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Sun April 12, 2009
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(WLTX.com)
 
 
 
Man tries to rob Alcoholics Anonymous meeting, gets free shot
source: wltx.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(135)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Feeding 5,000 people with two loaves of bread and five fish. New hotness: Jamming 90 cars into a 40-car parking lot
source: gazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Today's bomb scare brought to you by the Washington County Jail and a prosthetic leg
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Tired of Iowa stealing all the headlines, Vermont considers legalizing sexting
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
United Airlines could have easily gotten you to your dying mother on time, unfortunately one tiny little detail got in the way: It was time for someone to take their break
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(167)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Good news: Recession to End This Year. Bad news: Unemployment Will Hit Nearly 10%
source: voices.washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(106)
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Educators, business world beginning to notice negative effects of two decades of "Everybody Gets a Trophy Day"
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(185)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Dear US Citizens: Sorry we mistook you for an illegal immigrant and deported you. Our bad. Sincerely, US Law Enforcement
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Thailand is in the middle of a major political coup - but don't worry, the PM escap
source: nationmultimedia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(106)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Your car breaks down and you get the store owner's permission to leave it overnight. Sounds good, right? Until you realize your car has then been towed and destroyed. Bonus: still having to pay the fee
source: kptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(Some Yenko)
 
 
 
Time for a big bowl of Nostalgia pudding. Collection of street scene photos from the 50's and 60's and more. Spiffy tag sits in for absent "Swell" tag
source: yenko.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(119)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Photoshop this boarded-up storefront
source: inapcache.boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(Mental Floss)
 
 
 
What's the most common item left behind at airport screening, why chatty pilots cause crashes, and other "everything you've always wondered about air travel" questions answered
source: mentalfloss.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Cuba braces for more devastating threat than communism: American tourists
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(119)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Cops who don't know anything about firearms arrest driver for steering wheel lock "gun"
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(89)
 
(Scotsman)
 
 
 
Top Catholic cardinal says Scotland faces "abyss of social collapse," with kids actively involved in drug-and-alcohol-fuelled promiscuity, hedonism, vandalism and outright nihilism. In other words, it's becoming Scotland
source: news.scotsman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Newt Gingrich voices what we're all thinking: coverage of the Obama's new dog is "fairly stupid"
source: politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(176)
 
(Edmontonsun.com)
 
 
 
After baby somehow keeps breathing after being taken off respirator, scrubbing proposed heart transplant operation, the parents face another gut-wrenching ethical dilemma: whether or not to sue the hospital
source: edmontonsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(LBC 97.3)
 
 
 
Bank of America raising credit card interest rates, even for its best customers. If only there was some tool for people to cut off charging stuff on plastic
source: wtsp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(175)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"It's not only pistachios and 50-pound tubs of peanut paste that have been infected with salmonella but also 500-pound pigs allowed to root and to roam pastures happily before butting heads with a bolt gun"
source: volokh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Proposed fees to alleviate budget shortfalls include accident response fees and streetlight user fees of $4.25 a month added to your electric bill
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(MSNBC)
 
NewsFlash
 
Captain Richard Phillips freed. 3 of 4 pirates dead. Remaining pirate in custody
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(810)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Bow down before the tender majesty of life-sized Lego Jesus, courtesy of 40 Swedish parishioners, 30,000 Legos, and 18 months of work
source: insidebayarea.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(72)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Newspapers are failing because comics suck nowadays. Bring back Family Circle
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(159)
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
Scientists say basic personality types, "novelty seeking", "harm avoidance", "reward dependence", and "persistence" are all decided at birth. "Attorney" is something you grow into
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(72)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Church leaders say with people losing their jobs and homes during credit crunch, now is the perfect time to sell the benefits of living a monastic lifestyle
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(Telegram)
 
 
 
Photoshop this guy and his chocolate bunny
source: telegram.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Seventy-one-year-old guy spending month living in a phone booth in attempt to get a tree planted on the White House lawn
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
British farmers learn it's a lot easier for customers to be smug when they aren't going broke
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Listen up all you Fark Singles™, married folks really are a lot happier than you are, no matter how much you try to deny the truth of your miserable, lonely existence. Have a nice day
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(329)
 
(Columbia Missourian)
 
 
 
Parents of the Year allow 10-yr-old daughter to ride an ATV next to a highway. The obvious happens. Now they're suing
source: columbiamissourian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(136)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Man serves sentence for drug distribution...then finds out he owes the state $47 million for failing to purchase "drug stamps"
source: wwl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
State shocked to find that violent mental patients might actually harm each other
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(Rian.Ru)
 
 
 
Careful North Korea, you're about to get a Strongly Worded Letter™ from the UN
source: en.rian.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(119)
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
Since we no longer have a War on Terror™ the National Guard has become much more selective
source: baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
"While in many countries the Easter dish may be lamb, in Venezuela a traditional delicacy around this time of the year is rodent." Mmm... rodent
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(The Newspaper)
 
 
 
If your car drives within a half mile of a school or traffic cone in Maryland, your wallet has been selected to help lobbyists recover the cost of their bribes
source: thenewspaper.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(193)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
"For me, telling children there's an Easter Bunny would be on a continuum with telling children there's a God, since I don't believe either"
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(253)
 
(Boston Herald)
 
 
 
Hospital tries to detect drunk plastic surgeons before they start cutting. It's all fun and games until somebody loses a nipple
source: news.bostonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Dude, she's 8. We don't care if it's legal, she's friggen' EIGHT
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(420)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Some Emergency Rooms are putting their wait times on the internet to improve customer service. If there's one thing a person has time to do when they have a medical emergency, it's logging on to the internet
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Drunken Australian man attempts to swim across crocodile-infested river near Darwin to get more alcohol, with predictable results
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
A variety of wrong ways to eat peeps
source: geeksaresexy.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Strange Easter traditions from around the world include spanking women on Easter Monday
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(Saturday Star)
 
 
 
Russian man drinks three bottles of vodka, jumps out 5-story window and lives. Ultrafark: TWICE
source: thestar.co.za   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this trapped tourist
source: flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
47-year old crazy cat lady auditions for Britain's Got Talent and brings down the house
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(142)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Our long national nightmare is finally over. The first family have their new dog
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(130)
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
With fronds like these...
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
If you could create your own religion, what would the rules/holidays/church services be like? (Voting enabled)
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(198)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
White powder residue on money causes bank teller to fall ill, Tony Montana and Scott Ian wanted for questioning
source: chicagobreakingnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(Buffalo News)
 
