Do you have adblock enabled?
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.
You might try our Headline Search for easier navigation here.
These links may be stale and generate errors. Can't do much about it. Tastes like chicken.
Sun February 22, 2009
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(CBS3.com)
 
 
 
MOM, I told you not to call me while I'm robbing houses
source: cbs3.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buffalo News)
 
 
 
Westboro asshats showing up at memorial services for Continental Flight 3407 victims, dozens of counter-protestors shield mourners
source: buffalonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTAM)
 
 
 
ALMOST no one puts Baby in a corner
source: wtam.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
The stabbee becomes the stabber...gets all stabby and kills robber
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Magic Dust found sprinkled all over Disneyland, causes terrorism lockdown. Tinkerbell held for questioning
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Man breaks his own world record by smashing 47 watermelons with his head. Suck it, Gallagher
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oscars.com)
 
 
 
Will Slumdog Millionaire strike it rich? Will Kate Winslet finally get a stiff little man to put between her two Golden Globes? It's your 81st Annual Academy Awards thread
source: oscars.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
A sleeping bag that looks like a bear might seem like a great idea, unless a bear tries to mate with you. Or as furries would call it, "dying and going to heaven"
source: weirduniverse.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Stimulus package contains $8B for high speed rail, meaning a bullet train between Chicago and Vegas. Thats stimulus we can believe in
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Japanese hospital apologizes for implanting wrong fertilized egg in patient, hopes she'll get ova it
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KnoxNews)
 
 
 
Tennessee loves to exploit their dogs. Don't believe me? Knoxville came up with a festival for dogs called "Mardi Growl". Just throw a few beads and they show you 8 tits
source: knoxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this formation
source: tawbaware.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Contra Costa Times)
 
 
 
DoD grants $1.9 million to study facial expressions. After reading first line of article, subby applies for grant to study the danger of bullets to the head
source: contracostatimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Geno's World)
 
 
 
You ever wonder who actually falls for those Nigerian scam e-mails? A little bank called Citibank did....to the tune of $27 million
source: genosworld.blogspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Giggity University study shows 77% of women say that their sex life was at its best in their 40s; "It's one of the best-kept secrets of women's lives"
source: brisbanetimes.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
In turnabout, UK top snooper, having called a rental, verily rented from her sister, her permanent home at which she rarely did reside, was henceforth outed, by neighbors none too happy
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Recession)
 
 
 
When will the recession end? Sometime mid-year, according to Fed models that have accurately predicted the past 7 recessions
source: seekingalpha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Newspaper)
 
 
 
Federal government buys new police cars and radar guns for police chief, arrests him after he uses them to run speed traps
source: thenewspaper.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
When they raised cigarette taxes, few complained. When they raised liquor taxes, few complained. When they raise gas taxes, brace yourself for the howling of the masses eager for blood
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(1010WINS)
 
 
 
St. Patrick's Day pub crawl forced to change its name after someone finds it objectionable. In other news, apparently there IS an Irishman out there without a sense of humor and who doesn't like to drink
source: 1010wins.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Japanese boy sleuth leads police to porn thief. That never happened to Encyclopedia Brown
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Having addressed all crime and social ills, NYC turns the full power of its government against the scourge of: idling cars
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
McDonalds employee filing workmans comp for getting shot at work while trying to stop a woman from being assaulted is told, and we quote, "to go fark himself"
source: fox16.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jacksonville.com)
 
 
 
Seaman shooters arrested
source: wire.jacksonville.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
South Korea calls for nuke-free peninsula. Penisula
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reading Eagle)
 
 
 
Cooking oil catches fire in your pan. Do you c) try to carry the flaming pan to another room?
source: readingeagle.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some model)
 
 
 
Photoshop this cameraman and his wheelie thing
source: peter-sand.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Quick, can you name the fifteen emptiest cities in America?
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Pakistan official kidnapped in Swat Valley. If only there was some specialized police unit that could be called out to rescue him
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KATU)
 
 
 
In Soviet Russia, hot girl moves to Oregon where she turns a routine DUI arrest into a police standoff. With pic
source: katu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
In today's tough economic climate, a Queens Catholic church is happy for any donation, no matter how small. Just kidding - the cheapskates who only give a buck or two are being outed in their weekly newsletter
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Richmond Times-Dispatch)
 
 
 
If you're an assistant attorney general carrying weed wrapped in a Christmas present, don't do it in February with a gun in your van. Professor Plum unavailable for comment
source: timesdispatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Caption this image of Kristin Kreuk kicking ass
source: img25.imageshack.us   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The City Paper)
 
 
 
Old and Busted : "Video Games made me do it." New Hotness: "NASCAR made me do it"
source: nashvillecitypaper.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Meet the sperm donor for Octomom...he's the Riddler
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Dating world reaches a new low: Captain Save-a-Ho arrested for bein' a pimp
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
Panera Bread cordoned off by bomb squad after someone discovers a transient electric guitar player's homemade power device
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Life and death as a 25-year-old obituary writer with platinum hair and stiletto heels (w/ pics)
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
W stocks up on flashlights, batteries, and lube at local hardware store. Does he know something we don't?
source: fe17.story.media.ac4.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News Of The World)
 
 
 
Doctors warn: being drunk for three months straight can be hazardous to your health
source: newsoftheworld.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
NAACP calls for firing of New York Post cartoonist. Doesn't care if they hire some monkey to replace him
source: us.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Rise, Sir Osis of the liver
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this flight sim somewhere more interesting
source: flightsimulatorcenter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Man decides to go bungee jumping, thinks there's nothing wrong with the cord. Frayed knot.
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat February 21, 2009
(KSBI)
 
 
 
