out sheriffs who routinely exceed their budgets
source: southcoasttoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Austin Statesman)
 
 
 
Engineers make math error while installing poles on field, instability ensues
source: statesman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
The strongest 72-year-old you'll ever meet. They'll say, "Is he still alive? He lifts weights? You got to be kidding. He was old then."
source: eveningsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Pirates attack Italian cruise ship, repelled by Jewish ninjas
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this NASA part test
source: ibex.swri.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Man gets called into work so he can be fired, returns home to find his house on fire. Wishes he had been laid off
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
Soon to be added to MI6 spy training handbook: Please don't leave a non-encrypted memory stick containing details of all our secret anti-drug operations on a bus. In Columbia
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Chicago man opens up a hot dog stand that employs only ex-cons, with the slogan "Home of the misdemeanor wiener"
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ohio.com)
 
 
 
Shots fired into crowd of student rioters at Kent State University. This is not a repeat from 1970
source: ohio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Four things to consider before you try to join the Amish. "Are all Amish women as smoking hot as Kelly McGillis?" curiously absent
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
Utah Republicans defeat a resolution they believe was part of a satanic plan sponsored by the Democratic party and an 'invisible government.' "Satan's ultimate goal is to destroy the family."
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KMTV)
 
 
 
Mary Cronin, Westside High Class of '83, wants you to join her on Classmates.com. Problem is, she was murdered in 1992
source: kmtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
Man sent to hospital with 22cm angle grinder blade lodged in his face. "He had a deep cut which went from just above his teeth, through his top lip, through his nose and one of his eyes and into his skull"
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
Photoshop this bubble bath
source: spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
It takes a special kind of moran to toss two large paint thinner drums onto a bonfire at a birthday party
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat April 25, 2009
(WSPA.com)
 
 
 
Man finds Hidden Falls, falls
source: wspa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
Town residents use mosquitoes as "teen repellent" to keep kids from loitering in streets, off their lawns
source: spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS11tv.com)
 
 
 
Ugly-ass baby chimp born at Dallas Zoo. With awww pic
source: cbs11tv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox Orlando)
 
 
 
Teachers pose topless for calendar spread to raise money for cancer research. Hilarity ensues
source: myfoxorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Chick)
 
 
 
While mom is being busted for running a meth lab in their mobile home with their three small children inside, dad drives slowly by and is arrested for running a meth lab in their car
source: journalgazette.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Today's "science confirms what you already knew" segment: Eating tofu really does make you a sissy boy
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Meet the world's smallest bodybuilder (video)
source: cosmos.bcst.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Iowan)
 
 
 
Veteran Iowa City PD evidence manager oversees two "caves" stuffed with unfathomable amounts of drugs, ninja swords, barbaric maces, and exactly one shrunken head
source: press-citizen.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
For an office prank, boss pretends to shoot a co-worker. Employee oversees the 'shooting', bloodies himself jumping two razor wire fences, sprints half a mile to call 911, sending police in force. Good times
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop your own brand name knockoff
source: ofb.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Finally, a Bea Arthur story you can't fap to
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Chick)
 
 
 
After a landslide unearths a 9' by 4' rock formation in the shape of a hand in his backyard, man calls it the "Hand of God" and believes it was put there to help him financially. eBay bidding begins at $100
source: idahostatesman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
The Google maps alphabet from A to Z (Aerial Photos)...Warning - slide show
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News2)
 
 
 
Teens carrying replica handguns for "protection" Police- "You're doing it wrong."
source: wkrn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
The future king of England is going bald at 26 [pic]
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 4 KC)
 
 
 
Mother of the Year candidate didn't seek treatment for her burned son because she didn't want to pay for the ambulance. (with scary mugshot)
source: fox4kc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Old: Dog bites. New: Dog maces family. Your dog really wants his own taser
source: katu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Texas residents will now have to pay if they choose to be a dumbass, literally
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Examiner)
 
 
 
President Mexico City: "SHUT...DOWN...EVERYTHING"
source: examiner.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Wisconsin teen charged with felony burglary, possession of burglar tools and bail jumping in an effort to: A) Raise money for his sick mother's surgery B) Gang Initiation C) raise money to pay a lawyer to defend him on other charges
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Fark you, squirrel
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Nanny state holiday resort cuts down all its palm trees in case muggers 'hide behind them'
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
For nearly the price of a car you can buy a "Bling Bikini" in Europe...How's that recession thingy going for YOU?
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Pull out the 2-up, grab a beer, and wish a happy ANZAC day to all our Aussie and Kiwi farkers. Lest we Forget
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Woman says she feels only pity and hope for man who bound, gagged and blindfolded her in the trunk of her own car then abandoned her to die as he drank champagne
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this ominous clocktower
source: flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Breitbart.com)
 
 
 
Ceiling owl is watching you buy tools and lumber. YARLY
source: breitbart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Ex-Louisiana KKK chief David Duke wrote a Czech his butt won't be able to cash
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(goldcoast.com)
 
 
 
22-pound cat named Lion put on a strict diet. With adorable pictures and video for Caturday
source: goldcoast.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Earth Times)
 
 
 
So many dangerously unqualified idiots are climbing Mount Everest that Nepal Telcom is providing cell phone coverage for the mountain so they can dial 911 when their espresso machines break on the way to the summit
source: earthtimes.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
"At 41 cents per 100 calories, White Castle's snack-sized cheeseburger bested every other sandwich in our survey when it came to cost per calorie"
source: finance.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
What skills do you have that would be useful in a post apocalypse world? (with voting)
source: incaseofapocalypse.blogspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
If you find a .22 cartridge in your yard do you: A. Bury it. B. Soak it in water then throw it away. C. Hit it with a hammer and shoot yourself in the stomach?
source: wane.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Problem: tiny town gets infested with millions of bugs. Solution: deploy Led Zeppelin
source: online.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(4Utah.com)
 