 
 
What not to say after you've been arrested selling pot from your car: "Man, it's just weed. I could be selling crack."
source: buffalonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Boulder rolls down hillside, goes airborne, crashes through a second-story wall of a home, careens off the dining room ceiling, smashes through a wall, and drops through the floor into the garage. Ta-dah
source: heraldextra.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Twelve years after woman wakes with a bloody face she begins getting headaches. It seems doctors failed to notice she had a bullet lodged in her head
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Prince hit by car, resuscitated by neighbor. "I just wiped his nose off a little bit. His jaw was in my hand."
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Easter surprise for a Hoppy Bunnday
source: abclocal.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(Wis State Journal)
 
 
 
Guy burns down childhood home because someone else was living in it. He sure did love that house
source: madison.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Climate bill could allow global warming victims to sue for damages
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(278)
 
(SanDiegoUnionTribune)
 
 
 
If you're going to visit a pawn shop, here's a few things you should know to make sure you don't get pwned
source: www3.signonsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(82)
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
For the first time, the White House has reached around barriers and invited a gay family to the Easter Egg Roll
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(120)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
A man fathered 14 children with 13 different women and owes more than $530,000 in unpaid child support, surprisingly isn't offered an NBA contract
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(203)
 


Sat April 11, 2009
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
In Philadelphia, Good Friday marks the day Jesus descended into Hell and met Girls Gone Wild
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Some Shroom)
 
 
 
Photoshop this nice specimen of the Chlorophyllum genus
source: pilzepilze.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Sioux City Journal)
 
 
 
Police pull over woman with 20 cats loose inside her car, then have to herd the escaped cats. I can has kitten drive?
source: siouxcityjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Teacher caught with crack cocaine has been allowed to keep his job for being an "excellent role model" ... A little edgy, but an outstanding teacher nevertheless
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(Gazette)
 
 
 
If you've lost a huge stuffed gorilla between Wisconsin and Minnesota, someone would like...... wait, what were you doing with a huge stuffed gorilla?
source: gazettextra.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Caption this woman trying to win a Darwin award
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(191)
 
(BDCwire)
 
 
 
Here's a twist on the hot female teacher, teenage student hookup: Father sues school for letting it happen
source: wbbm780.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(116)
 
(Dayton Daily News)
 
 
 
Here's a Tattoo slideshow for you....includes Redd Foxx and Mary Lou Retton Tats
source: projects.daytondailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(265)
 
(KNBC 4 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
First they came for the Amtrak mooners. And I didn't speak out for I wasn't an Amtrak mooner
source: nbclosangeles.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Lately more and more judges agree that internet anonymity should become a thing of the past. No longer should you bad-mouth someone anonymously. U R A Not E Bastage. LOLS
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(151)
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
Stripper accused of taking off her clothes in a police station says really just needed to go the bathroom and the only reason she failed a DUI test was because of her 5-inch stiletto heels. Stripper
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
We'd pick just one story to feature in this headline, but there's just too much gold here. Presenting today's South Carolina news roundup
source: columbiacitypaper.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(77)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Daily pill that could halt prostate cancer 'ready in three years' Still no cure for cancer, at least for three years
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(Some Drunk)
 
 
 
Guinness is giving away a trip to Dublin to celebrate the 250th anniversary of their non-existent bar towels
source: www2.guinness.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this collection of Calder
source: flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
The 5000 calorie Fifth Third burger makes its terrifying debut (w/ video). I can't believe I ate the whole thing
source: faniq.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(158)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
US sending in the Marines to deal with the pirates off the coast of Africa. No, this isn't a repeat from 1805
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(336)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Poland starts throwing people found drunk and riding a bicycle to a year in prison
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
We can rebuild her, we hav..... awwwwwwwww
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(159)
 
(Wikimedia)
 
 
 
Soft drink names broken down by region. Begun the soda wars have
source: upload.wikimedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(310)
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
A comeback? This rye-loving farker will tell you it's never been gone
source: seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(89)
 
(AFP)
 
 
 
Formerly respectable newspaper, the LA Times lowers itself to the level of the Goat Hollow Gazette by running an ad on the front page, that was nearly indistinguishable from its "news" content
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(141)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
"Rain may slow Oklahoma wildfires" In other breaking news, water may be wet, fire may be hot, and the waving wheat may sure smell sweet when the wind comes right behind the rain
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Due to one careless doctor, Chicago may be facing a tuberculosis outbreak. Choking is not a symptom, so the Cubs should be okay
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Chronicle of Higher Ed)
 
 
 
A smack-down to cheer every English major who had to read that silly little book: The Elements of Style is "by a pair of authors so grammatically clueless that they don't know what is a passive construction and what isn't"
source: chronicle.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(213)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Turns out sucking sugar through a straw increases risk of diabetes. Captain Obvious seen buying a slurpee
source: uk.reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(FDNM)
 
 
 
Surprisingly, people aren't willing to go to Alaska in a recession just because they saw it on TV
source: newsminer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(103)
 
(Myrtle Beach Online)
 
 
 
Be careful of what you say in cyberworld. Blogger loses $1.8M lawsuit about an article he claims he did not even write
source: thesunnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(78)
 
(The Star)
 
 
 
♪ Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale, A tale of a fateful trip ♪ ...Pirates on German ship unable to locate drifting lifeboat and return to Somali coast
source: thestar.com.my   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(125)
 
(AFP)
 
 
 
French overwhelmingly oppose rose wine made by mixing red, white. Wait until they discover Mad Dog 20/20 and Boone's Farm
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Finally some good news from Fark's favorite state: it's time for the annual Strawberry Festival which means a new Strawberry queen and her court. Yes, there are photos AND a video
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Seattle's own "Judge Judy" reprimanded for not suffering fools kindly enough. Again
source: seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
A handy cheat sheet for anyone wanting to travel back in time. This is not a joke. I have only done this once before. You will get paid once we return. Your safety is not guaranteed. You must bring your own weapons
source: i.gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(108)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
What consitutes being a real man, as explained by a columnist from noted macho magazine Esquire
source: dating.personals.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(107)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
China is starting to realize that they didn't quite think their "one child per family" rule all the way through
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(201)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Sunday school teacher arrested for murder of 8-year-old California girl
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(176)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Throwing the cat out with the garbage? That's a ... wait, it was rescued? Happy Caturday!
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(370)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Celebrities' desktops
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
30-year old woman used drugs and booze to lure male and female teenagers into having sex. Mugshot proves that cocaine is a helluva drug as it enhances beer goggles
source: katu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(107)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Angry at Iowa and Vermont for their gay marriage stances, God strikes Arkansas with deadly tornadoes
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(89)
 