Even though nobody's doing it yet, it will be illegal in Oklahoma to get your eyeballs tattooed. Emo kids given yet another reason to hate life
source: ksbitv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Six minutes of Santa Cruz City Council public comments. Blue Shirt girl has taken the rambling pointless answer title from 2007 Miss Teen South Carolina
source: wimp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Dear TSA, I'm unarmed. Sincerely, Naked in Tulsa
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this stuck dog
source: flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Pakistan hopes Taliban will continue cease-fire after essentially giving them control of region, hopes mouse won't ask for anything more after giving him a cookie
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Man killed with crossbow after quarrel
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangkok Post)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Catholic Priest sex scandal. New Hotness: Buddhist Monk sex Scandal. So, would that be Monk, he see - Monk, he do?
source: bangkokpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Stop
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Samaratin)
 
 
 
Man finds hundreds of dollars in a Goodwill, solicits media to help him find the rightful owner. Owner steps forward, offers man reward; man gives the reward to owner of an assisted living center
source: qconline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Times Argus)
 
 
 
Having solved all other issues, Vermont lawmakers debate whether citizens have the right to dry their clothes outside. In other news, it gets warm enough in Vermont to hang clothes
source: timesargus.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
8... 9... 10. 10 new Catholic saints to be canonized this year, ah ah ah
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Today's "teenage girl charged with 'child pornography' charges for taking, emailing nude pics of herself" story comes from Pennsylvania. Can't they just have sex with their teachers instead? It's safer
source: wearecentralpa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Ugly-ass Colobus monkey born at Calgary Zoo (w/pic), immediately starts work on Canadian stimulus programme
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
Scientists want to use "ball lightning" as a weapon. What could possibly go wrong?
source: blog.wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
It's World Banana Day. Don't let this one slip you by
source: worldbananaday.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
When an unmarked police car cuts you off in traffic, waving your gun at him is probably a bad idea
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lexington Herald Leader)
 
 
 
Eastern Kentuckians angry at top-rated "20/20" report that portrayed Appalachia as hive of people with missing teeth, mired in hopeless poverty, and strung out on drugs
source: kentucky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buffalo News)
 
 
 
News: Man jailed for weapons posession after bringing a loaded revolver to a hospital ER Fark: Man was brought to ER by ambulance after being found unconscious
source: buffalonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Today's "female teacher arrested for sex with a male student story" is from . . . throws dart at map . . . North Carolina. (With pic that proves that teenage boys will sleep with anything.)
source: indexjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Leaser)
 
 
 
Ohio lawyer beats traffic cam law by arguing non-ownership of leased cars
source: newsnet5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Woman sues Yahoo when a search for her own name brings up porn, spam. Sucks to be you, Penny Sinlargement of Viagra Falls, Wisconsin
source: searchengineland.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Shades of blue
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Finally a poll question with real significance: would you rather live in a neighborhood with more McDonald's or more Starbucks?
source: fe4.story.media.ac4.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
South Korean woman sets new world record after singing non-stop for 76 hours, or as we call it, 1.5 Grateful Dead concerts
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Submitter has a feeling there will be a followup to this story: Man nearing 100 drives 90-mile commute
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Old and busted: breaking up via text message. New hotness: getting dumped on Twitter
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
...so here's an otter with a camcorder on its stomach
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Whistling orangutan impresses zoo researchers, nearby construction workers
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Chattanoogan)
 
 
 
Remember the Tennessee cop who shoved the 71-year-old Wal-Mart greeter to the floor? Turns out the apple didn't fall far from the tree
source: chattanoogan.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Tjsflshodw
source: abc.daytonsnewssource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Louisiana Governor: "Thanks for the millions in stimulus $$ for unemployment bennies. OK if we use it instead to fix the roads?"
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AskMen)
 
 
 
Top ten unsolved modern mysteries. Why people watch Fox News mysteriously absent
source: askmen.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Competition for this year's strangest book title is down to six finalists. "Curbside Consultation of the Colon" is fingered to win it in the end
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
It's a long list, but if you bet on Dervishes to be the next religion to be targeted in Iran, you'll be just dizzy with this next article
source: rferl.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Chick)
 
 
 
Father and son rescue kitten from recycling bin. With Happy Caturday pic
source: dailyecho.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
The original Mr. and Mrs Clowncar weigh in on this Suleman upstart: "God's given ours one or two at a time and we've kind of done it the old-fashioned way." Oh, it is on
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Whatever you do, don't bop the flow to The Man's old lady
source: sheboyganpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS13.com - CBS Sacramento)
 
 
 
Police prepare to make arrest in Chandra Levy case. Statute of limitations expired on the followup tag
source: cbs13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
"Since the economy began to crater, Americans have looked inward to their very bodily fluids for a boost, selling blood, semen, even their ovaries and hair for a few extra dollars"
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Financial Times)
 
 
 
Just one more thi---GAAAAAHHHH
source: ft.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Chick)
 
 
 
If you are going to poach don't be stupid and post a picture of yourself and the 15-point buck you've killed illegally on a Division of Wildlife Web site
source: abc.daytonsnewssource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Badly-chosen product spokespersons
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Police officers hospitalized after being doused with a disgusting subtance with an "unusual smell", released when it was found to be HP Sauce
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
Guy tries to kill himself with carbon monoxide poisoning in another man's garage, winds up with felony burglary charges instead. That ought to cheer him up
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Space.com)
 
 
 
NASA wants people to vote for the Space Station's new room name. Write in votes accepted as well. What suggestions do you Farkers have?
source: space.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
When you bring your bag of stolen nickels to the bank to change them to paper money, try to remember to remove your gun from the bag first
source: ydr.inyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri February 20, 2009
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Trying to go to church in the nude? That's a tasering
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Caturday takes a somber tone this week as America says goodbye to Socks, aged 20, President Clinton's cat
source: today.msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
The recession has created a new social grouping: baby gloomers, who have to support both their parents and their children
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
A fisherman and a teenager save exhausted dolphins trapped in an ice hole for over a week. Farkin' iceholes
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Many teens feel Rihanna got what she deserved for not shutting her whore mouth. "Ha She probably did something to provoke it"
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9 News)
 
 
 