 
 
Ever wonder how Wal-Mart is able to offer prescription drugs for such low prices? Turns out they've been getting them via illegal alien couriers
source: abc4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Couple caught having sex in dumpster. I told you she was trash
source: theprovince.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this hanging phone
source: flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Channel)
 
 
 
Former pirate hostage blasts Rush Limbaugh for mocking President Obama by calling three, sniper-picked-off pirates "black teenagers."
source: thebostonchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri April 24, 2009
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Typing error leads police to grab a man off the street and lock him up for several days. Harry Tuttle nods his head in understanding before being taken away
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
13 injured in Tennessee fish fry accident. Where is your cod now?
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ClarionLedger)
 
 
 
Six arrested in Hattiesburg prostitution sting (w/ "there is not enough eye bleach" mugshots)
source: clarionledger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Swine flu kills dozens in Mexico as there is now concern over possible global pandemic, bacon shortage
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Teacher shows student more than geography - blue lines are not roads (with pic)
source: mywesttexas.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Bring in the tiny violin for constipated Oklahoma City bomber. No, not that one, the smaller one
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Girls)
 
 
 
Caption this rumor mill
source: girlshelpinggirls.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Apparently there's a new Cannonball Run sequel filming in Oregon
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seacoastonline.com)
 
 
 
The Portsmouth City Council was "freaked out" by a mannequin seated outside a local boutique. FREAKED OUT
source: seacoastonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
With budget impasse still unresolved, legislature debates whether new Christian license plate should have stained glass, cross or Jesus Chainsaw Massacre displayed
source: blogs.tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
This week's TSG mugshot roundup: It's all fun & games until Obama shows up
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Where do birds strike planes most frequently? Howbout the air, durrrr
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Late Night with Jimmy Fallon)
 
 
 
Rashida Jones loves Fark (from her Internet Personality Test)
source: latenightwithjimmyfallon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Riverfront Times)
 
 
 
Missouri woman's anxiety disorder is only appeased by her pet monkeys. All 26 of them
source: blogs.riverfronttimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Eskimos have over 30 words for GTFO
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AOL)
 
 
 
In today's 'the economy is screwed' news: Woman tries to sell her 5-month-old son for $10,000 to get money for a new apartment
source: news.aol.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(lehighvalleylive)
 
 
 
N.J. senator wants federal money to educate teens about Web safety and to fight 'sexting.' Uh, isn't that the parents' job?
source: lehighvalleylive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this smoking solitary woman
source: flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Spike)
 
 
 
Top 10 fashion fads that need to come back. Wait it wasn't cool to wear a fanny pack?
source: spike.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
You're in the middle of the jungle and you got an old Boeing 727 laying around, what do you do? Build the coolest luxurious hotel, of course
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Drew Peterson dragged two of his children along with him for his latest morning show appearance Friday and sat by while one explained his murdered mother's death away, saying, "Accidents happen all the time."
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AFP)
 
 
 
Finally, art that we can all agree has intrinsic value - a board full of photos of politicians that gallery visitors can shoot with an air rifle
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Live Science)
 
 
 
Study finds that denial can bring marital bliss. Submitter doesn't know what the hell they're talking about, my marriage is just fine the way it is
source: livescience.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
The economy is getting so bad, animals are now being fired from the Bronx Zoo
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Owners in DC don't own the land between their front door and the sidewalk, but they are responsible for maintenence. It's why you can get a ticket for drinking beer on your front porch or a ticket for parking in your driveway
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
When Pakistan eventually collapses into chaos, the Pentagon has a plan to go into the country and seize its 100 nukes so the Taliban can't get them
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Woman gets fired after employer noticed she was updating her Facebook page after calling in sick to work
source: uk.reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AFP)
 
 
 
Berlin to host the second annual international toad song contest, which will be sponsored by Bud. Weis. Er
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
When someone owns the world's fattest hedgehog you can be sure The Sun will be there (pics)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Chinese firms often copycat brand names by switching a couple of letters around. Here's a couple of companies that are doing it all wrong
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
ACLU turns its grim visage upon the greatest threat to civil liberties: banned personalized license plates. Bonus: "IM4BEEF' and "GAYSROK" were OK, but "MERLOT" was not
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
The forgotten victims of the recession: the world's actual poor people, not the people who are three months behind on their payments on the 46" LCD TV and X-Box
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Meh, just a fractured spine. Here, have these crutches
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
Software on red light cameras isn't yet sophisticated enough to realize it shouldn't ticket you if a police officer is waving you through the red light
source: calgaryherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Car salesman dies at NASCAR race, but as his obit notes, "We are sure he would still want all to know that 0.9% financing is still available on all New 2008 Hummer H2's"
source: legacy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Chattanoogan)
 
 
 
College students use Facebook to engineer a siege of the college library chanting "Let us in" and "Take the Library". Seriously, the library? You're doing it wrong
source: chattanoogan.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
One-eyed, three-legged alligator discovered on beach. Happy Gilmore pounces on it, beats almighty snot out of it
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Latest unintended consequence of the recession? Men are abandoning boxer shorts and buying tighty whiteys instead. Really
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
If the invasive Snakehead fish continues to thrive in MD, it could mean big problems. That is, until we learn that it tastes good with a cold beer and covered in Old Bay seasoning, then we'll fish it to extinction like the Blue Crab
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Sun)
 
 
 