(WBRZ News 2)
 
 
 
When going to jail to bail out an inmate, it's best not to bring meth and pot with you
source: 2theadvocate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(13)
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Man is fought off by 81-year-old woman over a dollar, so he jumps in nearby lake and drowns. "He was drunk"
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(Columbian)
 
 
 
Washington state environmental regulatory agency finally discovers the source of mysterious severe pollution of local creek: The sewer line from the agency's own office
source: columbian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(Detroit News)
 
 
 
Two Dutch journalists, having reported from war zones in Africa and the middle east, thought they were tough enough to do a report from Detroi... GET OUT OF THE CAR, FOOL
source: detnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(155)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Today's female teacher-on-student story comes to us from Texas. With hittable pic
source: news.mywebpal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(109)
 
(NASA)
 
 
 
Photoshop this LLRV flying
source: dfrc.nasa.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 
(The Register)
 
 
 
Goldman Sachs seeks suck site suits by the seashore
source: theregister.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
City finally discovers those responsible for rampant teen obesity: taco trucks. Or rather, ONE taco truck
source: blogs.sfweekly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(131)
 


Fri April 10, 2009
(officer.com)
 
 
 
Intoxicated Nebraskan goes hunting for deer..... with the grill of his pick-up truck. All he got was a security gate, barbed-wire fence, road spikes, and some new cop friends
source: officer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Man staples piece of paper to a tree, is then fined by Nanny State for 'harming a living tree.' Says baffled man: "I'm not an expert but I doubt that a staple could cause so much damage to a tree that it would actually die"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(100)
 
(Rochester D&C)
 
 
 
If you already have two DWIs, visiting a prison while drunk is probably a bad idea
source: democratandchronicle.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(12)
 
(Arizona Star)
 
 
 
Our long national nightmare is over: the 17-foot tall monkey at Tucson's now-closed Magic Carpet Mini-Golf has found a new home. Let us try to find peace and meaning in this news (pic)
source: azstarnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
Your career as a babysitter will not be a long one if the kid you're supposed to be watching wanders into an alligator-infested canal while you're passed out on the toilet
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(Scotsman)
 
 
 
Rare birds being "stolen to order" by gangs of thieves in what police are calling a particularly fowl crime
source: news.scotsman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
Illegal immigrant, with false social security number and fake name, sues for workers' comp benefits after getting hurt on job
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(307)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
If you know anything about a capsule containing Smurf dolls, a Rubik's Cube and baseball cards, Syosset adult elementary school alumni would like to have a word with you
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
32 tons of bait fish stolen in New Jersey. Local police trying to follow the smell of rotten fish end up driving down every street
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop Theme: Applying lessons we've learned from the movies
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
This week's mugshots include a familiar face and a mass of grey goo about to assimilate the camera
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(277)
 
(mlive.com)
 
 
 
Pitbull stops human attack
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(207)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Indian woman eats 51 ghost chilis in two minutes. Says that eating the world's hottest chili is still less painful than having to listen to Gordon Ramsay
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(237)
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
Vince took some time off of beating hookers to make a Sham Wow commercial in Spanish. Los alemanes hacen cosas buenas
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(174)
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
Man calls 911 to complain his kids won't listen to him. Time for a Tasing
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Today's campus shooting brought to you by Henry Ford Community College
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(173)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Man trying to claim disability payments because he claims a car accident left him "too fatigued to work" ordered to turn over his computer so investigators can see how much time he spends on Facebook every day
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(132)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Podiatrists warn that wearing UGG boots can have serious repercussions including long-term foot pain, looking like a dork
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(164)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
News media confirm they have surrounded Captain Phillip's house and are holding his wife hostage, will accept interview as ransom
source: onthescene.blogs.foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(72)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Nanny State to tag all cops with GPS, so crooks know exactly where they... er, I mean "To improve response times". Because knowing where someone is makes them respond faster
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(141)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
We've all met people, mostly women, who say they can just inhale chocolate. Well, now they really can
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(82)
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this snoring sleeper
source: farm4.static.flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Having solved all the crimes in Chicago, Police will now go after the scourge or drivers who don't yield
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(113)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
For only $90 you too can learn to drive the Zamboni
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(77)
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
Strip club employee demonstrates her talent during arrest
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(109)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Woman wins $25,000 for correctly guessing that jar contained 7,954 jellybeans, says the money will help her fly Quantas and shop at K-Mart more
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
As a former Chicago resident, when President Obama wants to order great deep-dish pizza, he gets it from...St. Louis?
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(496)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Swedish officials scanning sex webcam sites for tax dodgers. This is a long, meticulous task and may take several years
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(Some Vigilante)
 
 
 
"It's always open season on criminals in Mason County, and there is no bag limit...You might expect a lead enema"
source: kirotv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
Protip: If you're going to steal groceries from Wal-Mart, don't leave recently-developed photos behind
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(FDNM)
 
 
 
Today's helpful tip: If you're accused of sexual assault, marrying the accuser is a great way to get out of jail
source: newsminer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Drunken cops drive through town throwing eggs at prostitutes. That's some mighty fine police work, Lou
source: gainesville.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(121)
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
Drunk, stupid and shooting arrows at houses is no way to impress women, son
source: baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
It's all fun and games until you try and set fire to your student's hair
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Laugh Factory implores congress to consider funding their "economic cheer up", threatens nation with a Dane Cook special if they fail to comply
source: laughfactory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Facing hard times, Shriners may close 6 hospitals, reduce the size of their fezzes
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(148)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Four burglars nabbed when woman calls 911 after watching them in her home via live internet feed (w/video)
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(146)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
CIA to decommission "black" sites after new President reminds agency that the politically correct term is "Torturer-American"
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(138)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
One killed, six injured in pie factory explosion. Blast heard up to 3.14159265 miles away
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(101)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Last week TSG promised to make the next "photo fun" contest hard on Fark and they have delivered. Contest ends at 4pm Eastern
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(158)
 