You know it's bad when there has to be a law to make kids get their asses off the couch
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Man dies while playing hide-and-seek. Police set to launch investigation in one Mississippi, two Mississippi, three Mississippi
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Greek prime minister rejects all-party government despite repeated chants of "toga toga toga"
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dictionary.com)
 
 
 
Today's Photoshop theme is brought to you by the scariest dream you ever had
source: dictionary.reference.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LBC 97.3)
 
 
 
Animal shelter discovers puppy with image of Mickey Mouse on his back. Disney lawyers immediately respond with cease and desist order
source: tampabays10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
This week's TSG roundup. There's a sale at Penney's
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
If you're lazy at work and always surfing the internet, it could anger your co-workers and make them suffer from office rage. That would... *ow, the guy next to me just punched me in the face*
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
State Department issues warning for travelers to stay away from "prostitution and drug-dealing areas" in Mexico. You know, the good parts
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
If you steal $50,000 worth of jewelry, hide it in a teaddy bear for safe keeping, and then discover it's been stolen from you, don't report it to the police. Let it go, because man, it's gone
source: seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Dumbass couple thinks they can afford a $1.5M condo on $20K income. Dumbass company sells the condo, and dumbass bank writes the mortgage. Dumbasses
source: seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Final Reminder: DC 10th Anniversary Party with Drew tomorrow at 730pm at The Black Rooster
source: blackroosterpub.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
The Best Driveway Ever
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Before you post video of your pot plant growing on YouTube, remember that the cops can watch YouTube, too. Especially if you use your real name when you create your channel
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man breaks into a medical facility to steal his buddy's urine samples that were probably going to test positive for marijuana. "That's what I call a really good friend"
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LBC 97.3)
 
 
 
The art of growing a 'stache. With pics
source: tampabays10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IndyStar)
 
 
 
A ninety pounds autistic boy having an outburst? That's a taserin'... And another one to be sure
source: indystar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Five-year-old boy climbs onto windowsill, falls out of window 20 feet up, has fall broken by laundry line, lands on concrete patio, gets up and tells his parents "I've just fallen out of the window." Ta-da
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Ceiling mice are watching you litigate
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LBC 97.3)
 
 
 
Elderly learn to fight back with cane fu. With video
source: tampabays10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(myrtlebeachonline)
 
 
 
Outraged intoxicated man claims nipple assault by woman giving him a lap dance
source: myrtlebeachonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFAA DFW)
 
 
 
Second grade teacher speeds through school zone, admits to drinking a couple of hours earlier, and nearly runs over cop trying to flee. Why? "I'm a freakin' teacher." Bonus: Audio of traffic stop
source: wfaa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ITV)
 
 
 
Reason #583 not to visit Brazil: Muggers with hand grenades
source: itv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
Turns out the ancient Greeks enjoyed a good joke. How many Spartans does it take to screw in an oil lamp? None. That job's for slaves
source: entertainment.timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Blind man receives council letter addressed to 'Mr Blindman' - at least they didn't send him a talking card
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Journal (Maine))
 
 
 
"I'm pretty sure it's the first time, in the life of that building, there's ever been a drag queen at the Legion Hall"
source: sunjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
Illinois high school to host first mixer for gay students; competition to get on the party planning committee was fierce
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(enewscouier.com)
 
 
 
Man awakens to find crochet needle "completely embedded" in his urethra. Fark: does not know how it got there
source: enewscourier.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Albany Times Union)
 
 
 
New York State spends $500,000 to purchase ferry boat, only to find out it is not seaworthy. Now attempting to sell boat on eBay. Current top bid: $14,800
source: timesunion.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Today's "female teacher arrested for sex with a male student" story comes to us from . . . draws name from hat . . . Idaho. (With "I'll bet she cleans up pretty good" mugshot goodness.)
source: kmvt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
George Mason University senior and popular drag queen wins title of school's homecoming queen, beating two women. Extra Farky: he wears size 12 pumps. (With photo of the Queen "working that Tiara")
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
Today's urine-soaked drunk driver -- complete with beer on top of truck AND in driver's hand -- is brought to you by Natural Ice
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Newspaper)
 
 
 
Red light cameras protect us from accidents that happen once every billion miles. That's a £ot of $af€t¥
source: thenewspaper.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
137 mph in a '93 Honda Civic? It's more likely than you think
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RedOrbit)
 
 
 
Study suggests that when teens are asked to turn down that racket, they usually turn it up, stay on your lawn
source: redorbit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"A Montenegrin man survived a suicide bid after buying a coffin from a funeral director, climbing in and trying to shoot himself"
source: dailytimes.com.pk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
Chicago area man still working, although he turns 100 next month, says retirement is for pussies. And get off his lawn
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop toys for ADHD kids
source: cdc.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Ugly-ass meerkat pups born at Sydney Zoo, already learning to eat grubs, say "hakuna matata"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
The coolest picture of a gorilla's head made from 30,000 matchsticks you'll see today
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KMOV St. Louis)
 
 
 
Just like any divorce - who gets the house, who gets the car, who gets the Air National Guard missile that's sitting next to the furnace. Wait, what?
source: kmov.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Grand Haven Tribune)
 
 
 
Lt. Gary Megge of the Michigan State Police has an unusual job: preventing speed traps
source: grandhaventribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
BBC censors reviewing old episodes of the Teletubbies to make sure there was never any drinking or swearing. Uh-oh, laa-laa
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BackOff)
 
 
 
If you tap your brakes or even slow down because of that jerk four inches off your ass, you could lose your driver's license under a proposed law in Maine
source: morningsentinel.mainetoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
South Asian man stopped 21 times by NYPD on subway files lawsuit. Police say they weren't using racial profiling, just that he looked suspicious entering and exiting his home subway station every single day
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Foobies)
 
 
 
Drunk driving is bad enough, but it's a whole different level of stupid when you decide to take a tank out for a joyride
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
If you want some free publicity for your TV station, just claim that Jesus was too fat to walk on water and Mary was impregnated by a school friend and let the Catholics do their thing
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Poughkeepsie Journal)
 
 
 