Great Train Robber trying to get parole, remake with George Clooney and Brad Pitt
source: torontosun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Canadian man takes it upon himself to conduct empirical test proving that the average Ferrari is still faster than the average police cruiser
source: vancouversun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Gripped by the recession's steely hands, more Americans are starting to pull out their earbuds, adjust their fannypacks, and rethink the definition of the word "necessity"
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Gas company says there is no silver bullet for preventing hypothermia deaths. Well, except for leaving the gas turned on, but that would be ridiculous
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTMJ)
 
 
 
An apartment rental company wants $2,060 in unpaid rent, late fees and early termination fees from a man. One problem. He can't pay it because was MURDERED
source: 620wtmj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
German parents who abandoned their children in an Italian restaurant did so because they had run out of money. Clearly they've never heard of eBay
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Today's Friday Photo Fun from our buddys at TSG. Match the perp to the talking head with the same name. This one looks tough. Contest ends at 4pm Eastern
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Friends of accused Craigslist killer: "You got the wrong guy" Cops: "Um, the gun found in his apt. has been matched as the gun that killed a woman." Friends: "......oh....."
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Coolest farking pastor ever cited for a bow and arrow demonstration in church, later charged with keeping a concealed pistol under his body armor
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Badly mixed supplement to blame for polo horse deaths, most of the home runs hit in the 1990s
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WJZ.com)
 
 
 
Man desperately needed bone marrow transplant to save his life, but in a pool of seven million donors not a single one was a match. So his 9-year-old daughter saves her fathers life by being the youngest bone marrow donor in history
source: wjz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Las Vegas Sun)
 
 
 
Ivy Leaguer 'infiltrates' Jerry Falwell's Liberty University, discovers that students are "rigorously normal," watch R-rated movies, fret about getting into law school, and have impure thoughts. Who knew?
source: lasvegassun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFSB)
 
 
 
Man outraged by dogs "doing their business" in cemetery because the only thing scarier than zombies, is zombies covered in dog poo
source: wfsb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sky News)
 
 
 
Auditions for new Hellraiser movie go horribly wrong
source: news.sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
Swedish man jailed for blowing his nose all over a shop assistant. It's snot news, it's Fark.com
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
The world's biggest beer mat company has declared itself bankrupt. Raise your glasses and enjoy the beer mat gallery
source: spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Woman's husband is shot and killed. Her attempt to get his life insurance payout is denied by the insurance company. Because he had Hep C
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Step 1: Organize bomb threat on school to get day off school. Step 2: Drop out of school, have school discover bomb threat and press charges. Step 3: Fark
source: dailyitem.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: New uses for outdated technology
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Just like car loans and mortgages, marriages should be set up into 5- and 10-year contracts
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Two men attack 84-year old, limp away in pain. World War II veterans know they're cool
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
Police officer shoots bear running away from circus. Circus calls action ursinine, while grizzled officer says "Oh pooh, grunt and bear it." Bear
source: spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tampa Bay Online)
 
 
 
*Ding Dong* "Who is it?" "Land Gator" "Oh, Charles, are you pretending to be that awful Land ... OH MY GOD NOOOOO"
source: www2.tbo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WWSB ABC 7)
 
 
 
And then there's that special level of stupid for those people who run stop signs, while smoking joints, carrying 209 pot plants in open back seat of car
source: mysuncoast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
If someone had just paid $100,000 for Hitler's paintings in the 1920s instead of now, we could have avoided a whole lot of things
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Billings Gazette)
 
 
 
Hardin, Montana completed a new jail in 2007 that is still empty, and they want to fill it with Gitmo detainees. Which begs the question, who the hell builds a jail they didn't need in the first place?
source: billingsgazette.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Circus tells clown he can't wear oversized shoes because of health concerns. "It's a real balancing act."
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Protip: If you're the Head of a school and you send 61 students home in one day for uniform violations, make sure your own Facebook page doesn't have a picture of you as a scruffy teenager
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this complex Klein bottle
source: neatorama.cachefly.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
CDC adds arborists to list of most dangerous jobs. Next year's crop of 'reality' shows to include Xtreme Arborists, Tougher in Trees
source: blogs.usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu April 23, 2009
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Now PTA Moms are getting in on the schoolboy fun, brought to you by Baldwin, NY
source: newstimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Don't you hate it when you go to the dentist to have a few teeth pulled and you drop dead a few hours later?
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CO Springs Gazette)
 
 
 
Would you rather be chased by a bear or hit by a car? One pregnant lady didn't have to choose
source: gazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Policewoman admits to using Jedi mind tricks during interviews with suspects: "I have even started calling my probationer, as a joke, my Padawan. Although I am not sure he likes that" (bonus: She's cute)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Director of Nebraska CSI accused of planting evidence in murder investigation. YEEEEAAAAHHHHHH
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gulf-Times)
 
 
 
Ugly-ass "mysterious figure" spotted by woman who managed to take a picture, despite being terribly frightened: " it suddenly disappeared out of their sight" (with creepy pic)
source: gulf-times.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Sign on I-5 says "Bear Left". They're not kidding
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Latest media-created "trend" is women leaving their husband or boyfriend for a woman: "Lately, a new kind of sisterly love seems to be in the air"
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Dead Uncle)
 
 
 
Photoshop this 1956 Disneyland Showboat Revue
source: i205.photobucket.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
Having solved all other problems, Alabama House passes resolution praising Miss California USA. No, she still won't sleep with you
source: blog.al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
New resident in The White House has a foot fetish. No, not him. No, not her either
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
Ad aimed at increasing Alberta tourism uses picture of a British beach. "There's no attempt to make people think that this is Alberta". Wait...what?
source: canada.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Australia's Miss Universe contest, which calls itself an event that promotes "healthy, proportioned bodies," allows a bag of antlers to become a finalist
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SanDiego UnionTribune)
 
 
 
Entomologist dies in avocado grove accident. Holy Guacamole
source: www3.signonsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Meet Britain's youngest female funeral director: she's hotter than a crematorium and has a body to die for
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
Iowa may pass law making it easier to purchase alcohol in rural areas. And honestly, if you're in a rural area in Iowa, there's really nothing to do but drink and have sex, and it's not always easy to get the second without the first
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Millions of people jobless. Billions of dollars in bailouts. Trillions of dollars in U.S. debt. And yet, for the first time in years, more Americans than not say the country is on the right track
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Four magic words: Naked Wizard Taser Brawl. The reviews are in and it's already being called, "The best Tasering video since 'Don't Tase me bro'"(Totally Not safe for work)
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Pennsylvanians get to do something they've never done before: Buy a six-pack at a grocery store. Said a customer, "This is so civilized"
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
"Disabled friendly" parking meters so low to ground that normal people need to get on their knees to feed them. Bonus: Wheelchair people also hate them
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Article asks, "Can Iraqis tweet their way to a state of normalcy?" 5:12 a.m., bombs dropped, wall fell in onto my extended family and they're dead. Toilet saved, tho... will be pooping in 5 minutes
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Couple living near Camp Ripley in Minnesota would really like an 'I'm sorry' after army includes them on list of artillery range targets (pic)
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Vaginas with teeth? Genitals are connected to your nose? Sewing machines cause lesbianism? Masturbation shrinks boobies? Your mom's a whore? It's as likely as you think
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
If you're an adult driving around with a teen girl sleeping in your backseat, the last thing you want cops to find when they pull you over is a picture of you kissing the girl and a home pregnancy test
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Indian tribe seeking restitution for lands lost in the 1800s. They plan to Sioux
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Bristol Palin's ex says he may go to court for custody of their son, Tripp -- which is eskimo for "hey will you please beat me up?"
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
As a rule of thumb, just assume that everyone you plan to punch in the face in a fit of road rage is an off-duty police chief
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Rodeo star accused of performing equine dentistry without a license. You heard it straight from the horse's mouth
source: koco.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Whale protection research vessel collides with endangered whale. Officials say blubbering would serve no porpoise - it was just a fluke, and they've made the best out of a bad cetacean
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Nanny State gives convicted violent criminals community sentences full of such punishment as fly-fishing trips and gardening lessons rather than just stick them somewhere unpleasant, like jail
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Chewing gum can make you smarter, thinner, fix the economy and bring peace to the Middle East. So says a study from the Wrigley Science Institute
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Scientific American)
 
 
 
Forget global warming, food shortages are going to kill off civilization long before then anyway
source: sciam.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
TV station plans special report on child abduction by driving slowly around in an SUV and seeing if kids walking home from school will approach the vehicle when reporters call out to them. Hilarity does not ensue
source: minnesota.publicradio.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
Iowa's marriage saga continues as judges realize they don't have to grant same-sex marriages... as long as they don't grant any marriages whatsoever. "It's not discrimination if you refuse to do it for everyone"
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Foobies)
 
 
 
Terrorists free 77 year old german tourist after three months, but not before stealing her face
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IndyStar)
 
 
 
Not wanting to waste their time with a lemonade stand, two fifth-graders arrested for selling weed at their elementary school
source: indystar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Maineiac)
 
 
 
If you're pulled over for a missing front plate and the cop asks if he can search your vehicle, it's ok to say no. Especially if you have a pound and a half of weed in the trunk
source: morningsentinel.mainetoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Lock And Weir)
 
 
 
Photoshop this sluice gate raiser-upper chap
source: pla.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
British couple have a Shrek cosplay wedding. With "what a couple of Farquaads" pic
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
Dangerous cougar that attacked four people has been caught. Will be fitted with a tracking device and released into the wild
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Foobies)
 
 
 
Beer brewing like the mothers of old...in your backyard
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTMJ)
 
 
 
Wisconsin school district sued over holding its graduations at area megachurch. Jonah the Jew, Muhammad the Muslim, here's your diploma. Now burn in hell
source: 620wtmj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"Hey dad, where is the sugar?" "Oh, it's right there in the cupboard next to the Rottweiler"
source: dogmagazine.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Old and busted: hookups in singles bars and discos. New hotness: hookups on a Twister mat and building Jenga towers
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Craigslist CEO: "I would not describe any section of our site as sex-related"
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Unknown person leaves a live shark outside a newspaper office. You read about this on the internet
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Before there were iPod-wearing, introverted Emos, there were Boombox-toting idiots who blasted their stuff to the entire neighborhood. BONUS: Boombox gallery included
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hawk Eye)
 
 
 
"Happy 420" graffiti discovered at high school. Principal: "I just heard this afternoon that it was, like, national pot day. I had never heard that before."
source: thehawkeye.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Auto-tune the news. Couric rocks the beat
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
To honor Earth Day, Jones Soda company powered its headquarters entirely by cycle power. Suck it, Gilligan
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this trusting trooper
source: s.wsj.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
"Fox Stands on Hind Legs Like a Dog." Okay, it's balanced -- but is it fair?
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Bad: Daughter racks up large phone bill. Good: Parents force daughter to repay the bill by working. Fark: As a prostitute
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dallas News)
 
 
 
Mother successfully defeats school dress code requiring tucked-in shirts. Her reason? The Bible requires modesty, and a tucked in shirt reveals a bottom
source: dallasnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Training manual for Chinese police leaked online and yes, it's about as frightening as you'd assume
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 207: "Frankly My Deer, I Don't Give a Dam" Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed April 22, 2009
(PennLive)
 
 
 
High school student whips out his penis during English class, begins masturbating furiously while screaming the names of his classmates. Sounds like someone's been watching a little too much Daffy Duck
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MIT Technology Review)
 
 
 
Better beer through bioengineering? To the laboratory
source: technologyreview.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Protip: If you're going to use your job at the state tax department to steal taxpayers' identities, it's not a good idea to leave 2000 Post-It notes around the house detailing your targets' finances
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
You may want to think about getting a divorce if your wife beats you so much, you have to use a taser to make her stop
source: news-journalonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCBStv.com)
 
 
 
Forget the fact that she'll rip your face off and eat it like a slop-sloppy joe, the cutest and newest addition to the Bronx Zoo making her public debut today
source: wcbstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Quaker parrots knock out electricity. HA HA
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
If you're going to watch a movie involving screams and gunshots, make sure the volume isn't maxed out and your window isn't open for your neighbors to hear, as they might suspect you're killing someone inside
source: baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Miss California may have grounds for a discrimination lawsuit against the Miss USA, thanks to Flamey McBloggy Attent-o-whorey-pants
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Photoshop this Indian man at the polls
source: msnbcmedia.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Police chief: "Yeah, umm, sorry about arresting that autistic kid. We thought he was drunk"
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Sixth case of measles detected in DC metro area outbreak. Outlook is spotty
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Colorado lawmakers to make seatbelt violations a primary traffic offence in order to get $20 million fro ... sorry, To Make Roads Safer
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Nola.com)
 
 
 
Protip: If you get kicked out of a library for looking at porn, don't stand around outside leering at kids while holding "a notebook with a listing of children's names next to descriptions of sexual acts"
source: blog.nola.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Knock, knock. Who's there? Stabby. Stabby who--owwww
source: 10news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Worst. Logo. Ever
source: andrewsullivan.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Tennessean)
 
 
 
After getting beat up by a homeless man when she tried to give him a cheeseburger, woman does the logical thing and sues a nearby McDonald's and a liquor store. "I told him he was an ungrateful bastard"
source: tennessean.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Sparrow uses lit cigarette to build its nest, causes £250,000 house fire (pics)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Today's teen sexting kerfuffle brought to you by the small Pennsylvania town of Tunkhannock where the progressive DA threatened to label an 11 year old girl a pedophile because someone sent a photo of her wearing a *gasp* bathing suit
source: online.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Evil stare of the beast of Bodmin captured on film, scaring a Cornish town couple: "This is not the sort of animal you would expect to find roaming in the countryside" (with pic)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
Crocodiles on a plane: "two of them broke their head-ropes and began thrashing around. The plane was shaking. The pilot was turning and raising his eyebrows"
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
It's bad enough when the police kick down your door while you're out, but when they send you a bill for the damages, that's just rude
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
Woman who bought $900,000 condo in new Chicago Trump Tower upset that law firm's lights shine through her window; things could be worse, it could be a Kenny Rogers Roasters restaurant next door
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Philadelphia Bulletin)
 
 
 
While you celebrate Earth Day, say a word of thanks to its co-founder Ira Einhorn, whose other achievement was killing his girlfriend and hiding her decomposing corpse inside the wall of his apartment for 18 months before fleeing to France
source: thebulletin.us   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Quad City Times)
 
 
 
Retired Vietnam soldier turned gravedigger explains the significance of burying soldiers killed in action
source: qctimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Teacher sends a 5-year-old home with a bag of poop. "This little turd was on the floor in my room"
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Journal-Star)
 
 
 
"...a stripper allegedly used a vibrator to anally penetrate a fraternity pledge during an initiation party." She can't do that to our pledges Only we can do that to our pledges
source: journalstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
TARP wife complains about not wanting to be "spotted climbing into a taxi, laden with Bergdorf Goodman shopping bags" Won't somebody think of the TARP wives???
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
British man defies "Supersize Me" documentary, eats McDonald's for 30 days and claims to have lost 15lbs: "There is good food in almost any restaurant you go in to"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Teacher/student sex suspect gets off on a technicality, teenage boys
source: wbaltv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
Now listen up people -- just because there's a new President in office, doesn't mean you can bring chain saws, guns, snakes or fireworks on planes
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
Woman drives to random coffee shops in Edmonton to hand out $100 bills to strangers. "Happy spring"
source: edmontonjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop Challenge: What other items should the Octomom sell under her new trademark?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC Action News)
 
 
 
Man attacks cops with medieval battle ax, dagger and broad sword. No cleric needed, level 12 Elf Warrior unavailable for comment
source: abcactionnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Hijacked train released in India after demands to be rerouted to Cuba are denied
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
Once again, apparently some of you missed the memo: hiding in your soon-to-be-ex-wife's trunk then biting her elbow while she drives will NOT win her back
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
If you can tell the difference between fabric conditioner and milk, there's a nurse in a British hospital who could do with some remedial classes
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
US now charging a 100% tariff for Italian bottled water as a revenge for the EU ban on US beef. Because it's always a great idea to screw with Italians
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Televangelist Joel Osteen and his hot Stepford wife rent Yankee Stadium for $1.5 million so he can preach on Saturday, gets 10% discount for performing exorcism on right field wall
source: lohud.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCBS 880)
 
 
 
The acting head of Freddie Mac, David Kellerman, has committed suicide
source: wcbs880.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Somalia to U.S.: "Hey can you help us set up a pseudo-military group of people who weren't good enough to get into real branches of the military --- um....how do you say.....'Coast Guard'? "
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lancashire Evening Post)
 
 
 
There is now a black hole both inside and outside the UK treasury
source: lep.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
If you're a strict Christian and don't believe in sex before marriage, the ideal place to work is obviously.....a strip club
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Virginia parking meter repairman steals $170,000, or over 4 tons worth of coins, in under a year. That's change we can believe in
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"The two thought about calling 911 when they heard gunshots but started making out instead"
source: blog.seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Nola.com)
 
 
 
Judge rules KKK Imperial Wizard's son is too stupid to stand trial for murder with his dad. Behold, the master race
source: blog.nola.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
World piracy doubles in first quarter 2009 due to Somalia. Still no cure for Tropic of Cancer
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Man survives three days lost in the Arctic, makes it home by riding on the backs of polar bears seeking icebergs
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC2News Baltimore)
 
 
 
Experts warn of more "familicides", which is the murder of an entire family by a family member. EVERYBODY PANIC
source: abc2news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(San Bernardino Sun)
 
 
 
Police raid on skinheads leads to maternity wards where pregnant "Aryan Princesses" sought to induce labor on Hitler's birthday
source: sbsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
Ugly-ass baby roo, after being abandoned by its mother, is being nursed by three countries (w/ugly-ass pic)
source: spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Man sues after being hit in the head with a discus. Says he faces hurdles daily and has now hired a P.R. firm to track and field calls from the media. The bar is set high, but he thinks he can win his case. Javelin
source: seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSL)
 
 
 
Got a brain tumor? No problem, just sting yourself with a scorpion
source: ksl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Mexican drug cartel leader asks members to avoid heavy drinking, narcotics and lead a "clean family life"
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
City's IT director denies downloading 24,466 porn images onto his office computer, and he definately didn't organize everything into directories
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Argus)
 
 
 
If a blue painted Smurf is coming at you with a metal baseball bat it probably means he doesn't want to be friends
source: theargus.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
"Police say a man dressed liked a ninja used a sword in an attempt to rob a Weymouth dry cleaner"
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Doctors tell woman 'sorry, you'll just have to go blind' because she has the wrong postal code
source: dailyexpress.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this perpendicular pilot
source: s.wsj.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS13.com - CBS Sacramento)
 
 
 
California county will now charge marijuana growers for the cost of destroying the seized plants, apparently unaware that there are millions of people who would do it for them for free
source: cbs13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Two men turn love of bacon into job: "Everything should taste like bacon; that's the motto"
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue April 21, 2009
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Women go to work like men go to war: "The average woman's handbag contains a make-up bag, a camera phone, a diary, a book or magazine, an umbrella, an iPod and a hairbrush, plus painkillers, a wallet and hand cream"
source: dailyexpress.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
To the surprise of absolutely nobody, the bank bailout may be susceptible to catastrophic fraud
source: finance.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
If you are going to make a sign for Lake Chargoggagoggmanchauggagogg chaubunagungamaugg, don't spell it Chargoggagoggmanchaoggagogg chaubunaguhgamaugg
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vancouver Sun)
 
 
 
ER staff call ambulance for unconscious man...10 feet from ER, "That's asinine" (actual quote)
source: vancouversun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Woman calls 911, fakes miscarriage using animal tissue. Won't someone think of the fake children?
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Many modern women lack good manners and are also foul-mouthed, loud and uncultured. "Maybe men are at fault"
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Twelve year old boy is not only in college already, he's double majoring and has a 3.83 GPA, no chance of ever getting laid
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Sparks Tribune)
 
 
 
Ok, let's go over this again. If you're a preacher who drives a Bentley and owns multiple luxury homes, at least make an attempt to pay your taxes
source: charlotteobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Billings Gazette)
 
 
 
If you're going to steal $7000 worth of computers and iPods from the Wal-Mart you work at, don't post those items for sale on the employee bulletin board at that same Wal-Mart
source: billingsgazette.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
In case it wasn't obvious to everybody, when Kellogg says eating Mini-Wheats will improve your attentiveness by 20%, there might be slightly inaccurate science at play here
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
The results of this breakdancing study just in. File under: "things we all knew 25 years ago"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Five hour police standoff ends when police discover suspect isn't home
source: kptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ntnews)
 
 
 
Mother of three is witness of UFO sighting, has irrefutable proofs of alien-life thanks to her mobile phone: "Those aliens - they must have some pretty good airconditioning in those things" (with pic)
source: ntnews.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Idaho judge known for interpreting the law in a literal manner takes on the meaning of "gag order", applies duct tape liberally
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
If you get caught grabbing girl's breast in the subway, "It's a free country" is unlikely to work your way in court
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop Theme: Rejected PBS shows (LGTE)
source: spin.8233design.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
I'll be taking these Huggies, and whatever cash ya got
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC Action News)
 
 
 
If you're going to do the old 'hairspray flamethrower' trick, it may be wise to do it outside
source: abcactionnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Today, the United States Supreme Court has overruled the infamous Belton case. What that means to all you non-lawyers, is that the police may now need a warrant to search your car
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
"A new pro al-Qaeda magazine for extremists is offering fitness tips to jihadists planning attacks against Americans"
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Today's special legal tip: if you're on trial for sexual assault, try to avoid using the phrase "When women become hysterical, it is necessary sometimes to slap them to bring them round"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Don't you hate it when your boss shows up at your wedding and announces she slept with the groom (w/ picture of the happy trio)
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Woman sends stripper to high school reunion in her place
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
Earthquake in Alabama. Y'ALL PANIC
source: blog.al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
Not news: 19 year old girl passes out in back of boyfriends car. News: Car is stolen with girlfriend still in it. Fark: Police find girl in car hours after it was stolen, still passed out
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
"Culberson admitted to tying his own hands and feet, and inventing the suspects' vehicle and weapon descriptions that he gave to sheriff's deputies in an attempt to make his girlfriend feel bad for leaving him" (mugshot)
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
When your state is 49th in the nation for education, what do you do? Lay off 4,000 teachers of course
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
An American breaks back in the top 25 for the FBI's most wanted terrorist list. USA USA USA
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Iranian sniper or Wookiee? How to tell them apart
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Protip: Don't chew tobacco while doing a robbery, some of that CSI stuff is actually true
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Stephen Hawking expected to make a full recovery. Well, not a "full" recovery, per se, but you get the point
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Carrie Prejean: You said that your answer that you're against gay marriage cost you the Miss USA crown. How has your life changed? "Well, I got 500 Facebook friend requests."
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Parents can't believe they would be arrested for barging into school's medical room or chaining themselves to school railings. I could not believe it when the school wanted us charged with trespassing"
source: eveningtimes.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
It's only Tuesday, but we already have the Mug Shot of The Week
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
Just like with drivers, some think bicyclists should have to take exams and pay fees
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Restaurant owner's gas bill jumps from $700 to $50,000 in one month. Gas company, "That sounds about right". When the TV investigative reporters asked, the gas company was all, "OOPS, our bad"
source: cbsatlanta.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Police: "Hello sir, sorry to interrupt your vacation but there are 20 underage kids drinking in your house and your son wont let us in. May we enter?" Parent: "STFU and go away" Police: "Ok, have a nice day"
source: newsblog.projo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Dog named Porterhouse wins the 2009 "Beautiful Bulldog" pageant, beating out another dog who made some unfortunate comments about gay marriage
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WMTW.com)
 
 
 
What appears to be Jesus wearing a spacesuit has appeared on a man's guitar, but it's nothing to fret about
source: wmtw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Kenyan sect violence kills 24. Submitter thought it would be the crappy writing that finally ended the series
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Due to the terrible economy, Harvard career services officials are faced with an unprecedented problem: teaching Harvard graduates how to deal with rejection and failure
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
AAA survey finds 50% of drivers speed on major highways, speed on residential streets, speed up to beat a yellow light, honk at other drivers and tailgate, other 50% lie to AAA researchers
source: wsbradio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
In these days of debauchery and loose morals, one woman takes a stand against the greatest threat to our society: naked garden gnomes
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Bad news for those of you who continue to use plastic grocery bags just for the joy of spiting hippies
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
MOTY candidate throws glass table at children, threatens them with butcher knife because the little ingrates didn't say I love you
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LBC 97.3)
 
 
 
"This is not the first time a viewer has contacted us after discovering maggots in their box of Nestle Goobers"
source: wtsp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
NYT columnist on the art of headlines. Obviously, he has never visited Fark.com
source: fish.blogs.nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Register Citizen)
 
 
 
Man goes back to jail under new repeat offender law ... for violating probation by entering girlfriend's house, with permission, to use the bathroom
source: registercitizen.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Former car salesman explains how women are treated by car dealerships ("They are preyed upon, and are easy targets.") and how to avoid being scammed
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this balancing of balls
source: img-fotki.yandex.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Moms debate over what age is the right age to let your child watch 'Star Wars.' "One bar scene features 'space' drinking, smoking, and shady characters"
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
New England prostitutes are free to ply their trade once more as the Craigslist Killer is brought to justice. Bonus: Perp was a BU med student who was researching hormones
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lohud.com)
 
 
 
Meh: Mom sick of her daughters' fighting kicks them out of the car. Nanny-state: And is arrested (there's a mugshot). Fark facepalmy goodness: Helpful passer-by turned mom in and bought one of the little hellions ice cream
source: lohud.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
If you feel bad about robbing a bank, there are better ways to show your remorse than by stabbing your arm and writing "I'm sorry" on a car's window with your blood
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Scotland's kilts are in a bunch as the best Scotch in the world is distilled in Japan. Domo arigato
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Scientists discover that the Great Wall of China has grown by 3850 km. Mongols will still just go around it
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ohio.com)
 
 
 
A 52-year-old woman who became a stripper to make ends meet gets stabbed in the eye with a stilletto heel on her first day at work by a jealous co-worker (in her late 40's). "We don't need any more dancers around here"
source: ohio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Australian man in New Zealand bans the entire town from his motel because they keep trashing the place. Like, they'll leave him alone now, hey bro?
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this shadowy young man from a shadowy planet
source: img-fotki.yandex.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Former NASA astronaut says mankind is not alone in the universe. He checked
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon April 20, 2009
(Breitbart.com)
 
 
 
It DOES stand for Female Body Inspectors
source: breitbart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Unemployed college grad turns down job interviews, continues roadside sign-wearing campaign. "So if he can't have the ideal job, ideal hours, ideal pay, then he'll just sit around and be a victim?"
source: articles.lancasteronline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KNBC 4 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
You think you know grilled cheese, but you have no idea
source: nbclosangeles.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this bear trap
source: upload.wikimedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSBY-6)
 
 
 
If some woman drove her Jetta off a cliff near Big Sur three days ago, let her go, because, man, she's... wait, never mind, that's her climbing back to the road (updated link)
source: ksby.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Protesters want riot police to wear NFL-style 'shirt numbers' so they can identify them when they dish out savage beatings
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Virginia unveils its newest tool to reduce speed on the roads... Zig-zag lines
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Not News: Man taken to hospital for second degree burns. News: On his crotch. Fark: From stuffing cash bundled with exploding dye packs down his pants
source: abclocal.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KPHO)
 
 
 
Middle school principal bans 14-year-old from wearing rainbow wristband because that's just gay
source: kpho.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
If you're being interviewed for national television, please try and avoid claiming that gays are all child molesters, it might just go down the wrong way
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
Consumerist shows you how to identify an "ATM skimmer" used by thieves to steal your PIN and other personal information. With pics of it on and off
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
NPR celebrates 4/20 by imagining what it would be like if marijuana was legal
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Globe and Mail)
 
 
 
Canadian McDonald's borrows a page from the socialized health care system, starts giving away free coffee, no strings attached and take as much you want, between now and May 3
source: theglobeandmail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
A world without ant sex, layoff greeting cards and a crotch glove for sale: Headlines of the Week 4/12 to 4/18
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
New 'peronality map' of United Kingdom proves once and for all that Scotland is, as often described, a "strange, little, wet, fried, angry place"
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Solar superstorm expected to blow us back to the dark ages in just three years, so start backing up your files now
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Newest trend flying off the shelf? Push-up pants for men
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
Supreme Court has turned away a challenge from a death row inmate in Texas who claimed his constitutional rights were violated by jurors who consulted a Bible during deliberations
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
Man stabs another guy because the victim let his girlfriend go to the bathroom. "Diaz explained that when he drinks with his friends he's not allowed to speak about what happens"
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Homestar Runner)
 
 
 
You got the willz, the skillz, for flamin' lay-up drills
source: homestarrunner.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
In latest sign that apocalypse is all but upon us, Canadians are drinking less beer
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
"Bernanke: People need to hone financial know-how". You mean, like Wall St. people?
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this high flyer
source: bp2.blogger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tucson Citizen)
 
 
 
You know that picture of you on all fours with your right arm in Arizona, your left arm in Arizona, your right foot in Arizona and your left foot in Arizona?
source: tucsoncitizen.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Circumcision is something the U.S. does and Europe doesn't and is therefore awesome. Our penises are clean and sleek and new like Frank Gehry skyscrapers, while theirs are crumbling, ancient edifices inhabited by fat old men in hats
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
The Wrath of Fark
source: weblogs.baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Stephen Hawking rushed to hospital. Doctors fear he may never walk again
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
April 20, 1999: 'Columbine: We will never forget.' April 20, 2009: 'Columbine'? What's a 'Columbine'?
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Susan Boyle singing now the most-viewed online video in history. Or at least until a video of Susan Boyle singing and then getting kicked in the balls appears
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Computer makeover shows criminals after 30 years in prison as a warning to young people to avoid a life of crime
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
City forced to refund traffic fines paid by 10,000 motorists after ticketed driver points out warning sign was missing one word
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
Baltimore is charging 1,200% annual interest on unpaid parking tickets. Naturally, someone has a problem with this
source: baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Thousands of dolphins block Somali pirates from attacking ship. Snorky unavailable for comment
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Obama administration rattles the sabre at Eritrea, telling the dictatorship to stop supporting Islamic terrorists or we'll go unilateral on its ass
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
British government tells teenagers to go ahead and use drugs, possibly to help them deal with the fact that they're British teenagers
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
The trouble with shooting a police radar van operator parked by the side of the highway is you can pretty much guarantee he's going to have already taken a picture of your car
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Failblog)
 
 
 
Swimmer finds himself in a ballsack conundrum, so very scared. Yes, it has happened again
source: failblog.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Miss USA 2009 is Miss North Carolina, who looks ecstatic to have discovered maps and like such as
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Politician)
 
 
 
Caption Beloved Leader of British Columbia Gordon Campbell in a spongecube pit
source: a123.g.akamai.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
British MILF teacher fired after sex with which person? (a) studmuffin at work; (b) underage boy in class; (c) convicted murderer at jail in which she offered "one on one tutorials"
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
If your cunning getaway plan involves taking a taxi home from the scene of your last burglary, it helps a lot you pick a taxi whose driver doesn't live in that house
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: When Google owns the world
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
You're sailing towards freedom but the country won't grant you asylum? Why, just set your boat on fire
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Fourteen horses die right before Florida polo match. It was a biatch getting them out of the pool
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FOX)
 
 
 
British spy agency searching for real-life "Q"; subby searching for real-life Octopussy
source: fox40.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Suburban news)
 
 
 
C-blocked by the fuzz? Dial 911 and report shots fired elsewhere. Bonus mugshot hilarity
source: suburbanchicagonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kansas City)
 
 
 
Kenyan in Leavenworth for 13 years on an expired student visa refuses to go home. he always manages to "cover himself in his own excrement" when it's time to go to the airport
source: kansascity.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man steals box of mood rings. If only there was some sort of device that could help me gauge how I feel about this story
source: journalstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FOX)
 
 
 
Mon takes hostages in Jamaican airport
source: fox40.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lehigh Valley Live)
 
 
 
"When I get hungry... I stick my head in my own fridge scouring for food. I don't break into my neighbor's house and raid their pantry. Seems like someone had a major case of the munchies. PS: This has Fark written all over it"
source: lehighvalleylive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
The goggles, they do nothing
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
Dumbass: using your infant's diaper bag in Wal-Mart to steal $178.00 worth of stuff. Asinine: running away and leaving the infant at Wal-Mart
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
If you have an issue with an ATM, just camp out all the night by the machine
source: weinterrupt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TwinCities.com)
 
 
 
Idiot who climbed onto bridge over Minnesota River and pretended to fall to impress his friends ... well, you probably know where this is going. And where he ended up
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 

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