(BDCwire)
 
 
 
No sex tax in Nevada. By the way that's not a tax on households where there is no sex, which on second thought might be stimulus we can believe in
source: wbbm780.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(Farkistan)
 
 
 
Interested in helping fellow Farkers with important scientific research? Sign up here to disprove the theorem that personal internet browsing means more productivity
source: farkistan.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(122)
 
(WCBS 880)
 
 
 
While saving energy is a worthy goal, you really shouldn't use the same heat lamps to warm both your baby's bedroom and your marijuana plants
source: wcbs880.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(C|Net)
 
 
 
Just how insecure is the electric grid? Surprisingly, thanks to utility companies' insistence on providing Internet access to critical components, the answer is "disturbingly"
source: news.cnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(97)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Student gunman shoots three at Greek college...presumably, from behind
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(CBS2Chicago.com)
 
 
 
Robber just can't handle the guilt of sticking up a Dunkin' Donuts, so he apologizes, returns the money, and tries to give the clerk a hug. It doesn't do much good
source: cbs2chicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(WCBS 880)
 
 
 
♫ Wheelchair motor running/ Get out in the hallway/ Run over your ex-wife/ and whatever comes your way ♫
source: wcbs880.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(Peterborough Evening Telegraph)
 
 
 
Lord Voldemort gets electronic tag for drunken fight
source: peterboroughtoday.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(news4jax.com)
 
 
 
Couple robbed at gunpoint for chicken, come through safely on a wing and a prayer
source: news4jax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"The opposing lawyers will take you and your ambulance-chasing counsel to the woodshed and give both of you a deserving and solid thwacking. Frankly, I'd like to watch"
source: suburbanchicagonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(MosNews)
 
 
 
Russia holds first Top Shaman elections. Really
source: mosnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Former stripper becomes a nun. Loves to talk about the Second Coming. "Now I dance for God."
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(WLWT)
 
 
 
"Carl" calls pop-radio station's confession-contest line to say he watched some guys murder bully in 1988 and dump his corpse into Ohio River. For the record, "Carl" won those Fall Out Boy tickets
source: wlwt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Two douchebags shoot Navy SEAL's dog. Lucky for them, the cops caught them before the SEAL did
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(348)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Christians complain they are being persecuted for not being allowed to persecute homosexuals
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(1183)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Three guesses as to which country has a problem with children and dental problems. The first two guesses don't count
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
Pet food company promotes Seder for dogs. Yes, it's kosher
source: weblogs.baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(17)
 
(Some Farkette)
 
 
 
Photoshop these WUT stairs
source: img17.imageshack.us   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
Man busted for making crack cocaine with a microwave. Because sometimes you can't wait for the stove to heat up
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Developers plan first solar city. The sun is there
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(KY3)
 
 
 
You've lost your license because of DWIs. Is the solution (c) travel by donkey? You bet your ass
source: ky3.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Just a tip: When you hold up a bank teller, don't write your robbery note on the back of your dad's withdrawal slip
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Vandals sabotage major telecommunications lines in SF Bay Area. I would have submitted this sooner, but I didn't have any internet access, phone service, or cell phone service, and was fresh out of carrier pigeons
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
White House attacked by terrorist bees
source: politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 
(San Francisco 49ers)
 
 
 
Just when you thought the war was over: Confederate soldier charged after accidentally shooting Union soldier with live musket round during Civil War re-enactment. Ghost of Robert E. Lee nods approvingly
source: hamptonroads.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(96)
 
(PRNewswire)
 
 
 
Baby conceived using sperm that was frozen for 21 years is healthy except for freezer burn
source: news.prnewswire.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 


Thu April 09, 2009
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Waffle House #1, which now houses a museum, has applied for historical landmark status
source: wsbradio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(97)
 
(KWTV)
 
 
 
Multiple wildfires burning in Oklahoma, thousands evacuated, hundreds of homes destroyed
source: news9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(167)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
"Scream" mask makes an appearance on bar of soap in Britain, terrifying a 27-year-old man: "I've heard of the face of Jesus in toast but this looks like a ghost"
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(72)
 
(Globe and Mail)
 
 
 
"Welcome to the he-cession, where women are the breadwinners and men hold down the fort at home"
source: business.theglobeandmail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(311)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this media circus clown
source: s.wsj.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Number 17 on the list of things you don't want to happen to you in a shopping mall: getting knocked unconcious by a suicide jumper
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(103)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
20/20 feels the need to go undercover to legally buy guns at a gun show
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(446)
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Family sues funeral home for $2.7-million after it cremates wrong body. "How could an African-American man be confused with a white woman is beyond me."
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(126)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Research shows that men's feet have been growing a whole size in the past 5 years while everything else, to the regret of many UK wives, remained the same size
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Female reporter says what husbands everywhere are thinking: Women need to stay sexy after having children
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(337)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
A glass of wine a day can lead to "the shakes", claims new study. Recommends two half glasses, to avoid spills
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 
(The Morning Call)
 
 
 
Groundhog stuck in peanut butter jar, signaling six more weeks of salmonella (pic)
source: mcall.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Hurricane researcher makes bold prediction, says 2009 season to be "average"
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Court fines woman who called her son too many times over two-and-a-half year period, prompting Jewish mothers to consult with criminal defense attorneys
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Bow ties are making a comeback. Tell Jon Stewart
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(112)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Left paralyzed after being run over by the family car? There's only one logical step to take if you're a 9-year-old: Sue dad for $26 million
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(104)
 
(Some Logical Guy)
 
 
 
"I don't want to say that gay marriage is responsible for mass murders but... gay marriage is responsible for mass murders"
source: christiannewswire.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(378)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Study finds that food-borne illnesses are on the rise in the U.S. Aw, nuts
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(82)
 
(Comedy Central)
 
 
 
Genius Kayne West: "Makin love to other gay fish"
source: southparkstudios.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(202)
 
(WTAM)
 
 
 