Auto dealership employees rescue injured swan, offer it zero-percent financing on a new minivan for 60 months and throw in deluxe floor mats for free
source: poughkeepsiejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
NY Daily News discovers a rare person, one that financial experts know exists in theory, but never has been seen in person: A person who lives on what she earns
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
If you've been convicted of impaired driving causing death and failing to remain at the scene of an accident, it's generally considered bad form to taunt the victim's family on the victim's Facebook remembrance page
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
New York Post writes apology so canned, even a trained monkey could have done it
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Whether or not it's true, you just can't go around calling your pupils retards, save that for their parents
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WYFF4.com)
 
 
 
Woman arrested for DUI in the pick-up line of her child's school. Bonus: when asked for ID, she presented a credit card
source: wyff4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Tooth decay is third most common reason children are admitted to hospitals in Britain. The Sun is there with a pic that will haunt your dreams
source: thescottishsun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Art dealer who bought painting from NY convent for $450,000 and immediately resold it for $2.2 million says it isn't his fault the nuns suck at business. Somebody's going to hell in a hurry
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wilmington Star-News)
 
 
 
Pepper spray to defuse brawl at middle school talent show. "It was unclear who, if anyone, won the talent show"
source: starnewsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Georgian scientists develop technique for harnessing energy from hamsters, you just have to make sure they're in the right gere first
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
British politicians accused of "ignoring polygamy", perhaps because they consider having two mothers-in-law to be punishment enough
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ksdk.com)
 
 
 
70-year-old man gets good and liquored up, attempts to connect digital TV converter with no luck. Mr. Samsung, meet Mr. Smith & Wesson
source: ksdk.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Onion AV Club)
 
 
 
What one book/movie would you require every high school student to read/see before they graduate? Subby would answer, but he has a term paper on "Pump Up the Volume" due in 26 minutes
source: avclub.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man found not guilty of attacking another guy after a good foursome goes bad. "When Salinas heard pleasurable sounds coming from his girlfriend, he decided to end the swap meet."
source: madison.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cleveland Plain Dealer)
 
 
 
Man slips and falls in strip club parking lot but reports it as a racial attack, not knowing about the surveillance camera. What a boob
source: cleveland.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Seattle zoo on lock down after racist New York Post metaphor for the president escapes
source: seattlepi.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Octomom now reportedly looking to buy a million-dollar home. Yeah, and submitter wants a pony
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this greenhouse
source: flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Seniors make claymation video about safe sex. GILFS
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
"Most of us are confused. We balk at paying for raw ingredients, but readily cough up for extortionate ready meals. We spend hours watching TV chefs but apparently only 13 minutes on average making a meal - down from one hour in 1980"
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Family loses their cave to foreclosure, search for housing that will accept Pebbles and Dino
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KCCI)
 
 
 
Today's "150 dogs and one Bengal tiger rescued from filthy puppy mill" story brought to you by Seneca, MO. Your dog wants - wait a second, TIGER?
source: kcci.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu February 19, 2009
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Check out the amazing image which could show the fabled sunken city of Atlantis
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Blind mechanic fixes cars using only 'the power of touch' [pic]
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Financial Times)
 
 
 
The UN discovers, to its utter shock, that Iran has enough uranium to build nukes. Why didn't anyone warn them about this before?
source: ft.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Rodents of Unusual Size? I don't think they exist... (with inconceivable pic)
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Medvedev challenges Matthew Broderick to a game of tic-tac-toe, loses, rekindles Cold War [w/ pics]
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(People's Daily)
 
 
 
That "Chinese businessman staging a best mistress contest and getting driven off a cliff" story? About as genuine as a Chinese Rolex
source: english.people.com.cn   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Wyatt Earp was a thief and a pimp and the gunfight at the OK Corral was actually a muderous ambush led by Earp
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS11tv.com)
 
 
 
Welcome to Texas, home of big hats, big trucks, and 300 pound wild pigs that we shoot from helicopters
source: cbs11tv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS4.com)
 
 
 
"I'M A SHARK, I'M A SHAAARK, SU.. *sigh* It's just not the same anymore"
source: cbs4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AFP)
 
 
 
French woman complains about yellow stars used on eBay because of association with Nazi Germany. Vichy France surrenders
source: tech.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this intrepid trio
source: flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MinnMoms.com)
 
 
 
Campbell's refines original soup recipe to reduce sodium. New version to be called "water"
source: minnmoms.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
World Scrabble record for one game (725 points) set in Phoenix. Loser still refusing to accept "kwyjibo" as a valid Scrabble word
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slooh)
 
 
 
Woman gets a hair weave by a stylist from the planet Krypton
source: nbcactionnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
Gunman to the people he's trying to rob: "Don't underestimate me because I have glasses and I'm fat"
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Parents: "Help us find our missing daughter" Police: "Meh"
source: edmontonsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Religion of peace strikes again moving Bibles to top shelf in library. Jihiii higher than you can reach
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Bad day: Your parked car gets hit by a van, pushing it up onto the sidewalk. Worse day: A meter maid gives you a $100 ticket for parking on the sidewalk
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
Russia's nuclear energy industry starts Miss Atom contest to improve their negative image (with SFW gallery of hittable nuclear plant engineers)
source: spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
A five-minute animation clip, but instead of regular animated cells, each frame is a fully developed painting. The artist took two years to draw the 6,000 necessary works of art
source: andrewsullivan.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Not counting cholesterol, Canada is #1 in Americans' hearts
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Zurich authorities say Brazilian woman definitely invented story about being attacked. They were tipped off when they found the backwards B on her cheek
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
"Sorry about the breast cancer diagnosis. You're fired"
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
A map of the potential high-speed rail lines to be built by stimulus. Where can Subby get a Northamerapass, Amerapass, Speedopass, whatever the equivalent of a Europass is?
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Austin Statesman)
 
 
 
Austin man uses drive-thru to order sandwich, is dismayed to discover that the restaurant doesn't have a drive-thru
source: statesman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Amnesty International claims it does not know whereabouts, mood, playlist of detained Egyptian blogger
source: tech.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Muslim cleric in the UK says drunks should be flogged. Government officials respond that there aren't enough whips in England
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Times)
 
 
 
RNC Chair Michael Steele says the GOP needs a "hip hop" makeover, submits design for Dick Cheney "Thug Life" t-shirt
source: washingtontimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Obama arrives in Ottawa for first international trip. Thousands of Canadians gathering for their first-ever glimpse of a black man
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Despite the economic crisis, multiple metro Atlanta homes were flipped yesterday
source: wsbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
You think you got money problems? This guy is only getting a $25,000 bonus this year
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LBC 97.3)
 
 
 
Super Colon - when you have something like this that's in your face, you can't help but talk about it
source: tampabays10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBCDFW.com)
 
 
 
100-mph car chase ends when driver stops to pay toll, use valet parking
source: nbcdfw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Do you want Judo?
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Man claims a Jack Russell terrier shot itself in the head while playing with a loaded gun on the floor. Your dog wants a gun lock
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
After 150lbs of dynamite is stolen, cops come up with a brilliant idea to crack the case: Give the thieves a demonstration of precisely how much havoc they could wreak with it
source: fe8.story.media.ac4.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Florida braces for record cold weekend temperatures (w/ helpful photo illustration of upcoming weather)
source: blogs.orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Foobies)
 
 
 
Crowley and Aziraphale take a break from their assigned duties to rob a German electronics shop
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Phelps clan banned from travelling to the UK, clearly God hates England
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
If you're confused by all of this weird language your relatives keep using, you might benefit from the new diary of granny slang
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
New laws say farms must stop smelling like farms
source: eveningsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Airport security guard wins £62,000 payout after colleague "wobbled her breasts" at him. You know how we know you're gay?
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Theme: Lame uses for cool devices
source: 4.bp.blogspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Polish workers and Irish police have a "who's dumber" contest. Guess who won?
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Wait, you mean forensic scientists don't work with million-dollar equipment in poorly-lit labs? CSI raises even judges' expectations of the practice
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Possibly the worst photoshopped 'monster' you'll see, including Nessie
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Chicago planning on installing countdown timers so people can see just how much time there is left for that green light. What could possibly go wrong?
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Webster's)
 
 
 
Rock bottom: (noun) - a state of being exemplified by not even being successful at killing yourself when jumping off a bridge, and then getting 4 years in prison for killing the police dog that was biting your arm when you jumped
source: modbee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Dunkin Donuts clerk answers complaint about slow service with a free order of slashed tires
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Meet Jennifer, she will "moan like Shamu for you"
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
"Polish Al Capone" facing 10 years in jail after making authorities a proposition they couldn't understand
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marshall Parthenon)
 
 
 
Students in West Virginia attend "etiquette dinners," learn not to use spittoon during meal, chug vintage wine from bottle, or slip shrimp scampi to hound dog under table
source: media.www.marshallparthenon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Herald Tribune (SW Florida))
 
 
 
After breaking into someone's home, try not to leave behind anything that might help identify you. Like a trail of candy wrappers leading back to your house
source: heraldtribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
City considers cracking down on crime by requiring convenience stores to install thousands of dollars worth of security equipment. Store owners wonder if the criminals are cheaper
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(This is London)
 
 
 
If you're a 15-year-old girl, your folks won't let you answer the door, and boys are ringing the bell all night... yeah, your family rented the house that use to be a brothel
source: thisislondon.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(County Press)
 
 
 
Man survives after his pickup truck is torn in half by an Amtrak train. Truck's cab completely destroyed, but "an open 40 ounce bottle of beer inside it was unscathed"
source: countypress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Apparently dissatisfied that their laser pointers have failed to cause any major airline disasters, Jersey morans have taken to launching balloon-borne red flares into flight paths
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Geno's World)
 
 
 
Sean Young gets drunk and then mocks everybody who lost money in the stock market. Papazazzi tell her they loved her in "Ace Ventura". Winner: Paparazzi
source: genosworld.blogspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Assistant math teacher in trouble for helping female students round out their figures
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
School cancels production of "Rent" because it might spread the gayness
source: dailypilot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Standing in front of the backpacker with one hand on his hip and the other on his penis, Loomes asked: "Has this ever happened to you before?"
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Can paintballs legally deter intrusive hookers?
source: blog.seattlepi.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Cops find pot under load of cows, manure. Say it was some good shiat
source: seattlepi.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
Swedish police arrest two people on suspicion of narcotics smuggling. I can has khaturday now plz?
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
There are some things you shouldn't do after rear-ending a car: trying to cover the victim's mouth as they call 911, then stripping naked and running away when the cops show up
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this chandelier
source: flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
Youngish TFette has no comprehension what her adult life would be like without the internet or computer technology. Describe your pre-internet life
source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
Video
 
A new mass transit video has surfaced that should help Chicago's bid for the 2016 Summer Olympics. (Not safe for work language)
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
Local Baptist churches around Houston help rebuild fences after Ike destroyed cattle ranches. Just kidding, it was the Amish from Indiana who came down to volunteer their help because they had been laid off from their jobs back home
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Stab)
 
 
 
This story just keeps getting better - Octuplets' home in foreclosure - Octomom wondering who's gonna buy her a house to fit her 14 kids
source: dailystab.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Store owner fatally shoots a man because he was urinating on the side of his building. People familiar with the owner say you don't have to be a whiz to know there's more to this story
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Canadian fourth-graders will no longer be graded on which races of people they would save first in an emergency, presumably because the Asians were messing up the curve
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Muskegon Chronicle)
 
 
 
Letter writer wants to know why Captain Chesley "Sully" Sullenberger didn't mention God when interviewed for 60 Minutes. Tag is for the letter writer, Thread is for the inevitable flame war
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 198: First Person Shooter. Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed February 18, 2009
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Burglar gets both barrels from vintage caretaker at winery, makes fine accompaniment for police back to hospital. Expected to make a full-bodied recovery
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
One Farker's take on Afghanistan, complete with IEDs, Herc flights that are more frightening than the Taliban and Major League Infidels: "I don't hate anyone here. Even the people I've had to shoot, I don't hate them"
source: thewhig.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Nanny State grocery store bars girl with helium balloon tied to her wrist for being "health and safety risk", then the explanation gets even more stupid
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
No one expects the giant Spanish rabbits of Caerbannog
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: The battle between the sexes
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Our long national nightmare is over - Lance Armstrong's stolen bike has been found
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
13-year-old dad Alfie Patten wears hoodie with picture of hand flipping the bird and text "I'm the daddy. If I'm not, fark you all, I'll still be there". Isn't it touching to know baby Maisie has such a classy father?
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buffalo News)
 
 
 
Signs it's time to stop flying small planes: #1. You're 80 years old; #2. Your plane just crashed into an apple tree; #3. The plane took off without you in it
source: buffalonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Director of Indiana VA hospital takes down framed newspaper proclaiming "Japs Surrender", which had been hanging there since 1945, because a new employee complained about it
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
You know that whole "put your money in Swiss bank accounts because they won't release your identity to tax authorities" thing? Not so much
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
News: Man walks into Crystal Cathedral, hands a note to a greeter and promptly marches up to the altar to commit suicide. Fark: While another volunteer was telling the seven tourists about their suicide prevention ministry
source: latimesblogs.latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Employees at Leeds hotel get $250 billion tip. "We thought we'd won the jackpot and imagined how we'd spend it." Until they realized they were Zimbabwean dollars
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Shoddy forensics? In my courtroom? It's more likely than you think
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Car crashes through living room wall, followed by a second car, all occupants storm into house, and then things get hammery
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Religious school teacher asks 10-year-olds to write down rudest words they can think of and rate their offensiveness. Surprisingly, some parents don't think this is the greatest f*cking idea since God whacked Eve in the c*nt with a hatchet
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Nerve)
 
 
 
Fake vampires are totally pissing off real vampires (also O-Negative "tastes like dessert wine")
source: nerve.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Huge cockfighting ring busted by authorities outside Toronto. Police chief says he hadn't seen so many cocks fighting since the last Leafs-Habs game
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
With the rest of God's work completed, the Vatican has figured out that men like to eat, have sex and laze around while women prefer to hate each other
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Man takes SUV to mechanic to find out why the gas gauge always read half-full and finds 35 pounds of pot hidden in tank, which explains why the car kept veering toward the curb whenever he passed a Taco Bell
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pittsburgh Post-Gazette)
 
 
 
Muslim students in Pittsburgh told to ditch their kaffiyehs, or at least get one with a Steelers logo, which would be okay
source: post-gazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Now that the stimulus package has passed, it is time for the obligatory "Things $787B could buy" article
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reading Eagle)
 
 
 
College promotes Black History Month by posting "White" and "Colored Only" signs on water fountains and dining halls. What could possibly go wrong?
source: readingeagle.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
One in three students feels they deserve a 'B' grade just for showing up to class. No surprise, since one in three submitters feels they deserve a greenlight just for showing up to Fark
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kansas City)
 
 
 
Meet John, a professional sign shaker
source: kansascity.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Two United planes touch wings at O'Hare airport; first plane later seen buying flowers and a box of chocolates
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Thieves break through the walls of an adult store to steal x-rated movies. Wouldn't it be easier just to get an internet connection?
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Time Magazine answers the question that's been on everyone's mind: Why Chimps Attack. Turns out it's because they're chimps, and that's what chimps do. Chimps
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Dianne Sawyer interview with author of fake holocaust "memoir". His defense: ""No it didn't actually happen in reality, but it's not a lie, because I believe it happened in my imagination"
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Not news: Woman spends years trying to have an affair and fails. News: Her husband feels ignored, has his own affair, eventually dumps the wife for his mistress. Fark: She feels "betrayed"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: If everyone had superpowers
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seacoastonline.com)
 
 
 
Police knew he wasn't a real cop because real cops don't smash car windows and steal MP3 players and 22 bags of frozen shimp
source: seacoastonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kansas City)
 
 
 
Hispanic family in America sues over Catholic school's English-only policy. Dios mios
source: kansascity.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Nola.com)
 
 
 
African wildcat found in backyard of New Orleans home. No word yet on if he had a gun
source: nola.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Office secretary called a "whore" and made to clean out the company's men's room awarded $13,000 compensation. That's one expensive dirty whore
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Survey finds that teens would rather give up sex than music. The fact that both are available for free on the internet renders the study moot particularly as sex is still cheaper than music
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
In Pittsburgh if you're a landlord who rents to drug dealers and users, public drunks, and bad neighbors, the city will bill you for public safety calls to your properties
source: post-gazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tampa Bay Online)
 
 
 
Glib mom sues Church of Scientology for taking away son's schizophrenia meds and giving him a loaded gun
source: www2.tbo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Guy pays his $4,079 property tax bill with 11 sacks of coins. "I'm sorry to put you through this, but I don't have any other way to protest"
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
British train company issues female staff see-through tops. Would it surprise you to learn a few people have a problem with this?
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHNT-TV)
 
 
 
Small-town TV station throws journalistic credibility out the window with Jesus-in-a-rock news story. Unfortunately, rock too large to sell on eBay for profit
source: whnt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Woman falls for the old "psst, I'm really a secret agent sent to prevent your boss from poisoning you with anthrax powder" trick
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
In the middle of America's deepest recession, the US Mint has issued four new pennies. Someone tell them we'll need more than that
source: latimesblogs.latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
A visit to one of the nation's largest sports shows: "I think people are stressed out about the economy and just want to go out and shoot something."
source: online.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Expatica)
 
 
 
French city broadcasts the real Brown Note
source: expatica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Poughkeepsie Journal)
 
 
 
Today's teacher sex-scandal comes to you courtesy of Beacon, New York - with "even the sharp-knees guy could have done better" pic
source: poughkeepsiejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Airline pilot is asked to remove his shoes and belt at airport security checkpoint, instead drops his pants and says "search this"
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Register)
 
 
 
West Midlands cafe wins "Britain's best bacon sandwich" prize. In other news, there is a man in England who's job was to travel the country eating bacon
source: theregister.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The News Tribune)
 
 
 
Dear Mom: In jail for vehicular homicide. Oh, and I shot at a herd of deer with a machine gun. Love, Your Son
source: thenewstribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(DFW Star-Telegram)
 
 
 
Jury awards man who developed a staph infection at hospital and lost both arms and legs $17.7M. Court cuts the award in half
source: star-telegram.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
When stealing several packs of smokes, make sure you have one hand free to hold up your droopy drawers. And since it's Florida, make that droopy jorts
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCPO)
 
 
 
Step1: Steal firefighting equipment from work. Step 2: Sell items on ebay. Step 3: Profit. Step 4: Be arrested for Step 1
source: wcpo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
Study finds that teens who skip breakfast and dislike their mothers have sex earlier than other teens. In other news, there are teens that eat breakfast, like their mothers
source: canada.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Go get him, Tiger)
 
 
 
Things get a little rough when a man gets teed off over bad manners, but not enough to handicap him. Mulligan
source: masslive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Behold, the Farkiest temple ever built by the hands of man
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Go on a four-hour bender and fall onto the tracks in front of an oncoming train? Congratulations - you're a multimillionaire
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Teacher gets four year scholarship to PMITA University for taking his student's virginity, tries to end it by having break-up sex in the school's bathroom closet
source: brisbanetimes.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man's penis gets caught in a grinder, hasn't felt anything like this since his divorce
source: brisbanetimes.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
If you've ever wanted a pair of crotchless flannel panties, maple syrup scented lube, an authentic Amish ball gag or a old-fashioned corncob strap-on you're in luck: the Vermont Country Store has started selling sex toys
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Journal (Maine))
 
 
 
Signs, signs, radioactive signs. Talking about the ones that Wal-Mart can't find. There's this: They're not that bad, the radioactive signs
source: sunjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
After 23, "it gets lonely"
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Three-year olds in New York grow up so fast. One minute they're at McDonalds eating a Happy Meal and the next thing you know they're riding the subway by themselves
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Geronimo's descendants sue Skull and Bones club for return of their ancestor's remains. Also ask that we yell something else when jumping out of airplanes
source: yaledailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Many identities. One survivor
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man makes a shotgun sound and pumps his adjustable cane in order to scare off some kids who were singing near his home. Good thing they weren't on his lawn. "If you don't shut up I'm going to shoot you all in the head."
source: kitsapsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
"Somewhere out there is a Florida black bear that's just got to hate humans"
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Erotica for robots
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Game Warden: Hey Jack, want to see something cool? I can grab a lion's balls without being eaten. Fark: Doesn't get eaten, but does grab a lion's balls (with pic)
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Man finds his dentures washed up on the beach two days after losing them while surfing. "They're sharper I noticed, truly."
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Meet the man who eats everything (except your Mom)
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Meet England's worst driver. And not just because she drove on the wrong side of the road
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Earth Times)
 
 
 
The Indonesian in the Cupboard
source: earthtimes.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sound and Motion)
 
 
 
My boy's a box. Damn you, a box
source: livenews.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSAZ West Virginia)
 
 
 
The fact that the fire hydrant was an ornament is one thing. The fact that it took firefighters 15 minutes to figure this out is Fark
source: wsaz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
There are five types of orgasm. The positive ("Oh YES"), the negative ("oh NO"), the Religious ("oh GOD"), the fake ("oh SUBBY"), and the one where you call out the wrong name and get strangled
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(4Utah.com)
 
 
 
Utah State Senator: "Gays are probably the greatest threat to America." Failed banks, foreclosed homes, global warming, and al-Qaeda unimpressed
source: abc4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsday)
 
 
 
If you happen to be in market for a life-size T-Rex, someone would like to have a word with you
source: newsday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue February 17, 2009
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
If you've been flashing motorists along Iowa Hwy 78, put it away man, it's cold out there. And the police would like a word with you
source: thehawkeye.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
In an effort to get students to graduate in four years, Mercer University offers to pay tuition for students who go over that deadline. I forsee a lot more people going to college for seven years
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Homeowners have found a way to bring the foreclosure process to a screeching halt: Ask to see the original mortgage
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Hitler stuffed himself on cake, suffered from gas, and had poor table manners. Just in case you need more reasons not to like him
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Bogus health care or beauty products
source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Megachurch campus pastor resigns for "sexual impurity"
source: chicagobreakingnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Crooks & Liars)
 
 
 
Bill O'Reilly says he doesn't have to apologize for calling Helen Thomas a witch because a poll on billoreilly.com says that he doesn't have to
source: crooksandliars.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Ten Jewish women, ranging in age from 89 to 96, prepare for their bat mitzvahs, as they were unavailable in their communities when they turned 12. It's old Jews - it's Fark.com
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Old and busted: "Tickle-Me Elmo". New hotness: "Smash-Me Bernie", a steal at just $99.95
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sum Guy)
 
 
 
Spelling bee may be canceled due to budget cuts. EVERYBODY PANIK
source: denver.yourhub.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
How the mellow voice of Nancy Grace soothes our souls during these trying times
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WWSB ABC 7)
 
 
 
Apparently we owe Mark David Chapman an apology, according to this crazy man who knows which famous author REALLY killed Lennon (video of city commission rant included)
source: mysuncoast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Allergic Girl Uses Peanut Sniffing Dog. As opposed to every other dog that sniffs your ...Oh peanuts, my bad
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Amy Fisher is embarking on a multiple-city strip club tour as a high-paid stripper. "I am going to take this road until my fans tell me, 'Dear, please put your clothes back on. You're too old.' "
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
From the "Drew called it" department: A look at some of the people killed in the Buffalo plane crash
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
"I apologize to you now if you ever stayed in one of my rooms. You deserved better. But if housekeepers were paid more than minimum wage-and the tips were a bit better-I might have cleaned your toilet rather than just flushed it"
source: travel.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Dentist charged for filling minor cavities
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOL)
 
 
 
Man strips, handcuffs, and gags woman, puts her in diaper, and reads bible to her for three days. Or, as submitter calls it, foreplay
source: wtol.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Not news: Boy writes essay for school. Still not news: about his Dad. Fark: and the time his dad shot him with a BB gun because he was blocking the TV
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Teen boy kept locked in bathroom for years, beaten with clarinet. Unlike submitter's teen years in a locked bathroom, which were voluntary and involved a beating of a different woodwind
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Spike)
 
 
 
Top 11 Songs to Pump Iron to. What no Cher?
source: spike.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 5)
 
 
 
Health tip: If the doctor's office is at "Holiday Inn Express Motel in meeting room on the first floor," he might not be a real doctor
source: wlwt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
14 year old girl arrested and charged with disorderly conduct after she was caught text-messaging in class
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
Trucks spill burgers and beer all over Utah's highways, proving there might be a God after all
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
Residents of mobile home park upset that they have just a couple of weeks to move out to make way for a new Super Wal-Mart store. Talk about biting the hand that feeds you
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
California geography professor consults complex mathematical models, satellite imagery, and his rectum to find Osama bin Laden
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCCO.com)
 
 
 
Woman everywhere finally have the equality they deserve... they can now pee standing up
source: wcco.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Antiguan businessman, cricket impresario Sir Allen Stanford charged with "massive ongoing fraud" worth over $8 billion. Bernie Madoff sniffs, calls him an amateur
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Cat takes break from busy day of sleeping and sunbathing to alert owner that he has lung cancer
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Comatose Guy)
 
 
 
His family tearfully gave the OK for physicians to disconnect life support. That's when he woke up
source: nctimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Of all the things you can say to police responding to an emergency call at your home, "Give me your gun so I can shoot my son and my wife" probably isn't the most intelligent
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Woman calls the cops on a goat that walks into her home and starts eating her chocolate cake. "I feel sorry for the lady, but it is kind of funny"
source: madison.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Post Star)
 
 
 
The best mugshots you'll see today of two dumbasses busted for "extensive graffiti"
source: poststar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
Photoshop this athlete and his supporter
source: spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
New recession-busting, 120-zipper dress can be made into a gown, a miniskirt, a halter top, a hat, a broach, or a pterodactyl. The Sun is there with pics
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
CNN's top five must-see locations that global warming will soon turn into inhospitable wastelands. Great Barrier Reef: Check. Alpine Glaciers: Check. Amazon rain forest: Check. New Orleans, Louisiana?
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
Coffee: the delicious, refreshing, sweet, wonderful, addictive, caffeinated beverage that may or may not kill you
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LBC 97.3)
 
 
 
Remember all of those cute smiling strippers picked up in a Pasco lunchtime bust that started it all? Five years later - the progression of a stripper. With pics
source: tampabays10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Fred Phelps family to visit Britain to protest against anti-homophobia, wag finger at "goofy queen's adulterous whore of a son." God hates cigarettes
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
When even the former head of MI5 thinks the United Kingdom is a police state, you know it's bad
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Now that credit card companies have adopted a "we'll charge whatever we want and make up fees as you go" pricing model, some government officials want to take a closer look at them
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Soldier, if Uncle Sam wanted you to have one dead and one unconscious 16-year-old girl in your barracks, he would have issued you one
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Lambs headbutting eagles, just another day in the Scottish Highlands
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
17-year-old thinks he's got a good chance to be his town's next mayor because he's already raised $250 for his campaign, and has the backing of a landlord and the managers of a local convenience store and burger joint
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS4Denver - KCNC)
 
 
 
'Snow artists' pay tribute to Obama on day of his visit in Colorado with 100 foot wide image they stomped into the snow
source: cbs4denver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Store says glass ended up in ground beef after wall clock fell on the floor in Meat Department. You really don't want to know how the glass got from the floor into the actual meat
source: edmontonsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Large stockpile of unexploded weapons in Gaza disappears before UN can dispose of them. Three guesses who was supposed to be "guarding" them
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Beaver spotted in Detroit after a 75 year absence. Who knew the motor city was such a sausage-fest?
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Man who tased himself is shocked to hear his own lawyer describe him as a real life Homer Simpson
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Coolest Vicar ever fights to keep local brothel open
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTBS)
 
 
 
Think you had a bad day? This guy spent three hours upside down in the wreckage of his truck, with sulfuric acid dripping onto his head
source: ktbs.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Italy's first bus with atheist advertisements hits the streets, promptly breaks down. Where is your God now?
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
French "Spider Man" scales 73 story Hong Kong skyscraper in 40 minutes without a net to draw attention to something, immediately surrenders afterwards
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The News & Observer (NC))
 
 
 
Having solved all other problems, North Carolina legislature seeks to outlaw another plant
source: newsobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KENS5)
 
 
 
"Thank you for calling 911. Will this be cash or charge?"
source: kens5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Loneliness just as bad for you as smoking, experts say. In other news, state lawmakers propose new law banning people from visiting bars alone to limit exposure of others to secondhand loneliness
source: nbcphiladelphia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The London Paper)
 
 
 
The stewardesses will conclude the safety demonstration and then pass round a huge wrap of coke
source: thelondonpaper.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSFA)
 
 
 
Cement truck crashes in Waaaaaauuuuugh
source: wsfa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Your odds of being killed in a crash are higher if: a) the other vehicle is larger, b) you don't wear your seatbelt, c) you're driving your lawnmower on the highway
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
Man arrested after smashing out the windshield of a police cruiser with a cinder block. FARK: While the cruiser was parked at the local police department headquarters
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mercury-Register)
 
 
 
24-year-old checks off every item on his "unwise things to do while naked" list
source: orovillemr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Theme: Ninjas at their day jobs
source: images.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook