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Sun April 19, 2009
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this person picking
source: s.wsj.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(Some Guy in stiches)
 
 
 
"Honey, clear the table and bring me your sewing kit. I'm gonna fix these blasted hemorrhoids once and for all"
source: houstonpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(Some Quick-stepper)
 
 
 
Word of diarrhea vaccine leaked to paper
source: woodtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(135)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Marine flies across the country with explosives in his checked luggage, only to be discovered when the airline screws up and has to rescreen. Bonus: charged with possession of an infernal machine
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(Livingston Daily)
 
 
 
Please don't flash your genitals at the Comcast repair man
source: livingstondaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(KnoxNews)
 
 
 
Sorry guys...she's taken
source: knoxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(233)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
"When you think of the beautiful natural world, do you think, "I want the environment to be as clean as my vagina." No? Well, maybe you should"
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(105)
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
Man in wheelchair dies after being hit by bus; man was in wheelchair because he was previously hit by bus
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(93)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Collection agency is in ur myspace, lookin for ur daddy's Mercedes
source: lolfed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(175)
 
(Herald Tribune (SW Florida))
 
 
 
Five police agencies dispatched after woman reports abduction of little girl. Unfortunately she got some details wrong
source: heraldtribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(156)
 
(Buffalo News)
 
 
 
News: Student beaten at school, rushed into surgery. Fark: Administrator defended not calling the police saying "at the time of the incident, the administrators didn't know a crime had been committed"
source: buffalonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(93)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Drinking water may have all sorts of drugs like lithium and nitroglycerin dumped in. You'd think we'd be an awful lot healthier, wouldn't you?
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(Telegram)
 
 
 
Today's catching fish in a barrel story is from Worcester, Mass were 50 people are arrested in a Craigslist sex sting
source: telegram.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(106)
 
(Some Sleeping Dog)
 
 
 
Singing dog alarm clock features paws button, is a mutt's have, inspires awful puns
source: inventorspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(OK Magazine)
 
 
 
Cheeky baby macaque plays hide and seek with his mother...causing nearby monkey to burst out laughing [pics]
source: ok.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(E! Online)
 
 
 
"Exactly when does 'food' move from the 'bizarre' category to 'sorry, but that's just a foul, disgusting hunk of crap that shouldn't come anywhere near the human mouth?'"
source: eonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(206)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
University students? Check. Thousands of cute bunnies? Check. Explosive gas? Check. Outrage and indignation? Oh, you betcha
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(122)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
North Dakota National Guard reinforces dam near LaMoure last night. After midnight, using one-ton sandbags brought in with helicopters. So have a nice day, and sleep with a life preserver tonight
source: dvidshub.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
The most arrogant 12-year-old in the world says he'd like to meet Michael Jackson so that the two can "compare notes" on performing (some site ads NSFW)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this bear-suited biker
source: s.wsj.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(Tampa Bay Online)
 
 
 
Christians urged to go green for God. And this time they don't mean just cash
source: www2.tbo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(316)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Another sign of the bad economy: Penny slot machines paying off
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
The most ridiculous reader comment in the history of the known universe
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(293)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Supreme Court will decide if it's okay for the school principal to look in your underwear for aspirin
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(259)
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
The speech Nixon would have made if Neil Armstrong had died on the moon
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(234)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
British governments attempt to beat recession by hiring people for bizarre non-jobs, including ceremonial sword-bearer, roller disco coach and tooth-brushing advisor for babies
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(First Coast News)
 
 
 
Students protest in support of cheerleader coach fired for posing nude in Playboy. Surprisingly, they were all female
source: firstcoastnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(238)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Twenty firefighters and two hovercraft combine for dramatic river rescue of seven. Officials say that all seven are doing well and are back in the pasture grazing peacefully. Wait, what?
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
If you're looking for a job and are willing to relocate, pick up a cowboy hat, some boots and get ready to act arrogant about your new superiority as a Texan
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(229)
 
(Springfield News-Leader)
 
 
 
Barbie is 50? That's nothing - the Kewpie doll turns 100. Doesn't look a day over... a day old
source: news-leader.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
"America's Underinsured Are Swelling." Isn't there something they can take for that?
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(187)
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Congratulations. Effective this past Thursday, you're Canadian. Don't believe me? Ask the moose, the hockey player at the foot of your bed, and the Mountie at your door
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Photoshop this eggman
source: inapcache.boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(News Of The World)
 
 
 
If you happen to have a spare $300k lying around, you could buy your very own Oscar-winning nine-year old
source: newsoftheworld.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(101)
 
(ABC Action News)
 
 
 
Man, who won $3.3-million lottery jackpot returns to farm life he grew up in, by opening nude dude ranch
source: abcactionnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
You can sin in Baghdad again. Mission accomplished
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(126)
 
(eagle tribune)
 
 
 
Guy breaks into this woman's home and makes himself lunch. He figured she wouldn't mind because he dressed in his best tennis outfit
source: eagletribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Woman angers Zeus, who smites her and sends her falling 300 feet to her death on Mt. Olympus
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these sinks
source: af.mil   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(Lexington Herald Leader)
 
 
 
Nude and armed with a toilet seat? That's a tazerin'
source: kentucky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Except for Tara Reid and hard-core alcoholics who pour it into their water bottles at work, vodak is out. What's in for cocktails? Gin, mezcal and drinks made with elderflower liqueur
source: online.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(228)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
UN implements their state of the art catch and release system to show the world the proper way of handling the piracy problem
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(197)
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
Wok overheats and burns down sex shop. Number 69 off the menu
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 


Sat April 18, 2009
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
♫ The Love Padlock is a little ol' place where ♫ We can get crushed by YEEEEARRRRRGH ♫
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
What's the first thing you think of when your fiance suddenly drops dead of a heart attack? If you answered "save the sperm," you win a free babby
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Chavez and Obama exchange handshake, high fives and fistbumps. No word on when they'll upgrade to the fish slap dance
source: uk.reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(447)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
In these trying economic times, one Australian city has the solution. And that solution is wombat crap
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(LiveLeak)
 
Video
 
When the police are about to give you a roadside breath test, you really, really shouldn't do what this guy does
source: liveleak.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(111)
 
(Scotsman)
 
 
 
Distilleries bottling whiskies earlier to appeal to younger drinkers, who dislike the 'whiskey' taste that so many single malts have
source: scotlandonsunday.scotsman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(338)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Peoria man smokes his house and nearly waxes his wife while making scented candles in the garage
source: abclocal.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(AOL)
 
 
 
New way to make fast cash: Wander into a restaurant, ask customers if they are ready to pay their check, take $ and leave. TA DA
source: news.aol.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Associated Press details all current Somali pirate hijackings. It's official: pirates are this year's shark attacks
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
Photoshop this affected actor
source: spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Study shows Viagra, Cialis don't damage men's vision: There's just no way you're going to poke your own eye out
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(My Fox Orlando)
 
 
 
Rule #1 of rescuing someone who is drowning: make sure you can swim
source: myfoxorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(Tacoma News Tribune)
 
 
 
Pimping ain't easy, especially when you're a soldier and the girls are teenagers
source: thenewstribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(134)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
It doesn't matter whether you're a war reporter, a world famous explorer or a round the world yachtsman, you still need to fill out an eight page health and safety assessment before the BBC will let you light a portable stove
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Vietnamese immigrants forced to live in neglected, decaying housing; say no matter what, they just can't Nguyen
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(io9)
 
 
 
A review Farkers can get behind: "'Crank 2' is an epic of sleazy Darwinism" (contains spoilers)
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(140)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
American man inadvertently turns his wife British by shooting her in the head
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(Salem News)
 
 
 
If at first you don't succeed, maybe you shouldn't try to rob the same place again
source: salemnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(7)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Martin Luther King, Jr's children are shaking down the MLK Memorial Foundation for a $1 million "licensing fee" to print excerpts of his speech on the monument
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(181)
 
(Diss Express)
 
 
 
Police investigating the body parts found across Britain believe the victim "may have been overweight". Although they do add "You'd be overweight too if you had five arms and three heads"
source: dissexpress.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(16)
 
(Blip.tv)
 
 
 
It's amazing the kinds of things 30 young women can do with enough rope
source: soonereyo.blip.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(97)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Being near a child and making him feel uncomfortable will now get you questioned by the police
source: wrcbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(167)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
The average wine drinker may as well be eating 184 bags of potato chips per month, according to mathematically challenged journalist
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(103)
 
(Jacksonville.com)
 
 
 
These are the adventures of the Starship Farragut. Where many men have gone before
source: jacksonville.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(165)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Thieves take cement mixer and industrial compressor from construction site. Cops hoping to put the squeeze on these hardened criminals
source: stirlingobserver.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(14)
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
If your neighbors oppose your property rezoning request, what better way to express your displeasure than to blast German marching music 24/7 while goosestepping around your yard giving Nazi salutes?
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Iran clones goat. If they clone a camel, they can have sex ed and driver's ed on the same days
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(112)
 
(Some Digger)
 
 
 
Theme: archaeological discoveries from the ancient American civilization of the early 21st Century (LGT example)
source: bozz.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(press-citizen.com)
 
 
 
Cats put their best paw forward for Caturday with their routine as "Circus Cats of Chicago"
source: press-citizen.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(425)
 
(Lincoln Journal Star)
 
 
 
"Riley was searched at the jail, where corrections officers found a baggie containing a white powdery substance in his rectum. According to the report, Riley quickly grabbed the baggie and tried to chew it." Talk about good shiat
source: journalstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall stops by your seedy tavern to use the restroom and have a sloe gin. Clearly, your next course of action is to rip off the toilet seat and put it on Ebay
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Tired of vandals tearing up a playing field, councilors enlist the help of a herd of Aberdeen Angus cows. Subby calls bullshiat
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Hooters waitresses subdue man hiding in their car. Man complained he had a conservative girlfriend and thought "they looked easy." Media promises to keep us abreast of further developments
source: wsbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(150)
 
(NBC 10 Providence)
 
 
 
Man arrested after calling 911 with phony bomb threats. "He said he wanted to see police and fire respond in real life. He watches a lot of TV and he wanted to see us respond"
source: turnto10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this Gemini giant
source: sjsu.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(The Times of India)
 
 
 
Chinese communist party gets upset because German condom company creates an ad showing Mao Zedong, Adolph Hitler and Osama bin Laden as sperm
source: timesofindia.indiatimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(99)
 
(Merced Sun-Star)
 
 
 
Female social worker accused of lending teen runaway a helping handjob (with mugshot)
source: mercedsunstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(88)
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
Bar posts Easter 'Sunday mass, get drunk off your ass' special. Surprisingly some people had a problem with this
source: weblogs.baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
"It appears that many correct submissions were, again, aided by sleuths from the Fark Army (of which we've long been members)"
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(104)
 


Fri April 17, 2009
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
DNA tests say Lincoln might have had cancer and died had Booth not gotten him first. So does this mean we have to give the holiday back?
source: wbbm780.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(141)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Empty pubs could get new lease on life by turning them into alcohol free-bars for teenagers with games, music, soft drinks and convenience food. Back in the days, we called those "arcades"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(106)
 
(Quad City Times)
 
 
 
Rockridge High school evacuated; cattle raped
source: qctimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(211)
 
(filemagazine.com)
 
 
 
Photoshop this policeman and percussionist
source: filemagazine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Playboy names University of Miami the top party school in the nation
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(137)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
62-year-old man sues police for making him walk home in polar bear pajamas
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(WPBeeF)
 
 
 
Jesus Christ it's bees, GET IN THE FIRE TRUCK
source: wpbf.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Big Picture goes to the zoo. Picture #33 is too cute for words
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(77)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Eight foot tall Chinese man soon to be named world's tallest man. Yao Ming weeps
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(KNBC 4 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Rich man meets woman on SeekingArrangement.com. What could go wrong? (w/hittable pic)
source: nbclosangeles.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(120)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
This week's TSG mugshot roundup: these are the kids your parents warned you about
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(273)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Karaoke bar posts sign announcing: "We are not a gay bar." Hilarity ensues
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(204)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Tourists from the U.S. need to fight the 'ugly American' stereotype. But how are we supposed to do that when people in most countries don't even speak American?
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(357)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Saplings from Anne Frank's tree to be planted in 10 US cities. Arbor macht tree
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(98)
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Nine universities recently received $45M from anonymous donor. Schools promise not to out the submitter
source: seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Michigan mayor asks for ticket after being given only a warning for speeding, says he didn't want there to be any favoritism
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(136)
 
(KUTV Utah)
 
 
 
White kids spared from embarrassment trying to dance to rap when Utah school cancels Glasses Malone performance at prom
source: kutv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
EPA finds greenhouse gases hazardous to health. And not in that "Al Gore, we all gonna die" way, but actually dangerous to people. Right now
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(502)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Get your cellphone stolen while backpacking in Peru? That'll be $24,000 please
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(201)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"Oh my God, I'm looking at a baby ... I didn't know my wife was pregnant ... There's like, baby poop all over his head. Ugh, disgusting"
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(214)
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
Gay marriage may be legal in Iowa, but that doesn't mean city clerks are going to violate their religious beliefs and process those license requests
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(703)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Two men shot dead at gun-control rally
source: thisislondon.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(153)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
"Our top story on CNN today, Ashton Kutcher has more friends on Twitter than we do." Its not news, its CNN
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(93)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Scuba-diving Satanists hack off arms of submerged Jesus statue
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(293)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: The wind
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
What better place for a high school cheerleaders' field trip than a male strip club?
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(146)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
You're gonna love Maya nuts
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
Forget the repo man -- new cars are going to come equipped with a "kill switch" that enables the manufacturer to shut down your vehicle until you pay up
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(232)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Reason #47 that the rest of the world hates us: Tupperware parties for pets
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
"Revolutionary" new sex spray designed to help men last longer may cause penile rashes and burning vaginas. To be fair, either one of those symptoms is likely to seriously delay orgasm
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Watch out, your balls might explode
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(11 year old at Taco Bell)
 
 
 
'How come two women were coming out of the bathroom and why were two guys in there? And they were making funny noises
source: wndu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(161)
 
(My Fox)
 
 
 
$3,000 chihuahua puppy returned to pet store with note, which presumably asked the store why anyone would pay three grand for a jittery rat
source: myfoxatlanta.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(107)
 
(ABC2News Baltimore)
 
 
 
Baltimore high school teacher decides having sex with her students isn't original enough, and is charged with selling crack cocaine in large volume
source: abc2news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Australian residents increasingly jumpy after woman attacked by 'hungry kangaroo'
source: mailonsunday.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Her sex screams were so loud that even her half-deaf neighbour complained
source: sunderlandecho.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(168)
 
(Some Badass Gal)
 
 
 
Wife tracks down stolen car by cross checking stolen cell phone records and harassing the thiefs' family members and friends... and then it gets better
source: wbbm780.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(188)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
This weeks TSG photo contest. Name the Hollywood star who was arrested in the pictured house. We got skunked last week, lets not make a habit of it. Contest ends 4pm Eastern
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(100)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Saturday is "Record Store Day." Hmm? Oh, sure. A "record" is a vinyl disc with grooves in it that, when played on a "record player" would play music. They used to be sold in buildings called "stores"
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(165)
 
(KCCI Des Moines)
 
 
 
Lord, perhaps I wasn't specific in my prayer. I wanted to find a young, fit, drunk FEMALE stranger passed out in my hot tub
source: kcci.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 
(Foobies)
 
 
 
Problem: Prostitutes are suffering from a lack of trade due to the financial crisis. Solution: 'Full service' being offered for just €20 and patrons get free snacks
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(93)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Police officer injured in hit-and-run. Difficulty: Suspect's car did not hit the police car or the police officer
source: kmbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(122)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Cleveland Fark Party 4/17 @ 8 PM during Notacon (conf attendence not required for the party). Drew will be there, details in thread (thread now open)
source: blog.notacon.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(TorrentFreak)
 
 
 
Pirate Bay founders sentenced to one year of pound-me-in-the-arrrrrse prison
source: torrentfreak.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(695)
 
(WJZ.com)
 
 
 
Gang members were able to smuggle seafood dinners, cigars, drugs, weapons, cell phones, and luxuries such as champagne into Maryland prisons. But, it really cost them in the end
source: wjz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(Stanford University)
 
 
 
AP: " You made art out of our photograph without permission." Shepard Fairey: "Yeah, but you guys photograph art without permission all the time." AP: "Um... well..."
source: cyberlaw.stanford.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(120)
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
"Don't drink and drive" doesn't mean "Don't call in a fake armed robbery to distract the police so you can drive home"
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Boy falls into a vat of caustic soda. No lye
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(141)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this mining machine in the mist
source: de.img.seen.by   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Today's Darwin Award goes to the stand-up comedian killed by inhaling laughing gas while watching porn
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(161)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Jerly Lyngdoh is a 26-year old trapped inside a two-year old's body. He should probably have used more lube
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(137)
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Bartender breaks world record for making 662 drinks in an hour, he also breaks the hearts of Farkers everywhere when most are poured out
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
My how times have changed: The French President openly called the American President a cowardly, indecisive wimp
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(690)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Not news: Man convicted of operating vehicle under the influence. News: He's a driver's ed instructor. Fark: He was in the passenger seat giving a lesson
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
You know what bugs me? Learning that the Bush administration approved using insects in interrogations
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(592)
 
(Tinypic)
 
 
 
Caption P-Diddy and his possible confusion
source: i42.tinypic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(96)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Health warning for hairy woman. Yes, there is a OMFG what has been seen can not be unseen pic. Queue the Austin Powers quotes
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(214)
 


Thu April 16, 2009
(Chron)
 
 
 
Are you in legal trouble? Don't call Perry Mason
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
Don't you hate it when a burglar breaks into your home and pees in your bathtub, in your kitchen sink, and on a sack of potatoes
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Woman drives over teenager, pays him $5 to quietly moan in pain
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Sheep go to Heaven, goats go to Carl's Jr
source: latimesblogs.latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(NCBuy)
 
 
 
Al Capone. Gangster, bootlegger, extortionist, tax evader, and... writer of show tunes
source: kevxml2a.infospace.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(21)
 
(Forbes)
 
 
 
Citing real estate market conditions, Port Authority of New York proposes indefinitely putting off building of WTC towers. 9/11/01: We have forgotten
source: forbes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(254)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this creepy eye
source: donrugenstein.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(108)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
McDonald's golden arches topple in high winds, crush couple. Police investigating if they couldn't get away due to fallen arches
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
VA Tech honors slain students by running three miles at the sound of a gun
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Schoolgirl: "Please save my horsy." Mobile Company: "Who cares?" Schoolgirl: "He's got a marking identical to your company logo." Mobile Company: "how much money do you need?"
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 
(AFP)
 
 
 
Sinatra's "My Way" ranked as #1 popular song to play at funerals, narrowly beating out "Another One Bites the Dust," "Highway to Hell"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(284)
 
(ABC Action News)
 
 
 
County begins to charge inmates for their incarceration in new "get charged, then get charged" program
source: abcactionnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(103)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Female Domino's Pizza prankster is a registered sex offender. Was involved in illicit acts with a 14-year-old girl
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(177)
 
(PIX11 News)
 
 
 
Woman sues for $160M after spilling hot hair-removal wax on her body after microwaving it too long. Women everywhere douse themselves with hot McDonald's coffee in a show of solidarity
source: wpix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(250)
 
(Seacoastonline.com)
 
 
 
If you only pay one bill this month, make sure it's the one for restitution for denting a police cruiser with your head
source: seacoastonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Deceased Mexican drug cartel bosses are buried in mausoleums surrounded by bullet-proof glass, which probably would have come in handy at some point in the recent past
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Breasts should not be operated on using veterinary instruments
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(362)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Hells EHngels? Biker gangs have sprung up in Canada; are just like their U.S. counterparts except they use quiet mufflers on their bikes to be considerate of others, and main form of intimidation is strongly-worded letters
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(184)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Man, distressed at finding out he's flying to Nunavut, Canada, pries door of plane open at 23,000 feet and jumps to his death
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(183)
 
(RedOrbit)
 
 
 
Don't post a photo of your ballot online unless you want to spend a year getting intimate with your new cellmate, Hanging Chad
source: redorbit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(100)
 
(I Heart Chaos)
 
 
 
Video games based on movies are notoriously crappy, but here are 10 examples of the game somehow being better than the movie it was based on
source: iheartchaos.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(326)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Talk to the hand
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(myFOXaustin)
 
 
 
Drunk man tries to make a quick getaway on a steamroller. That's just flat stupid
source: myfoxaustin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(Barricade)
 
 
 
One guy's solution to eliminate America's financial problems and a Fark tag
source: thebarricadeblog.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(294)
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this Korg Kaossilator
source: flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(English Russia)
 
 
 
If the Mad Max scenario ever happens, the guy who did this Chevy Camaro modification is ready
source: englishrussia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(203)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Maersk Alabama crewmen back with families, trading one ordeal of powerlessness and marginalization for another
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
There's too much British weirdness in this obituary to fit in the headline so we'll start with "As a piece of eroticism I prefer kipper fillets with brown bread" and take it from there. Lemon curry
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Pe nis
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(253)
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
Even if a man on the dance floor is using "gay tactics," don't release your "inner cannibal"
source: calgaryherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Man at Panda Express eats shoots and leaves
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(133)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man jailed for 21 days after urinating on fellow passenger on airline flight. Guess he forgot the number one rule of air travel
source: honoluluadvertiser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(75)
 
(Some Frowning Guy)
 
 
 
Department of Justice is full of shenanigans about drug-related incarcerations, racial data is calculated nearly three-fifths off
source: tremblethedevil.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(151)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
How do you get to Carnegie Hall? YouTube, YouTube, YouTube
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man crashes through airport fence, heads for parked plane claiming he needed to "get to Israel" and that he had "all the answers." Bonus: plane was missing its propellers
source: ydr.inyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(dailynews.com)
 
 
 
Sheriff's Department cracking down on Sheriff's Department after alcohol-related arrests doubled last year
source: dailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Government Minister believes that the best way to improve classroom behaviour is to introduce rowdy youths to the world of gambling
source: 888ladies-uk.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Man bites off end of own penis. Police found him after receiving an anonymous tip
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(176)
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
Swedish woman charged for attempting to castrate her boyfriend with a stun gun. Thankfully he put up enough resistance, but it's still a shocking story
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
New London cocktail bar pumps alchohol into the atmosphere, saving you the hassle of queuing at the bar
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Elderly woman sees orange glow in bathroom, evacuates home and calls 911. The Sun is there
source: theworldlink.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(Seacoastonline.com)
 
 
 
Turns out there is a tribe of atheists deep in the Amazonian jungle, where divorce is free, fat people get shallow graves, and common sense rules sexy time. They're even converting the missionaries
source: seacoastonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(925)
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Nanny state to give 12-year-old girls breastfeeding lessons
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Bank robber tries to disguise himself by dressing as a woman, but his man hands gave him away. Not that there's anything wrong with it
source: blog.seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(Sky News)
 
 
 
"Bo", the First Dog, gets a book deal. It is for $5M upfront, 11.5% of the hardcover sales, 5.375% of paperback sales, but includes unlimited buttsniffery privileges
source: news.sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Ottawa Citizen)
 
 
 
Flint upset that it's being compared to Ottawa
source: ottawacitizen.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Historical figures as rock stars
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(115)
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
Two fifth-graders who looked at porn on a school computer may face criminal charges
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(143)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
50-year-old mother spends £10,000 on surgery to look like daughter
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(189)
 
(Local10 WPLG)
 
 
 
Mechanics capitalize on drivers' ignorance, record low prices for blinker fluid
source: justnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(145)
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Council's brilliant, cost-free plan to slow down traffic: Stop filling in the holes in the road
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(WWL)
 
 
 
"Police say alcohol may have been a factor in fight over the can of pork and beans which preceded the stabbing"
source: wwl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(Albany Times Union)
 
 
 
It's your standard boy-meets-girl (at 12-step meeting), boy-loses-girl, boy gets pancreatic cancer, girl comes back after ten years, boy and girl die within nine hours of each other story
source: timesunion.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 206: "Graves II: The Dead Zone"
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(225)
 


Wed April 15, 2009
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Life imitates bad Samuel Jackson movie - Plane grounded due to snakes
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Seattle Children's Theater seeks IT professional to fill job opening. Must love children, though not as much as the last IT guy
source: slog.thestranger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Some Chick)
 
 
 
Woman chases burglar out of her home, tackles him and then bites a chunk out of his finger to save as DNA evidence resulting in his arrest. Chick has balls
source: greenbaypressgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Instead of topics like the war, the economy, or taxes, George Will decides to write a column complaining that too many adults wear denim. "Denim on the bourgeoisie is the wardrobe equivalent of driving a Hummer to a Whole Foods store"
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(188)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
If you're going to try to smuggle rare tortoises into the US, it's probably not the best idea to hide them in a box labeled "live scorpions", since those are just as illegal to smuggle
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Meet the plucky 86-year-old who pummeled a burglar into submission using only her crutch. No, her crutch. Her CRUTCH, dammit
source: dailyexpress.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
London suffering from "shocking" rise of rare Victorian diseases, as cases of typhoid, whooping coughs and the mumps is on the rise. Cholera and Black Death to soon make an unexpected comeback
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(129)
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
1,500 farmers commit mass suicide. Boy, are they going to be pissed when they find out someone forgot to notify the Guinness Book of World Records
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(116)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Octomom™ diapers: coming soon to a store near you
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(179)
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Facing a crater in the budget for a Mt. St. Helen's monument, the public is erupting with anger and spewing suggestions at an advisory committee, telling them not to blow federal funds unwisely. What a bunch of ashes
source: seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(Some Pot Smoker)
 
 
 
Man claims he can't be charged with DUI because he was high, not drunk. You're doing it wrong
source: gainesville.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Star Wars characters start new careers in advertising
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(Contact Music)
 
 
 
Actress who played Mickey Spillane's secretary dies at 84. But there was something about this case that didn't add up. I couldn't quite figure it out. This dame had class. Who would ice her? I decided to start poking around
source: contactmusic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(88)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
(____|____) = $2x
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(359)
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
Fark.com called an Internet leader in "ill-informed and subliterate comments, which is apparently where one goes for that sort of thing." WERE NUBMER ONE WERE NUBMEER OEN
source: weblogs.baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(526)
 
(The News Messenger)
 
 
 
There are several good ways to prove your weight to a judge - dropping your pants in the courtroom isn't one of them
source: thenews-messenger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Caption President Obama and the Secretary of the Bunterior
source: photos.upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(140)
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Use condoms or make Hitler
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(99)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Exclusive photos of the three pirates who have kicked the bucket, shuffled off this mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin' choir invisibile. THIS IS AN EX-PIRATE
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(222)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
French frigate seizes 11 pirates. This is not a repeat from 1799
source: uk.reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(236)
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Taxes, Schmaxes. What happens if I don't file my tax return?
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(403)
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Foiling a convenience store robbery is so easy, even a caveman can do it
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Good thing Mexican drug cartels aren't buying guns from U.S. dealers. Oh, wait
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(310)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Protesting Afghani's marriage laws? That's a stoning
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(192)
 
(WESH Orlando)
 
 
 
Elementary school teacher reinstated after bringing her gun to school because 3rd graders can be dangerous at times
source: wesh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Remember when Congress passed that law to make declaring bankruptcy more difficult? Yeah, well that was before the economy shiat the bed
source: wsbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(129)
 
(STLToday)
 
 
 
Police officer nabs suspect in fatal shooting, is praised by mayor in front of city council hours later. Five minutes after THAT, city council votes to lay him off. Taa-daa
source: stltoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Thanks to clueless politicians with good intentions, Massachusetts National Guard soldiers make less money fighting in Iraq than they would make on training exercises at home
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Dog emerges 'happy' after eight days buried in the rubble of the Italian earthquake [pic]
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Dear Tenant: Thank you for saving grandma's life. Now GTFO
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
Man keeps jumping into a river because he likes the attention it gets from police. "I thought you were my friend."
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
Students in Iowa will be taught drivers ed by teachers who have been convicted of causing traffic accidents in the past two years. "The thing is, there's not a surplus of drivers ed teachers."
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Woman fakes son's kidnapping, allows boyfriend to burn him with blowtorch, in order to get ransom from boy's father
source: blogs.tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
Students are still expected to *gasp* STAND during the Pledge of Allegiance
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(389)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Slow police day in Kenya after man bites python who was about to eat him. "We want to arrest the snake because any one of us could fall a victim." Wait...what?
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 
(Vernal Express)
 
 
 
Utah woman has sex with sleeping boy. Boy says he asked her to leave as soon as he woke up. Subby *almost* believes him, almost. BONUS: first comment earns Dumbass tag
source: vernal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(177)
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this really flat tire
source: flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
ACLU is shocked, SHOCKED to discover that Los Angeles jails are full of rape and violence
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(89)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Good news, Mr. Jones: we can cure your addiction. You just have to take these pills. Forever
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(142)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
A list of the top 10 "quintessentially British" foods, and it's as bad as you think. Sausages made with blood? Check. Pies made with slabs of lard? There. Something called "Parkin'? Yup
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(167)
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
Obama's got one ugly biatch
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(278)
 
(Some San Diego dude)
 
 
 
Impromptu San Diego Fark party tonight, 5pm at Yardhouse. LGT venue
source: yardhouse.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(95)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Florida's SEAL museum would like relics from last weeks pirate take-down, Heidi Klum's thong back
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(111)
 
(Telegram)
 
 
 
If you lost two bulls in central Massachusetts recently, a lot of people found them in the middle of rush hour traffic on Route 146 and could you come get them please?
source: telegram.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(ABC Action News)
 
 
 
Husband threatens to shoot family, loads handgun while explaining who gets which bullet. When finished, discovers wife was quicker on the reload, draw parts
source: abcactionnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(218)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Energy drinks work more directly on brain, not on body's energy levels. Apparently paying $2 for 7oz of carbonated cough syrup still seems intelligent
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(141)
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
Swedish woman falls pregnant after doctors accidentally substitute dummy for the contraceptive implant she thought she was getting. On the plus side, it should give the fetus something to do for nine months
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(116)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
No matter how much of a good idea it might seem at the time, please don't tape your dog to the fridge
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(92)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
LA School board votes to use the $180M stimulus dollars intended to save jobs to lay off 5,400 employees. For some reason people have a problem with that
source: abclocal.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(152)
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
Glassmaker says you should match the glass to the wine for best taste. Subby thinks it tastes fine right out the box
source: baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(165)
 
(US-101)
 
 
 
Nine-year old boy angry with his mother burns a Dollar Store to ground; tens of dollars in damage estimated
source: us101country.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Hi there, Twitter widow. Come on up and have a seat beside the WoW widow, Fark widow, and porn widow. Hugs all around
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(196)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
The system goes on-line August 4th, 1980. Human decisions are removed from reporting the news. Newscorp begins to learn, at a geometric rate. It becomes self-aware at 2:14 a.m. eastern time, April 14
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
In order to survive in the face of our new economic reality, some men are rediscovering forgotten tasks such as canning, gardening, and sewing. Or, in other words, they're becoming women
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(238)
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
If you're a cop looking to extort businesses and make them use your private security company, avoid places like churches, bars, and Kiddieland fun park
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(STLToday)
 
 
 
Police arrest two in counterfeit coupon ring but court finds that one of the arrests was expired
source: stltoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(Popular Mechanics)
 
 
 
The Top 10 Nerf Guns of All Time
source: popularmechanics.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(227)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Caption this yelling yob
source: inapcache.boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(99)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Man dragged out of bed and arrested for having a porcelain pig in his yard. The Sun, it shines on the swine
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(101)
 
(CBS13.com - CBS Sacramento)
 
 
 
Bitter cheerleaders get their coach fired for posing nude in Playboy after being nixed from team. Isn't karma a biatch?
source: cbs13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(283)
 
(KSBW Action News 8)
 
 
 
Close-knit officers cleared of charges after shooting epileptic woman brandishing a crochet hook. Sent her to the perly gates, they did
source: ksbw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(104)
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Silver canisters on Washington beaches may contain poison. The most dangerous ones are labeled "Coors"
source: seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Today's Iron Photoshop ingredient: Eggs
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(mlive)
 
 
 
Local paper asks the question we've all had on our minds: "When is it OK to buy from the back of a van?"
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Mel Gibson is building a compound for members of his church. What a waco, uh, I mean whacko
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(The Crimson)
 
 
 
UT professor: "Pornography is what the end of the world looks like," asks audience members who masturbated to porn in last 48 hours to stand up
source: thecrimson.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(472)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Sewing machine sales in Saudi soar as people start believing that you can use them to build a nuclear bomb
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(Forbes)
 
 
 
Study finds that black patients with lung cancer are less likely than white patients to receive proper treatment. That's not KOOL
source: forbes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
With all other problems solved, US government hosts first-ever conference on the elimination of bedbugs
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(JSOnline)
 
 
 
Mom won't give you $2 to get into the bar? Maybe a slashing and a few rounds from an AK-47 will change her mind
source: jsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
Swedish man catches Parrot fever, begins pining for the fjords
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
How many container ships does it take to equal all the world's cars in pollution? a) 15; b) 150; c) 1,500; d) 15,000. Goodbye Dollar Store. Hello SUV
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(279)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Pirates fire rocket-propelled grenades and automatic weapons at a U.S.-flagged cargo ship, then flee when U.S. Navy shows up
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(230)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Pastor Creflo Dollar loves all creatures great and small. He just doesn't feed them
source: wsbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(My San Antonio)
 
 
 
Asshat get elementary school cited for noise, tells police "police, fire, ambulances and the USAF training jets are not unreasonable, but the noise coming from the elementary school was."
source: mysanantonio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
School-bus driver arrested after leaving autistic boy on the bus while she went shopping for party supplies; bus-driver claims she is a victim of McCarthyism
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
Gasoline expected to remain cheap this summer. Too bad you don't have a job and can't afford to go anywhere
source: baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Average set of parents spend more than $50,000 on their crotchfruit before their third birthday - and spend most of that before the thing is even one year old
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(197)
 


Tue April 14, 2009
(Breitbart.com)
 
 
 
British man arrested for spraying urine on food. Customers grew suspicious after noticing the inexplicable presence of flavor in British cuisine
source: breitbart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Schoolboy who went missing for 2 weeks sparking nationwide search rode his bike almost 600 miles to Sydney ... for fast food
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(133)
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
An aspirin-a-day can make your brain explode
source: dailyexpress.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this marvelous man
source: rachelhulin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Actual headline: Pet dog's underwear fetish almost proves fatal
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Naked knife-throwing sis severs bro's nose
source: modbee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(99)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Dubai clones camel. Researchers say they're glad to get over that hump (pic)
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Unfortunately, using a giant catapult to hurl chicken droppings at burglars does not count as "reasonable force"
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(KING)
 
 
 
2-year-old boy, lost after wandering away from home, saved by his puppy who kept him warm overnight by cuddling
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 
(9 News)
 
 
 
Man shocked, SHOCKED when aluminum ladder hits power line
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Texas governor affirms sovereignty under the 10th amendment, says the state will no longer accept "the oppressive hand" of the Federal Government in its affairs. This worked out well the last time around
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(1084)
 
(Occupy.com)
 
 
 
Honey, I've got a great idea... Let's build a porch using headstones from the veteran cemetery where you work. What? That's a problem?
source: lasvegasnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(100)
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
We're jailing people for sending porn to their neighbors? What's this world coming to?
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Ohhh those crazy Russians and their tendencies to turn men who rob them into sex slaves
source: russiatoday.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(134)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this filleting o' fish
source: image.blog.livedoor.jp   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(Hartford Courant)
 
 
 
Woman loses bid to keep 18 dogs in home as it is not zoned to store that much peanut butter
source: courant.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
Swedish politicians outraged that some parents don't let their girls be as slutty as the law allows
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(214)
 
(Albany Times Union)
 
 
 
Man busted for stealing over $1,000 worth of cigarettes from convenience store. That's what, like four packs?
source: timesunion.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(89)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Ways not to get out of a DUI charge include "faking your own death"
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
Unstable, financially troubled regime currently in possession of enough uranium to make a nuclear bomb. North Korea? Iran? Nope. Try Lehman Brothers
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
If you're going to play hide and seek in a stranger's shed, try not to pick one packed with explosives
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
If the cops finally do manage to catch you after a high-speed pursuit, taking off all your clothes will not help
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man calls the cops after hooker steals his pants
source: onlineathens.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
In Los Angeles schools, your child will be taught reading, writing, math, and Kabbalah
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(264)
 
(STLToday)
 
 
 
Priest goes deep inside another parishioner. Community approves
source: stltoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
IRS claiming to see large rise in income tax deliquencies, people listing "Obama Administration Cabinet Member" as their occupation
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(263)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Not this sh*t again: North Korea kicks out nuclear inspectors. US invades in 3... 2
source: online.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(251)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Six teenage girls charged with attempted robbery and attacking a woman with a hatchet. Victim is good condition after having her ax wound treated by her gynecologist
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(82)
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
Pervert looks up seven-year-old's dress and runs away, only to get tackled by a guy who randomly attacks people who are running
source: calgaryherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(Jacksonville.com)
 
 
 
Ugly ass Jaguar cub "Harry" makes his first appearance at the J-Ville Zoo. With video of the little dude
source: jacksonville.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Kansas City)
 
 
 
Kansas City PD wrecks three squad cars in 15 hours, reinstates ban on drinking while on duty
source: kansascity.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
After getting pwnd twice now, Somali pirates vow to kill US and French hostages instead of holding them for ransom. QQ moar noobs or learn 2 play
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(704)
 
(Eurasianet.org)
 
 
 
Controversy surrounds first-ever production of Vagina Monologues in Kyrgyzstan due to inclusion of strong sexual content, vowels
source: eurasianet.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Despite carjacking at gunpoint, Dutch reporter claims the tone and conclusions she made about Detroit will not be affected; because they were already that bad to begin with
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(George Washington)
 
 
 
The coolest laser etched stack of dollar bills you'll see today
source: divinecaroline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(125)
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
Are Mexican officials spending their time (a) trying to hault drug cartels; (b) create employment opportunities for their people; or (c) writing nasty letters to Burger King because of a commercial
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Rob just ONE bank, and they strip you of your law license.. Sheesh
source: wwl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Carl's Jr deals with image problem in its advertising by practically undressing Padma Lakshmi as she makes love to a hamburger: "Any minute now, Ronald McDonald is going to mount a stripper pole"
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(169)
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
Canadian warship dealing with Somali pirates who attacked Greek ship from behind
source: calgaryherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
Photoshop these obsessed outside observers
source: spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(ABA Journal)
 
 
 
Study concludes it's hard to tell alcoholic lawyers from sober ones
source: abajournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(270)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
UNICEF "deeply concerned" about marriage of eight year old. The happy couple is registered at Pottery Barn, Toys R Us
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(154)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
"Currently investigation one of our former employees who for fraud... she no longer works here she resigned in late January," said Napa police commander Captain Incoherent
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(NBC Miami)
 
 
 
Six-year-old's PSP comes preloaded with porn. His mom wants an apology; the kid just wants the PSP back
source: nbcmiami.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
UK to fight terror bombers with Google bombers
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Mother drops off her month-old infant on the sidewalk before car chase
source: blogs.tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Twelve yards long and two lanes wide/ sixty-five tons of American pride/Canyonero Canyonero/ Top of the line in utility sports/ Unexplained fires are a matter for the courts
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Smart fortwo, Honda Fit, and Yaris do badly in crash tests. Manufacturers dismiss tests as "rare and extreme scenario." The scenario? Collision with Honda Accord
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(199)
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Teacher calls eighth grade boy "husband", threatens him with divorce for having "too many little girlfriends"
source: blogs.tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(Gwinnett Daily Post)
 
 
 
Cool: Finally getting some press coverage for your newly unveiled minor league stadium. Not-so-cool: The press is there to watch the fire
source: gwinnettdailypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Twenty people die in Peru when bus driver suddenly lets his speed drop below 50mph
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
Wild boar attacks woman in Swedish cemetery. Brick Top unavailable for comment
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
Recession leads bargain hunters to the auction circuit in search of . . . groceries?
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
If you've been waiting for the latest "how smoking marijuana led to my being an out-of-control drug addict whose life spiraled into the gutter" story on CNN, here you go
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(427)
 
(FDNM)
 
 
 
In the latest example of Idiocracy becoming reality, gun rights group holds an open carry day with a U.S. Representative in Carl's Jr
source: newsminer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(412)
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Women have found a way to beat the recession. It's called "lipstick"
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(161)
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Photoshop this stern preacher
source: graphics8.nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(Some NY State worker)
 
 
 
What do you do after 14 people are shot and killed in the building next door? Why, sue for your missed lunch hour, of course
source: pressconnects.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(211)
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
A new identity now costs less than a can of coke
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(75)
 
(WCAX)
 
 
 
"Facebook could take tool on schoolwork"
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
North Korea says it will boycott nuclear talks, upgrade Photoshop
source: online.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Bra saves womans life, lifting and separating a stray bullet from an armed robbery
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(197)
 
(Nerve)
 
 
 
Sex shop offering free toys tomorrow to the first 100 people to come in and say they filed their tax return, even though those same people will have already been pretty screwed pretty thoroughly
source: nerve.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this alien Canadian
source: s.wsj.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(Eagle Tribune)
 
 
 
This is can't be right. School Committee members overruled Superintendent to allow performances of "The Vagina Monologues". Don't they know "vagina" is a bad word?
source: eagletribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 
(D.Trump)
 
 
 
Yep, "The Donald" is a pussy
source: statesmanjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Five-year old rides NYC subway for an hour before being noticed. Mother calls authorities response "good and fast" (link updated)
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
You've got to love a bar fight that includes a woman getting hit in the head with a crutch
source: kitsapsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
It's an anteater wearing a purple sweater. Hey, this is Fark.com - what the hell else do you want?
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Somali Pirates learn from Jerry Bruckheimer and begin filming their third installment of "Pirates of the Aden"
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(230)
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Tennessee Fox station thinks it would be funny to put South Park's "Towlie" on a desk behind the anchors. Bonus: a Klan hood under the desk. Fark: both clearly visible in wide shot
source: farm4.static.flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(146)
 
(Click On Detroit)
 
 
 
Prolific Youtube poster, known for his passionate defense of Christianity and vehement rants against the inhumanity of atheists, commits murder-suicide
source: clickondetroit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(861)
 
(Madison.com)
 
 
 
Nurse fired in the middle of surgery
source: madison.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(95)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Muslim group issues fatwa over poor cell phone etiquette, like using them to detonate IEDs in the middle of prayers
source: channel4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(95)
 


Mon April 13, 2009
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Involved in a teacher-student-student charter school love triangle? That's a stabbin'
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Phil Spector mug shot. Apparently he was surprised by today's murder conviction
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(123)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Media spins the Wheel of Fearmongering. And the winner is...gravel roads cause cancer
source: wsbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(72)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Some days, you're on the highway when money or crates of beer get spilled. Other days, you're on the highway when sulphuric acid gets spilled
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(Some sword swinging tfette)
 
 
 
Two people in Indianapolis die in a sword fight. No motive, but police are quickening the investigation. There can be only one desired outcome, an arrest
source: whas11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(168)
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
That furor about Amazon de-listing all their GLBT books? Yeah, maybe not so much
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(155)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Theme: Combine a plant and an animal to make a new species
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(120)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
"So who covers all the news if some significant fraction of the currently employed newspaper people lose their jobs? I don't know. Nobody knows. It's easier to see what's broken than what will replace it"
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(156)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Stay at home moms prefer kinky internet fantasies to kinky soap opera fantasies - It's not news, it's CNN
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(127)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
PETA thinks Obama's order banning torture of terrorism detainees should have included animals. In related news, there are innocent puppies and bunnies incarcerated at GitMo
source: getactive.peta.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(103)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Woman has sex with 14-year old boy she met at the go-kart track, inadvertently earns her high school teaching credential
source: redding.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(122)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Wild Turkey crashes family's Easter dinner, marking just the latest time that Wild Turkey has played a role in destroying a family get-together
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Meet the young gunmen who robbed 50 X-rated movies from an adult film store. With an early nominee for mugshot of the week
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(161)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Tip for the recession #326 - eat the snails from your garden. "They are perfectly good meat. They are very high in protein and low in fat; in some ways, they are better than beef"
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(Rian.Ru)
 
 
 
Russian doctors remove five-centimeter tree from man's lung. The patient is in a little pine, but is expected to spruce right up
source: en.rian.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(99)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
World's laziest protesters demand their college stop observing Columbus Day. Oh, they still want the day off; they just want to call it something else
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(106)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Josh and Anna Duggar begin the iron uterus challenge
source: twirlit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(290)
 
(CNN)
 
NewsFlash
 
Our long national hair nightmare is over: Phil Spector found guilty of second-degree murder
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(197)
 
(Cincinnati Enquirer)
 
 
 
♫ I'm. An. Ang. Ry. Di. Vor. Cee. ♫ BURNIN' DOWN THE HOUSE ♫
source: news.cincinnati.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(Seacoastonline.com)
 
 
 
Best mug shot of a woman who threw a pint of ice cream through the window of the store that refused to sell her beer that you'll see all day
source: seacoastonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(Buffalo News)
 
 
 
"It's the Polish version of buying someone a drink, except you don't use the glass, you just squirt it right at them"
source: buffalonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
If you want to get that perfect photograph of yourself holding onto a cliff with just a tuft of grass, always try and distract Darwin first
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(78)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Prison worker pleads guilty to abusing inmates by having sex with them. Oh yes, there is indeed a mugshot. Don't say I didn't warn you
source: newswatch50.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(122)
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Actual Headline: "Spokane parks to detonate squirrels"
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(141)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
"Metrosexual twigmen who admire your shoes are all very well in good times, but when the going gets tough, what women actually want is a REAL man"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(471)
 
(Deutsche Welle)
 
 
 
Taliban in Afghanistan gun down women's rights advocate for violating the Sharia prohibition against having both a vagina and an opinion
source: dw-world.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(186)
 
(Popular Mechanics)
 
 
 
If you think FEMA is building concentration camps in America, Popular Mechanics would like to speak to you
source: popularmechanics.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(467)
 
(NBC Chicago)
 
 
 
Either Cubs fans are presenting an offering to the gods, or they're the best fans ever
source: nbcchicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(220)
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
Chicago-area library bans offensive odors. This is in no way a thinly-veiled attempt to ban the homeless
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(119)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Heroin is cheaper than a six pack of beer. And if that beer is Coors, it tastes better, too
source: amfix.blogs.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(180)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Television orgasms, exploding pie factories and Swedish transexual philosophers: Headlines of the Week 4/5 to 4/11
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
Boy charged with domestic battery for throwing gum; defense attorneys say charges won't stick once they rub some peanut butter on them
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(CBS2.com - KCBS Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Man breaks into woman's home and steals her laptop, camera and...just kidding, he just wanted to wear her lingerie
source: cbs2.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Saudi Arabia bans license plates with numbers that spell out "offensive" words in English. So 80085 is right out
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Landlords increasingly monitoring tenants' Facebook pages and evicting idiots who post pictures of their wild house parties there
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(98)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Canadian province announces it will no longer fund sex change operations. In other news, Canada has been funding sex change operations
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(108)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
"Britian's Fattest Teen" loses 12 stone in seven months. So that's like, 250 pounds right? (with startling pics)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(409)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Banned from playing cards at your local senior center because you complained about the scoring? Well, why don't you make a federal case out of? Oh, wait
source: madison.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Good luck, we are all counting on you
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(312)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
Schools increasingly hiring bouncers "to make students behave"
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(72)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this woman watching Wilson
source: s.wsj.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(WFMU)
 
 
 
Twelve things to hate about NPR. "8) Politically Correct Pronunciation." En-chee-ada
source: blog.wfmu.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(698)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Artist paints his house, and everything in it, single shade of blue of to test psychological effects of living surrounded by one color, piss off the neighbours. So far, it's working (cool pic)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(172)
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Howdy neighbor, how about we work out this tree problem? Okay, let me get my shotgun
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(Globe and Mail)
 
 
 
Man attempts to destroy neighbor's garage... for 30 years
source: theglobeandmail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
So how exactly do you un-baptize somebody?
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(228)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
More college students are paying for their education with credit cards
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(124)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Harvard University opens "Canine Cognition Lab" to study how dogs think. Your dog is thinking about steak
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Help Wanted: Woman, above average height, medium build. Must be willing to stick head in toilet. Apply in person at the District Attorney's office, and bring a towel
source: sheboyganpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
Public art could take a hit in Florida, as legislators debate what's needed more -- health care for kids or giant bedazzled manatees
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Pet dog goes in for a minor stomach operation...and surgeons find 17 garments, including nine socks, four gloves and a stocking
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(107)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Right on schedule, here is your first news story claiming Somali pirates are actually pretty nice chaps, and America only made things worse by killing three of them
source: hos