Because there isn't enough real crime, Cleveland cops will use their helicopter to look for after-hours skinny dippers in city pools
source: wtam.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(115)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
New terrorist report "demonizes the use of the Internet and websites like You Tube, Fark and Slashdot as terrorist tools."
source: prisonplanet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(333)
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Top 10 Things You Didn't Know About Easter... besided the whole zombie Jesus myth
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(267)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Somali women are flocking to the ports in hope of marrying a pirate, which explains why the pirates are always chanting, "Yo, hoe, yo, hoe"
source: amfix.blogs.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(133)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
You know you live in a bad part of town when you have to put up a 'This is not a crackhouse' sign
source: edmontonsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
I dvrc thee, i dvrc thee, i dvrc thee. lol kthxbye
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
No matter what you think of taxes, please stop sending tea bags to members of Congress because they keep mistaking it for anthrax. "Do not send a real tea bag to anyone."
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(207)
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Twenty-three-year-old female teacher? Check. Sex with student? Check. Eighth grade boy? Che- woah, uh, eighth grade?
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(347)
 
(ABC2News Baltimore)
 
 
 
Rescue team sent into woods after receiving call that someone was heard being tortured. That man was actually laughing at a book
source: abc2news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Scientists seek to discover why tornadoes hate trailer parks, churches & mullets
source: apnews.myway.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Teen arrested for wearing baggy pants in Florida argues in court that they're "cool", cites David Beckham and Prince Harry as proof
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(112)
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
Church promotes religious discussion series advertising slogan "No More Christians." What could possibly go wrong?
source: newsherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(487)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
The recession is hurting country clubs. EVERYBODY TELL THEIR PERSONAL ASSISTANT TO PANIC
source: online.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
Swedish transexual wins the right to call herself Immanuel after years of being told that she kant
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Ever hear the one about the Pollock who stole a role a toilet paper?
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this massive metallic mesh
source: s.wsj.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Are sweatpants ever appropriate to wear in public?
source: online.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(371)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
You Brits are just making this too easy. Hanging baskets banned from town after government decrees that watering them would be "too dangerous"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(98)
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
"You figure the thief couldn't go far carrying stolen 200-pound cast-iron storm grates. You also figure he doesn't have a degree in economics"
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Top 10 Secret Service code names. Kennedy wasn't called "Lancer" for nothing
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(164)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Angry homeowner blocks in garbage men after they refuse to pick up his trash as it was "contaminated" by five small rocks. The guy's got stones (pics)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(Daily Record (UK))
 
 
 
You know your day sucks when you're quietly riding home and someone throws a dead body at you
source: dailyrecord.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Introducing...the air-conditioned coffin (pic)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Boston Globe will go out of business unless its unions accept 20 percent pay cut and an end to seniority rules and "lifetime job guarantees." So, farewell, Boston Globe
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(170)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
By age 12, 6.5 percent of U.S students have engaged in anal sex. Submitter's wife has email
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(225)
 
(Buffalo News)
 
 
 
Making over six figures a year as a school administrator? Perhaps you shouldn't be stealing cash from the vault. The taxpayers may have zero tolerance for that
source: buffalonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
If your high school baseball coach says your team is 'snake-bitten' what else should you do but buy a snake, kill it and bury it on the field?
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man faces 84 charges, ranging from impersonating a vet to illegally castrating a pony. Say what you want, he's got balls
source: crosbyherald.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(IndyStar)
 
 
 
Police officer files lawsuit after being fired from job after 31 years on the force for declining to be tased since he had two doctor's who advised him not to do so. Don't tase me, bro
source: indystar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(244)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Man sentenced for repeatedly playing Springsteen album at an offensive volume. Or, as subby likes to call it, audibly
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(108)
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Texas lawmaker suggests that Asians adopt names that are easier to pronounce. Sum Dum Gai is not amused
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(336)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
The FBI, with nothing more important to do, finds that e-mails naming recipients to appear on the "Oprah Millionaire Contest Show" are fraudulent
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(11)
 
(11 Alive)
 
 
 
The 12th annual National Grits Festival is set to begin this weekend. In a related story, carnivals, Jiffy Lube and and Wal-Mart are expected to be shorthanded this weekend
source: 11alive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(130)
 
(HA HA HA HA no)
 
 
 
Britain discovers it has overpaid the Irish health service about €200million a year, asks Irish Government if they could please have their money back. Faint sound of laughter heard in the distance
source: rte.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(106)
 
(WTVN)
 
 
 
Woman calls it a week after getting three DUIs in six days
source: wtvn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Terrorists are kinda scary / local websites none too merry / spreading their lies and recruiting / come on out and start some shooting / C-O-M-C-A-S-T
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Snake venom is being marketed as the new budget alternative to botox, just in case cost was the main factor stopping you from injecting one of the world's deadliest toxins into your face
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
Sweden has a law requiring its national library to archive a copy of everything printed in Sweden. Surprisingly, this includes child pornography
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Thrity seven countries are joining together to figure out how to ruin the Internet
source: channelregister.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(93)
 
(Boston Herald)
 
 
 
Judge asks 'Am I Being Punk'd?' as frozen dog sperm case lands in her court
source: bostonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Flux-compression generator could take out a commercial airliner, but only if it's traveling at 88 mph
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(150)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Photoshop these men and their boat
source: inapcache.boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
"Dracula bandit" won't be seeing the light of day for at least 20 years. Sucks to be him
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(16)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Mexican President Calderon says tons of drugs couldn't enter the US without some complicity from US authorities. Thankfully, our borders are managed by morally-sound people too well paid for such insinuations
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(170)
 
(WCBStv.com)
 
 
 
Jack the cat partners with underpants gnomes, no word on step 2
source: wcbstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Scotsman)
 
 
 
New study finds fat women rarely get promoted because they're seen as pigs, while fat men get promoted more often because they're seen as jovial. Naturally, bitter fat chicks won't appreciate the joie de vivre in this this fact
source: news.scotsman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(431)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
In an effort to connect young men to God, priest organizes a cage fighting tournament on Easter Sunday. Naked Twister scheduled for Christmas
source: wwmt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(Austin Statesman)
 
 
 
School administrators change name of football stadium in fear of drug references; still mulling over what to do with the hash marks
source: statesman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(99)
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
When the cops stop you for underaged drinking, it's not a good time to inform them that you also like to smoke crack on the weekends. "And sometimes the weekend rolls into Monday."
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(21)
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 205: "Ugly....But Has a Great Personality" Difficulty: People cannot be the subject of your photo. Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(203)
 


Wed April 08, 2009
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
You may not use iTunes to "design, manufacture or produce nuclear, chemical or biological weapons". Just to clear up any confusion
source: i.gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(118)
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
A stroke of genius by the owner of a massage parlor played a hand in the arrest of a man who had the balls to use stolen credit cards. Plain-clothed dick says this investigation has a happy ending
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Man somehow manages to make his fast food meal even MORE unhealthy by shooting himself in the leg while waiting in the drive-thru
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Nanny state spends £500,000 sending veterinarians on a course...to learn how to play the bongos
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
If you believe that there are no honest people in the world, meet the woman who turned in a $357,959 cashiers check
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(98)
 
(Two Friends)
 
 
 
Photoshop two guys singing karaoke
source: i41.tinypic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
If you're heading to brief the government on a top secret anti-terror operation to arrest multiple Al-Qaeda suspects, try and make sure the press can't see the piece of paper with all their names and addresses on it
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(My Fox Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
Police report: She "is not a normal-sized 13-year-old child. She is 5'4" weighing 185 pounds and very strong." Also, she's Tasered
source: myfoxtampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(170)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Want a recession proof career? Do you like make-up? Do you like scaring children? Have we got a job for you
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Women now turning to plastic surgery to make themselves more competitive in the job market, as if having big boobs has ever gotten women anywhere
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(390)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man charged with crashing his car into a theater and with giving Fark the best mugshot of the day
source: kctv5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(187)
 
(Some Chick)
 
 
 
Man charged with arson says "he wasn't thinking" when he cleaned his apartment with gasoline and tossed a lit cigarette on a pile of gas-soaked cushions and clothes
source: justnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Worried parents now eco-proofing nurseries. They would have just wrapped the kids in bubble wrap, but Aunt Ethel forwarded an email that said Sheryle Crow said on Oprah that bubble wrap contains dioxins which can cause cancer
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
House passes bill that is "too gross to talk about." Multiple Miggs is very disappointed, even though he saw this one coming from a mile away
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(109)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Church to hold Easter services at a bar. Bloody Mary prices not nailed down yet
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(78)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Would you kill your own baby, who is doomed to die anyways, to save another? What if your baby refuses to die, putting both babies at risk? This isn't a question from your old Ethics class; it's a real problem for this Canadian couple
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(235)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
In 'Things that seemed like a good idea at the time', you can add having your high school drama students re-enact scenes from Schindler's List of Nazis shooting Jews
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
13-year-old Wyoming girl racks up $4,756 bill texting with BFF Jill. Dad: STOP! HAMMER TIME!
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(230)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
British teachers demand that wi-fi networks be removed from schools to protect the children from cancer and sterility. Clearly these people subscribe to the Gwyneth Paltrow journal of modern science
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(87)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Gay porn idol dies at 62. He is survived by his wife... wait, what?
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(218)
 
(Some Patty and Selma)
 
 
 
Colorado DMV rules that loving tofu is obscene. Submitter agrees wholeheartedly
source: coloradoindependent.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(244)
 
(Happy holiday Jewish farkers)
 
 
 
Tonight, Jews all over the world will reunite, eat bitter food, drink a lot of wine and hear their grand-parents go on and on about what happened ages ago. Why is this night different from all other nights? Because it's Passover
source: holidays.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(241)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man spends 31 years with a broken needle lodged in his buttocks. What a pain in the ass
source: newswatch50.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
Photoshop this resting risktaker
source: spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Family of teenager killed by train while listening to his iPod urge people to "never wear headphones outside whilst walking, for your own safety." Or you could open your eyes when you cross the rail tracks, it's really your choice
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(281)
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
Late for work? Try telling the boss you walked into a spider web on the way out the door and couldn't find the spider, so you had to go inside and shower again. Works every time (with top excuses list)
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(219)
 
(NBCDFW.com)
 
 
 
Surveillance cameras used to crack down on illegal dumpers. Cameras will provide police with 27 8x10 color glossy pictures with circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back of each one
source: nbcdfw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(138)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
How much do you tip the person who hands you a bag of restaurant carryout? Ten percent? Fifteen percent? A Chick tract and a hearty handshake?
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(576)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Congratulations! As part of our dedication to customer service, the game you've just bought comes with four free ecstacy tablets. Have a nice day
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(135)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
NYC cop fails cocaine test, claims it's because... *spins wheel*.... "I went down on my girlfriend"
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(137)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
The quest for blame in the recent mass killings moves on from the NRA and Rush Limbaugh to the recession, getting further away from the actual dudes who did the killing with every news cycle
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(239)
 
(WIS-TV)
 
 
 
It takes a special kind of dumb to steal a police car. This guy turned the knob to 11, and stole one so he could fix his own wrecked car
source: wistv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 
(Dallas News)
 
 
 
Texas school district considers grading snowflakes on feelings and good intentions
source: dallasnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(134)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Freedom of speech still cherished at American colleges: Readers protest anti-baseball editorial in Hillsdale College publication by decorating editor's porch with dead animals and leaving copy of paper under head of a goat (pic)
source: media.www.hillsdalecollegian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(134)
 
(Discover)
 
 
 
Suggest a tattoo for a Farker. Drew's face, streetlight, strangely absent from list
source: blogs.discovermagazine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(251)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
British women are now allowed to orgasm on the television before 11:00 p.m., most still prefer the washing machine
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(82)
 
(PlaneBuzz)
 
 
 
Lightning 1, Plane 1. Let's call this one a draw. (pics)
source: planebuzz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
In the Nanny State, paper delivery boys will now be called... media distribution officers
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Police crime scene photos of the ShamWow hooker beatdown. You can almost hear Vince lisping in photo No. 2. (Graphic warning: Lots of blood)
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(334)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Joba Chamberlain sobriety test video. Insults New Yorkers and Yankee legend Yogi Berra
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Kite surfing along the shore can be good fun. Until you get blown 15 miles off course, and five lifeboat crews, four coastguard land teams and a rescue helicopter get called out
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Another mother learns the old adage, "Never leave your keys and baby inside the same truck"
source: edmontonsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
American crew regains control of hijacked ship, one pirate in custody. U-S-A! U-S-A!
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(559)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Out-of-wedlock births hit record highs. Bastards
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(188)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
What is best in life? To crush Republicans, to see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentations of their women. "Barack the Barbarian: Quest for the Treasure of Stimuli" to hit comic-book shelves near you
source: blogs.dailymail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(313)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Someone's greasy black balls were found on a CA beach
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
What's more awkward than your mom finding your porno stash?
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(311)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
The strangest pictures of horses with perms and hair extensions you'll see today and no, that's not a Sarah Jessica Parker joke
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(95)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
61 housing agencies who have been repeatedly faulted in audits for mishandling government aid to be penalized by losing out on stimulus funds. Just kidding, they're collecting a cool $300 million
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Army recruiters setting new records. Unfortunately, it's for killing themselves
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(303)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Forecast: Cloudy, with some blustery winds and a 71 percent chance of further job cuts
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Man seeks $3.5 billion from lottery corporation because of their extreme negligence. The bastards actually let him gamble in their casinos
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(93)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
News veterans fondly remember the long-ago days where anchors could report a story without breaking down in tears on TV
source: observer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(112)
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
Dumb: Firefighter responding to car crash punches victim in the face. Dumber: The firefighter is also the mayor. Fark: It's the mayor of Hollywood
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(Inventor of the Sock Safe)
 
 
 
Fear stalks the streets, apparently barefoot, as sock thief terrorizes Idaho town. With realistic graphic depiction of what the sock thief might look like
source: localnews8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
U.S. electrical grid penetrated by spies. And they don't mean suicidal squirrels this time
source: online.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(101)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Al Capone busted for tax evasion. No, this is not a repeat from 1931
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Somali pirates not affected by recession, back at work, hijack tanker with 21 Americans on board
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(286)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: The art of subtlety
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Need an "Awwww" to start your morning? Here are some piglets and tigers snuggling up together in a Thailand zoo (pics)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(News 10 ABC Sacramento)
 
 
 
California police get testy and sack two nuts who had the balls to steal Lance Armstrong's bike
source: news10.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man's heart comes to stop. Collaborate and listen, Ice saved his ass with a brand new invention
source: myfoxhouston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
The Grim Reaper: "I has a viktim. NOOOO, THEY BE STEALIN' MAH VIKTIM"
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 
(Tampa Bay Online)
 
 
 
Ch-Ch-Ch-Chia Obama yanked for being "not appropriate for sale"
source: www2.tbo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(143)
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Driver killed gas attendant because she was a witch. He hates these wiccans
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(129)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Lame superpowers
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(KXII)
 
 
 
♫ Cup is a burning thing, ♫ and it makes a fiery ring, ♫ sold by KFC, ♫ It was nuked on high for three ♫
source: kxii.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Italy lags in making buildings earthquake-resistant. Seriously, they have this one tower that's almost falling over already
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this milky mess
source: s.wsj.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Survivor found in Italy rubble, hope fading for REO Speedwagon
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
"The truth is that, when you get down to the boring, un-Rambo-ish details, it's hard to envisage a scenario in which the benefits of owning a gun for the sake of self-defence outnumber the pitfalls"
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(1024)
 


Tue April 07, 2009
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
'I was hooked on sunbeds twice a day. Then my skin fell off and I needed chemotherapy'. Darwin waits with bated breath
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(195)
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Suspected bank robber who tried to change his appearance after his heist busted when police notice shaving cream on his ear
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Today's 911 non-emergency call comes from Haltom City, TX, where woman demanded more shrimp in her fried rice. "He didn't even put extra shrimp in there."
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(98)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Not news: Father grounds daughter from going on class trip. Fark: She sues him. Uber-ultra-super-extra-wtf-fark: She wins
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(226)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
British teachers intimidated in their own homes by pupils using thought control and dark sarcasm
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(87)
 
(Forbes)
 
 
 
West Virginia kills bill mandating that restaurants provide calorie counts, decides fat and ignorant is the way to go through life, son
source: forbes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(202)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Binghamton shooter's note to TV station ended with "Have a Nice Day," tipping authorities off that man was definitely not from New York
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(135)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Helicopter pilot who was filmed receiving a "sex act" from a porn star while flying cannot get his license back. In his defense, it is called the "cockpit" for a reason
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(111)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Moose rescued from icy lake as squirrel watches on anxiously (with great pics)
source: khq.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(Buffalo News)
 
 
 
That sick patient needs to travel 100 miles for a liver transplant in the middle of a blizzard? Looks like we got ourselves a convoy
source: buffalonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Old and busted: vasectomies. New hotness: 15 minute female sterilization
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(203)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Attention parents: Your child is stupid, not dyslexic
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(136)
 
(NBC San Fran)
 
 
 
This just in: college kids are gonna smoke pot on 4/20. Guess what, it's not just one day they're gonna smoke
source: nbcbayarea.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(197)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Iran is sooooo not seeking nuclear weapons material -- you know, except for that fake Chinese company they are using to transfer that kind of stuff
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(121)
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Six tax deductions you've never heard of. If you require medical equipment such as a clarinet, you should read this article
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this kelly-colored container
source: rasmusnorlander.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(All Voices)
 
 
 
Wearing makeup can save the lives of elderly women. Submitter can't think of a good punchline, but your grandmother's a whore
source: allvoices.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
"The most powerful people on the Internet don't work for Microsoft, Google or the government. Rather, they're a bunch of antisocial, foul-mouthed, clever nerds"
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(432)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
"Given that the curry is a UK national dish, we should be developing our own indigenous curry workforce"
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(Seacoastonline.com)
 
 
 
Man robs bank so his girfriend "won't have to have sex for money any more." She's doing it wrong
source: seacoastonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
The proportion of Americans who think religion "can answer all or most of today's problems" is now at a historic low
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(686)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Boston students struggle with the "English only" rule in school, and that's coming from native Bostonians
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(104)
 
(The Tennessean)
 
 
 
Nashville teacher arrested on charges of secretly filming students having sex (with "I can't believe such a normal guy would do such a thing" pic goodness)
source: tennessean.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(250)
 
(Breitbart.com)
 
 
 
Japanese porn even has its tentacles in British government websites
source: breitbart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Liverpool council announces that the ghost haunting Croxteth Hall is former Earl of Sefton, according to paranormal experts, not Vince Clortho, keymaster of Gozer as previously suspected
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(78)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Brigham Young University forced to trash 18,000 newspapers after typo. Turns out there really is a difference between 'apostles' and 'apostates'
source: regrettheerror.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(109)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Boston to cabbies: Go green by 2015 or else. Cabbies to Boston: But what about the city's fleets of busses and cars? Boston to cabbies: Shut your whore mouth
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(125)
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Dave Barry asks the question all men have been dying to ask women...why decorative pillows?
source: blogs.herald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(235)
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
Florida city wants to ban oil, mud, and Jello wrestling. "The term 'buttocks' shall mean the area at the rear of the body which lies between two imaginary lines running parallel to the ground when a person is standing."
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(162)
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
The dumbest infomercial product ever: the Jumpsnap, a ropeless jump rope
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(185)
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
Publisher's Clearing House scam is targeting your grandma with the "deposit this check and send back half" scam. With pic of check and letter
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(104)
 
(Den Of Geek)
 
 
 
Ten Star Wars characters with more history than you'd think - including the prostitutes of Mos Eisley
source: denofgeek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(287)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
♫ Who can take your trash out? Stomp it down for you? Shake the plastic bag and do the twisty-thingy too? The Garbage Man can. ♫ ♪ Unless, of course, there's a plastic plant pot in it, then it's just too dangerous
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(SILive)
 
 
 
Hey judge, if you won't let me change my name to Black Cream Allah, how about Original Kreeam Shabazz?
source: silive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(99)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Shockingly enough, a women only office isn't automatically all sweetness and light and female-bonding over that lovely pair of shoes you bought yesterday
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(573)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Ritalin could help obese people lose weight, finally finish reading the Great Gatsby
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(106)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
First gay marriage was legal in Massachusetts, then Connecticut, then Iowa, now it's moving on to Vermont. Yeeeeeeaaaaarrggggh
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(862)
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
For PBS, "Sometimes it's symphony tickets. Sometimes it's museum passes. This time, it's squirrel underpants"
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(C|Net)
 
 
 
Not news: Kid steals car stereo. News: His cellphone spontaneously calls the cops while he brags to his friends. Fark: He's still holding the stereo when the cops triangulate the signal and pick him up
source: news.cnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
If your Doctor tells you that he needs to rub your boobs to check if you're pregnant, you should probably believe him. He has a medical degree and everything
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(Foobies)
 
 
 
Bad weather forces German leader to abandon war zone. This is not a repeat from 1944
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(17)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Rare megamouth shark caught in Phillipines. It was delicious
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(11 Alive)
 
 
 
Those in Atlanta that are suffering from the economic crisis take comfort in knowing they can rely on Atlanta's mass transit for their commute. ...oh crap
source: 11alive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(191)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Now remember kids: If your most recent picture is underneath the word "WANTED", you might want to send a friend to the post office for stamps
source: timesleader.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Purdue students petition to make campus laws on marijuana the same as laws for alcohol. Local pizza joints fully supportive of the initiative
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
Study finds that triathalons are deadlier than marathons. EVERYBODY PANIC, FREAK OUT, AND BE FRIGHTENED
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Hussein back in Baghdad
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(354)
 
(thefrisky.com)
 
 
 
Porn Screening Canceled At University Of Maryland
source: thefrisky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Dallas News)
 
 
 
Pentagon shifts focus from high-maintenance F-22's to cheaper F-35's. Subby's focus still locked on trashy 36-DD's
source: dallasnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(253)
 
(Some Maineiac)
 
 
 
A father and son were shocked... SHOCKED while cutting down trees near the power lines
source: morningsentinel.mainetoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
A friend is someone who will come and bail you out after a night in jail, a real friend is someone who won't bite your penis off after an argument
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Consumer Reports: save up to $130 a year by switching toilet paper. Save even more by using the magazine itself
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(185)
 
(WPXI.com)
 
 
 
Man takes car to dealership for servicing, takes shortcut through showroom, over employee's desk
source: wpxi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
Photoshop these tousled tresses
source: spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
If you want that A+, study, work hard and pay attention in class. Or go to a private school that guarantees you'll get a specific grade as soon as the cheque clears. Whatever works for you
source: parentcentral.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(101)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
This little piggie went to the market. This little piggie stayed home. This little piggie was dressed in body armor, strapped to a Humvee simulator and blown-up with explosives all the way home
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(136)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Swedish cops' six-month investigation into kidnapped children has no leads. Australian father takes leave from work, finds them in seven days. That's some nice work, Lou. Bonus: All he needed was a rental car and some binoculars
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(125)
 
(CBS13.com - CBS Sacramento)
 
 
 
O.J. Simpson's sister dies. O.J. prepares alibi
source: cbs13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
French hospital performs face, hand transplant, making facepalms a whole lot easier
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Sick of people parking in front of your driveway? One German man has the solution
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Legalization of drugs such as marijuana could save Britain £14 billion a year, force citizens to have daily conversations with stinking hippies who want to know if they've ever REALLY looked at their hand, man
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(196)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Schindler's list turns up in Australia, where Hitler was born and where he first organized the Third Reich
source: belfasttelegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
In order to get more business, pain clinics in Florida lure patients with $25 gasoline cards, two-for-one pill specials and half-price days. "Florida is embarrassing itself"
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Daily Overlook)
 
 
 
Photoshop these happy... um, Hawaiians?
source: dailyoverlook.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Woman borrows boss' Ferrari. Since this is Fark, you know what happens next
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(179)
 


Mon April 06, 2009
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Politicians, celebrities call for National Beer Day. Finally there's a campaign all of Fark can get behind
source: theherald.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Not news: Precious snowflake pulled from dance school. Fark: Because school plans dance recital to Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny Yellow Polka Dot Bikini. Ultra Fark? Mom thinks song promotes "bad body image"
source: ca.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(117)
 
(JSOnline)
 
 
 
It's a bird.. It's a plane...no, it's a stolen Cessna being pursued by two F-16 fighters flying over Illinois by a student pilot who refuses to contact air traffic control
source: jsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(252)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Sheriff against red light cameras "We already have enough invasion of our privacy"
source: journal-news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(156)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Wisconsin is asking people to refrain from feeding squirrels at the state Capitol because they might inadvertently harm a child with a peanut allergy
source: ydr.inyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(138)
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
If you're a teacher going out of town, make sure your subsitute knows the difference between the "Geography Presentations" and "Porn Movies" folders on your computer
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Facebook, a girl in Maryland, the White House, the British Embassy and local police work together to stop an attempted suicide in the UK
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(104)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Recently uncovered WWII documents reveal that racist U.S. and British military leaders ensured black soldiers were excluded from French units scheduled to liberate Paris from Nazis
source: